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I Feel Like Stop Dating Till I'm More Financially Stable

Troy

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 11, 2013
Messages
729
Hey bros

Ive been absent from the boards in a while now because Ive been busy working and going out on dates and with friends. Long story short, as my topic says I don't feel like dating anymore till I'm financially stable. Main point is Ive been on far too many dates that ended with me being disappointed. I do fairy well on dates these days that I could bang way more girls. The only problem is my and the girls logistics always suck. It's quite disappointing to after

Cold approaching / online gaming
Get the number and date
Go through lots of flakes
To getting the girls out
To doing good enough on a date

THAT SHE CLEARLY LIKES ME ONLY FOR ME TO NOT SEAL THE DEAL.. AKA FUCK EM.


Going on a date is no longer fun for me. You know the feeling as a kid when you want that cookie in the jar and Mom tells you " clean your room " and yet when you have done all that Mom changes her mind and says NOPE NO COOKIE FOR YOU ". Yeap that's right... Never happened to me. If I did clean my room I got the cookie.

Same with going on dates. If I follow the process and do well initially leading up to the date i expect and anticipatate the lays. I'm not getting the end goal as I'd like.

So my question is should I stop dating till I get my apartment/ house? I feel like I'm wasting my time and money going out when I could use that to build other areas of my life.

I am in a network marketing business and entrepreneurship programme so I'll still be meeting loads of people and I'll still be having one on one meetings with customers and business partners ( a lot regularly since that's what the majority of the business is). Point is I will still have a social life even if I stop going on dates. But should I? Can this hinder my future success when I have my own place? You've probably seen my posts ( field reports) where the date went well ( or okish ) yet I failed to close.

Thanks

Troy
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
Troy,

Make it short. I get back tmrw. Havent been responding to people and getting my priorities right.

Aaron Sleazy noted that most people waste their time on cold approach. With Chase's dating advices, it is far less taxing. I highly recommend making cold approach and social circles as staples.

Others like online dating? Lessen it unless you doing good. It is kind of like the Pareto principle where 80% of your results comes from 20%

To be good, one must immerse. Maximize your strength areas while also normalize your weakness.

Zac
 

Troy

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 11, 2013
Messages
729
Zac

Thanks for the reply.. What do you mean by make cold approach and social circle my staples? I assume it means focus on them a lot instead of online gaming.

And in a way, I agree, there are some guys who waste time cold approaching. Mainly because they didn't have the right mentality or advice to do well or the capacity to learn from their mistakes. To be honest I really believe that as a seducer we should look to set every part of our lives on track. Money, academic achievements, strength and skills and talents. I know the most effective seducers have these things pat ( good).

I just have been going on lots of dates and cold approaching using so much cash. I feel a better thing would be me getting my financial life on track so I can go on as many dates I want and know I have a good place to bring them back for sex.

Instead of being " that guy who breaks the bank going to clubs and going on dates and can't move forward in life ".

I don't want to be the guy who only has validation from " dating ". So should I stop dating for now and put all that time into my financial life? Then again I don't want to stop dating and end up having to learn all this game two years from now . What should I do?

Troy
 

Lawliet

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 8, 2015
Messages
206
Staples as in little parts of your life perhaps?

Not the master piece (your life) itself but only staples that supplement it.

For me, i'd say keep it up, just don't spend (or contain it).
I'll only spend 20$ today or so. Then do that. And keeping going out, going out with girls, and once you reach the limit, make the dates as free as possible.
Or if you're good, get her (naturally) paying for you. By the way, Chase does it too (against his preference).

Lawliet
 

Drck

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Feb 14, 2013
Messages
1,488
We all work for reward. Many people tell you that the go to work and they like it. As soon as they finish telling you that BS, they go and buy lottery ticket, hoping they they never have to work again... So it is all lies, most people don't like to work at all, we just have to in order to survive, to pay bills...

Who wants to get up in the morning, go to work, deal with assholes, pretending that you are a cool and easy going guy so you don't get fired for your opinions, doing useless things that others tell you to do with a smile on your face, make lots of money for the company - and at the end of the month barely pay your own bills? You'd have to be a fool to like it, it is insane...

You go to work, you do some stuff, and your reward is salary. That's why you do it. It is of course difficult if you work hard and you don't get the right compensation for it, it makes you want to work less, or not at all.... You get disappointed and you quit... Why work hard for no reason?

IMO your approach to seduction is the same. You perceive it like work: I approach, I go through flakes, I go for a dates, I spent money that I don't have - and I don't get laid anyway, there is no reward at the end... So why do it?

The whole attitude has flaws in it. You can't work for rewards in seduction. She knows right away that you are only doing it for rewards (just so you get laid), thus she puts her breaks on...

Learn to have fun instead, learn outcome independence. Go out, talk to girls, have fun, and expect - Nothing. It doesn't matter whether you get laid or not.

See, this is much better approach - you do that get anxious, you really can't be rejected, you are not really "working", you are not getting disappointed when she says No... You are simply having a fun regardless of the outcome... This attitude actually increases your chances because she doesn't feel obligated to "pay you back for your work" with sex, she's just having fun as well...
 

Troy

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 11, 2013
Messages
729
Lawliet I'll take your advice into consideration. I usually spend $20 per outing ( taxi, bus fare, my food, venue entrance for myself ).

Drck , I really like the way you write posts. This advice you gave made me think. You ever consider writing articles for girls chase lol? What stood out to me was the part about expecting nothing. In some way I agree. What I don't like about that is the impression it gives in a bad way. Which guy would want to be going on dates every weekend and not get even a kiss ? I have been going on dates almost every week and it used to be fun until I get used to it. I don't want to spend so much time going out with all these girls and can't get laid....the only thing stopping me is my logistics.

These girls I'm taking out, most of them like me and the vibe I get is they would go home with me ( if I ONLY COULD) but then I don't and attraction expires. Then by the third date they get cold and stop answering my texts and calls and some even delete my number...ALL BECAUSE I DIDN'T ACT WHEN THE IRON WAS HOT

That's not encouraging me to continue dating. I don't see the fun in doing friendly chit chat for 2 dates or 3 only to end up back with no interested girls in the end. :/

Troy
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
Hi Troy,

Troy said:
Thanks for the reply.. What do you mean by make cold approach and social circle my staples? I assume it means focus on them a lot instead of online gaming.

Whoops what i mean here is some people are better in social circles, like Aaron Sleazy. Which is why he made social circles his staple. For me, going to events and socializing, meeting people and also working is my staple.

So find what you get at and make it take more of your time than let's say, online gaming. It doesn't affect you so badly if you get rejected in online game. For online gaming people, focus on that more while also cold approach as side. My cold approach is about 1 out of 30 to 40, should be more. Numbers can be gotten but it usually fades. So better to always instant date, no joke. Fast is better.

Listen to Mr Amante. ;)

Troy said:
I just have been going on lots of dates and cold approaching using so much cash. I feel a better thing would be me getting my financial life on track so I can go on as many dates I want and know I have a good place to bring them back for sex.

I think the problem here is mindset. Early on, i needed to spend because i FEEL. The thing is women don't care. Just don't go to a restaurant or something expensive. A girl who doesn't like you will insist on food and ask you to pay.

Yes, that's her way to tapping into her own female nature of doing things, although she does not necessarily sleep with you.

Troy said:
Instead of being " that guy who breaks the bank going to clubs and going on dates and can't move forward in life ".

There are always guestlist. Come early and be generally nice to people there. Some will be reserved. Some will be good to you. At the end of the day, pick a time where you already have lunch and dinner and you only need to spend time instead. 20 years of brainwashing on how you need to spend, can be hard to break.

Troy said:
I don't want to be the guy who only has validation from " dating ". So should I stop dating for now and put all that time into my financial life? Then again I don't want to stop dating and end up having to learn all this game two years from now . What should I do?

You never be a millionaire next week. I posted a Daymond John video, a guy worth 250 million. You should check out the first three minutes. If it bothers you, just slowly lessen your time on what you think doesn't work, like cold approach, and try do social circles and focus on it.

Zac
 
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