How would you handle this?

[DoWhatWorks]

TLDR My Question

How do you show a girl that “she’s losing you” in a way that doesn’t come across but hurt?

Context

So a girl I barely text on Tinder had a 1st date with me on Sunday at a park where she ended up at my place.

Good vibes, she’s touchy feely & very complimentary of me.

Despite this I get LMR where we’re half naked but she won’t take her trousers off even though her leg is literally shaking with horniness. We arrange a 2nd date

Date 2 (today)

Sexually open girl based on what she tells me but she gives LMR again. Using the excuse of period which I call BS on.

I used the following techniques:

- Freeze out & look bored on phone
(She commented that I seemed dissapointed)

- Say I only want genuine desire or nothing. She got hornier after this but didn’t seal the deal

-Choking & horny talk but didn’t seal the deal

She literally says if she takes her trouser off she’ll sleep with me so she refuses which makes me think I’ve been BF Zoned.


What I’m thinking of doing


Honestly not going to follow up with this girl and if she wants to see me she can hit me up. Have another girl I’m actively sleeping with and dates lined up so her behaviour just seems silly.

Any thoughts welcome

 

[Skills]

TLDR My Question

How do you show a girl that “she’s losing you” in a way that doesn’t come across but hurt?

Context

So a girl I barely text on Tinder had a 1st date with me on Sunday at a park where she ended up at my place.

Good vibes, she’s touchy feely & very complimentary of me.

Despite this I get LMR where we’re half naked but she won’t take her trousers off even though her leg is literally shaking with horniness. We arrange a 2nd date

Date 2 (today)

Sexually open girl based on what she tells me but she gives LMR again. Using the excuse of period which I call BS on.

I used the following techniques:

- Freeze out & look bored on phone
(She commented that I seemed dissapointed)

- Say I only want genuine desire or nothing. She got hornier after this but didn’t seal the deal

-Choking & horny talk but didn’t seal the deal

She literally says if she takes her trouser off she’ll sleep with me so she refuses which makes me think I’ve been BF Zoned.


What I’m thinking of doing


Honestly not going to follow up with this girl and if she wants to see me she can hit me up. Have another girl I’m actively sleeping with and dates lined up so her behaviour just seems silly.

Any thoughts welcome

I will link a bunch of post on things cause all of the above has been discuss to death.... ^ the way you handle some of the things were meh! But the major point is after 2 encounters if the lay is not there after so many negative loops (vs pureevil style of purposely delaying with 3 meets to set sexual frames, which does not involve a negative lmr rejection loop which is the whole point).... then your chances are pretty much super super low.... Which is why you do not want to get to this point.... I don't think you will lay this girl, but hopefully i am wrong, you don't want to be in those situations in the first place:

Transitions - When she is refusing advances of escalations try this...

so the girl refuse your advances lets say you are escalating and she lets you but she refuse to kiss you or she refuse _______ Fill in the blank on isolation... (could be via verbally or BODY language wise (like tilting head when you are going to kiss her couple of times) So the advice that...

www.skilledseducer.com

How to increase your chances if the lay is not there on the meet

Disclaimer.- this will be a long comprehensive post but it will totally help you big time, so read it and understand it... Most of the dudes including seducers are still living in the wrong century, or flat out they are not out there gaming or are pretty much kj, because i really don't...

www.skilledseducer.com

For those of you that hate or have a partner that hate period sex like me....

So guys i hate period sex, it smell like fish, i don't like the blood, i don't like the feel etc... not for me, i don't judge.... so for years when girls got the period i just had them give me bjs.... By the way if you want to field test i have NOT, for transparency you can do this with a...

www.skilledseducer.com

 

[TomInHo]

Hmmm

It sounds like she felt like you may judge her because she was on her period. Whenever I get the period objection I tell them...

"Don't worry baby, I'm a Man, and blood doesn't bother me at all. It's natural"

- Freeze out & look bored on phone
(She commented that I seemed disappointed)

I'm personally not a fan using of freeze outs with period objections. Makes most girls feel like you don't care about something that makes them extremely insecure and can hurt attainability

- Say I only want genuine desire or nothing. She got hornier after this but didn’t seal the deal

- Choking & horny talk but didn’t seal the deal

This means her objection was not a lack of arousal

She literally says if she takes her trouser off she’ll sleep with me so she refuses which makes me think I’ve been BF Zoned.

I had a girl respond like this to me recently. She was feeling insecure about having a hairy pussy due to her not shaving. Like you I thought it was complete BS, but gave her the benefit of the doubt.

Took a step back to build some comfort then began escalating again when she showed signs of loosening up. Ironically I also used choking and dirty talk into her ear and this got her screaming....

"You're getting me so horny. You're such a tease but I can't"

This made me believe her previous objection may have been real so I fell all the way back and qualified her on some things I liked about her. That seemed to get her to open up more but I decided to wrap up the date because I'm personally not a fan on excessive persistence, 2-3 strikes and the date is over

But before she left, I built more comfort around her objection and got her to show me videos about Brazilian waxes and Sugaring, then wrapped thing up by telling her to call me when she got herself ready.

Then a few day later, she reached out and I set a second date where we ended up fucking within 15 minutes of her entering my apartment. Her pussy was as smooth as Mr Cleans head

What I’m thinking of doing

Honestly not going to follow up with this girl and if she wants to see me she can hit me up. Have another girl I’m actively sleeping with and dates lined up so her behaviour just seems silly.

Any thoughts welcome

@DoWhatWorks I've been following your reports and guides, and man you got some skills. You've been on a roll lately, and you may not realize it but it's possible this girl may feel like you may have been out of her league, because your fundamentals, process and vibe are on point

So adding some empathy to this situation may have helped.

Because if you're right about her putting you in BF zone, it's not because she values you less, but because she values your opinion of her more

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Thanks for the resources as always @Skills

For the benefit of other people reading, I agree odds are lower but I’ve been in this position before and successfully got the lay.

Option 1: Pattern interrupt:With my first ex I was in this exact position and for the 3rd date I proposed a cute date to the zoo. She then came back to mine and I got no LMR as the comfort and connection had been built.

Option 2: Pattern interrupt: I sent a girl a text potentially ending things by saying “we may not be compatible as I like to let sparks fly and you seem more slow burn”. She agreed to end it then 1 week later she came over and slept with me


Option 3: Go silent and she realises she missed an escalation window & this guy won’t chase so she follows up with me

I’m not into her enough for option 1, so will either go with 2 or 3. Admittedly not used option 3 before but my patience levels are very low these days lol

@TomInHo I think your assessment was spot on. When she mentioned period I said in a blasé way “that’s fine, we’re both adults” which has worked for me in the past and shows it’s no big deal.

Lately “comfort” side of my game was on lock and increasing horny levels is how I break LMR but in this instance she needed the opposite.

She would often say “tell me a story” and occasionally “takes me time to open up” so what she actually needed was more deep diving, validation & connection.

All good though, lesson learnt & there will be more.

 

[Chase]

@DoWhatWorks,

I don't know what kinds of verbal resistance she was giving you.

But something I have used to good effect with LMR walls where the girl was saying she's "just not ready" or it's "moving too fast" is to tell girls, "I don't know, sometimes I feel like there's a really good connection, and both people really want each other, and then for whatever reason it just doesn't happen... and then without that connection, they just never really meet up again, and they just drift apart, and something that could've really been beautiful never happens."

Then just be quiet and let her process it for a moment.

Really what you are saying here is "if we don't shag I'm probably not gonna see you again" but in a much more romantic way.

If she tries to insist, "No, just because you don't do it the first time doesn't mean you can't see each other again," you just stay on the line and tell her, "I don't know, it's just been my experience that when two people want each other, and they are right on the cusp, and there's nothing that should stand in the way of the two of them being together, then they don't get together, it's like it just kind of dies. It's sad."

Of course the whole time you are also setting frames there that both of you want each other and there's really nothing that should be standing between you, and the two of you being together would be a beautiful thing... it would just be so sad for that to never happen... and if it doesn't happen now, it will probably never happen...

Chase

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Thanks @Chase I’ll be stealing that line. Not only does the vibe match my personality it’s also true

 

[Skills]

Thanks for the resources as always @Skills

For the benefit of other people reading, I agree odds are lower but I’ve been in this position before and successfully got the lay.

Option 1: Pattern interrupt:With my first ex I was in this exact position and for the 3rd date I proposed a cute date to the zoo. She then came back to mine and I got no LMR as the comfort and connection had been built.

Option 2: Pattern interrupt: I sent a girl a text potentially ending things by saying “we may not be compatible as I like to let sparks fly and you seem more slow burn”. She agreed to end it then 1 week later she came over and slept with me


Option 3: Go silent and she realises she missed an escalation window & this guy won’t chase so she follows up with me

I’m not into her enough for option 1, so will either go with 2 or 3. Admittedly not used option 3 before but my patience levels are very low these days lol

@TomInHo I think your assessment was spot on. When she mentioned period I said in a blasé way “that’s fine, we’re both adults” which has worked for me in the past and shows it’s no big deal.

Lately “comfort” side of my game was on lock and increasing horny levels is how I break LMR but in this instance she needed the opposite.

She would often say “tell me a story” and occasionally “takes me time to open up” so what she actually needed was more deep diving, validation & connection.

All good though, lesson learnt & there will be more.

Yes, me too, i have waited even a month, but my point is the chances and possibilities now a days go lower, i didnt say will not happen, cause you have one plus and is cause there was tons of physical escalation so due to that you may not fall in friendzone. Also, she may had have the period for real. I had girls i made show me blood cause i thought they were lying and they were not. I just dont like that negative loop to be develop as a pattern...

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Update:

Slept with the girl mentioned in the above post.

1) She wasn’t lying about her period

2) Post lay chat she said she wasn’t “mentally prepared last time” a.k.a womanese for not comfortable/don’t feel like I know you enough yet. Which means she needed more rapport

3) I basically went with option 1 outlined above.

She pinged me & invited me to a bar near her house to meet her room mates. My knee jerk reaction was to say no as my ego didn’t like the thought of being B zoned / a puppy being paraded to her house mates.

@topcat gave solid advice which was if you have the social skills to get her friend to like you... Go

Rest is history. I could of made this lay 1st time by being more empathetic and just “hanging out” to be more attainable as she was attracted.

May write a LR if I have time as there was some interesting lessons here.

Owe a lot to this forum, my date to lay conversion is something ridiculous this year like 70%. Slept with more girls by March then I did the whole of last year... It’s crazy

Onwards & Upwards

 

[TomInHo]

Update:

Slept with the girl mentioned in the above post.

1) She wasn’t lying about her period

2) Post lay chat she said she wasn’t “mentally prepared last time”

3) I basically went with option 1 outlined above.

She pinged me & invited me to a bar near her house to meet her room mates. My knee jerk reaction was to say no as my ego didn’t like the thought of being B zoned / a puppy being paraded to her house mates.

@topcat gave solid advice which was if you have the social skills to get her friend to like you... Go

Rest is history. I could of made this lay 1st time by being more empathetic and just “hanging out” to be more attainable as she was attracted.

May write a LR if I have time as there was some interesting lessons here.

Onwards & Upwards

Congrats on the lay man. Can tell this girl really likes you

 

[Skills]

Update:

Slept with the girl mentioned in the above post.

1) She wasn’t lying about her period

2) Post lay chat she said she wasn’t “mentally prepared last time” a.k.a womanese for not comfortable/don’t feel like I know you enough yet. Which means she needed more rapport

3) I basically went with option 1 outlined above.

She pinged me & invited me to a bar near her house to meet her room mates. My knee jerk reaction was to say no as my ego didn’t like the thought of being B zoned / a puppy being paraded to her house mates.

@topcat gave solid advice which was if you have the social skills to get her friend to like you... Go

Rest is history. I could of made this lay 1st time by being more empathetic and just “hanging out” to be more attainable as she was attracted.

May write a LR if I have time as there was some interesting lessons here.

Owe a lot to this forum, my date to lay conversion is something ridiculous this year like 70%. Slept with more girls by March then I did the whole of last year... It’s crazy

Onwards & Upwards

this is by skills:

Also, she may had have the period for real. I had girls i made show me blood cause i thought they were lying and they were not.

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Congrats on the lay man. Can tell this girl really likes you

thanks bro - appreciate your top notch advice too

this is by skills:

Also, she may had have the period for real. I had girls i made show me blood cause i thought they were lying and they were not.

Hahah you must be getting bored of being right so often huh

Also waiting to reach your level so I can refer to myself in the 3rd person too lol...