FU invitation after a first no: go for it or "punish" her?

[lux7]

I was with a guy, a pretty girl passed by, I touched her arm, she turned around but didn't stop to talk.

Very shortly after she'd pass around again, hovering at around one meter from my spot.
No friends of hers were around, seemed quite a coincidence she was just there for no reason so I ascribed it to her wishing to being opened again.

But... I didn't, laughed it off and commented it with the guy I was talking who'd also tell me she was "looking at me".

I wanted to "play it cool", "raise my value" and "punish" her.. Sort of.
The risk of course is that you won't have another chance and she wouldn't consider my refusal an equalizer but would write me off.
What I'm not so sure about is... How likely is it she'd autoreject if she actually rejected you first?

Indeed another occasion I could easily approach never materialized again though -well she went to the toilet but a pal of mine who helped me that evening had just gotten here, felt rude to leave me there standing-.
She just sat with friends, so since it would have annoyed me to just leave without "giving it a try" I just went for a desperate move while she was around her friend and she shot me down (well, she actually said "later", so kinda of a polite brush off but still).


So the million dollar question, in a club/bar environment, would you re-open the girl who's showing you interested after a brush off?

 

[Prehistoric]

Re: FU Night game - opening invitation after a first no : go for it or "punish"

Until very recently I would almost never reapproach girls unless they gave me some very positive signals the first time, but a very ego-less wingman of mine is really helping me getting over this and pushing me to reapproach them.

From my recent experiences reapproaching after disappearing for a while 1) often raises your value becauae you are showing you are not emotionally affected by the enviroment 2) helps you distinguish from clear NOs, girls who realy want to be left alone and fake NOs, girls who were either unprepared the first time or testing your persistance and how much you actually like them.

Even more powerful is reapproaching after they saw you talking positively with other girls or even simply just having fun with a group of people.

 

[lux7]

Re: FU Night game - opening invitation after a first no : go for it or "punish"

Man, when you said "I would almost never reapproach a girl who said no", it made me think.

That's a cool trait you have actually, such as the ability to write off easily.

A lot of people, me included, get hungup with women they already had an interaction with because they have this urge to "get her", even more powerfully so if it was a no at the beginning.

On extreme cases, that's what brings people to stalking behaviour.

On milder level, it's actually many people suffer from this "stalking tendencies".



Anyway, back to the topic, so you think it would have been a good time to re-open her when she was hovering around?

 

[Prehistoric]

Re: FU Night game - opening invitation after a first no : go for it or "punish"

Man, when you said "I would almost never reapproach a girl who said no", it made me think.

That's a cool trait you have actually, such as the ability to write off easily.

A lot of people, me included, get hungup with women they already had an interaction with because they have this urge to "get her", even more powerfully so if it was a no at the beginning.

I think both extremes are wrong probably. It is certainly good to be able to move on when things are going nowhere and avoiding wasting time, energy and becoming saddened/frustrated/bitter in the process but by automatically discarding all the girls that are not receptive on the first opening, you are probably missing a lot of potential success.

A wingman of mine approaches women three times as a rule of thumb before moving on. I think it depends on the context (day/bar/club/social circle) and the type of first rejection she gives you. Right now I might try up to 4 approaches in a club if the rejections were very light. During the day you might probably looking like a stalker if you approach more than twice. I punish only when the rejection was blatantly rude and mean, for example if you approach a girl on the train and she stands up and with a pissed-off face goes sitting far away from you. I might be reluctant to reapproach her if she's around me again later. But I know guys who would.

Anyway, back to the topic, so you think it would have been a good time to re-open her when she was hovering around?

I actually saw an infield video on youtube of one guy finding himself in the same exact situation you were. He tried to stop the girl with his hand, she walked away. Then she came back, he reapproached her, she was much more receptive, he brought her around, then to his place and bedded her. Too bad I can't find the video again!

 

[lux7]

Re: FU Night game - opening invitation after a first no : go for it or "punish"

Interesting, and how's your experience with re-opening after a (mild) "no" ?

Off topic, but I wonder sometimes how can people have infield video lasting that long without the people being filmed even realizing, and some of the 1:1 dates/same day pick up on Youtube look a bit too well filmed not to make you at least think they might be fake.

 

[Prehistoric]

Re: FU Night game - opening invitation after a first no : go for it or "punish"

It happened last weekend. I opened a girl on the dance floor, she smiled but went away. I reopened her later in the smoking lounge and we had a conversation and light kino. Sadly I was later cockblocked by her girlfriend.