How to Stop Being Creepy?

Ken

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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So, I haven't been cold approaching girls. one reason for this is because I have creeped out girls in the past, one almost to the point of being reported to my college for sexual harassment.

And this semester, I learned that this girl that I was in the college newspaper with who graduated last semester said that she was running away from me. How? I didn't see that when she was still in the college. The guy who told me this went on two dates with her, and after the second date she reported him for sexual harassment. Twice. Well, only once. When she reported him the second time, she graduated the next day.

I have been diagnosed with Autism since i was thirteen months old. I learned this last week. So I have had trouble with facial expressions and body language.

So, I ask you: How do I stop creeping girls out?
 

HeartRipper

Space Monkey
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I have been diagnosed with Autism since i was thirteen months old. I learned this last week. So I have had trouble with facial expressions and body language.

So, I ask you: How do I stop creeping girls out?
Tyler (Owen Cook) has autism but he trained himself out of it. I think you can do the same by hardcore working on your fundamentals. Dressing better, being calmer, how you walk etc. The more value you have before you even start talking to a girl, the less she will be creeped out on approach.

Also, how were you approaching at campus? You can briefly state your movements, and the words you used.
 

JWS

Tribal Elder
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As a man, the most important quality you can have when with a female (or with anyone for that matter) is presence. Presence = being fully aware of both your own body and emotions and also of your surroundings, at the same time, but in a calm and relaxed state of mind.

Whenever I was successful in not watching porn online by myself, for at least several days at a time without watching it, I found my creepiness factor went down a lot, and my ease around women went up by a lot. I find that watching a lot of porn makes it harder for me to be present, but not watching increases my sensory perception and my comfort just being in any situation.
 

Ken

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Tyler (Owen Cook) has autism but he trained himself out of it. I think you can do the same by hardcore working on your fundamentals. Dressing better, being calmer, how you walk etc. The more value you have before you even start talking to a girl, the less she will be creeped out on approach.

Also, how were you approaching at campus? You can briefly state your movements, and the words you used.
I usually looked at a girl's face before deciding to approach her. Then, I would walk towards her, being by her side instead of being in front of her. Then I tap on her shoulder or lightly touch her arm. Sometimes I turned my head towards her before she turned her head towards me. Other times I waited until she turned her head before making eye contact with her. For the intro, I said, "Hi, I saw you walking by and I think you're cute." They would usually say "thanks", then I would introduce myself. The rest depended on the context of the interaction and how interested the girl is in my.
 

HeartRipper

Space Monkey
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I usually looked at a girl's face before deciding to approach her. Then, I would walk towards her, being by her side instead of being in front of her. Then I tap on her shoulder or lightly touch her arm. Sometimes I turned my head towards her before she turned her head towards me. Other times I waited until she turned her head before making eye contact with her. For the intro, I said, "Hi, I saw you walking by and I think you're cute." They would usually say "thanks", then I would introduce myself. The rest depended on the context of the interaction and how interested the girl is in my.
I think this is pretty standard. However, do not follow the old pick up method of "always open over your shoulder." I have honestly found that it doesn't really matter how you approach as long as you get the girl's attention and then get the interaction going. This is the goal of the first few seconds of your approach...to get the girl interacting with you. The goal is not to have the best approach. Enter however and then calibrate the interaction once you're in there.

I personally think your approach is normal and okay. Focus on increasing your value via fundamentals as more girls will be willing to interact with you on approach.
 

ElderPrice

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I usually looked at a girl's face before deciding to approach her. Then, I would walk towards her, being by her side instead of being in front of her. Then I tap on her shoulder or lightly touch her arm. Sometimes I turned my head towards her before she turned her head towards me. Other times I waited until she turned her head before making eye contact with her. For the intro, I said, "Hi, I saw you walking by and I think you're cute." They would usually say "thanks", then I would introduce myself. The rest depended on the context of the interaction and how interested the girl is in my.
Are all of these conscious decisions you've made before doing them? Or are these behaviors all instincts?

Also let me ask you this: How easily can you make guy friends? Like if I said 'walk up to that group of 3 guys and befriend them,' would you be able to do it? Would that be easy for you? Or nerve racking? How would they respond? Would they be smiling and would they respect you? Or would they be making that face like 'wtf who is this guy. get away from me.' ?
 

Ken

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Are all of these conscious decisions you've made before doing them? Or are these behaviors all instincts?

Also let me ask you this: How easily can you make guy friends? Like if I said 'walk up to that group of 3 guys and befriend them,' would you be able to do it? Would that be easy for you? Or nerve racking? How would they respond? Would they be smiling and would they respect you? Or would they be making that face like 'wtf who is this guy. get away from me.' ?
Before they were conscious decisions I've made before doing them, back when I was doing them for the first time. Now, they're instinctive behaviors. As for the other part, I wouldn't know how well I would do with walking up to a group of 3 guys and befriend them because I have never done that before.
 

Carousel

Chieftan
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As for the other part, I wouldn't know how well I would do with walking up to a group of 3 guys and befriend them because I have never done that before.
Seek out professional help. You will likely not be able to learn this from an internet forum and nobody here is authorized or trained to help men with severe social problems like these.
 

Ken

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Seek out professional help. You will likely not be able to learn this from an internet forum and nobody here is authorized or trained to help men with severe social problems like these.
I also have other social problems, such as not going out with friends outside of school. Do I need professional help for that?
 

Carousel

Chieftan
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I also have other social problems, such as not going out with friends outside of school. Do I need professional help for that?
Probably they are manifestations of similar underlying issues.
You should not study seduction before you have mastered these skills. Like befriending guys.
 
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Ken

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Probably they are manifestations of similar underlying issues.
You should not study seduction before you have mastered these skills. Like befriending guys.
Okay. Thank you. I was trying to study seduction for years before solving them, but recently I realized that I needed to solve these problems before I ever get good with women.
 

ElderPrice

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Before they were conscious decisions I've made before doing them, back when I was doing them for the first time. Now, they're instinctive behaviors. As for the other part, I wouldn't know how well I would do with walking up to a group of 3 guys and befriend them because I have never done that before.
Ah, but I didn't ask if you've done that exact, literal task before. With those questions I posed, I was trying to get a feel for your comfort level if you hypothetically were to try it.
 

abond0082

Space Monkey
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Seek out professional help. You will likely not be able to learn this from an internet forum and nobody here is authorized or trained to help men with severe social problems like these.
Yep You have to seek professional help so they can tell you what are you doing incorrectly, no one here can help.
 

suspicious5

Space Monkey
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As someone who's studied Autism, those are issues that'll unfortunately plague him his whole life. His brain is wired differently, and social situations are totally alien for him to the point he has to mechanize and can his responses and reactions. Reminder that Autism is a spectrum disorder so some can be on the more dysfunctional side.
 

Ken

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Ah, but I didn't ask if you've done that exact, literal task before. With those questions I posed, I was trying to get a feel for your comfort level if you hypothetically were to try it.
Well, I would be a bit more comfortable talking to a group of guys than I would be talking to a group of girls.
 
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