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"I don't know."

Lord Byron

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 3, 2014
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40
Hey guys.

I'm in the midst of my first relationship with a woman, and have run it reasonably well from the start.

This is something that happened again today, and has happened a few other times since the beginning of this year since we got together, and it's her saying "I don't know."

I think I can tell the difference with when she says it when she really doesn't know the answer to something, but I get a little confused when she says it in a different kind of tone.

Like when she seems upset or agitated, and I ask her what's up, and she says "I don't know." This morning she even outright told me she was in a bad mood and I said "Why, what's wrong?", only to hear another "I don't know."

The thing is, I can't tell whether it's
1. I've done something wrong and she wants me to figure it out for myself
2. Something bad's happened elsewhere and she just doesn't want to talk about it and will only get annoyed by further probing.
3. She's just in a bad mood.

How do I tell the difference, and when I've figured that out, what kind of action should I take to deal with the situation? Should I just not continue the line of interaction to prevent her getting more frustrated, or do I persistently try to get her to spit out the issue?

Help much appreciated, thanks.
 

Franco

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
Messages
3,637
Lord Byron,

If she's acting upset or agitated, I think the best approach is always the persistent one that forces her to air it out. It's difficult to tell if it's just a "bad mood" thing if you let her stir in it.

It's the more difficult route to take if you aren't used to being dominant/angry with a woman in a relationship because it's going to feel out-of-place for you, but if you can learn to take this route and get a girl to air out her problems with you in a quick, decisive manner, she'll become much more attracted to you. I've found that many of the girls that I help like this get really kitten-like around me after they feel like I took the reigns and pushed through the rough patch to get to the source of the problem and resolved it. It's a strong, masculine way of dealing with things, and girls love that type of masculinity.

This all being said, Chase has a great article that does help you have some insight into what type of drama your girlfriend is giving you. I'd give it a read when you have some time!


- Franco
 

Franco

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
Messages
3,637
Moved this post to the "Relationships" board.

- Franco
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers
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