FR I tried to pull her to her own place.

[Skid]

Hey guys it's been a while since I posted anything mainly because I wasn't really making any sort of progress and wanted a break for awhile. I pretty much only have the last two parts of seduction to learn : physical escalation and relationships. And until I have my my own place (working on it) escalation is hard to learn because I've never been a room alone with a girl. Recently I decided the only way this is going to happen is if I pull girls to their own place. So for the last 2 weeks I starting going out to the beach once a week where there are tons of foreign girls who live by themselves on vacation etc so that was the plan.

I get there at around 2ish and start opening girls by themselves. First girl is in a blue bikini just turns away and tries to pretend I'm not there so I bail - Next!

Second girl is a cute blonde Belgian and eats up the compliment smiles and is really warm so I sit next to her and start screening her logistics she lives in an apartment in the cbd of Sydney with two guys both who are at work until midnight - I honestly cannot believe my luck. So I start deepdiving her mixed with some banter she's really fun to talk to and there is light flirting all the time. Her English is quite good and understands wit really well for a non native English speaker.

After sitting with her for 5 mins and she starts asking me what I'm doing for the rest of the day and she says that travelling alone is really lonely - the she jokes asking is that why I said hi to her. I know I should be moving forward so I ask if she's had lunch I want to get food and she should come.She agrees immediately and starts packing up her stuff to follow me lol. It ceases to amaze me.

We walk of the beach and we go into a store where I want food while we wait she talks more about how travelling alone is lonely and how she met some guy earlier in her trip that spent the afternoon with her (didn't know or care whether he slept with her or not). I actually can't believe how stupidly easy this is I may actually loose my v card. She asks how old I am I say I'm 20 - she says 23 she starts saying how she feels I'm way older.She says she wants food from a different place so we leave get her food then go back to the beach to eat.

We continue getting to know each other convo topics jump from our differing cultures to little rude Asian men. Eventually I realise that I'm probably just delaying pulling her we've had a bunch of high points so when we finish eating I try to pull a girl for the first time in my entire life : I suggest we go to the cbd.God it comes out clunky I cringe at the recollection of it. And then she says why?

Oops I think to myself , I need a reason.

I say so she can prove to me that it's actually filled with little rude Asian men. She says she wants to finish her tanning I say ok since I can't really think of a comeback - it's better to drop it immediately than to lose an argument. So that's the first slip up of the interaction I hope I didn't fuck up to bad.

We go back to tanning and I find out she's a feminist and she sees herself as an independent woman I ask if she is one of the crazy ones - she qualifies herself saying no isn't isn't one of the ones that runs round topless lol. I say I have nothing against feminism and girls can do anything guys can do except pee standing up she claims she can do that she just has to open her legs more than I do. She says she had to do it in Girl Scouts. She is clearly very comfortable with her sexuality or at very least peeing.

She says she got sunburned because she has no one to put it on her back lol - I take the hint and then offer she says that would sometimes be seen as flirting (TEST ALERT)- I smile at her and say "how tragic" then apply it to her back. After I finish I go for my bottle of water and it's empty I say I'm out of water and she offers me hers - more compliance I take a sip from her water because I'm an asshole and really thirsty.

The sun starts to go down abit and I see this as an opportunity to try pull again. I say we are going now the Suns going down you aren't going to get much tanning done - she says ok and backs her things again. As she does she says she doesn't want to take her bag with her - I say we can drop it at her apartment : perfect. Man it feels like this girl it making this really easy on me? It can't always be like this. At the same time I'm pretty proud of myself I feel like I'm reading her like a book.

As we get going she says she liked how I put my foot down and said we are leaving she said it was dominant. I'm so in.

We walk to the station and just keep bantering I lead her through station until we get to her stop then I follow her to her apartment more banter similar to what I read about somewhere here I believe the term is pull talk. As we keep walking the first seeds of doubt start to form in my head I start having anxiety since I've got no idea what I'm going to do once I was in the door.

We get inside and to her surprise one of the guys she is staying with is there I say hi introduce myself and she tells him I need to pee he doesn't seem to have a problem with me so I just chill and go pee.

Soon the guy leaves to go to work and then she goes to pee. I'm now alone in an apartment with a girl I intend to sleep with and my nerves start to go fucking crazy. She comes out and says she shouldn't go out dressed like this and she is gonna change I say ok wondering if she was gonna come out half naked because that would make my life so much easier since I am super nervous.

No luck.

She comes back into the living room dressed in some shorts and shirt . I'm trying to focus on how sexy her boobs look under her shirt but nerves make it hard too focus. She says we should leave soon or else the shops will close fuck my life I can feel the escalation window closing. I know I have to do something I don't even know how long I've been there and I should be kissing her in under 10 minutes. I say I want to charge my phone to buy some more time. I know I'm in my head way too much and I'm struggling to manage myself we've had plenty of light touching she's grabbed my arm and other non sexual touch I'd grabbed her thigh etc so that wasn't an issue I just didn't know how to make her horny. I think I'm not gonna get another chance like this for a very long time this seemed like such an easy pull so many things have fallen into place due to dumb luck :I just have to do something.

I walk up to her put my arms around her and slide them down her back onto her ass: no resistance. I'm looking into her eyes and she is just smiling. Do something my brain says. So I lean in for some reason she mistakes it for a hug but I pull my head back and kiss her wait a moment and then go again her head tilts forward a bit as I pull back. She wants me to lead.

I'm terrified of success right now. Like I start coming up with excuses saying to myself I don't want to get home too late& how I am I gonna get home? I've built myself up as this dominant masculine guy to this girl and now I'm gonna disappoint her by giving her shitty sex because I have no idea what I'm doing ;telling her I'm a Virgin isn't an escape either she'll just think I'm a fake and she wont believe she considered sleeping with me.

All these thoughts totally fuck me up I take my arms away and go sit on the couch. Then I get really mad at myself for being a pussy saying if I don't do it now my opportunity is gone. But that doesn't help. I start talking random shit to fill in the space were I should be making out with her she goes over to the fridge and starts snacking on cherry tomatoes and sits next to me not close tho. She says we should go.

I say I don't want to go to the cbd I'm tired I think I will just go home - she says why'd you come here then?

I deviously smile at her. She asks to flirt with me? But that's the only attractive behaviour I can pull off with my mood all I can think to my self is this conversation is so beta and pathetic I dunno what to do I just agree. I'm not following my intentions with action.She says she thinks I'm a really great guy and she wants my Facebook.

Yay...

I don't really want to give it to her because of the shame she knows I'm a fake : I give it to her anyway and I say we should go. We get out the door and she hugs me really tight. I feel like I don't deserve it I feel like shit. I've put myself into auto rejection.

We say our goodbyes and I walk off.



I know I'm being pretty hard on myself but I'm just so mad I wouldn't pull the trigger I dunno. Part of the problem I think is I'm a very mechanical learner I like step by step processes and I didn't have any idea of what I was doing - also the mood wasn't very sexual when we were inside also tips on creating a more sexual vibe just before isolation or even just in isolation. On the bright side this experience did open my eyes on how it's certainly possible to meet a girl and have sex with her the same day and I handed the logistics well most of the time.If anyone has any advice it or tips to help me get over my nerves it would help a lot thanks for reading!

Skid

 

[lao che]

This is great. You've done a lot right here, so you should be giving yourself a pat on the back.

This was a yes girl all the way, adventure holiday sex with a random stranger from the beach.
she was handing it to you on a plate, all you had to do was tuck in.
you spotted a lot of the signs, which is more than most guys would. But in the end it was your inability to pull the trigger that screwed you, all the other pieces were in place.

I'm gonna come Bachlk to this as I'm on phone ATM

 

[Skid]

Thanks man , appreciate the support. I just need to expose myself more to these situations so I'm more comfortable - its just created a sore spot because its really hard to find "yes girls" like this one I have no idea when another girl like this will pop up. Its very rare for me to find girls who start asking logistics so openly and give such obvious signals.

 

[lao che]

And until I have my my own place (working on it) escalation is hard to learn because I've never been a room alone with a girl. Recently I decided the only way this is going to happen is if I pull girls to their own place.

good plan. esp for girls on holiday they would be more inclined to have a guy back to a holiday room than the place where they usually live.

you might be surprised by how open girls can be to outdoors sex. scout around your usual haunting ground for suitable, secluded places, even the beach. but it takes a strong frame and balls and you might not be ready yet.

After sitting with her for 5 mins and she starts asking me what I'm doing for the rest of the day and she says that travelling alone is really lonely - the she jokes asking is that why I said hi to her. I know I should be moving forward so I ask if she's had lunch I want to get food and she should come.She agrees immediately and starts packing up her stuff to follow me lol. It ceases to amaze me.

We walk of the beach and we go into a store where I want food while we wait she talks more about how travelling alone is lonely and how she met some guy earlier in her trip that spent the afternoon with her (didn't know or care whether he slept with her or not). I actually can't believe how stupidly easy this is I may actually loose my v card. She asks how old I am I say I'm 20 - she says 23 she starts saying how she feels I'm way older.She says she wants food from a different place so we leave get her food then go back to the beach to eat.

all of these translate as "i want you to fuck me"

I suggest we go to the cbd.God it comes out clunky I cringe at the recollection of it. And then she says why?

Oops I think to myself , I need a reason.

I say so she can prove to me that it's actually filled with little rude Asian men

decent recovery. you jumped ahead a step here, maybe try to seed something before you make a suggestion, give some plausible deniability. however good recovery thinking on your feet.

I say we are going now the Suns going down

going where, by the way?

As she does she says she doesn't want to take her bag with her - I say we can drop it at her apartment : perfect. Man it feels like this girl it making this really easy on me? It can't always be like this. At the same time I'm pretty proud of myself I feel like I'm reading her like a book.

good good good. she was making it easy for you, you're right. is it always like this? you might be surprise when you start to notice all the subtle cues, how easy girls will often make it for you.

As we get going she says she liked how I put my foot down and said we are leaving she said it was dominant. I'm so in.

she's telling you how to seduce her. hold frame, dominant and lead.

As we keep walking the first seeds of doubt start to form in my head I start having anxiety since I've got no idea what I'm going to do once I was in the door.

if in doubt, escalate. that's what you do once in the door. even if it seems forced or awkward. you have to believe, and you already for sure knew, that she wants your dick.

I can feel the escalation window closing. I know I have to do something I don't even know how long I've been there and I should be kissing her in under 10 minutes

at least you're aware of what's going on and where you are at in the interaction

I just didn't know how to make her horny.

she's already horny. but .. this is tough to explain, i don't wanna just wanna tell you to be natural. but you have to find your own style.

I walk up to her put my arms around her and slide them down her back onto her ass: no resistance. I'm looking into her eyes and she is just smiling. Do something my brain says. So I lean in for some reason she mistakes it for a hug but I pull my head back and kiss her wait a moment and then go again her head tilts forward a bit as I pull back. She wants me to lead.

you did well here. but this probably is also where you fell. some suggestions might be,

take her hand and lead her to the sofa.

ask her to show you her room. cheesy but effective.

say "you sure we're alone now?" cool, lift up your arms" then pull her top up over her head while kissing her.

blame her for your nervousness. then it doesn't matter if there's some awkwardness, nerves. you can even use that to your advantage, don't try to hide it.
often i'll just look at a girl and say 'wow!' in a sexy voice after that first kiss. wow, that felt good, huh? is the implication. wow, i know you feel the chemistry too



i'll have to leave it there for now. more later.

i hope someone else chips in with how to deal with the last-minute nerves.

ultimately, you left this girl disappointed. but it's understandable. work on your sexy vibe and try to really internalize the fact that whenever a girl is talking to you for any reason (other than she has to for work or whatever) it means she wants to fuck you and you should therefore escalate.
and don't worry too much about not knowing having had sex before. you know what goes where, at least.
man you're only twenty you have the world at your feet!!

ultimately you've got to try and ENJOY the nerves. because it's a wonderful feeling of accomplishment, and the nerves won't last forever.

meh, i feel like i've written a lot but not helped you at all.

 

[lao che]

Chase framing would help ramp up the sexy vibe

E. G 'we can drop it off at your place... If you promise not to try and take advantage of me'

Or

'Ok, get changed, but nothing too sexy i need to concentrate'

Or. When she's suggesting the sun cream is ''flirting'' you could say 'don't get your hopes up, girl, you gotta put a ring on it before we take this relationship to the next step'

Just off the top of my head examples. You get the idea. Then it comes down to vibe, nice tone and eye contact

 

[Skid]

you might be surprised by how open girls can be to outdoors sex. scout around your usual haunting ground for suitable, secluded places, even the beach. but it takes a strong frame and balls and you might not be ready yet.

Yeah I don't think I'd actually want to do this unless the girl blew my mind with hotness. This girl would probably have been up for something like this judging from her character if she didn't have logistics. The beach itself is very crowded and there aren't really any secluded places on it. I'd much prefer a room.

I say we are going now the Suns going down

going where, by the way?

To the train station

decent recovery. you jumped ahead a step here

I did feel like just randomly bringing up lets go to the area where your apartment was a bit clunky. I do remember saying I wanted to try something from the asian stalls or whatever which is why later she rationalizes us going there as "shopping". What would you suggest instead?

if in doubt, escalate.

I like that

she's already horny. but .. this is tough to explain, i don't wanna just wanna tell you to be natural. but you have to find your own style.

Everything up until I walked into the door was natural but then I snapped out of it. I wasn't sure what action exactly I should take at this point. She didn't seem that horny to me she wasn't grabbing at me or anything like that - I was under the impression that my next step was to make her wet. I guess I was over thinking how difficult it is to sexually arouse a girl.

you did well here. but this probably is also where you fell. some suggestions might be,

take her hand and lead her to the sofa.

ask her to show you her room. cheesy but effective.

say "you sure we're alone now?" cool, lift up your arms" then pull her top up over her head while kissing her

I was thinking I had to make her wet before I take her clothes off otherwise she was gonna resist. Clearly that's a mistake. I was also thinking too many steps ahead. Your suggestion saying I should tell her to lift up her arms and take her shirt off really spoke to me that was probably the next step and then ask her to show me her room or lead her to sofa. My brain was saying escalate but then it was returning how do I escalate from here? You've already given me the answer : if in doubt escalate (in other words TAKE HER CLOTHES OFF ). Instead I sat down like a baby bitch because I was worried she would stop me from taking her shirt off - once I tell her to lift her arms I'm committed to taking her shirt off and so forth.

ultimately, you left this girl disappointed.

That was part of my issue. I felt trapped because I felt like she was gonna be disapointed with the quality of sex - this girl was really physically attractive to me (and emotionally) when I got to the point where I should have kissed her more and started stripping her I felt like I was going to disapoint her either way : I wanted to give her an amazing experience but I felt like it wasn't possible due to my inexperience I wasn't sure whether I was going to make her orgasm and so I closed myself off to her. I knew she wanted to have sex with me there was never a I doubt in my mind after she asked me what I was doing for the rest of the day. The millions of signals she gave me afterwards only continued to confirm that.

I'll tell you the answer I should have said to myself : "If I walk away from this girl right now who without any possible doubt wants to have sex with me I have exactly a 100% chance of disapointing her and leaving her even more lonely than she was complaining about before. However , if I try to escalate and do my best to have sex with her its not certain I will be able to satisfy her but there is still the smallest chance that I will ,and because of that really my only option is to try".

blame her for your nervousness.then it doesn't matter if there's some awkwardness, nerves. you can even use that to your advantage, don't try to hide it.

ultimately you've got to try and ENJOY the nerves. because it's a wonderful feeling of accomplishment, and the nerves won't last forever.

I've always had an issue with this. I've always associated nerves with weakness and I want to stamp them out whenever they show up. Everytime I've been nervous around a girl I've lost her soon after - something that has just occurred to me if that it may not be the nerves that loses me girls but the lack of action that it causes I just feel like whenever I try something on a girl and it comes out slightly awkward she's going to be like : "oh , this guy doesn't know what he's doing I thought he was this sexy experienced guy but he's not I misread him. goodbye." Do you have any examples of using nerves to your advantage and not hiding them?

Chase framing would help ramp up the sexy vibe

Yeah there is definitely an absence of chase framing and sexual innuendos in this interaction. I feel like I have a pretty decent vibe and eye contact I've been told by girls I'm extremely intense to talk too. And so I often rely on to make girls want me - that I don't actively encourage a girl verbally to imply chasing so that's something that needs work and seems to have fallen through the cracks in my game.

meh, i feel like i've written a lot but not helped you at all.

You've given me a lot to think about and pointed out some of my weaknesses which I haven't noticed that's all I can ask .