How important is Facebook?

[deepthoughts02]

So I'm thinking about deleting my Facebook account before I go off to university this year. I was wondering how important do you all view Facebook for women? I don't mean messaging/adding random girls, but lets say you meet a girl, she adds you on Facebook, she now has a chance to remind herself about what you look like, and potentially see what type of guy you are from the photos/posts you're tagged in.

Do you feel this is a good or bad thing for the chase?

 

[Axel Page]

I personally do not like to add the chicks I am trying to bang. I keep my facebook separate from all that. It only gives them more of an opportunity to scrutinize you (pics, info, wall, etc), and ultimately gives them a way to screen you out. Less is more.

 

[Eric]

It's a hindrance. It makes you less mysterious, and makes it easier to know what you're up to / your relationship status. It makes you complacent and unwilling to put yourself in the hole (in terms of not having options with women, and thus not going to meet new girls) and make you hungry for life. It's also harder to juggle relationships so there's that too. I have a lot of girls ping me every so often, over text or phone call, to check up on what I'm doing and usually you can just invite them over.

 

[Doctor]

I deleted my Facebook before heading off to uni last year and I can tell you how it worked out for me.

When a girl asks you, as happens a lot at the start of uni, if she can add you on Facebook and you tell her you don't have it; the look on some of these girls faces is priceless! They cannot believe it, their whole life is on Facebook, they go home and chat for hours on there with their girlfriends, worrying about what Amie's latest status update really means. Then here is this guy who doesn't even have Facebook. Who the hell is he?

For most girls this builds massive intrigue. Their eyes widen as they choke out the question "why?" and it's fun to play with answering that one in different ways.

However, I have had this go the other way sometimes too. Some girls life's, especially teenagers, are so entrenched in Facebook that when you tell them you don't have it they simply assume you must be some kind of social outcast who lives under a bridge and bangs rocks together for entertainment. Think of the kind of girls who would say "I would never date him, he doesn't even have Facebook, ew!". This tends to be the young shallow type of girls who react like this so if they are your type you might be better served by having a Facebook. You better be damn sure it's full of shirtless pics of your perfect abs at the beach though.

One last thing of note as I wasn't expecting this, but it worked well for me. At uni I joined a couple of very female dominated sports clubs. They all post training schedules on a Facebook group so I was forced to sign back up. I made an account with only one pic (me riding a motorbike, you can't see my face) and set everything to private. I also set it to only let friends of friends add me, and I have 0 friends on that account so basically no-one can add me. So to recap, the girls can see me in the group but when they click my profile there is one pic and they cannot add me.

This drives them nuts! I have had numerous messages along the lines of "I want to add you but it won't let me" and when I explain why that is they even just message me their numbers without me asking. Needless to say this is massive chase mechanics on their part and a great way to start an interaction. Trust me when I say that even girls I haven't spoken to at the sports clubs do this fairly regularly.

So yeah, that was longer than I planned but that is my experience of not having Facebook at uni. Basically unless you really want to go after the bitchy, cliquey bimbo girls then I would delete it and tell any girl who asks why that you prefer communicating the old fashioned way, and then give them a cheeky smile. If you do want to go after the bimbos then make damn sure you have a perfect profile full of awesome pics and amazing status updates!

-Doctor

 

[TheWiseFool]

I deleted mine. Spend your time however you want, but me personally, it is a great way to WASTE time.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I feel that unlike other social networks, Facebook is very personal and to those of us who want to live the lifestyle of getting around that can be a major hindrance. Society still looks down on men that sleep with a lot of women and it is something that can screw up the views that people have of you. Back during the Myspace days you could use a fake name and only people that knew in real life could find you because your real name was not visible, on Facebook it is there for the entire world to see. I have always felt bothered by this, hopefully the newer social networks aren't nearly as personal.

Something else I have found is that Facebook has changed over the years. Back in 2007 and 2008 teenagers and college kids would log on but now it is loaded with older people and parents. The younger generation has moved on to Instagram and Twitter as opposed to staying on Facebook. I know I am one of the few to think this but Facebook was very invasive. It required you to use your real name for social networking with friends and strangers and it required you to give your location, where you had visited, and where you went to school. It was just too much.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Facebook is good, but not so important.

I understand why Chase highly suggest us to delete it, but i still have it because my friends all wonder where did i go and beg me to have it back online. So yes i still have it, but i never post anything on my wall. I use it to check out the well being of my friends.

Sounds abit "fatherly" but yea..

(i forgot i might need it for dance competitions, events and promotions, so far i never post anything except cover photo and profile photo but i still need it. Occasionally i message girls but honestly it's an idiot response. -.- I can't seem to get it to work so well. SO Chase, here's my shoutout, Thanks for telling me not to date online so much!!! IT's so hard.)

z@c+

 

[Franco]

dt,

I was wondering how important do you all view Facebook for women?

It's not important at all, and if that's the only reason you were considering keeping it, then I wouldn't hold onto it. At that point, it is just a hindrance.

That being said, if you have other uses for Facebook (such as finding events, marketing, or organizing your OWN events to invite people to), then Facebook can be advantageous. However, only a small percentage of people actually use Facebook this way, and most people use it to become "orbiters" and comment/post on people's walls to invoke validation from others. That is a poor way to use it.

I use Facebook every day, and I have absolutely no intention of deleting mine. However, I never show any girls any type of validation on there and use it for many other reasons -- including the occasional laugh from pages that post funny shit, which can actually help increase your sense of humor if you feel like you're lacking that. But never use Facebook as a means to contact women you are interested in engaging in sex with; it will only work against you in that fashion.

- Franco

 

[PinotNoir]

Well, not that important. We got along fine without it for years. It's only been around since when? 2004?

For me, I no longer add women that I'm dating on facebook. If we get into a serious relationship, then I may add them.

But, I keep facebook because I be-friended a lot of foreign exchange students in college (mainly from England) that I got along with quite well (and some other guy/gals from other states/countries in my travels). It's really the only way I can keep in touch, since no one likes email anymore (or emailing the same thing to every person). However, I skype them sometimes too, so I could probably get away with deleting facebook completely. I also use it to keep track of my sibling/family/niece/etc. that live out of state. It's nice to see photos of that.

Other than that, I just post random statuses of whatever I want about that are whatever I'm interested in or reading at the time and photos when I travel, and I guess some people enjoy seeing these things from me and still feel apart of my life (at least, they liked it).

It's not essential, but has benefits. But as Franco said, it shouldn't be for dating women; the less tools you have for chasing women the better And it's one big egg-drop soup of women chasers, orbiters, facebook stalkers, etc. Things can get messy and runny, and after 30 min, you're still hungry!

EDIT: I've also found it harder to get over women that I have been in relationships with that I have added on facebook, as you can constantly see her pictures and posts and still feel apart of her life and connected -- even though you're not at all; you're just one drop of a pool of other guys/gals seeing the same stuff. So, be careful.

 

[Big Daddy]

I created a Facebook account in 2011, I think. Just added a handful of friends, around 10, and set every option to private. Just by adding those 10 friends, I kept appearing in other's people "people you might know..." list, and soon I had 50 friends request, but didn't add anyone, otherwise I'd keep receiving friend request from people of my high school I barely remembered.

I used it for roughly one year, because people would organize gatherings in Facebook groups, and it was easier to keep track of everything. I'm practically a ghost there, and when people ask, I say I don't have Facebook.The reaction of people isn't always

the look on some of these girls faces is priceless! They cannot believe it, their whole life is on Facebook (...). Who the hell is he? For most girls this builds massive intrigue. Their eyes widen as they choke out the question "why?" and it's fun to play with answering that one in different ways.

as Doctor said, mainly, I think, because of location. Around here, hot girls have thousands of followers and so do the higher caliber guys. My guy friends frequently talk about a super hot girl everyone know about because she has 5k followers on Instagram whose I naturally don't know and they're like "dude, seriously, how come you don't know HER?"

Here, everyone has Instagram. Everyone check in every place they go on Foursquare. They're on groups on Whatsapp that know "what's happening". Heck, there are even people who upload shit to YouTube. Saying that you don't know about party X or girl Y may sound a bit like social ostracism.

I think not having a Facebook might make you more mysterious, but just up to a certain point. Or if you're older. If you're close to 20s, it makes you look like a weirdo. I mean, "you're so busy you can't log on Facebook", but is 20 while I personally know people that are in their 30s with their own companies earning rivers of money per month and are on Facebook?

Here's the real problem with Facebook: people just don't how to filter it. My news feed is disabled, my chat is disabled, I don't follow anyone, and my Facebook password is so huge I have to keep it noted in a piece of paper somewhere (this actually reduces the amount of times I feel like logging), so I rarely lost big chunks of time due to Facebook. (If I ever did, it was way, way back in the time.) If you meet a girl at a club or a bar and don't want her to have your Facebook, you can always say that you don't have (even if you do). But keeping track of your social circles is something that can be done once per week instead of watching YouTube videos, and won't do you any bad.

Not having Facebook/Instagram didn't make any major difference in my life, but I was wondering that it wouldn't be bad to have at least an account that people could check up, even if they couldn't add me as their friend. That I said, I want to slowly build a killer Facebook/Instagram profile, yet VERY minimalist, just as Doctor outlined. Something which the purpose is to screen girls who are interested, keep track of wild parties and build a solid circle social circle management tool and expand the circles themselves and make me seem like a cool enough guy.

Everyone's input is highly valuable, as always, but Franco - I'd like to hear what you have to say, particularly, because: 1) You're almost the only one around here that advocates the use of Facebook as a tool and 2) You said that you were social circle king in college. I'm assuming social media might have played a role on it?

Considering the date of the last post, a disclaimer: I realize it's been months since the last post and posting here would be against the online forums "etiquette", but... you see, I found this post using the search, just like - I suspect - much people do around here. If I were to create yet ANOTHER post on the subject, I would lose pretty much every response given in this thread, and probably everyone who has posted already won't post again. As long as I stay within the social media topic, I see no problem in posting this.