How to best address the talk of racial preferences when it comes up?

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Occasionally when I am talking to people, especially girls, the talk of racial preferences comes up. For some reason I notice that black girls talk about it quite a lot and will often ask "Are you into black girls?". The truth of the matter is I am not, maybe I am biologically a racist but I am just not attracted to majority (almost all) of the black girls I run into in real life but I try to evade it and say things like "it depends on the person more than the race". I feel like since I am not clear enough, these girls take it as a token and often come on to me and get touchy feeling with me when I am not interested. To a smaller extent some of the southeast Asian girls I run into do this but are not nearly as aggressive.

Now I can see the risk of actually speaking my mind and saying no because I notice then a lot of people will say "well what if she looks like (insert black celebrity)" to which honestly I am not even into most black celebrities outside of maybe Rebecca Hall (who is half black even though she doesn't look it). Then that in itself makes a whole different conversation with the PC police telling me to be more "open minded" and all that. In general I would like to know how to avoid this topic whenever it does come up or to best handle it. Anyone have some advice?

 

[R.A.D.]

Do you like black girls? -- I like girls, or i like you.

What do you think about chinese, black, red, violet, green people?. Well i have met many amazing and depicable, interesting and boring people of all sorts so i dont think their race had anything to do with it.


Thats it, racial topics the more you get into the more you have to bias or will be forced to bias and the more you bias for some reason or the other it will be wrong, because its one of those controversial social topics. So making clear that races are of little importance to you and knowing people is, (i think) is the best way to handle it.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

R.A.D I think he said he does do that but the girls he doesn't want are confused and assume he is into them. Your best bet here is to just lie and say that you are in a relationship, having been around aggressive women I have found that any small chance or hint of you being interested can end up in them misunderstanding you and coming on to you.

Say something along the lines of "I am in a relationship and I love my girlfriend so I can't really answer those questions right now". I find the preference talk to be a catch 22 myself. You say yes and you have girls you don't want coming on to you but when you say no you have people calling you a racist or trying to urge you to be more "open minded". For some odd reason I notice black american women tend to ask this question a lot more frequently than any other kind of women, in fact those are the only kinds of women I have seen ask this question.

 

[Franco]

Altair,

I don't see anything wrong with this, personally. Girls collect orbiters all the time, and just like we tell guys here that it's their responsibility to back off when they realize something isn't going anywhere, it's also the girl's responsibility to recognize this as well.

The important thing here is to obviously not invite her out on a date or invite her home if you aren't interested in taking her as a sexual partner. In the meantime, there's nothing wrong with using the pre-selection to get you other girls. If she's hideous to look at, however, then you may want to roll with Proactivity's suggestion so that you stop her cold in her tracks from being around you.

- Franco

 

[orion222]

Occasionally when I am talking to people, especially girls, the talk of racial preferences comes up. For some reason I notice that black girls talk about it quite a lot and will often ask "Are you into black girls?". The truth of the matter is I am not, maybe I am biologically a racist but I am just not attracted to majority (almost all) of the black girls I run into in real life but I try to evade it and say things like "it depends on the person more than the race". I feel like since I am not clear enough, these girls take it as a token and often come on to me and get touchy feeling with me when I am not interested. To a smaller extent some of the southeast Asian girls I run into do this but are not nearly as aggressive.

Now I can see the risk of actually speaking my mind and saying no because I notice then a lot of people will say "well what if she looks like (insert black celebrity)" to which honestly I am not even into most black celebrities outside of maybe Rebecca Hall (who is half black even though she doesn't look it). Then that in itself makes a whole different conversation with the PC police telling me to be more "open minded" and all that. In general I would like to know how to avoid this topic whenever it does come up or to best handle it. Anyone have some advice?

I'm even worse because I am only attracted to white girls. I would never go on a date with an Asian, Black, Indian, etc. girl. It is not racism; it is what you are physically attracted to, and you can't help that.

If a black girl feels comfortable enough to ask you that question, you're obviously engaging with them. They would never get the chance to ask me that question, because I would leave right away. That's my answer to your question.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

It isn't that simple. Some of these girls knew me growing up (the region of the US I am in has a lot of black people) so there is that familiarity and their friends use it as an excuse to approach me and get close to me. When I reject them or make it clear I am not interested a lot of them keep persisting and then bring up the race question. When I say I am not interested in black girls, some of these girls throw a fit and start trying to guilt trip me, it is kinda creepy too because I notice black girls get touchy even when you are not interested in them. I don't see this with black african or black latin american girls (dominicans and brazilians for example), just with young black american women.

 

[Franco]

Altair,

When I say I am not interested in black girls, some of these girls throw a fit and start trying to guilt trip me, it is kinda creepy too because I notice black girls get touchy even when you are not interested in them.

I wouldn't respond with this. That's just asking for those girls to guilt trip you.

Instead, just don't reciprocate any of their advances and say you have something else to do. Or just go talk to a girl that you DO find attractive and move things forward with her instead. I'm not sure why you would be bothered by female attention -- it only works in your favor for pre-selection.

- Franco

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Franco, because there are some women I am just not into (black or darker indian). It is not due to racism or anything, I have friends from those backgrounds who are females but it seems like these girls have a very tough time taking no for an answer and I just don't know how to deal with it. Hot girls in my area are usually very scarce and I say this having vacationed in other areas.

It is like the more I say "sorry I am busy" the girls usually come on to me even stronger and some start grabbing me. Now these girls are not by any means Meagan Good, Alicia Keys, or Kerry Washington, a lot of these girls are more, as people in my area say "ratchet" or trashy. I am trying my best not to sound like a bigot here but this is a situation specific kind of advice.