FR I left her better than I found her

[SparklingWadah]

Goal​

I am working on adding sexual intent and making conversation less boring.

1. End sentences with a downward inflection
2. Tease girls within 30 seconds
3. Look for opportunities to get off boring conversation by shifting to a emotional topic

Per my recent Field Report I am working on writing down my conversation and teasing more.

Outing​

Today I opportunistically approached when I visited a downtown area for lunch at work. In the afternoon I visited a shopping center and then a grocery store to do daygame. There weren't tons of people out but there were still enough solo girls to approach.

Approach 1​

I see a girl reading alone at a bench outside a bookstore. I was with some coworkers and wasn't planning on approaching yet, but this looked like a good opportunity and I felt like I needed to act. I waffled a bit about it but eventually walked over and said hello.

Spoiler: Conversation

Me: "Excuse me."
Her: "Hi?"

Me: "Hi. I just saw you sitting down and reading over here, and I thought that you looked incredibly pretty today..."
Her: "Oh, thanks"

Me: "...and I wanted say hello."
Her: "Hi"

Me: "What's your name?"
Her: <Introduces herself>

Me: <Introduces myself>. "How are you doing today?"
Her: "Good"

Me: "I love this necklace you've got going on...is it like, your thing, or....like did you make that?"
Her: "Oh no, not at all."

Me: "Okay. Well, what are you reading today?"
Her: "It's a book I picked up in there." <Gestures to book store>

Me: "Big reader?"
Her: "Yeah, when I have the time..."

Me: "Very nice, very nice...well, nice to meet you, I have to go catch up to my coworkers. Have a nice day."

Takeaway: I got nervous because I separated from my coworkers to approach her and it was an unfamiliar situation. They saw me approach the girl and were curious. I tried to be nonchalant about it, didn't know the right way to react.

She wasn't giving me a lot of signs of interest, however I also did not lead the conversation well. I could have teased her with something like "Ah, don't tell me...50 shades of gray?" when asking what she was reading. I could have saved the necklace comment when asking for compliance to examine it. I could have screened her on reading with something like, "So are you a curious person? Do you like learning new things?" I also could have touched a bit on her motivation for reading, like if she enjoyed escapism or if she's more of a nonfiction person.

Approach 2​

I see a cute girl walking perpendicular to me, who seems to look in my direction briefly and then quickly pull her head back to looking straight forward. I guess this is a approach invitation so I catch up. She is looking to the side at a glass building (and may have seen my reflection as I hesitantly caught up) and open her, and she gives me a blank look and a thanks. I quickly get the impression she is not open to me so I eject shortly after.

Takeaway: Looking for 1 second is by itself not an approach invitation. I should look for signs like brushing her hair, adjusting her clothes, or looking a little extra long too. She might have seen my reflection acting unconfident, I should approach more immediately and with longer steady strides.

Approach 3​

I see a pretty girl walking towards me but on the other side of a walkway. She passes by and I do not see any eye contact or signs of her closing the distance. I decide to turn around and try approaching anyway. Subconsciously I guess I'll get a neutral response. When I approach, I manage the angles poorly, so her shoulder is facing me while my body is directly facing her at a 45 degree angle. I am either standing straight or leaning in, not sure. I also get pretty close to her. She thanks me but does not give me much eye contact and quickly moves on, saying she has a boyfriend.

Takeaway: I came across too strong with the combination of full facing body language + getting close + not leaning back. It may have been better to get slightly farther in front of her before opening over my shoulder to avoid this problem. Getting close is fine but I should lean away slightly and open over my shoulder when I do.

Approach 4​

I see a girl with beautiful wavy hair walking some ways away from me. I fast walk to follow her and jog to close the distance shortly before approaching. I get close to her but right next to her side (I probably should have moved a little bit farther to be slightly in front of her). She gets confused at first but has a big beaming smile when I compliment her, and overall gave me a positive and thankful reception.

Spoiler: Conversation

Me: "Excuse me"
Her: "Oh, I'm so sorry."

Me: "Hi"
Her: "Hi"

Me: "Hi" <I smile, she smiles, we both stop>
Me: "I just saw you walk past back over there, and I wanted to say I thought you had the most beautiful wavy hair that I'd seen..."
Her: "That's really nice of you, thank you."

Me: "What's your name?"
Her: <Introduces herself>

Me: <Introduces myself>.
Me: "Oh sorry, I think we're a little bit in the way. Let's step to the side over here" <There's a crowd of people moving through the area, I break eye contact while stepping to the side with her>

Her: "I'm so sorry, I'm late for an apartment-er, appointment."
Me: "Apartment? You're taking me home already?" <Said in a mock accusatory way>

Her: <Laughs> Um, I gotta run because I'm already late. It was so nice of you to give me that compliment."
Me: "Yeah, no problem. I don't want you to be late. Uh, tell you what, let's chat some other time."

Her: "Uh, sure, but I just want you to know, I'm married, so..."
Me: "Oh really? Well, you're very lucky. I hope you make it on time for your appointment."

Her: "Thank you so much. Thank you for the compliment. I really appreciate it, have a good day."

Takeaways: I seemed to have really made this girl's day and left her better than I found her. I should remember this and try to replicate this positive impact on every girl I approach. Now for the technical stuff.

She was a nice girl, but my compliment was also more specific (calling out her hair) and may have contributed to a good reaction. I broke eye contact too early and lost the tension. I should have held it more strongly and held it when asking for compliance. My compliance ask was also weak, I could have said "Hold on, looks like there's some people coming back. Let's step to the side over there." The chase frame was good. The hail mary close could be improved with stepping closer, strong eye contact, and giving a more concrete date ask like "Okay, tell you what, let's grab a coffee some other time and get to know each other then."

Approach 5​

I see a pretty girl walking towards me outside a grocery store. She does not make eye contact but looks to the side, staring at a reflective glass on the side of the store. After she passes, I turn around and catch up. I am not sure how she will respond to my approach. I cannot get to her side due to a narrow space so I open from a short distance behind her.

Spoiler: Conversation

Me: "Excuse me" <Said a few feet behind her>
<She turns around>
Her: "Hi" <Her pitch goes higher up than her normal speaking voice from later in the conversation>

Me: "Hi. Uh, I just saw you pass by back over there and wanted to say I thought you looked incredibly pretty today."
Her: "Thank you" <She give a neutral facial expression with good voice>

Me: "Sorry, looks like we're in the way a little bit...uh...let's just step to the side over here" <I break eye contact and take a couple steps over
Me: "I just wanted to come say hello. What's your name?"
Her: <Introduces herself>

Me: <Introduces myself>
Her: "Nice to meet you"

Me: "Nice to meet you. How are you doing today?"
Her: "I'm good. I actually have to grab food and run out, so..."

Me: "Okay, you're in a rush right now?"
Her: "Yeah..."

Me: "Okay, well no worries. I hope you have a great day and find what you're looking for"
Her: "Thank you"

Takeaways: I thought she was not interested and trying to eject, but based on her voice pitch I think she might have liked me. She might have gave an approach invitation earlier and her neutral face might be more because of surprise. My compliance ask was weak, I should not have broken eye contact and should have said, "Hold on, let's step to the side over here" while holding eye contact. I also should have gone for a hail mary close.

Outcome​

I did not get a ton of opportunities to practice conversation in my approaches today, however I also went to a social event where I deliberately practiced moving conversations off factual topics. I was not able to stay long because my energy levels were low, and I was not particularly interested in any of the people there.

I did not pay attention to my eye contact too much today, and it seems to have had a negative effect. I have noticed many approaches seem to get "spellbroken" if I break eye contact too early, especially due to distractions in the environment. I should retain a goal of paying attention to strong eye contact and holding eye contact with great consistency.

My compliance asks were weak. I should be more firm and use strong eye contact.

When approaching from the side, I should move slightly farther up and look over my shoulder to help fix some of the angle mistakes.

I need to remember ABC (always be closing). Throw out the hail mary close, just to see the outcome.