How to be HOOKUP material

[Spyce D]

Is it something to do with fashion , vibe or what is it ?

Currently, I have decided to focus more on casual dating , hookups , no strings attached stuff .

And was wondering what will make girls think of me as a hookup material ?

Maybe it's physique , looks , sexiness ?

And I also want to give off daddy vibes ... ( not talking about sugar daddy here , but more like a sexy dominant vibe )

 

[James D]

Is it something to do with fashion , vibe or what is it ?

Currently, I have decided to focus more on casual dating , hookups , no strings attached stuff .

And was wondering what will make girls think of me as a hookup material ?

Maybe it's physique , looks , sexiness ?

And I also want to give off daddy vibes ... ( not talking about sugar daddy here , but more like a sexy dominant vibe )

Everything you listed are cool things to have and make you hookup material.

What a man should focus on depends on his current situation.

So take a look on what you need improving so that, at best, when improved, it's an asset, and at worst, at least it's not a liability once you take care of it.

If you're not an attractive guy to look at, then you zone in on looks (fashion, physique, hairstyle)

If that's handled but you can't pull girls, you ramp up your sexual vibe.

To properly answer your question, being hookup material ultimately boils down to being better than average.

Make a list of your fundamentals and see where you score. Scoring average or below average is a big no.

Your conversaional ability doesn't have to be exceptional but has to be better than average.

You must stand out in some way.

 

[Spyce D]

Everything you listed are cool things to have and make you hookup material.

What a man should focus on depends on his current situation.

So take a look on what you need improving so that, at best, when improved, it's an asset, and at worst, at least it's not a liability once you take care of it.

If you're not an attractive guy to look at, then you zone in on looks (fashion, physique, hairstyle)

If that's handled but you can't pull girls, you ramp up your sexual vibe.

To properly answer your question, being hookup material ultimately boils down to being better than average.

Make a list of your fundamentals and see where you score. Scoring average or below average is a big no.

Your conversaional ability doesn't have to be exceptional but has to be better than average.

You must stand out in some way.

Ok , so I have got naturally good looks . But I don't take care of them .

I have been working on my fashion ... Maybe that's why I am not getting harsh rejections while approaching .

A bad thing about my fashion is that I don't wear fit clothes that makes me look physically weak .

I am slim right now . That's a bit minus and my posture isn't that good either . I am 174 cm , 60 kilos / 132 lbs ....

Being better than average. That's good .

I think I need to get a better hairstyle .

Speaking of sexual vibe ... Currently I have fun vibe , but still have trouble having a hint of sexuality in me .

I can work on that .

My convos are decent now but still have lot to learn .

 

[James D]

Ok , so I have got naturally good looks . But I don't take care of them .

I have been working on my fashion ... Maybe that's why I am not getting harsh rejections while approaching .

A bad thing about my fashion is that I don't wear fit clothes that makes me look physically weak .

I am slim right now . That's a bit minus and my posture isn't that good either . I am 174 cm , 60 kilos / 132 lbs ....

Being better than average. That's good .

I think I need to get a better hairstyle .

Speaking of sexual vibe ... Currently I have fun vibe , but still have trouble having a hint of sexuality in me .

I can work on that .

My convos are decent now but still have lot to learn .

There you go, got yoursefl a game plan.

Being naturally good looking makes you above average by default, you just have to take care of the rest.

Better fitting clothes and better fashion is as close as you can get to a magic pill for improving your looks. Literally have to buy new clothes and voila, you walk out of the store a more attractive man.

Same for hairstyle. Trip to one good hairsalon and you're good.

Seems a lot of these "issues" can be fixed pretty quickly, which is great!

That's different from someone who is 60 pounds overweight, for instance.

You should be up and running pretty soon!

 

[Spyce D]

There you go, got yoursefl a game plan.

Being naturally good looking makes you above average by default, you just have to take care of the rest.

Better fitting clothes and better fashion is as close as you can get to a magic pill for improving your looks. Literally have to buy new clothes and voila, you walk out of the store a more attractive man.

Same for hairstyle. Trip to one good hairsalon and you're good.

Seems a lot of these "issues" can be fixed pretty quickly, which is great!

That's different from someone who is 60 pounds overweight, for instance.

You should be up and running pretty soon!

So , it all comes down to simply me taking care of myself .

And me improving my posture .

So .... All I got to do is take care of myself and I will become hookup material . Wow !!

Starting today .

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

To be put in the "Mr Right Now" box

Appearance - either very vain, or very non-conventional - she is curious, but could never be serious.
Behavior with Others - She not only has to see you with other people, she has to see how you treat them, and how they treat you.
Pre-Selection - other girls need to show body language that favors you. Ideally when you're not interacting with them (which is somewhat beyond your control), but also while you're dealing with them.

Behavior with Her - High emotional intensity, which is sometimes high energy and sometimes not, depending on the social situation. Playful, mischief, seductive. I tend to lean more into engaging, so for me it's outrageous statements said with a straight face, where she's not sure if I'm serious.

My regular game - i.e. the psychological hook - is a lot about "is he serious or not, I have to find out"

For me, to be more in the "Mr. Right Now" zone - a lot of it's about not taking her seriously.

I've found some success about implying her sexuality/proclivities and then being dismissive of it.

There was a famous joke from How I Met Your Mother

I've never seen the show, but I did see a clip.
Robin is asking Ted's date how many men she's slept with

If the girl had only been with 1 guy, she's a prude.
If she'd been with 2 guys, she's a slut.

Setting up that sort of impossible dynamic, a way for a girl to have no real options - that's great for positioning and framing.

 

[Spyce D]

For me, to be more in the "Mr. Right Now" zone - a lot of it's about not taking her seriously.

Makes sense cuz up untill now I was still taking chicks seriously.

I've found some success about implying her sexuality/proclivities and then being dismissive of it.

I don't get it ... Can you explain it a bit ?

High emotional intensity, which is sometimes high energy and sometimes not, depending on the social situation. Playful, mischief, seductive. I tend to lean more into engaging, so for me it's outrageous statements said with a straight face, where she's not sure if I'm serious.

True .

The thing is I have spoken outrageous stuff but with a laughing face and a girl even asked me if I actually meant all that ...

The only reason I kind of lost her was I moved too slow . Posted about her in my previous thread about regret .

Moving on , let's give it a shot .

Let's have a sexy vibe that drives chicks nuts .

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

Makes sense cuz up untill now I was still taking chicks seriously.


I don't get it ... Can you explain it a bit ?

It's sort of "high level" stuff.

Guys that look like one night stands, have to act like one night stands, and say things that are consistent.

So for me, I can dance. That's part of my DNA/Culture/Vibe.

If I'm at a spot, and i'm interacting with a chick,

WIA - You don't look like you can dance. And you know what they say about girls that can't dance

Chick - What? They can't fuck?

WIA - *in a face that screams Good Christian Boy, and in a tone where I'm appalled* - That they don't make good dance partners. OMG, what type of girl are you... Is she always like this?"...

Again, this is sort of "high level"

• The content is somewhat important in that it starts her down this path
• I'm used to having these types of conversations
• I understand timing, implication, and inferrence
• I have an expressive face
• I use body language
• I use my vocal tones to heighten the delivery
• I bring in her friend group as part of the experience

This is like maybe 7 seconds out of an interaction - but it makes an emotional impact on the girl, on her friends listening in/participating, and a social impact on the friends, and on the girl.

When my aim is to come off as flirtatious, seductive, not-boyfriend material, it's about creating this vibe during the interaction. What she says doesn't matter.

If I'm really trying to screen for something long term, it's seductive, more serious, and my reactions to what she says and does are more extreme. What she says does matter.

I can't really get into the nitty gritty without more context, but if you're going for Fuck Boy Style - it's an accumulation of a lot of things.

True .

The thing is I have spoken outrageous stuff but with a laughing face and a girl even asked me if I actually meant all that ...

The only reason I kind of lost her was I moved too slow . Posted about her in my previous thread about regret .

Moving on , let's give it a shot .

Let's have a sexy vibe that drives chicks nuts .

If you can think of a time where this went poorly, You need more chicks in your pipeline. There's not enough data.

• It might be content.
• It might be delivery.
• It might be nonverbal communication
• It might be subcommunication
• It might be framing
• It might be the venue
• It might be the social dynamics

But please believe us when we tell you that you can have all sorts of wild conversations and get good results.

 

[KJ Francis]

Another angle more "back end" dynamic than "front end" attraction ... The 100% boyfriend disqualifier. Lately I noticed Skills wrote about being more ambiguous with the conservative girls... But if you want to increase how polarizing you are, imagine you met a girl on vacation... She then has a narrower role for you in her life that's clearly defined. It's also a finer screen.

So if you have a passionate life mission that will be taking you away from her city, then you can't possibly be a provider and default to lover. This worked well for me during a more transient time. I had plans to be there for months still, which lets her have you for more than one night and wonder what fate could bring...

If you have only a slight inkling to move two hours away after college, you can still really lean into it while being honest and congruent, and hopefully more mysterious...

But if it's tied into you knowing what you want and going for it, that's an attractive quality to women with choice. It's also the underpinning of seeing her and taking action to lead her from meet to bed.

"I've got big plans, baby..." without sounding like a douchebag

 

[slashrfnr]

On the fashion part, it will require some searching, but have a look around the board for stuff on archtypes. They may help you work with the hook up vibe. I remember reading on this forum about how dressing like a fuck boy does work, even if you don't like it.

On the more general advice on fashion, be careful on your sources. I'm not super qualified on seduction, but I've always been quite into fashion/style, and am known in my social circles for being well dressed. However, well dressed does not always = sexy. If you asked a load of well dressed guys what they thought of the fuck boy attire, they would probably tell you that its terrible style - and that may be the case, but for some girls, they are attracted to that look. So standard fashion advice e.g Male Fashion Advice on reddit may make you more well dressed in general, but not make girls look at you as hook up material.

@DoWhatWorks nightgame guide has some good tips. The picture of the guy wearing the black hat, sunglasses, and black coat is what i would call fuck boy attire. If i saw him out and about, I'd say he looks like an absolute wanker and very try hard, but a) its a polarizing look, so it may turn off 95% of girls, but turn on the 5% of girls that are DTF, and b) this is the difference between the male gaze and the female gaze

It all depends on your aim. If you just want to fuck chicks, dress according to one of the archetypes, and your life will probably be easier.