I Hate My Sex Drive

[Rage]

Maybe I’m not being appreciative enough but this has been kind of bugging me and I had to write about it.

My sex drive and testosterone levels are really crazy out of control. I wrote about it before.

Basically I have to have an orgasm a day (now it’s like 2 a day) to stay sane and not go crazy and to be able to sleep. I’m not sure what happened but my levels have spiked higher in the last 3 months.

I thought that it might be because of supplementing vitamin d3 or amino acids in my protein but have gone lengths without them and they’re not it. Honestly I’m not even sure how much it is my training because I have always trained rather hard.

It may be because of my training and that the test levels of a guy repping 300 lb squats needs to be higher than the guy repping 200 lb squats, or something like that. And the crazy adrenaline and elevated testosterone from the workouts might help it.

But it’s just me too (my one or two powerlifting friends who are at or above my level aren’t crazy fucking nymphos). I turned 21 in June; have been talking to girls more now alongside the powerlifting and this additionally seems to spike my levels considerably high.

Porn and Masturbating

I have tried unsuccessfully to quit jacking off (is that even possible), and what happens is that my body will fall asleep and then wake up at like 2 or 3 or 4 am. I’ll feel like I have a ton of energy and my mind can’t rest and like I have to pee really bad and am heavy down there.

If I don’t have a good orgasm I won’t be able to go to sleep. It isn’t about doing it before bed either but just doing it during some point of the day so that my levels are a touch more relaxed later in the day.

I have tried quitting porn, but when I masturbate without porn I don’t orgasm nearly as I much as needed to get my levels rested enough to be able to sleep soundly through the night.

…

I should mention that I never jerk off cause I want to, but always because I need to, to be able to sleep and get normal.

I am pretty certain I don’t have porn addiction, because I don’t get anything out of it, don’t enjoy it much and can forgo it completely if I have someone to have sex with (when I am having sex regularly with them). The problem ends up though that I wouldn’t be able to have a girl to have sex with like 5 times a day which would be ideal for me.

I am used to walking around and functioning with truly (in my opinion) ridiculously elevated levels of testosterone (there is an energy off me that girls can smell off me and guys can notice off me and back off/turn more beta around me).

I’ll only jerk off once or twice in a day, but should have the levels to do that stuff 7 times a day easily at least. That never happens though because honestly I have a lot of trouble getting off on porn.

I’m not into it much, am bored by it; everything I watch is the most vanilla basic porn (seriously vanilla; lmao I learned what hentai was for the first time from my friend discussing it day before yesterday... I used to think that was the asian girl category), and more of the time I’ll just pretend like I’m having sex or something. I don’t think I’m really especially visually stimulated.

My Problems With It

I’ve read a couple studies that sort of coincide with my theory that there are some guys that just have a crazy fucking sex drive and not really any sort of porn addiction as much as a constant need to get off.

Perhaps it affects my memory or willpower or something? But if so I’m not really aware of it…

I would like to kick it altogether if there were a way that I could sleep through the night or regulate my levels better.

What bugs me about this is the principle of it. I think I haven’t been at least a few months now without orgasming at least once in a day.

The principle f it bugs me; I can’t go like a single day without having to fucking get off. Its not in my mind as it is in my body: I just feel fucking hard all the time.

In the past couple months I’ve been to a friend’s grandmothers funeral and been sad and moruning with friends and family and also virile and half hard there (and other places where its like the last place youd want to be and you’re like man I have a fucking problem).

I went home a couple of weeks ago to spend the night with family, and slept next to my dad because my mom went to Bangladesh. I trained hard that day talked to girls that day, and still sure as hell (I’m like fuck this is fucking ridiculous) I am hard and in desperate bodily need of orgasm, and its like 5 am and I cant sleep to save my life.

Possible Solutions

If you look for possible solutions you either get guys in one camp saying masturbating is super fine super healthy and natural and do it and enjoy it. Don’t be obsessed/why would you want to quit and all that shit.

Then on the other end you get the idiot nofap guys who are like oh man I’m on day 42 and 3 girls looked at me today, yes its working !!

I’m not burdened that much by the supposed porn addiction or the inability to function or do work or be productive. It doesn’t have that much effect on that I think, doesn’t appear to be this way; I’ve been jacking off at least once every 3 days since I was like 12 and still have gotten a few things done in my life.

What bugs me is the principle of it and my body being dependent on not porn or masturbating per se but dependent on this need to orgasm regularly throughout the day. If there were a way I could meditate or calm myself better and relax my levels in some way healthily or naturally better than I would prefer that.

It bugs me because it doesn’t take over my life but it is something I cant forget about; I’ll go a whole day working on various things hanging out with people working out talking to girls going to class etc.

I won’t have urges much and am used to operating at dangerously high levels (in ways feel like a lethal weapon because I think Id fucking kill someone without meaning to if I got into a fight).

But come end of the day if I forget to do it at least some point then my sleep will be fucked my body will be alert and awake and just almost full horny from nothing and I’ll have to go and do it.

:/

So am looking for any suggestions or thoughts or ideas if anyone has any. It hasn’t been affecting my abilities with girls much either I think, I have a lay report to type up next.

Only solution I can think of is meditate or supplement somehow to better sleep and go a few days so that levels somehow balance? Or as I joked with my friend, get a slave girl who I can stow away in a closet and fuck throughout the day and feed her little snacks out of my pantry.

That seems like the most lucrative idea I have so far.

-Rage

 

[Zoro]

Hey Rage,

Sounds like an uncomfortable situation. Meditation sounds like a solid idea. You might want to look into herbs that relax. Passion flower is one I've been looking into trying for better sleep.

I get keyed up a lot too and am horny all the time. I actually have seen that frequent masturbation just aggravates the horniness, the body probably becomes used to regular stimulation. I use deep breathing and meditation to calm myself down. This is even if I am walking around or doing an activity, just focusing inward on the feeling tends to dissipate it and help bring insight to its origins.

I got rid of anxiety from eating cleaner. All organic and tons of vegetables and good fats (animal fats included) and cut out all processed foods. I don't even drink water unless its spring water that hasn't touched plastic. I may be a freak, but now any type of anxiety or hyper energy is easily manageable and rare.

Hope you find a way to control that raging boner Rage. I couldn't pass that one up. But seriously.

PS that spring water thing is pretty important. Your body uses trace minerals to help switch back and forth from sympathetic to parasympathetic modes (fight or flight to rest and relaxation). And plastics that leach into water mimic estrogens and other hormones that really fuck with you (throwing off normal hormones processes, many of which are needed for relaxation and sleep) . Xenohormones they are called. Tap water has a lot of fun goodies in it too.

 

[Zoro]

I buy a 5 gallon glass jug from Mountain Valley Water.

http://mountainvalleyspring.com/

The website has a store locator. Its a big ass jug, the 2 and half gallon one is easier to pour. I pour the 5 gallon one into a pitcher and treat it as a workout haha.

That water is the shit. I call it magic water.

Just a side note about that advice. I have given that advice to some of the girls I have dated to great success. A girl I am currently seeing cleared her skin up drastically and her hair looks luscious as fuck. It almost became a problem because I started to become way too attracted! I also helped her embrace her femininity whole heartedly and everything from her posture and smile to her behavior in bed has become more attractive. It's seriously worth looking into, I eventually want to get a deep enough understanding to share more of that stuff with you guys.

I learned a lot of the nutrition stuff from Weston Price (website/organization) and masculine-feminine dynamics from The Way of The Superior Man (book). The book might be helpful in channeling the excess energy for you, Rage.

The compulsive part of it and a need for porn is what I would worry about. I think porn is dangerous, masturbation is healthy. Just my thoughts

I agree with Radeng. And you mentioned that too.

I do think that some people handle their ejaculations differently. Call me a nofap idiot, but if I cum too frequently I feel run down and get all sorts of benefits from conserving my cum. On the other hand, I have a friend who masturbates regularly who is a machine of a man. If everyone else runs on batteries, he's plugged into the wall. Its not a black and white answer.

 

[Rage]

Hey guys thank you this is immensely helpful

Sounds like an uncomfortable situation. Meditation sounds like a solid idea. You might want to look into herbs that relax. Passion flower is one I've been looking into trying for better sleep.

I’ll have to look into this! I was on my way to buy some melatonin and trying to supplement with that. Something to relax me would help.

I’ve learned very basic meditation but have to practice it more routinely and/or try other forms of it I think.

I get keyed up a lot too and am horny all the time. I actually have seen that frequent masturbation just aggravates the horniness, the body probably becomes used to regular stimulation. I use deep breathing and meditation to calm myself down. This is even if I am walking around or doing an activity, just focusing inward on the feeling tends to dissipate it and help bring insight to its origins.

This sounds correct yes, I think my it does feel like it aggravate the horniness and my body gets more conditioned to it and used to it. I remember being able to (6 months ago or a year plus ago) go several days without doing it and feeling any difference. I could quit porn and masturbating for 3 days and be ok.

Maybe it is bullshit but maybe some part of it is true (and some part of me within me feels that it is true), but I remember feeling more focused having more willpower having it be a lot easier to do things when I would be at that end of 3 or 4 days without porn/masturbation.

I like the substitutes/suggestions on the spring water and organic food J wick. I go through close to a gallon of water a day, but it is just basic filtered water (I never tried switching for only spring water, will have to try it).

I have almost no processed foods in my regular diet eat brown rice lean meats lots of vegetables and among them much of it is organic. I want to lean it up further and further down the road hwoever, and eventually go full organic, try this spring water switch, eventually get to organic meats or grassfed only.

And cut out the two or three tie a week cheat fast food I eat.

Curbing fast food isn’t very hard for me because I don’t like it much; but sweets are a bit tough. Still everything is pretty infrequent with that because I set the ruleof not keeping any of it in the house. So I don’t and only will eat it once a while if I’m out. Can cut it even further past htat I think.

Aka some men with high levels of testosterone do not have above average libidos and low testosterone men can have normal libidos, you are right that they are linked tho. Just curious have you had your hormones tested, is that why you believe your testosterone is high? Or is it just your libido and lifting and aggression that lead you to believe that?

I would have never known this Radeng, never made that connection! I have a friend who I lift with who is like a really devout Christian and waiting till marriage to have sex. And he has crazy strength, I think he might be a guy who has higher testosterone levels than me (he squats 500+ lbs now and only ways 25 lbs more than me). He says he doesn’t watch porn because he is religiously against it; and doesn’t masturbate much either.

Perhaps he really doesn’t.

I haven’t been tested but would like to be; I’ve had high levels in the past seen it through how competitive, and aggressive and high libido I am. But lately it is even more, and all signs point to it.

My balls (maybe tmi but whatever) for example are enormous look really oversized and shit. My energy is really high strung and ungrounded.

I definitely have to meditate more.

And you know what I think the porn contributes negatively too. I believe it is possible to cut it out and I believe I want to.

The sleep is what stops me; I realize too that my sinuses open up and that becomes my excuse to get off more too. That compulsive part what you mention is very true.

…

High testosterone levels would be awesome, would be godly if I could balance them properly. This will be very hard to figure out and work to do, but anything worth achieving is, isn’t it?

I love it very much, if I can just balance it. I wish I could go a week or a few weeks without porn and masturbating. Find a way to meditate and channel my masculine energy in some way where I don’t have to.

I think of scientists and conquerors and shit of history and it occurs to me that yeah they probably weren’t jacking off all the time and had ways to balance it. Advice on this topic is irritating because of the dogma people associate with it. It’s all by nofap guys and religious idiots and that pisses me off.

You guys have given me the best advice towards this yet, so thanks a lot. I have some places to start and I know that I want to curb this, and yeah it is an addiction.

Even if it is just once or twice a day. Thinking about it more, I think it has affected willpower creativity, drive, and all that a bit. Perhaps it has been affecting me my whole life and I am unaware of potential that I am killing as a result of that.

This sex drive can end up one of biggest strengths then or one of my biggest inhibitors.

 

[Rage]

[double posted... ignore this lol]-

 

[Rage]

Just thought Id mention that I'm fairly certain that this is just a case of porn addiction and nothing to do with testoerone levels.

I journaled about it in my journal here viewtopic.php?f=15&t=12136

I've been reading the art of manliness's series on porn and how to quit as well as why it has the draw to men that it does. It turns out that testoerone levels really have nothing to do with it at all.

This is an absolutely awesome set of articles by the way. My goal is to fully quit porn and fully qut masturbating. It will be extremely difficult but I want to do this. http://www.artofmanliness.com/2014/10/0 ... quit-porn/

The probelm isnt testosterone it is dopamine. You create a pattern (which is different for different guys and is factored on location, time, emotional mood, other poeple, and preceding activity) and then go to porn and then get your orgasm adn dopamine is released into your system.

The more you do it the stronger the connections become in your brain. The more dopamine is released(which btw sexual release is numebr one releaser of dopamine). THen you need more novelty too to further go and get high levels of dopamine release, and you jsut fall increasingly more into thiss poisonous cycle.

I know this is a topic that peopel are ashamed to talk about, and that whaatever you admit to even to other people, your own problem will tend to be a little bit worse than that. But just thoguht Id mention that yeah this is the problem at hand, I really want to kcik this bad habit and do w hat it takes to do so. It has taken away a ton from my life and willpower creativity motivation energy etc. could be tons more without it.

The problem isnt sex drive at all. Ive been doing a ton of research the last couple of days; there are guys ons teroids with godly levels of testoerone who dont have sex or jack off or look at porn. I'd be the first to be skeptical of this shit btu from my research and from first hand expereinces lately, I think that this is possible and can be true. What the articles talk about really help and further confirm my theories. Want to fucking quit this shit, and i think it will imrove my life over all. Hope so at least; these are my conclusions on the issue so far.

Cheers,

RAge

 

[Mr.Rob]

Idk Rage from what you say it sounds like regardless of your porn addiction you still have a really high sex drive (as mentioned when you can't sleep or function until you orgasm).

Regarding your porn addiction... well addictions die hard as fuck.

Good luck my friend!

 

[Lotus]

Rage,

I'm in agreement with Rob that you seem like you have a really high sex drive. So going from porn and mastribation daily to nada might be rough.

Curious, have you tried just mastribating without porn?

Not sure your personality on quiting things cold turkey vs weaning off, but it might be a way to slow down the porn addiction without the mood affects of cold turkey.

-Lotus

 

[Rage]

Thanks for the thoughts guys!

I think I do have a high drive sure; but I also read a lot and have been thinking a lot about how porn and masturbating even once a day was taking away from my life.

I have had way less willpower and motivation and have been more zombie like… and thinking about it further I think this dates back really really far.

I hesitate even saying anything about the topic too much in the case that my mind gets on the topic and thinking about it and stuff; doing it without porn should be possible… I’ve tried it before and couldn’t do it (couldn’t even to pictures) which kind of shows that the problem has regressed to where I need novelty of video to even get off.

The road to quitting from what I hear, is tough and when you want to break it, you should go and try masturbate first without porn instead of porn + masturbate; because porn is the worse of the two evils.

But I really want to quit because of everything I read and realizing how it applies to myself. I realize I have been working with a fraction of the potential I have… and that there are professional lifters I know of who do go full abstinent who have crazy levels much higher than me.

I was having less desire to talk to girls but just a couple days off of masturbating and porn and it is crazy how much I want to talk to girls and bang girls. Just in my day today without even approaching I’ve talked to and locked eyes with so many girls; and the difference in my virility and their attraction and my fundamentals is significant. I’m fucking looking at even ugly ass girls and thinking what it would be like to bend them over and rail the fuck out of them.

I think of it this way guys: that if the only way you could ever get off again were to do it through women, then How fucking much then would you want to go and bang girls then?

A crazy ton… this reason amongst a whole host of other pluses just makes me really want to do this.

I feel revulsion and hatred for porn and self stimulation feel like it’s taken years of my life; and that the high levels I want to get to will need me working to beat this.

Have been figuring out some things for my sleep too; I’m not sure that the having to nut iss the main thing affecting my sleep. Think all the creatine I was on was contributing more to it, making me have to either get up at night to drink water or get up at night to pee… this shit is tough as hell but I don’t believe in failure. Only progress and feedback. So we’ll see how this goes and helps me in the future.

Rage

 

[Zoro]

Rage,

Right on with that attitude. If you persevere, you will prevail a stronger man and have the valuable experience of kicking a habit no longer doing you any good.

Since I had been struggling with my own porn addiction and have been making steady progress with cutting it down, I want to share some of my experiences.

For one, I feel a huge drop in energy and mental function from frequent masturbation and feel a regaining of inspiration, motivation and mental clarity from abstaining masturbation. I had been a pussy timid teenager and I think frequent porn and masturbation was a big part of that.

I feel like a new man, more like the man I am supposed to be, when I conserve my ejaculations. I don't count sex because for some reason it doesn't result in the same drop in energy. That could be because I have less access to sex than internet porn and haven't gotten to the same frequency of ejaculations with sex alone. Regardless the more I conserve the more I have to spare.

I feel many of the benefits discussed here http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf when I abstain from PMO. The benefits continue for many many weeks. The longest I have gone is almost 2 months. I swear every time I go a long period amazing things happen. Towards the end of the longest stretch I went with out porn oddly coincided with a sudden opportunity for my band to go on a two month tour across the country. I'm not sure if I would have been able to do it had I been ejaculating frequently. I met a gorgeous blond right before we left and kept her as a fuckbuddy when I returned, I also approached boldly as fuck on tour and laid a cute little asian in the van. After tour I started up PMO again and fell apart.

Personally, that link of listed benefits was the most motivating thing to quit porn I have come across. I hope it inspires you too.

Great that you understand dopamine's role in addiction. I want to add to that. I was going to explain this myself but just check it out here.http://www.feedtherightwolf.org/2010/11/brain-chemicals-in-healthy-sexual-act/

Lastly, one of the most harmful aspects of porn addiction for me was the burden of guilt and negative self feedback. Don't salt the wound. Its a difficult and complex situation. I have since reframed the experience as a good one. In fact, it has made me a stronger and more knowledgable man, as difficulties will do. I've gained experience in overcoming a very powerful addiction. This is useful for me in many ways, especially because I see myself becoming a life coach and healer. I hope you can find similar solace and positivity in your own situation, and I already see that you have a great attitude about it.

You've got this and we've got your back
-JW

 

[Rage]

Hey thanks for the thoughts and support jwick! It's awesome to hear that you've done this already and cool to read up on these benefits you listed and the others described.

It has been going awesome; and will continue to be so I expect.

Will keep updated likely in my journal

Cheers

Rage

 

[Rage]

I feel like I am going fucking crazy holy crap. I guess this is an update of sort if you wanna call it that.

I think it has been a week now looking at this thread. Not sure; maybe six days. Does it fucking matter… not sure but I haven’t been keeping count at all.

My work to quit porn and masturbating wasn’t that hard I just didn’t do it, started supplementing melatonin and using that to help me go to sleep and get out of the habit of relying on orgasm. The first couple days my brain was like adjusting, but I got a lot more done more willpower, energy, creativity, put on strength too I think though I can’t completely prove it.

Of these days I weight trained heavy like 5 days of them. I got home from my workout today and tried to take a nap because was so worn out but fucking couldn’t and meditated for 10 minutes but then even then I got my body calm but my balls were still heavy and shit.

My balls! they have gotten fucking enormous and bigger than ever. They look like the balls of a bull or some similar animal now… really hot or really gross I guess (beauty is in the eye of the beholder)

I think it has been 7 days; if so this is the longest I’ve gone in my whole life tied with the week where I had to go to Hawaii with my parents for a week. I didn’t lift at all during that time so this has been the most/hardest.

Don’t think I could have been able to do it without popping melatonin each night cause honestly I don’t know how the fuck I would’ve been able to sleep these past days otherwise.

Last night I couldn’t sleep much; then I woke up in the morning took a 5 hour energy (my first source of any caffeine at all in 3 months) and had a workout. It wore off, got tired, but wasn’t able to sleep.

…

So

I fucking have to bust somehow, I realize that. I’ve met anatman and I feel horny as hell and urging to do 50 approaches a day like him. I think I’ll need to go out and do something like that or some friends with benefit I can have when I’m hurting for it or both. I’m still waiting on my ID to come in the mail, otherwise I think I’d be doing nights 3 nights a week.

What I’m wondering about and I’m not sure about, is that will it be like a certain day that I have to get through like day 7 or day 8 that my brain cools off and I don’t have to bust anymore and can chill and its easier?

Its possible that I reachthat threshold but then the powerlifting brutal workouts spark me back up/add more load to the fucking ball bag. I tell myself that that day is today and have been telling myself that the last couple of days (get through today and youll be good). I’m not sure if that’s even true or not.

Fuck I am going fucking crazy; I was about to watch porn and jack off right now out of desperate urge/need to just orgasm. Then I looked at the porn and couldn’t even get hard immediately; then caught myself getting really fucking pissed off. Then I shut it off and forced myself to go to the library where I’m writing this right now.

This problem solves itself easily if I have any kind of mltr or fuck bud or someone to do regularly (or if I could go out and get laid any week when I wanted) but I don’t have that right now.

I think I might have to go and fucking do it today… my ego and stubbornness doesn’t want to. Pisses me off to think that I’m fucking human and that I have to orgasm once in a while,. But fuck can’t think of any other solutions any more right now. Have done a lot of sex transmutation the last few days but not sure if that or anything else will help right now.

I’m a couple of days past the phase now where my caveman ancestor would’ve went out and fucking raped a girl by now. If I had sex with a girl now I’d be really scared id get her pregnant; or if I wanted to finish on her id have to tell her to stand on the other side of the fucking room or something.

At last I’m not addicted to porn or caught up in the habit of it anymore. And know that I can go a week off at a time if I choose to or something.

But still; bugs me that I can’t be fucking perfect at this. I guess the road to fully getting off it, this is expected and won’t happen quickly cold turkey or anything.

Likely I’m gonna fucking go jerk off a swimming pools worth in a little bit.

Well its been a good week I guess :/

Hope the next week goes well too; things will change when I have the ability and free time (i.e. not finals time) for me to go and fucking meet a ton of girls every single day when I’m in heat like this. I could make the right ltr girl a crippling sex addict right now…

Cheers fuck haha let me know what you guys think, you guys are the best

Rage