Hypergamy

seanmagy

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I remember Chase's article on hypergamy,it really makes sense,but well mayb in advanced societies where most people can afford a decent life....In Zimbabwe Africa where im from,because of poverty and all.most definitely women leave guys for men money..
 

Vision

Tribal Elder
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We're all hypergamous dude... women leave men for something better. Men leave women for something better... happens both ways, all the time.

I wouldn't get caught up in worrying about it. Focus on emotional relevance and making sure the woman you're with has solid morals and you should be fine.
 

seanmagy

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Yea thats obviously true.that post was something i just thought of,and its me pointing out to that article i read about hypergamy that yes women in from where im from are hypergamous,and leave guys for those with money..
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
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Most guys take the general opinion and consider that reality. Let me ask you, are you saying this from direct experience or just noting what you've heard?

Often times guys are surprised by what's possible. Even considering your area, I would still find it hard to believe that focusing on your fundamentals and learning about women, would not help to keep attractive women around.

Yes women want a good life, and a man with money might be able to provide stability. But men don't realize what women really want: a man that makes her feel like a woman.
 

seanmagy

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Yes.personally i have had 3 girls i was exclusive with leave me for some guy who had nore money than i had and that he had a car.so yea this is a direct experience with these women
 

seanmagy

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I have experienced this twice honestly,women leaving for better guys with cars and money.i dont know man its just something i experienced.

I also believe watchu saying about being an attractive guy to a woman n making women feel like women as a better strategy.but i just had to point out my truth
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
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Ok well that's good that you are relying on your own accounts for your perspective.

And it seems like you have a good attitude and are willing to step up in the ways you can. That's excellent.

The obvious (but perhaps not the most useful) thing to do would be to make more money.

But if you're not interested or unable to do that right now, the next step would be to examine deeper at what is going on.

Let me ask you this, have you been developing yourself and your game? Would you say that you have room to improve? And also more importantly, do you know what areas you personally should improve?

That last question is a biggie, because men have different situations and strengths/weaknesses to work with. If you nail down and work on your biggest sticking point, the biggest issue that you need to overcome, or the skill you need to develop most, you can improve your situation a lot.

This is the perfect place to ask questions to help figure out what that stickin point is, and ask questions about how to overcome it.

A lot of guys without game, but who have money, end up getting walked all over. Just because they "have a girlfriend/wife" doesn't mean he's enjoying it. Sometimes his balls and his cash are in her purse.
 

seanmagy

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I've been around G.C from Jan 2014.my game is quite solid to say the least.There are things obviously i can still improve on like being more vulnerable with women especially in r/ships..im not sure if thats the reason why they leave for guys with more cash or they mayb other reasons.

I will probably have to dig deeper on this,but currently with poverty this side girls prefer guys with money than those who dont..thats just my experience.
 

Lover

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As a guy with a great education and a great career upcoming, women have left me for guys with less education and perhaps less money too. And heck, I never owned a car and would often get a ride by exes. But when they leave me, I blame that on girls autorejecting me when they can't get what they want from me, not on the other guys being more on the girls' level in terms of social status. I hope one day that guys stop all this - seemingly wishful - thinking that money, career, cars etc. matter that much to most women. It can be helpful if you use it right - to create adventures and such. Almost every woman loves a good adventure because of the emotions, the thrill and the shared experience, not because of the money and the car on their own. A man with no money who knows how to go on such adventures with women is often way more valuable than the guy with money who doesn't do that.
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
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@seanmagy there are a TON of great relationship articles on the main site. GC is known for their game stuff, but the relationship stuff is solid as well. I would check those out if you haven't yet.
 

RedNeck

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This is redpill/ manosphere related post and it should be banned .
 

ulrich

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The point of the article was not that hypergamy doesn’t exist rather that it is not the unstoppable force red pill believers would have you think.

Would a woman leave you for someone better?
Yes, but:

a) Better is subjective.
b) There are dumping costs and benefits. Even if the alternative is “better”, you can keep the girl if the cost of dumping you is bigger than the benefit she gets.
c) People ultimately gather in social classes and tribes. If she goes for someone much “better”, she risks facing high dissimilarity and failing to secure a relationship.
 

ulrich

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Hard questions:

Are they really leaving you only because of money?
There’s really no other thing?
Do the women actually say “you’re poor, I need someone rich?”

How much more money do these guys have?
Is it realistic for you to get into that level?
Could this be not a lack of money but rather a lack of ambition in your part that make women look elsewhere?
 

seanmagy

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I agree to an extent with what everyone is saying.i dont feel like a victim of all this at all,and I'm still learning game.buy speaking from poor countries,thats definitely what i encounter where im from.

And to support what I'm saying.here when it comes to clubs,women dont go to meet a man to come home with. 90percent are prostitutes who wants to get paid.its transactional sex.
 

Yaxir

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That happens everywhere. Shrug. Our mission here is to get past the standard tropes and limitations most men face.

Instead of complaining about it, work on finding the next woman. All relationships have an expiration date.
Classy reply as always from Mike !
 

ulrich

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And to support what I'm saying.here when it comes to clubs,women dont go to meet a man to come home with. 90percent are prostitutes who wants to get paid.its transactional sex.

If that is true, why are you going to nightclubs, then?
 

Chase

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I will add that just based on what I have read about picking up in Africa, especially sub-Saharan Africa, unless you are going for European-Africans or Asian-Africans or middle+ class Africans money does seem to play quite a big role in things.

Naughty Nomad is an American(? I think?) guy who has chronicled his misadventures in that part of the world, and it's quite clear reading through his travelogue how big a factor money is there. Like @seanmagy, he also reports heavy amounts of prostitution, especially in the nightlife. He also uses the "most women are prostitutes" line, which you will also hear about poor SE Asian countries (Thailand, Philippines, etc.).


I haven't done sub-Saharan Africa, but I am familiar with SE Asia, and I have a bunch of friends who have lived in SE Asia extensively, and even the guys who start out pure 'game-only' guys eventually start mixing money into their game, then switch over to using money predominantly, simply because it is so much easier for them to get what they want with it there.

Another factor in less-developed nations is that women are actually harder to make 'love drunk'. There's a phenomenon in wealthier nations where love becomes a much more important factor in romantic couplings, for both sexes, and pair-bonds become harder to break. Women in poorer countries are much more practical.

If you've ever lived in a third world country and dated a woman from a poor background who believes you are also poor (I have), you know how brutal these women can be about money, even if you're doing awesome on every other metric in the relationship. You will never hear an end to the complaints about how other men are making so much more money than you and so on and so forth. It is really annoying. And I'm not talking gold diggers here! I'm talking frugal women with careful spending habits who don't dream of ever being rich. The gold diggers are obviously far worse.

....

Now, there are variables here I don't know and can't weigh in on re: the security of those relationships in Africa either. She leaves you for Richer Guy A... when Richer Still Guy B comes along, will she then leave Richer Guy A for Richer Still Guy B? Maybe!

I also don't know you, @seanmagy, and what your relationships look like. It might be that money is such an important factor there that it is totally overriding the pair-bond these women have with you, I'm not sure. Or it might be you are doing something wrong in the relationship that weakens the pair-bond to the point that women will escape when a guy offering a cushier life comes along, and you are seeing the effect but misidentifying that as the cause.

I can certainly say I've had plenty of guys tell me, "I keep losing women, and X is the reason," and I've spent all this time trying to help them figure out how to get around X, only to finally get a closer look at their relationships and realize X was not, in fact, the reason the relationships are ending at all, and instead the guy is doing or not doing something else entirely that is causing women to look around for a chance to eject.

I've been doing a lot more diagnosing of relationship issues with my GISS system lately, just for guys I know, and I think I might try to finally put my relationship product together, maybe late this year / early next.

I kinda would like to retire from making products myself, but it feels like that is one I should do before I hang up my spurs for good.

Anyway, that is just to say -- it isn't always the thing it seems like it obviously is when you're looking at "what is the cause of women leaving me repeatedly in XYZ situation?"

Sometimes it is. But a lot of the time, the obvious superficial reason is not the real driver of it.

Chase
 
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