How to reduce neuroticsm and increase conscientious - Big5

[empath]

This is the test I gave.

Free open-source BigFive personality traits test

Take a free, open-source Big Five personality test. Learn to know your personality traits and compare yourself with your partner, colleagues, friends or family.

bigfive-test.com

I score high on neuroticsm -( basically being anxious in general and taking stress about things which should not worry you)

And low on conscience . (Ability to be organised ,focus and being diligent in general) - I can do this when needed but otherwise I am a free spirit and careless.


conscience is correlated most by external measures of success like money and all.

Ideally I don't care much about conscience much but I want to reduce my neuroticsm because it leads useless worry and bad decision making.

If I can't reduce it best for me would be to increase conscience.

If anyone is familiar with personality tests and big5 and have advice how to work on it.

Clicking on the link will give detailed break up of my personality.

If anyone can look it and give advice to be a better seducer and person overall.

Also, if anyone else shares their results and how they look at life, seduction, family, future and career etc .

Will help to pick better mindset.

 

[Chase]

Are you ADD?

You can't really change your underlying personality traits.

You can shore up your weaknesses to some extent through exposure. e.g., if you are the nervous type, spend a while plunging yourself into all sort of nerve-wracking situations. It won't cute you, but it'll take a lot more to shake you.

Low on conscientiousness, you can set up reminders, set schedules, use routines, etc. But you are never going to transition to being a high conscientiousness personality type.

I dated a chick with ADD. Just trying to train her to put her shoes in the shoe rack instead of wearing them all over the place and getting the floor dirty then leaving them in the middle of the hallway for people to trip over was an epic adventure. That is just one example. If you're high in conscientiousness your brain just automatically says, "Enter home with shoes on. Shoes go in the shoe rack FIRST THING!" It's basically impossible to forget. These are simply different brain wirings. No way to change from one to another.

Best you can do is use timers, routines, schedules, and build habits you do on muscle memory rather than need to remind yourself to do (which you aren't going to be good at).

Chase

 

[empath]

I have never been formally diagnosed but I think I

Are you ADD?

You can't really change your underlying personality traits.

You can shore up your weaknesses to some extent through exposure. e.g., if you are the nervous type, spend a while plunging yourself into all sort of nerve-wracking situations. It won't cute you, but it'll take a lot more to shake you.

Low on conscientiousness, you can set up reminders, set schedules, use routines, etc. But you are never going to transition to being a high conscientiousness personality type.

I dated a chick with ADD. Just trying to train her to put her shoes in the shoe rack instead of wearing them all over the place and getting the floor dirty then leaving them in the middle of the hallway for people to trip over was an epic adventure. That is just one example. If you're high in conscientiousness your brain just automatically says, "Enter home with shoes on. Shoes go in the shoe rack FIRST THING!" It's basically impossible to forget. These are simply different brain wirings. No way to change from one to another.

Best you can do is use timers, routines, schedules, and build habits you do on muscle memory rather than need to remind yourself to do (which you aren't going to be good at).

Chase

I have never been formally diagnosed but maybe yes, I think so I am and a normal person won't think like it.

As personality i think it's changeable if situation demands so. A lot of things about fundamental is same only, say charisma.

As for being conscience, I am able to train it to some extent. I shared room with organised person, keeping room organise is in my own benefit so, these days I automatically put my shoes in rack, keep my clothes and blankets in place. Its tough to start i do it without fail whereas I remember I used to keep them displaced all the time.

So I think personality is mostly changeable if one desires it.

I have certainly seen changes in myself.

Also, I think along the line ok this is a thought process i naturally didn't thought but its a good thought so I will keep it to myself.


And for neuroticm I don't want to change my anger part only anxiety and depression and maybe some part of immoderation.

And I used to score very high psychopathy when I had not done very much socialization. As I was around people with more social sense and empathy it developed too, your article helped.

So maybe you want to rethink whether personality is changeable or not.

 

[Chase]

Its tough to start i do it without fail whereas I remember I used to keep them displaced all the time.

That's great. But that is building a habit. It is different from a default personality trait.

So I think personality is mostly changeable if one desires it.

I have certainly seen changes in myself.

Have you become high in conscientiousness then?

If so, then these would be accurate descriptors for you:

• Before you take anything from a store shelf, countertop, somewhere in someone's home, you make an instinctual mental note where it is to be sure you replace it precisely where you found it.
  
  
• You keep careful mental notes about what other people tell you about themselves, then are careful to always deal with them in the ways you're aware they work in optimally. For instance, if someone tells you he does not respond to loudness, demands, and orders, but rather only to careful, thoughtful explanations, then any time you need to convince that person of something you sit down and have a careful, thoughtful conversation with him that involves lots of active listening on your part and back-and-forth to ensure he understands things in a way that works for him.
  
  
• Whenever you do your work or construct an argument, you carefully think through possible complaints or counterarguments, that way you can be sure to address all those points within the work or argument itself, heading off issues before they even occur.
  

If that is you, and you used to be the opposite way, then you have switched your personality from low conscientiousness to high conscientiousness. Which would be amazing and probably make you a fascinating psychological case study.

I would bet it is a lot more likely you have simply built some good habits but overall you are still low in conscientiousness.

And I used to score very high psychopathy when I had not done very much socialization. As I was around people with more social sense and empathy it developed too, your article helped.

So maybe you want to rethink whether personality is changeable or not.

Glad to hear it!

People with ADD will come across low empathy because the way their attention spans work they have a difficult time focusing on other people. They do not actually lack empathy, but will appear like it.

I suspect what you're confusing here is mental health level change within a personality rather than direct change of the personality. Check out the Enneagram personality system; it's the best psychological system at cataloguing how personality types change as they move up or down the ladder of mental health.

Using the Enneagram Personality Type with Girls

The enneagram is a 9-part personality system. Its interpersonal benefits are huge; and it endlessly fascinates girls, with many uses in romance. Personality typing is always loads of fun. Girls like astrology, palmistry, cold reads, and other assorted personality tricks because girls tend to...

www.girlschase.com

If you're ADD you're likely a Type 8. Type 8s become insensitive and domineering as their mental health declines. As their mental health improves, they get a lot better.

Chase

 

[empath]

That's great. But that is building a habit. It is different from a default personality trait.



Have you become high in conscientiousness then?

If so, then these would be accurate descriptors for you:

• Before you take anything from a store shelf, countertop, somewhere in someone's home, you make an instinctual mental note where it is to be sure you replace it precisely where you found it.
  
  
• You keep careful mental notes about what other people tell you about themselves, then are careful to always deal with them in the ways you're aware they work in optimally. For instance, if someone tells you he does not respond to loudness, demands, and orders, but rather only to careful, thoughtful explanations, then any time you need to convince that person of something you sit down and have a careful, thoughtful conversation with him that involves lots of active listening on your part and back-and-forth to ensure he understands things in a way that works for him.
  
  
• Whenever you do your work or construct an argument, you carefully think through possible complaints or counterarguments, that way you can be sure to address all those points within the work or argument itself, heading off issues before they even occur.

If that is you, and you used to be the opposite way, then you have switched your personality from low conscientiousness to high conscientiousness. Which would be amazing and probably make you a fascinating psychological case study.

I would bet it is a lot more likely you have simply built some good habits but overall you are still low in conscientiousness.



Glad to hear it!

People with ADD will come across low empathy because the way their attention spans work they have a difficult time focusing on other people. They do not actually lack empathy, but will appear like it.

I suspect what you're confusing here is mental health level change within a personality rather than direct change of the personality. Check out the Enneagram personality system; it's the best psychological system at cataloguing how personality types change as they move up or down the ladder of mental health.

Using the Enneagram Personality Type with Girls

The enneagram is a 9-part personality system. Its interpersonal benefits are huge; and it endlessly fascinates girls, with many uses in romance. Personality typing is always loads of fun. Girls like astrology, palmistry, cold reads, and other assorted personality tricks because girls tend to...

www.girlschase.com

If you're ADD you're likely a Type 8. Type 8s become insensitive and domineering as their mental health declines. As their mental health improves, they get a lot better.

Chase

My type did came as 8. Actually both 7 and 8 has equal scores.

Just curious why did you thought I have ADD?

About the description you provided

1 is somewhat true.

2 is it depends on my mood if I can bulldoze I prefer it. Otherwise I try to be thoughtful

3 last one I don't do as I think its waste of energy if needed i will do it

Also the thing about conscientious first I was not aware only that this thought process exists like people are making mental notes.

Then once I understood I thought its a waste of energy I will do it if I need in future only.

However now I am fence like it be beneficial.

Also, like u listed out items i was never thinking on those terms, but if I get enough of these descriptions/observations then my intuition pattern recognition will start working and bring change in my personality.

Also you have written article on both anxiety and depression now say if you were to give test before you came to those realisation you would be scoring high on neuroticm than you now rigth?

Just curious why you don't believe personality is not changeable because i think its mostly depends on your environment, i just didn't had correct observations in my childhood. Also, in later half of life personality is shaped by career right?

 

[empath]

My type did came as 8. Actually both 7 and 8 has equal scores.

Just curious why did you thought I have ADD?

About the description you provided

1 is somewhat true.

2 is it depends on my mood if I can bulldoze I prefer it. Otherwise I try to be thoughtful

3 last one I don't do as I think its waste of energy if needed i will do it

Also the thing about conscientious first I was not aware only that this thought process exists like people are making mental notes.

Then once I understood I thought its a waste of energy I will do it if I need in future only.

However now I am fence like it be beneficial.

Also, like u listed out items i was never thinking on those terms, but if I get enough of these descriptions/observations then my intuition pattern recognition will start working and bring change in my personality.

Also you have written article on both anxiety and depression now say if you were to give test before you came to those realisation you would be scoring high on neuroticm than you now rigth?

Just curious why you don't believe personality is not changeable because i think its mostly depends on your environment, i just didn't had correct observations in my childhood. Also, in later half of life personality is shaped by career right?

Also to add this unwillingness to spend energy might be due to lack of future orientation.

Like it will be beneficial in future or more focus on short term benefits

 

[Chase]

I guess it depends what you think of as "personality."

I don't think, like, a detail-oriented anal-retentive people pleaser can really become a freewheeling devil-may-care hedonist, no. People can stretch the limits and move up and down in mental health, but their default traits are set.

If you see little kids from big families, they have VERY CLEAR default personalities that have specific elements from each of the mother and the father, but in different combinations among the different kids. It's very obvious that a lot of personality is genetically determined, with each kid getting a different roll of the genetic dice.

I can tell you right now, you probably have one parent who does not pay attention to details, is loud and opinionated, and prone to angry outbursts when he or she gets frustrated (which happens too easily/often). Not because "everybody has parents like that" (I don't), but because these personality traits are genetic. Like father (or mother) like son.

BUT... you will certainly differ in the expression of your personality as you move up and down in mental health. Yeah, you are going to be a lot less neurotic as you become mentally healthier. In this way, "mentally healthy you" can seem like a totally different person than "mentally unwell you."

My type did came as 8. Actually both 7 and 8 has equal scores.

Just curious why did you thought I have ADD?

Your description of your personality:

• High neuroticism (key personality trait of ADD)
• Low conscientiousness (another key personality trait of ADD)
• Angry outbursts (look up "ADD meltdowns" or "ADHD meltdowns"... happens when ADD folks get overwhelmed)
• Anxiety

I thought you also mentioned something about impulsivity somewhere?

Present time orientation / low future orientation is another typical ADD trait.

ADDs tend to be Type 8s (loud, brash, dominating personality type) and Type 7s (present & pleasure-focused whirling dervish enjoyers) in the Enneagram, yeah.

Also the thing about conscientious first I was not aware only that this thought process exists like people are making mental notes.

Then once I understood I thought its a waste of energy I will do it if I need in future only.

However now I am fence like it be beneficial.

lol

Well, it is useful if your brain can spare the resources.

ADD brains (which yours sounds like it is) are not good at dividing resources among a variety of little observations.

e.g., my ADD girl was just constantly misplacing things. Could never find her keys, could never find her phone, sometimes she would lose them multiple times in the same day. Then she would be flipping out looking for them, demanding anyone around help her look for them, lol. I would constantly be asking her, "Why the heck do you not just put your things down in the same place every time? Your problem would be solved!" and she just constantly said she could not remember to do that.

Well, since I knew she was always misplacing these things, I'd keep an eye out for them without even thinking about it and make a note of it. Going around the apartment, spot her keys sticking out from under a pot somewhere... mental note: "Her keys are under that pot," then forget all about it. Hours later she'd be freaking out unable to find her keys because she's about to be late and now her keys are missing, and I'd remember it and go, "Check under that pot in the living room," and then she'd have her keys. Who knows WHY she put her keys under a pot in the living room, but only ADD people can answer that one.

Just curious why you don't believe personality is not changeable because i think its mostly depends on your environment, i just didn't had correct observations in my childhood. Also, in later half of life personality is shaped by career right?

Personality, like IQ, is most malleable in youth.

The older you get, the more you regress toward your genetic predispositions.

Personality traits and IQ both seem to be up to 80% inheritance once you reach adulthood (though as low as 40% genetic in youth). There's a landmark "identical twins reared apart in totally different environments" study that's worth reading if interested.

It's why you see all those women who complain, "Oh my God, I'm turning into my mother," and men going, "I tried so hard to not turn into my dad, but..."

This whole weird theory that people are somehow tabula rasa and not the direct product of the full spectrum of genetic traits (both outer & inner) of their ancestors needs to die

Chase

 

[empath]

I guess it depends what you think of as "personality."

I don't think, like, a detail-oriented anal-retentive people pleaser can really become a freewheeling devil-may-care hedonist, no. People can stretch the limits and move up and down in mental health, but their default traits are set.

If you see little kids from big families, they have VERY CLEAR default personalities that have specific elements from each of the mother and the father, but in different combinations among the different kids. It's very obvious that a lot of personality is genetically determined, with each kid getting a different roll of the genetic dice.

I can tell you right now, you probably have one parent who does not pay attention to details, is loud and opinionated, and prone to angry outbursts when he or she gets frustrated (which happens too easily/often). Not because "everybody has parents like that" (I don't), but because these personality traits are genetic. Like father (or mother) like son.

BUT... you will certainly differ in the expression of your personality as you move up and down in mental health. Yeah, you are going to be a lot less neurotic as you become mentally healthier. In this way, "mentally healthy you" can seem like a totally different person than "mentally unwell you."



Your description of your personality:

• High neuroticism (key personality trait of ADD)
• Low conscientiousness (another key personality trait of ADD)
• Angry outbursts (look up "ADD meltdowns" or "ADHD meltdowns"... happens when ADD folks get overwhelmed)
• Anxiety

I thought you also mentioned something about impulsivity somewhere?

Present time orientation / low future orientation is another typical ADD trait.

ADDs tend to be Type 8s (loud, brash, dominating personality type) and Type 7s (present & pleasure-focused whirling dervish enjoyers) in the Enneagram, yeah.



lol

Well, it is useful if your brain can spare the resources.

ADD brains (which yours sounds like it is) are not good at dividing resources among a variety of little observations.

e.g., my ADD girl was just constantly misplacing things. Could never find her keys, could never find her phone, sometimes she would lose them multiple times in the same day. Then she would be flipping out looking for them, demanding anyone around help her look for them, lol. I would constantly be asking her, "Why the heck do you not just put your things down in the same place every time? Your problem would be solved!" and she just constantly said she could not remember to do that.

Well, since I knew she was always misplacing these things, I'd keep an eye out for them without even thinking about it and make a note of it. Going around the apartment, spot her keys sticking out from under a pot somewhere... mental note: "Her keys are under that pot," then forget all about it. Hours later she'd be freaking out unable to find her keys because she's about to be late and now her keys are missing, and I'd remember it and go, "Check under that pot in the living room," and then she'd have her keys. Who knows WHY she put her keys under a pot in the living room, but only ADD people can answer that one.



Personality, like IQ, is most malleable in youth.

The older you get, the more you regress toward your genetic predispositions.

Personality traits and IQ both seem to be up to 80% inheritance once you reach adulthood (though as low as 40% genetic in youth). There's a landmark "identical twins reared apart in totally different environments" study that's worth reading if interested.

It's why you see all those women who complain, "Oh my God, I'm turning into my mother," and men going, "I tried so hard to not turn into my dad, but..."

This whole weird theory that people are somehow tabula rasa and not the direct product of the full spectrum of genetic traits (both outer & inner) of their ancestors needs to die

Chase

Still this belief don't help me.

I know through sheet will power I can overcome the wiring or wire myself better.

What are the things you will suggest for someone with ADD to do better, if that person is willing to implement them?

 

[topcat]

Still this belief don't help me.

I know through sheet will power I can overcome the wiring or wire myself better.

What are the things you will suggest for someone with ADD to do better, if that person is willing to implement them?

Curious to what Chase’s response will be as i could see it being a help to myself..

But i’ll chime in. Your best bet is leveraging your strengths to compensate for your weaknesses.

For example. I also score horrendously low in conscientiousness (like 3%). I also score 2 in neuroticism and 0 in agreeableness (anybody surprised? hehe).

It’s basically impossible to motivate me to do things i don’t like or want to do. I’m extremely nonchalant and really dgaf.

In order to mimic high conscientiousness though i leverage my very high openness and doggedly pursue my curiosity with fervour or engage in things that trigger my disagreeable and competitive streak to achieve outsize results.

All personality configurations have their “superpower”. I suggest you do a comprehensive analysis of your personality and lean into your strengths. You’re liable to get a lot further along, more quickly and effectively doing this, than you will by fighting yourself into submission.

 

[Chase]

@empath,

Still this belief don't help me.

I know through sheet will power I can overcome the wiring or wire myself better.

What are the things you will suggest for someone with ADD to do better, if that person is willing to implement them?

Neuroticism above all is a mental health condition.

More mentally healthy = less neuroticism. Less mentally healthy = more neuroticism.

The focus should not be "I need to willpower myself into changing my personality."

It should instead be focused on, like @topcat mentions, using your strengths to fix problem areas and get better mental health.

For instance... a lot of folks with ADD have OCD as well. Do you have that? If so, you can use it to your advantage.

I'm not ADD, but I have a moderate amount of OCD. When I was a teen I was neurotic. My OCD was also becoming a problem. I was getting more and more particular about a variety of things having to be certain ways.

One day I decided to use my OCD to break my OCD habits. "Whenever I feel a compulsion to do some unnecessary OCD thing, I am going to immediately do the opposite," I decided. So if my fork, knife, napkin, etc. had to be a certain place at the dinner table, I'd deliberately push them into a different position. Doing enough of this led me to chill out about a lot of needless OCD things.

But then later once I was fighting depression, I used OCD again to get out of that: "every time I experience a negative thought I will go through this process." It became a compulsion for me that I would not allow myself to dwell on negative thoughts. Get whatever information you have to get from a situation, learn whatever lessons, but then boot it out of your mind and move on.

I don't know if you have any compulsive tendencies; anyway, that's just one example.

Everyone has strengths and weaknesses in his personality traits.

If you want to shore up your weaknesses, rather than try to willpower your way there (which is a bit like trying to willpower the tide to change), instead figure out what your strengths are and use those to redirect your weaknesses (which is more like setting up seawalls to channel the tide, rather than wade out into the water and try and beat the waves up).

Ultimately your aim is moving to a more mentally healthy state of mind, where you are less plagued by worries and insecurities and feel like you have more control, more abundance, more security, and are able to relax more in life and in your relationships. There are a lot of different roads there.

Chase

 

[empath]

@empath,



Neuroticism above all is a mental health condition.

More mentally healthy = less neuroticism. Less mentally healthy = more neuroticism.

The focus should not be "I need to willpower myself into changing my personality."

It should instead be focused on, like @topcat mentions, using your strengths to fix problem areas and get better mental health.

For instance... a lot of folks with ADD have OCD as well. Do you have that? If so, you can use it to your advantage.

I'm not ADD, but I have a moderate amount of OCD. When I was a teen I was neurotic. My OCD was also becoming a problem. I was getting more and more particular about a variety of things having to be certain ways.

One day I decided to use my OCD to break my OCD habits. "Whenever I feel a compulsion to do some unnecessary OCD thing, I am going to immediately do the opposite," I decided. So if my fork, knife, napkin, etc. had to be a certain place at the dinner table, I'd deliberately push them into a different position. Doing enough of this led me to chill out about a lot of needless OCD things.

But then later once I was fighting depression, I used OCD again to get out of that: "every time I experience a negative thought I will go through this process." It became a compulsion for me that I would not allow myself to dwell on negative thoughts. Get whatever information you have to get from a situation, learn whatever lessons, but then boot it out of your mind and move on.

I don't know if you have any compulsive tendencies; anyway, that's just one example.

Everyone has strengths and weaknesses in his personality traits.

If you want to shore up your weaknesses, rather than try to willpower your way there (which is a bit like trying to willpower the tide to change), instead figure out what your strengths are and use those to redirect your weaknesses (which is more like setting up seawalls to channel the tide, rather than wade out into the water and try and beat the waves up).

Ultimately your aim is moving to a more mentally healthy state of mind, where you are less plagued by worries and insecurities and feel like you have more control, more abundance, more security, and are able to relax more in life and in your relationships. There are a lot of different roads there.

Chase

Thanks man, seeing neuroticm as a mental health condition helps much more cause its not a change in personality now.

I don't care about conscientious much apart from the fact it cancels out bad effect of neuroticm because it makes one much more proactive.

Also, as long as much output is same like others I won't care if its good habit or personality.

Being less conscientious has its own advantage, I see one being very chill about stuff which makes a lot of people freak out.

Even my most of stress come from a diligent boss who expects same level of diligence from me naturally, obviously once he points out to me I can take care of it from next time.

Another part was just being able to do things because they are my duty/responsibility because I try to avoid/delay things if they are not fun even if they are my duty whereas most people will say ok its my responsibility lets finish without questioning much.

I guess I has somewhat of OCD especially about washing hands and my utensils being cleaned, if I am alone it comes backs but if i am in rush or with other people I let those habits pass. I was not able to it before but after observing other that they don't wash hands as much or clean utensils or drink from whatever thing it went away.

Yeah and the process you described in your depression article worked well for me as well.

I think being conscientious just being able to pay more attention to details and focus more with feeling less level of cognitive load than others.

Also, everytime I get the feeling its so boring.

As things become habit, cognitive load automatically goes down.

Idk what strength I have, I keep asking myself and come with none, Maybe I will need to develop them lolz.

 

[empath]

Curious to what Chase’s response will be as i could see it being a help to myself..

But i’ll chime in. Your best bet is leveraging your strengths to compensate for your weaknesses.

For example. I also score horrendously low in conscientiousness (like 3%). I also score 2 in neuroticism and 0 in agreeableness (anybody surprised? hehe).

It’s basically impossible to motivate me to do things i don’t like or want to do. I’m extremely nonchalant and really dgaf.

In order to mimic high conscientiousness though i leverage my very high openness and doggedly pursue my curiosity with fervour or engage in things that trigger my disagreeable and competitive streak to achieve outsize results.

All personality configurations have their “superpower”. I suggest you do a comprehensive analysis of your personality and lean into your strengths. You’re liable to get a lot further along, more quickly and effectively doing this, than you will by fighting yourself into submission.

Thanks man, I will focus on figuring out my strength and use them to mimic stuff, I do things which I find fun, so maybe try to make a game out of it or something.

I am also very curious and try to dig into things then and there if something excites me so maybe I will use it.

Unfortunately I am not super competitive, unless its something intellectual or based on some idea or theory I have conceived of belive it be true.

Just curious you had this idgf attitude naturally or you developed it yourself?

Why do you think you have low neuroticm? Like you belive in your skills that you have developed over time so you know your future is sorted or you are just very present oriented and don't think about future at all?

Also, are you self employed or doing a job?
And hypothetical if you had responsibility of having employee under you and making sure business does well so atleast they don't suffer will you fulfil it or bail out?

 

[topcat]

Thanks man, I will focus on figuring out my strength and use them to mimic stuff, I do things which I find fun, so maybe try to make a game out of it or something.

Glad you found something in it.

Unfortunately I am not super competitive, unless it’s something intellectual or based on some idea or theory I have conceived of belive it be true.

Those are the traits I have and leverage. You need to find what traits YOU have and leverage those. Start with all of your traits in the big five. Figure out the strengths and weaknesses inherent to your score and go from there. I found running them through chatGpt particularly helpful and interrogating it on my particular traits. Might work for you too.

Just curious you had this idgf attitude naturally or you developed it yourself?

I’ve been this way since my early teens, and probably before that too..

It was never a choice - I actually do wish i could care a little more..It would make life easier in some areas.

Believe it or not neuroticism and the internal alarm system that comes with it have their benefits..

Why do you think you have low neuroticm? Like you belive in your skills that you have developed over time so you know your future is sorted or you are just very present oriented and don't think about future at all?

Birth. Both my parents are pretty low in neuroticism, I’ve just inherited this trait to the extreme fsr..

Internally when things happen that alarm others, my brain just observes it without much of an emotional response. I have very little sense of urgency even when there is a clear threat to things i should value..

I observed pretty early on that what the average person feels at a 10 emotionally, i’ll feel at most a 4. I just have low arousal in general unless attached to a goal I’ve decided is important and even then it isn’t much..

Future wise. I have goals sure, and I achieve the ones I actually care about. But the future isn’t something I worry about (the future is barely real to me tbh, hard for me to conceptualize) i just know that whatever happens I’ll have to face it good or bad, sometimes it’ll go well sometimes it won’t. It is what it is. If i live I’ll be fine, If i don’t even less need to worry. Things always work out. I’m kind of a nutcase lol.

Edit: Now that I think of it I only conceptualize the future in context of my goals. Outside of that it is fuzzy and basically fictional.

Also, are you self employed or doing a job?
And hypothetical if you had responsibility of having employee under you and making sure business does well so atleast they don't suffer will you fulfil it or bail out?

Self employed out of necessity. I’m inherently unemployable. Usually jump from job to job when i was employed. Massive gaps on the resumé.. Work, stack money as quickly as possible, leave, live off stack, run out of stack, find new source of income, stack and repeat. I leverage my high openness to learn high value in demand skills and profit from that till the pay falls with demand..
Currently in the process of finding a source of income that is both sustainable & leverages my inherent quirks/abilities.

Employees??! I can’t think of anything worse than having employees. I’d probably do what I can on principle, if i decided it was morally interesting, but if the ship must burn it burns. I’ll find another ship or stick to dry land in future.

One weakness of my personality, wrt leadership is that i don’t care to take responsibility for others. It’s every man for themself in my world. Limits the depth of my relationships and cuts me off from the types of relationships most women inherently seek at some level.

In short..

Be careful of the traits you wish for empath..

Empathy and neuroticism have their value. Low conscientiousness too. Make it a priority to know yourself deeply and manipulate your personal reward system to achieve what you want and avoid/manage what you don’t..

Check out this quiz - it can help you find out what inherently motivates you.
I got adventure. Someting else to leverage on your path to success..

 

[Marty]

Why do you think you have low neuroticm? Like you believe in your skills that you have developed over time so you know your future is sorted or you are just very present oriented and don't think about future at all?

Neuroticism and time preference are two different things. If you’re going to use the Big Five model, may I suggest you read/watch a professionally prepared primer on it so that you really understand what each trait means, or follow topcat’s advice and use a large language model to find out more about them.

 

[Bill]

Some studies found meditation can reduce neuroticism and increase focus

Mindfulness training reduces neuroticism over a 6-year longitudinal randomized control trial in Norwegian medical and psychology students

Reducing neuroticism in young adults is likely to reduce future psychopathology and improve quality of life. One method of reducing neuroticism may be…

www.sciencedirect.com

Brief Mindfulness Meditation Improves Attention in Novices: Evidence From ERPs and Moderation by Neuroticism - PMC

Past research has found that mindfulness meditation training improves executive attention. Event-related potentials (ERPs) have indicated that this effect could be driven by more efficient allocation of resources on demanding attentional tasks, such ...

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

 

[Chase]

Check out this quiz - it can help you find out what inherently motivates you.
I got adventure. Someting else to leverage on your path to success..

Well darn, that's accurate:

Your primary motivator is Adventure!​

People with a need for adventure are motivated by risk, change, and uncertainty. They thrive when the environment or the work is constantly changing. They tend to like challenges and jump at the opportunity to be the first to do something new. They don’t mind failure, especially if given the chance to try again. High adventure people often go out on their own. They may be entrepreneurs, or free lancers. They are likely to change jobs and companies often, especially when they get bored or feel that they have “maxed out” their potential somewhere.

Adventure driven high performers want excitement and to be doing something new all the time. They want to be “first” and always on the cutting edge. Assign them new and difficult projects and assignments. They don't care that it's hard, and they don't care if the work isn’t perfectly defined. As long as it's cutting edge, and as long as it's new and it's different, then the harder the better. These individuals like change; they want to break up the status quo.

Adventure-drive people will go crazy when every day feels like every other day. They dislike doing work everybody else is already working on; it’s much more gratifying to be the first person to work on a project. Avoid assigning them repetitive projects or jobs or work that is predictable or too easy.

I wonder how many people are in the "adventure" camp. It's probably a minority, no?

Back when I was in the corporate world and I used to talk about my job with random people at bars and whatnot, I had this same conversation about a bajillion times:

HER: What do you do?​

​

ME: I have a business consulting job. It's not really that great. I have like 10 minutes of work a day and then have to spend the rest of the day trying to look like I'm awake while I nap at my desk.​

​

HER: Wow, that sounds great! You're so lucky! I wish MY job was like that!​

​

ME: Trust me, it's terrible. I can feel my brain crumbling apart from disuse in real time.​

Chase

 

[topcat]

I wonder how many people are in the "adventure" camp. It's probably a minority, no?

I’d say so yeah. I reckon affiliation and security make up the majority..

ME: Trust me, it's terrible. I can feel my brain crumbling apart from disuse in real time

Hilarious! I had this very conversation with a family member yesterday.

 

[empath]

I’d say so yeah. I reckon affiliation and security make up the majority..


Hilarious! I had this very conversation with a family member yesterday.

Mine did came as affiliation, i think it as a useless work style.

I used chatgpt, figured out one strength of mine its automating things or more like laying out mechanical steps for things and delegation. I can see them being useful in managerial position. Thanks for the idea. Need figure out how to use them to mimic a conscientious individual.

I am now quite sure i have adhd but i think its not genetic but environmental digged few books on it.

 

[empath]

Some studies found meditation can reduce neuroticism and increase focus

Mindfulness training reduces neuroticism over a 6-year longitudinal randomized control trial in Norwegian medical and psychology students

Reducing neuroticism in young adults is likely to reduce future psychopathology and improve quality of life. One method of reducing neuroticism may be…

www.sciencedirect.com

Brief Mindfulness Meditation Improves Attention in Novices: Evidence From ERPs and Moderation by Neuroticism - PMC

Past research has found that mindfulness meditation training improves executive attention. Event-related potentials (ERPs) have indicated that this effect could be driven by more efficient allocation of resources on demanding attentional tasks, such ...

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

I am practicing being more mindful in my day to day tasks and engaging in fully with all sense let's see where it goes. I confident it will bring positive results.

 

[Marty]

Check out this quiz - it can help you find out what inherently motivates you.
I got adventure. Someting else to leverage on your path to success..

Your primary motivator is Security!​

People with a high need for security look for continuity, consistency and predictability in their job, work, and pay. They are driven by guarantees and may prefer to stay with the same company, or in the same position or department, for the long haul. High security people get anxious over change.
High-security driven individuals love contracts, they love proof and they love history. They want to know that something has been done before, that it is a proven and predictable concept, and they want to see it guaranteed in writing. They want clarity. A fuzzy, “Well, we don't know exactly how you're going to fit into this team yet, but just come onboard and we'll figure that out as we go,” is not going to work well for people who are driven by a need for security. Provide these individuals with clearly defined job roles and duties and gain their buy in by providing lots of proof and history and guarantees and contracts. Let them know what is going to happen before they start so they feel confident that they’ve got a good chance at a homerun swing.
Security-driven individuals despise risk and rapid, unannounced change. These are not the people you want to pitch by saying “We don't know how this new initiative is going to turn out. It's going to be a little risky. Maybe it'll be huge and great and successful, or maybe it'll just totally blow up our faces, but that's the real fun. Let's live on the edge. Let's get that adrenaline rush.” These individuals want predictability. They want to know that a new initiative could be huge and that it's a homerun swing. But if it's only got about a 10% or 20% chance of success, they're not going to like that, and they're not going to buy in. Any rapid change, or highly destructive kinds of change just isn’t their thing.

Strange, I have changed employers 10 times since I began working in 1998. I’ve never stayed 5 years with the same company.