Iceman's Log

[lceman]

I've come to realize I'm nowhere near as close to my goals with women as I want to be.

Sure, I've taken girls home from the club, bars, social events, daygame etc but I don't meet new girls as consistently as I'd like.

So I'm starting a new journal for accountability.

I'm rusty as it's been a while - I've been in a relationship, had health issues, and recently been all in on business. So we'll see.

Today I checked out a nice park where the demographics were just too old. Pinged one girl who responded yellow and I didn't pursue cause it felt awkward - maybe tonight I'll scope out another area or two.

 

[lceman]

Finally poked my head up from business for the first time in a while.

Fundamentals first: Got a new haircut and losing fat by the minute. Next to go are the circles under my eyes.

I started pinging girls again when out and about and wow am I rusty. Had a few good convos and asked one girl out to no avail:

Spoiler: failed ask

I go into a vintage shop, the cute bubbly girl informs me of a sale. The other customers leave and I tell her to pick me a jacket so she can be my stylist. She doesn't really speak english but happily complies and we have some back and forth. She's a gamer girl with rockstar tattoos and a great sense of style. I ask if she wants to hang out sometime she says "no, i have work" i say "after work" she says "after work (points to the right) game (points to the left) boyfriend". Shoot. I asked like a chump but it's been a while so I'm not mad about it.

Next time: have a specific date rather than simply ask to hang out.

Step by step.

 

[lceman]

Pings are getting me nowhere. The girls here are skittish and even if they're open to me saying something it's just too easy for them to keep walking.

It's hard for me to draw a line on who or who not to approach on the street, so I end up just walking around a lot.

I've just started joining some meetup groups to see if social circle pans out.

Next habit: be much more aggressive with eye contact to screen for who's open to a real approach.

 

[lceman]

A few things:

I'm not getting the IOIs I'm used to. Could be cultural, could be the demographic, could be how I'm dressed.
Either way it's weird to not get much in return from my eye contact.

For example a girl yesterday I met while out getting food - made it obvious I was looking at her, could tell she was watching me but she didn't do anything. Once I actually started talking to her she was receptive and compliant but before that, nothing. Happily agreed to meet again then ghosted.

Same thing I've found on the street/public transport where I can tell they're looking yet won't respond to anything except a super clear direct conversation.

This lack of buy in is making me feel awkward, and my approaches come off timid. "Foreign guy trying to talk to me" frame which obviously leads nowhere good.

I guess the move is to be more shameless.

I set up online again with some old pictures. Tinder isn't showing me, got maybe 10 bumble matches so far no dates.

So apparently my game sucks. Lots to be improved.

 

[lceman]

Not getting IOIs was only happening in one specific area where gen z girls are just busy going about their day. In this city the IOIs tend to be more subtle so it's not really a problem.

I went on a date yesterday with a girl I met in the mall.

Spoiler: "Date" (pull -> resistance -> no lay)

Met a girl in the mall - she was sitting on a bench and I went and opened indirect like a bitch. She was hesitant and didn't speak much english but open to chat. Attraction was there so I kept talking, moved her a little, and we decided to meet up the next day. I would've gone for same day but she lives an hour away and had to leave soon.

Fast forward to yesterday. First of all I didn't have much of a plan ahead of time. Logistics got screwed up and we meet at a different time/place than intended, but it's still near where I live. I was starving so I got some food and ate, we sit outside and walk around for a little. Take her to the workout park because I want to get some reps in.

The whole time she's compliant but hesitant. I decide to take her back to the crib because I might as well, and even before we get there it's tons of resistance. Once she realizes where we're going she's objecting left and right but stays compliant, same deal once we get inside.

I just keep persisting and slowly building closer towards the lay. Go from her not wanting to touch to eventually we're lying together, kissing, some touching, some clothes off. Turns out she's a virgin (supposedly), it's been a long time, her culture is not very open, goes from saying she wants to wait for The One to saying she would do it tomorrow so she can prepare.

It's hours of this that eventually I don't get past and she has to leave.

Her main objections were:
1. too fast/doesn't know me
2. doesn't know why I like her specifically/you do this with every girl
3. culture/lack of experience

So. Yes it's cool to persist through all her objections to pull, but it would be way cooler to handle them ahead of time.

Which should've been done on an actual date. Build comfort (what's missing), get to know each other, set the right frames.

Besides fixing the obvious errors here my next step is to be more direct and sexual on the approach.

 

[lceman]

I haven't fixed the direct sexual approach yet. And I'm still airballing from OLD as of now.

But I did meet a girl in the library yesterday. Then I banged her last night. So I'm at least doing some things right.

Feels good to be back.