How to correct people?

[TomGray]

Without coming across as a jerk?

 

[Ross]

How do I correct people?*

I don't want to come across as a jerk.*

Dude. Proper grammar.

Well. I don't really know what you're talking about. Can you give me a few specific examples that you're thinking about?

 

[Nuncle]

Do you mean grammar and stuff or when they are being a jerk themselves?

 

[TomGray]

Nuncle, actually, both situations I'm curious about. But Eric, as an example, some time ago I saw a girl in the gym using terrible form on her shoulder raises. I tried to be polite: "Hey, I saw you doing your shoulder raises. Is there a particular reason why you do them that way? Because I try to do them without moving my back, to prevent injury" I didn't come across too well but she did perform it with better form when she did it again. I guess, like everything, it's all in how you say it. So what's the best way to say it?

 

[TomGray]

But Eric, as an example

Oops, I meant Ross. :/

 

[Ross]

Typically I'd have an authoritative & playful tone if it was something like that,

"Hey, just a little tip, you'll be less prone to injury if you keep your back still; I'd hate to see your hard work go to nothing!"

Typically it's hard to correct people out of the blue if you don't really know them. It also causes them to lose face, as you are pointing out a flaw/something wrong and telling them to do it better. So, you may want to rebound the negative with a positive, like in the example above. You're giving her the tip/correction, but not completely laying into her.

For pick-up reasons, I suggest not opening her with this. Do it later on, when you're going to the gym the morning after an amazing night in bed . Then she'll listen to you and probably be a lot more grateful.

 

[Knight]

If it isn't a big deal I usually let it pass and let them save face. I've learnt that a lot of the time if someone isn't coming to you directly for help it just comes off a bit weird. Most of the time someone else will correct them anyway.