HOW DO I COMMUNICATE TO MY DATE THAT WE HAVE TO SPLIT THE BILL

[darkseid]

Fellow brothers, I'm in need of your assistance, and your insight would be highly appreciated.

I wanted to know, what's the best way of avoiding paying for a girl's order during a date without causing any awkwardness or coming off a bad way. Per GC wisdom, paying for her on the date would not yield the desired outcome of being intimate with a girl, so how do I let the lady know she has to pay for her own food without it being a big deal.

Again, your feedback will be appreciated

Cheers

 

[Inbocca]

Just ask the waiter or cashier for separate checks. If the girl makes a big deal about it, she was expecting you to pay. If that happens, say something along the lines of "I don't believe in paying for someone until I've gotten to know them."

I've never had it be an issue - from what I've seen, a lot of girls who expect you to pay for them don't tend to give you much in return.

 

[Parkour]

You have to believe that just giving her the opportunity to get to know you is enough incentive for her to be on the date. If you frame it right you'll be congruent with this and she'll know you're on balanced terms. The only time you might pay is if you are way past the point where any of this matters and it's just convenient to move forward. Even then it's sort of a "you've got the next one" sort of feeling.

 

[Alex471996]

I just tell them I'm broke before we get anything so can we just pay for our own drinks. Never gotten a bad response from this and pretty often end up taking them to the nearby 24 hour gym changeroom for a "workout" . But I do live in Australia which has a democratic socialist system so girls don't really care if your broke, especially if you play the lover card strong.

 

[Alex471996]

I just tell them I'm broke before we get anything so can we just pay for our own drinks. Never gotten a bad response from this and pretty often end up taking them to the nearby 24 hour gym changeroom for a "workout" . But I do live in Australia which has a democratic socialist system so girls don't really care if your broke, especially if you play the lover card well.

 

[PrettyDecent]

Say at the beginning of the date, "hey, you want to split this one?". If she says no, just say "sweet, didn't realise I was getting a free meal today!"

I've never actually had it happen to me, but this is how I'd handle it now.

Nick

 

[darkseid]

Thanks for the feedback gents, truly appreciate that.

Just came from the date, couldn't close tho

 

[Tim Iron]

I always go on a date where I buy 2 bottles of malt drink and 2 bottles of water that I can easily afford to pay.... no need to split the bill, it is cheap.

A similar one is going to a Cafe to buy two cups of coffee that you can easily pay for... no need to split the bill. I heard Starbucks is expensive so don't go there.... it removes the headache of trying to get her to split the bill when your date is affordable (cheap).

 

[Tim Iron]

Getting intimate with a girl is not about splitting the bill... it is more about physical attraction, personality attraction, logistics and pushing things to go somewhere private (hotel room or my house)... I prefer not to worry myself about splitting a bill that is less than $1.50 (less than 500 Naira - my local currency) with a girl that I invited to meet with me - it doesn't make sense to me... I follow the common sense principle that whoever gives the invite should pay, so I make my bill as affordable as possible.

Even though Chase says split the bill or have her pay, I don't follow his advise.

Tayo,

It's not about the money it's about the frame.

 

[Alex471996]

I think it depends on your financial situation to. I'm broke so if I covered the girl i would come across as way too keen. Where as if your rich paying for say a girls drink is negligible investment and won't come across as trying too hard.

 

[Hue]

I usually take girls places I've already gone to. Because of this, I know the menu/drink options of the joint. When we start deciding what we're getting, I'll recommend a cheap option, and a more pricey one, saying "This one's great too, if you have the cash for it" / "I don't know how much cash you brought but this one kills it" or something along those lines. Implying she'll be using her money for her bill.

I do this frequently, and the question of who's buying usually never comes up. Almost always results in splitting or her offering to pay for me.

Hueman

 

[Grand Pooba]

Agree on the place to go ahead of time.

When the check comes:
"Hey, let's split it."
"Ok."

 

[.....]

Slay,

Tayo,

It's not about the money it's about the frame.

O'kay....would you mind explaining me a little deeper on this whole frame battle that you are talking about.

Thanks.

 

[Tim Iron]

I think the difference I have with you guys about splitting the bill is the fact that the places I go to require you to pay immediately you collect your drinks/food.

Most of the time, I am in a situation where the lady I invite to meet in a restaurant/bar doesn't order till I make an order for both of us... so ordering something cheap works for me.

Some years back, when I order a drink, I usually ask her, "so what would you drink" - now I don't do that.

I have never been in a scenario where a lady orders without asking me... if she tries to order something else from what I ordered (like food) I say "we are not staying that long"