I need help from the masters

[lex78]

Hey guys, first off I have to say I'm new to this site but incredibly impressed by the sound advice given to me by a tribal elder on a different matter.

So this is the situation. At the start of the summer I met a girl who was really cool. Although she is 5 years older than me she is a beautiful woman who was once a complete knockout in her younger years. We hit it off really well and she seemed crazy about me. We went out a few times , I met her friends and family and it was a lot of fun. Now the thing is she has a couple of young kids but also a house an awesome job and really able to sustain herself.
I didn't keep in touch the way I should mostly in part because I was confused about being involved with someone with kids and perhaps the possibility that she would not want anymore although we never discussed it. Also to be honest I was weighing options with other women (I did not tell her this of course)
I know this made her feel unwanted and at some point she asked if I'm just looking at this as a friendship. I said of course I want more but didn't put the effort to really show it and we never saw eachother again. I kinda half ass suggested getting together again a little later but by then she had moved on and said she was seeing someone and the distance between us ( 1 hour drive) but was totally respectful about it.
I believe the distance thing was just to not make me feel bad as we had no problem with that before.
After seeing a few other women who turned out to be just terrible even though younger and no kids, it got me thinking about her and how I must have seemed like a complete dick.
I actually felt really good around her.
I'm heading up to her area to see some friends and potentially buy a property in her area.
I feel the need to reach out and see what could happen.
For all I know she could be in love, maybe living with someone who knows.
It's been bothering me so I thought about sending the following text:

Hey Michelle , how have you been? I'll be in your neck of the woods next week , so I couldn't help thinking about you. I'm not sure what you've been up to in your life this past little while, and I don't want to cause any disruptions for you, but I'd really like to see you. If you can make some time to get together that would be great. Hope all is well.

Our last correspondence was a few months ago. I figured if I delayed until Christmas time it may give a bad impression.
Please give me your thoughts and how to make things ok here.

Thanks! !

 

[Mr.Rob]

Here is your improved text

Hey Michelle , how have you been? I'll be in your neck of the woods next week , which got me thinking about how your doing. Curious as to what you've been up to in your life since we last spoke. I'd like to get together and catch up on what we've missed since we last spoke Let me know if you're up for it. -Lex78

However your problem is that you don't know what you want. You are all over the place in indecision which is why you didn't get this girl in the first place and also why you're now wanting to go back to her.

Know what you want and screen for that in the women you date. If they do not match what you are looking for don't date them.

Good luck.

 

[lex78]

Hey Mr. Rob, thanks for the advice.
I'll be messaging her shortly. Hopefully the response will be positive.
If she does agree to meet up would you say it's ok to address the distance I created between us?
Should I come out and say that I'd like for us to reconnect and start seeing each other again ?
If she does or does not have a boyfriend should the approach be different to the above 2 items?
If she declines what would a good answer be to the door open, could I still address the distance i caused and how I regret it?
As a side note we've had sex before, I thought I'd mention that in case it would sway your answers.
Thanks! !