I wanna lose my virginity and pratice sex skills but...

[onlyshallow]

I did a couple approaches these last few days even though I was super busy and they went all right (got 2 numbers for 5 approaches ), but I thought on my situation and, while I'm glad to approach girls, my problem is that I feel girls think I'm experienced, but I'm an 18 year old virgin who only made out once. They'll probably notice that I have no skills in bed and therefore won't fuck a second time. I feel that if I lose my virginity and build my sex skills this way, It'll take way more time than necessary. I'd rather find a girlfriend and fuck her regularly for 6-7 months just to learn how to fuck like a rockstar. However, this site recommends getting a girlfriend by impressing her with your cock. How could I do that with no experience? And how could I get a girlfriend that accepts my virginity and is willing to let me learn if I always fall into lover territory?

Basically, I just see sex as something really complicated, no matter how many articles I read and realistic porn videos I watch, and I'd just feel way more at ease to learn it the right way using this method than the one this site prescribes.

 

[ray_zorse]

Dude really, you got 2 numbers already? Killing it... it's GREAT to see you putting your balls on the line and talking to some hotties, and frankly if you just keep doing that and pushing your interactions then questions like this will become redundant, I mean once you start to go on several dates a week then who cares how my times you fuck up the sex (if any times) because you'll have plenty of pussy to practice on, can't fail to improve if u learn from mistakes.

But zooming in from the bigger picture and addressing your question... well firstly you are in pretty good shape already, you've had a makeout so you couldn't be going that far wrong, what could be more natural than simply making out with her till you are both ready, and then just slipping it in? You already know how to do this, it's in your DNA.

I appreciate your catch-22 but there's really no way around it except to jump in and try to do it. What you can do is arm yourself with an escalation plan, not in too much detail but the broad steps at least, and here Drexel Scott's book "Straight to Sex" is useful, it's less than $10 and will take you through warming her up with gentle kissing, dealing with her objections and having the sex itself. As a bonus it also discusses what to do when you've just pulled her home.

My procedure is a bit simpler than Drexel's, this might not work in every case since it will depend what she likes etc (so may have to be more creative if she doesn't respond as expected, and/or do more of the things she likes and less of others)... but as a broad outline:

1. Kiss her. A good way is to put your hand on her cheek or chin etc and turn her head towards you as you go in to kiss on the lips, if she resists turning her head then you have early warning of problems so won't end up kissing thin air.

2. How to kiss: With closed mouth and soft lips (muscles relaxed) just nibble on her lips a bit, try to take a little bit of her lip between yours and just play with it a little then let go and go for the other one, if she likes this her mouth will naturally open up a little as you proceed and you can try a little tongue, don't go overboard, just lick her lips slightly as you nibble and this will prompt her to meet your tongue with hers, if she doesn't then try just gently exploring between her lips, taking your time about it and not going further than you have to, and see if you can hook up with her tongue. By this stage I think you'll know what to do, just kiss her passionately with tongue for a bit and she should do the same.

3. Erogenous zones... at this stage I would generally start making love to her ear, you kiss it by nibbling and eventually adding some tongue, as you did before. Putting your tongue right down her earhole is something to build up to but she'll love it when properly warmed up. Remember to breathe some hot breath into her ear while nibbling, licking etc, especially if it's wet from your saliva this will have a hot/cold effect.

4. You should also be feeling her body whilst doing this, hands on her back, sides, stomach etc, usually inside her clothes depending on what she's wearing. If you're properly making love to her ear she'll begin to pant and moan and then it's pretty much a done deal (note her neck is also good although not as sensitive as the ear, also don't lick or slobber on her body except the orifices and the nipples, just kiss).

5. When she's expressing her pleasure, keep kissing her or doing the ear or neck or moving between these, plus go for that pussy and start stimulating it, through the pants at first, then moving inside to the panties and eventually to the pussy itself. It's handy to have some lube to put on your fingers here.

6. Locate the clit and gently stimulate, she should arch her body and writhe around and rhythmically push against your hand, when she's nicely warmed up from this it's time to throw on a condom and fuck her, you can refer to articles on this. A true pro would also continue to stimulate that pussy and other erogenous zones while dealing with the clothes, the condom etc, until inside her, cos it can happen they change their mind and run away, this has happened to me.

Hope that's useful.

Ray

 

[onlyshallow]

Yea I'm proud for the 2 numbers (even though they were flakes) and I'll continue heavily in a week or two after finals! Thanks for the love man! And, I thought more about my insecurities towards sex and it's really about finding the clit and not cumming too fast. I know that I'll be able to be dominant, have great positions, an ok rhythm I could master with pratice, etc. I'm just really confused about the clit, I looked it up on the internet and sometimes it looks like a small dick, other times like a small dot. Do they have some sort of shaft that we can push in order to see more of it like us guys have with our cock? And do you have any tips on not cumming in 8 seconds like a virgin, are there some ways to last a decent amount of time when it's your first lay ever?

Also, this is really off topic, but I approach girls who send me ioi's, but very often, I witness girls making an offended face when they first see me, a bit like this :

and then sending me obvious ioi's shortly after or the next time they see me. What's weird is that they still make a similar face, but in a more submissive way, almost saying "ahhh when will you stop? I don't trust you", almost with puppy eyes. But like I said, they're clearly interested, and it confuses me. I approach the girls who smile at me, or just make any facial expressions that make them seem open for the approach while sending their ioi's and it goes relatively ok. Problem is though, 75% of the hot girls that show obvious interest give me the submissive offended look I describe and I don't know how to approach in this situation, what type of vibe to pull off without it being awkward and/or untrustworthy.

All in all though, I really wanna thank you for your advices man, you put so much details and efforts in them man! I'm really grateful for it, one love!

 

[ray_zorse]

I'm not sure about the issue of whether you come quickly because that isn't a problem I've had, I've had a lot of performance anxiety (can't get it up) and times when I cannot get to orgasm and eventually have to stop (this happened the first time I had sex and I then had to wait 3yrs for another opportunity, unfortunately did not have GC haha). Is there any specific reason you think this might be an issue?

As to finding the clit I checked out some different Internet resources and this seems very accurate and comprehensive, may be too much info, so you can just look at the first picture in the article, although it has some info about how to stimulate the clitoris in the first few paragraphs, before going on to discuss her internal reproductive parts in detail.
http://m.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/anatomy_pink_parts_female_sexual_anatomy

I'm not too sure what is going on with the IOIs but women's reactions to you will change a lot throughout your journey, so I would say it does not matter, press on regardless Also, though it's good practice to be on the lookout for IOIs and respond to them, especially as a beginner you do not want to be putting too much importance on IOIs, usually it's down to you to make something happen, so if she's cute go approach.

Thanks for the kind words, I don't mind helping guys out if I can. Putting things into words is also a useful exercise for me (on that note, hope to see some FRs in the near future).

Ray

 

[onlyshallow]

Well for premature ejaculation, I'm a virgin (you come very fast the first couple of times, so I've heard) and I started doing no fap 4-5 days ago, wanna try it for at least a month or two, which I've heard can make you come faster. However, when I was fapping I took my time 90% of the time and I'm not the kind of guy that pops a boner every time a girl shows some skin, so no I don't really have any concrete indicators that I may be a premature ejaculator. Concerning the clits, i'll look up that article, one can definitely learn from a female perspective on this point ;p!

The FR's will be coming in 2-3 weeks, right now I'm just too busy to focus and make time for mass approaching, so I'll just pratice my social skills in general (a big part of my journey is becoming more sociable, erasing the belief that people are mean, always on the fence for negative traits,etc. I did a lot of progress on this point in the last 2-3 months though) And yeah, you can never exercise enough your writing skills, I do it all the time in my first language (french, it's the official language where I live), definitely a big upside of this forum when thinking about it haha !