L'ascesa di dissoluto

[Don Giovanni]

New journal with a cooler name. Reference on the opera.

I stopped writing last journal, because of constant changes in laws where I live, which interfered with my cold approach goals and motivation. You could say that I wasn’t serious enough, but times are tougher for an inspiring rake.

Nevertheless I thought it would still be useful to write down my encounters with the fairer sex. From social circle to occasional cold approach, everything will go down here.

 

[Don Giovanni]

21.11.

HBMedicine and HBBordeaux

I outlined how we met in another thread.

met 2 girls cant decide

Hey guys, hope everyone is keeping up. Haven't posted in a while, since my country is in almost complete lockdown. So....I don't want to screw up the few opportunities I get :) A girl I friendzoned myself 3 years back and started seeing her last month and am slowly turning it around came to my...

www.skilledseducer.com

I invited HBBordeaux over and she invited HBMedicine. There was also my roommate and her boyfriend, a very good friend of mine.

They were on time and HBBordeaux brought some rakija with her, HBMedicine brought white wine. I had 2 bottles of red wine myself ready.

I was nervous at first, but that passed quickly. I was sitting beside HBBordeaux, and HBMedicine was positioned opposite to us. I kept my focus on them, not talking about myself. Exchanged couple prolonged eye contacts with HBMedicine.

Then we were telling stories. I joked it was like we were in Decameron. I told my long story from the time I went with my friends to Moldova. It’s about 10min long, everybody tells me that it reminds them of the movie Hangover. They were completely immersed and laughed at the story. Told me they pictured it like they were there.

HBMedicine slips out she is seeing someone for the past 3 months, but doesn’t want to call him boyfriend. I so happen to know the guy and he is really a cool and friendly guy. That explains her long replying times to texts.

I was focusing on HBBordeaux from that on. She was qualifying a lot to me. For example on not doing drugs, when I said I’m not that kind of person, but don’t mind other people doing them. That she broke the police hour law a couple times when I said fuck the new laws. Qualified her taste for music is like mine or something like that.

But there was one thing that was off. She didn’t seem relaxed. Her body language was close and wasn’t receptive to touch. Simple social stuff like touching her upper arm when making a point, touching her shoulder while we were laughing. When I was telling my story she wasn’t able to hold eye contact for long, like HBMedicine did.

I did a cold read on her.

“My first impression of you was that you are a spontaneous, laid back person. But now that I have spend a little time with you I can see that you are actually a very orderly person. The kind of which values work and discipline.”

She liked that.

“Wow, I always find peoples first impressions of me interesting. And lately people tell me I am what I realy feel like, so that means I’m becoming truer to myself.”

She is a very thoughtful person. Likes psychology,phylosophy and likes to engage in deep conversations. Sometimes she’s in the clouds, but I like her way of thinking and looking on the world. Not so different than mine, mine is more grounded though.

Made a compliment on her nail polish, which is bordeaux red and suits her hair and her dark brown eyes. She complimented my nail polish. I asked her if she could borrow me hers, but unfortunately she ran out of it.

She likes to take walks, so I suggested we go for a walk sometime, because I know a good hiking path around here.

Then I took my guitar and singed a few tunes. They listened to me in silence, then applouded me.

HBMedicine had to leave, because of the police hour and my roomemate and her boyfriend joined. They told me to take it easy on HBBordeax, that I’m leaning in to close on her, when she went to the toilet. Thanked them and became more aware of my body language and where I’m directing my attention. After that they said it was all cool. Even HBBordeaux touched me a couple of times, which got me thinking today that I should be more careful about giving my attention.

It was a lot more social from then on. There were a few times when it was just me and HBBordeaux talking, but that was it.

We emptied all bottles and realised we’re drunk. We decided to go watch a movie together. Me and HBBordeaux were laying together and my friend and roommate beside her. We weren’t touching but she laughed at all my comments during the movie.

It was midnight, when she decided to go. I asked her if she would like to smoke a cigarette before she leaves, but she declined, saying that shes too tired. Cool, I rolled myself a cigarette and hugged her goodbye.

I need to find ways to make this girl comftarble with me being physical with her. Other than than I think she likes me.

 

[Don Giovanni]

30.11.

Texted HBfriendzone yesterday. Conversations are getting more kinky every time, but it's moving so SLOW.

It ended with:

DG: come over this week we'll make dinner
DG: we can be dressed if you want
HBfriendzone: hahah
HBfirendzone: but nooo.... im so busy this week

She knows where this is going and is unsure. I will leave it at this for another 14 days and see if I can get her to come over before holydays.

Texted HBBordeaux today, just to see what's going on with her. She proposed we hang this week and wants HBMedicine to come along too, because HBMedicine leaves next week. I didn't object to that, it doesn't even bother me to be honest.
What bothers me is her frame, which is very friendly again. When we're texting she's addressing me in plural as its me, roommate and her boyfriend. She clearly wants to be friends and expand her social circle. I MUST NOT LOSE MY FRAME.

I tried to spike the conversation with a joke about how police seized one of my packages on the border, with a photo of me in front of the police station. I wanted to take that and joke about how my cocaine business is going to be ruined but unfortunately she took that seriously and didn't reply.

I have to remind myself to make my jokes clearer and emphasize the tone of the joke.

Went for a walk today, I wanted to approach. There were maybe 3 - 5 girls worth approaching in time span of 2 hours. I had my approach anxiety back, so I didn't do any. Same story again... I will push myself this week to do at least some approaching.

Then went to a store. I talked to the clerk for about 2 min. She's cute, studies in another city during the weekends. There was some light flirting. Next time I will ask her out.

 

[Don Giovanni]

1.12.

Went for a walk to a nearby hiking path today. Said hello to most of the people passing by.

Did 3 “semi” approaches.

First one was a lady in her 30s with a big black and purple coat.

DG: What a coat!
HB: What am I supposed to say to that?

We both stop.

DG with a smile: Nothig, I just thought it was interesting.
HB: I didn’t know how to interpret it... sory.
DG: Take it as a compliment.

She smiles back and thanks me. We go our ways. Too old for me.

Next one had a good figure, but I saw her just from the back. I asked her for directions. She was also to old for me in her late 30s, so I thanked her and went on.

Next one was a girl in her 20s walking her dog. Finally, and my vibe was more social from previous approaching.

DG: Looks like you have a well behaved dog.
HB: Thanks.

We both stop look at each other. I smile, she smiles back.

DG: How old is he?
HB: 8 months.
DG: Oh... Have a good day!
HB: You to!

It’s was so trivial, but it felt good.

With so few opportunities at my hands now, when everybody is sitting behind their computers all day long, I should be alert when an opportunity presents it self.

Next, reality paced openers.

 

[Don Giovanni]

5.12.

HBbordeaux and HBmedicine came over to my place. HBbordeaux brought her sister with her, I invited a friend. I didn't plan on making any moves, because of her sister, rather enjoy our time together. Well, thats not completely true, I did have a plan.

1. don't get drunk
2. make sure you give her slightly less attention than she gives you
3. escalate touch if possible

We got together around 17.30. We talked, drinked wine, smoked and played cards. I dont remember the exact succession of events, so here are more important ones.

HBmedicne was giving me glances here and there. I wrote her off because of her 'boyfriend' who is a good guy I also happen to know. But anyway, I sat next to her as I noticed that. She mentioned I have a piercing gaze. That night when we met and we were riding down with the elevator alone she almost got chills down her spine.

But then when I started escalating, directing more attention towards her, she backed off. It seemed as she suddenly got second thoughts, her 'boyfriend' maybe.

My friend, lets call him Mat, he can get reckless. He wanted to dance with me, spin me around, but I didn't let him. Had to be a be a bit rougher with him, but it was all joke. He was sharing some personal addiction issues and got the girls sympathies. They got interested in him, which got me butthurt on the inside lol. HBbordeaux and her sister were talking to him more... Her sister got visibly interested in him, but he has a girlfriend, so nothing happened.

He's a good pal though. Asked me which girl interests me. Than when we ran out of wine and we were wondering who should go to the store, I offered to go and he told her to accompany me. Nice of him.

We were vibing, I touched her upper hand, back of her back, casual stuff. Mentioned I should show her one historical building that's currently being renovated. She would like that too. Asked me about my friend Mat, if he is ok. I explained her, that that's just his way of seeking attention and is doing just fine. She talked about him like he was some kind of human specimen. That made me laugh inside.

I didn't get other chances to escalate with HBbordeaux. She was sitting across the table on the counch and would be too obvious and needy if I tried to move next to her where was no space.

I remember talking about playing an 300.000 eur pipe organ and music in general to HBmedicine and HBbordeaux. When I was done they looked at each other and said 'I told you! When he talks I'm there and feel everything he talks about!'. That did my ego good.

I also remember joking to HBbordeaux about her sitting on a casting counch. She grabbed that joke and took it further. Another time she said she is looking for a model for a photo shoot she has to do and I voulenteered . As an act. That was also funny.

My roommate came and hanged every now and then. She told me the next day that I was teasing HBbordeaux in an annoying way a couple of times. She didn't mention exactly what I said and I'm not taking her seriously. We were just talking the other day how one friend of hers was teasing her and she wasn' sure if he was hitting on her. So I think thats related.

They wanted to order coke on a high point of the night. I'm grateful the dealer didn't pick up the phone. Just last time they talked how they stopped doing drugs, now they agree on doing coke. People say, people do...

It was a nice evening. They went home around 0.30.

1. I didn't get fucked up, which is awesome, but I could drink less anyway
2. Did that.
3. Kinda goes against being not giving her attention, so I need to find a way around that...

 

[Don Giovanni]

12.10.

I was waiting for my food in front of a fast food joint. There was a group of a guy and 2 girls also waiting for their food. They had a cat so I used that as an opener. Talked for a short time, then said bye as we got the food. I saw them a few times since the lockdown, so I’m guessing I will see them again.

Went to a store after that and the clerk said she loves my nails (I have them polished in black with white lightning bolts). She wasn’t my type, but yeah... pecocking works!

 

[Don Giovanni]

16.12.

The stores opened today for one week and I was thinking of taking advantage of that.

I was walking through the city centre and a cute, extravagantly dressed girl passed me by. I glanced at her briefly, she didn’t look at me.

Then I went to a thrift shop. I was looking at coats as I noticed the same girl walked behind my back and started checking out sweaters next to me.

I pretended I haven’t noticed her, then turned torwards her:

DG: Hey, you were walking past the main square before, didn’t you?
HBExtravagance: Hey, that was me, how did you remember?
DG: You’re dressed unnusual... in a good way!
HB: Thanks!

Than I turned back and looked at one jacket. Asked the clerk for the price, returned back.

I put the jacket on than turned torwards her.

DG: What do you think?
HB: I think it suits you. Depends on what style you’re going for.
DG: All my clothes are from the before covid season haha
HB: Haha, same here
DG: But does it fit?
HB: If you’re going for slightly baggy look (I’m on the shorter spectrum haha), then yes... I think it looks good on you.
DG: Let me guess... you study fashion.
HB: Yes, you’re right! How did you know?
DG: You look like a fashion student. And you’re 20 years old?
HB: 19
DG: I was close haha
HB: And you, what do you do?
DG: I study blabla

Some small talk. I was little nervous, but not that much. She was smiling, maybe she was also nervous.

She’s an ex of a guy I know from this summer.
I didn’t understand how can you be just friends with someone you were something more, she said it was just teenage romance, nothing more.

I remembered how it was during this summer, how much I miss that freedom.

HB: Strange times, you can’t meet anyone now...
DG: We could grab beer sometime. Or even better, you can come by and hang with me and my roommates.

(Why did I say that? In my mind I just wanted to lower the resistance to the idea of directly coming over to my place. Was that the right call? I don’t know...)

HB: I would like to do that thanks. How do we do this, social media, phone number?
DG: I prefer phone number.

I get out my phone.

DG: You can put your number here.
HB: I will just call myself, so I get yours.

I then noticed her natural long nails, talked about how I want to get mine polished, she thought its a cool idea. I said I will come pick up that jacket when I have more money and wished her well.

Wrote her the standard

“hi its dg from xy store, so you can save me ”

anyways. She replied after 30min.

“did it ”

Looks solid.

 

[Don Giovanni]

I wrote HBBordeaux past weekend if she had a cigarete. She was on the roof smoking a joint and invited me to join. I didn’t game her besides escalating touch as possible.

Her sister called her, where she was and she promised her she will be home after 20min. I invited her for coffee the next day and made it seem like she wanted to come. She did actualy.

I ended that hang, saying I have to go and she hugged me.

The next day she came with her sister. I did some sexual humor, they bot laughed. Although she seemed awkward and her sister seemed more into me, touching me and investing. She has a boyfriend lol. Ended that hang before they had to go also.

Yesterday my friend, roommates boyfriend asked me to write her for cigaretes. I told him he can write her himself on ig. She gave him tobacco. Next day she dm-ed him if were up for a hang.

Fuck. Exactly what I didn’t want to happen.

I wanted to invite her for a walk this weekend and make a move. But now I have to play this social circe game.

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[Don Giovanni]

17.12.

As I wrote before, HBBordeaux was coming to hang to our place. I was just off work and came home tired around 20.00. They were drinking wine.

My concern was not to fall into the friend zone. My plan for the evening was to game the whole group, than take that energy and bring it to her. Escalate touch from platonic to romantic.

And I did all of that. I was sitting beside her the whole evening. Forced myself to be more positive and uplifting and it worked. Than turned that energy torwards her.

We were talking about bunch of different things and honestly I dont remember. I remember we were talking about a movie which she suggested me to watch the other day, The Dreamers. Very sexual movie. So I wanted to turn that into sex talk, but she wasn’t receptive to it.

One thing I noticed is that its a lot easier to do sex talk and frame control and whichever technique when the girl is attracted to you. Other times I feel like I’m trying to convince her something, which just feels off.

I got drunk. We all got drunk. It was pretty wild to be honest. My other roommate out of the blue decided that he wants to get naked and wear just his apron. That was pretty hilarious.

I wanted to try some palmistry with HBBourdeaux, so I asked her to give me her hand. She declined and I was like wtf. Its understandable though, it was pretty out of context, I just said it.

Around midnight I got tired. And mixing white and red wine I got sick. So I went to the toiled and forces myself to vomit. After that I felt a lot better. Dodged a hangover there. But I didn’t look myself in the mirror... I had a stain on my sweater.

My roommate noticed that and asked me if I puked. I just made fun from it, that I’m such a pig haha. And it worked. After seeing my other roommate dancing half naked, nothing could be over the top.

She said she was going to bed after that a million times. I started to make fun from her, go to bed already. She got up at least 3 times and sat back down and rolled herself another cigarette.

I just wanted to go to bed at that point. When we were finaly saying goodbye and she was hugging everyone, I wanted to kiss her on the cheek and tell her to kiss me. But then I did the cringiest shit... My reflexes were slow and when I hugged her, I did that in such a way I couldn’t reach her cheek. But I kissed her anyway. On her neck!

I didn’t say anything and she didn’t say anything. It was like nothing had happened. I’m wondering if she was wierded out, was she cool with it or also too drunk to realize what just happened... Either way, she must have gotten a clue that I want her as something more than a friend. So thats good.

Another thing I remember she said was something about her ex who cheated on her and kept a two paged list of all the girls he shagged. Which I find hard to believe that a 23-25 year old dude would have triple diggit lay count. Or maybe hes a pua lol.
Jokes aside, she has a history of alfa guys, thats something to take note of.

18.12. LR

I was out with my friends and we were drinking. Someone wanted to buy a sixpack and I offered myself to go get it; due to covid restrictions a limited number of people are aloved to be in store.

I had to wait in line in front of the store. I chated up this girl who was also waiting. She was cute-ish, couldn’t tell for sure because of her mask. A 6-7 if you need to put a number on it.

We just continued chating when we got in the store and I said I will help her buy her things and that I enjoy talking to her.

But something was off with her. I mean, she looked ok, but her clothes were old. Maybe she just jumped out of the house to buy somethings. And she was drinking. Had her bottle of vodka with her. Her self esteem was the lowest I’ve seen in a while. Always apologizing... When I told her that I enjoy talking to her, she asked me if I’m serious and why... In my mind I’m wondering wtf is going on here...

She said she will be leaving next day to Scotland. She wants to start her life there, she lost her job here. Which is not that uncommon in these times bdw. She’s 26 years old.

When we got her things I just sugested she can tag along with my friends. We were going to one friends appartment and they were calling me whats taking me so long. They were cool with her coming along.

She was always asking me if I’m sure she wont be a burden, if I’m sure I want to take her with me... To be honest, I didn’t have any intentions, I just miss meating new people and nightlife and this was close to it.

I introduce her to my friends and we exchange names. They all get along, which is good and she seems to be having a good time, so I’m happy for her.

We were just drinking, talking and dancing a little at the appartment. Nothing special. She was obviously into me, but I wasn’t feeling it. She had second thoughts about me bringing her to spend a night with us, like she’s just a object of fun for us, that we’re way too cool for her... Low self esteem.

My friend Mat talked me into it. Its not like I wasn’t horny, its just I didn’t want to do anything that I would later regret or hurt anybody. She seemed fragile.

So I did. I isolated her to another room but the host threw us out. No fucking in that appartment apparently. So we got a cab and drove to my place. Its 2am at this point.

Thats pretty much it.

She left before I woke up.

I didn’t need to game her at all. All I had to do was tell her that I like her, because she didn’t believe me. I don’t know how I feel about all that yet. I have some moral second thoughts... I need to let it all sink in.

 

[Don Giovanni]

30.12.

A couple of things happened in past week.

HBBordeaux, persistance and friendzone frame battles

I had HBBordeaux alone at my place yesterday. We drank wine, talked, I showed her my music. Things got wilder as the evening went by. I invited her to dance with me as we listened to music on my hi-fi, but she was resistant. I had to order her to stand up 3 times. It goes back to beginning actually.

I first wanted to throw a party, but everyone except her hadn't had the time. She was hesitant and needed an extra push.

That just continued through the evening. With dancing. Then she wanted to frame me as a friend a couple times ''i don't see you in such a way'' ''i can't be just another girl''.... I told her about the one night stand from the previous post. Boosted my social proof (she has a history with alphas, i think), but lowered thrust.

Back to the topic, she was impressed by my music. After that we joked, looked at some porn dvds I have (just looked, not played them). Then she wanted to leave but she herself proposed we could go for a quick walk. Mind you, its police hour.

I don't know how it came to it, but we agreed to jump out from my window. I live in the floor of my building. I jumped but then she got scared haha. I tried to persuade her, but she was to scared (it was at a height of 1,5m). Climbed back in and we used the door hahah.

She said we're not going to see this abandoned building, about which I talked, but I just walked and she went with it. When we got there, of course she was blown away by it. Its a huge building, 500 square meters and it gives you Bonnie and Clyde moment when you bring girls there. She was literally jumping and running around in excitement there. I took the opportunity and hugged her I think...

Then she got tired again... Had a short frame battle again if we should go check out the upper floors. I won but it got tiring.

As we got to our place (again we live in the same building) i kissed her on the cheek and then told her to kiss me back. Again a couple of times... She said she's tired and that I'm getting annoying. I turned her attention elsewhere immediately, then said goodbye and that was it.

The whole evening was a course in persistance from my point of view. I mean, I didn't think she would come to my place at all. But I went a step too far at the end, thats just the part of learning I guess. No harm.

I think there awaits me a long frame battle with her. She wants to frame me as a friend, sees such value in me. Every time something like that happens, I turn attention elsewhere, change topics and then proceed later. When I go about asserting my frame I just repeat my suggestions, almost order her to do something and stare her dead in the eyes not flinching. She usually agrees.

I must make my frame more inviting, note to self.

Strike the iron when its hot

Next, my text exchange with the chick from the store is on life support system haha. The week in between christmas was just enough that we forgot how we even look. I tried to call her, but failed. I will text her again next week, I have other plans currently and will post the text convo here when it comes to conclusion.

Tomorrows plans

Its new years eve tomorrow. I think its overrated. I got invited to this fancy coke fueled party, a lot of ''cool'' people there, which is why I'm hesitant about it. I hate coke. It's just tiring being there and trying to hold up your image. Holding a facade. So I tried to throw my own party, but everyone has plans already (ladida) so I'm going there it seems. Either way I'm going to party tomorrow.

Will post about it.

Cheers.

 

[Don Giovanni]

31.12.

I had 10 people over at my place, then we went to this party I wrote about earlier.

It was great. Everyone was there, I knew almost everybody. After shaking hands and saying hi to higher value guys there (trap producers, singer of a rock band) I saw my social proof growing, people thinking who is this guy. It was great. For 5 min. Then the security came, threatening to call the police (there was 40 people - legal restrictions to 6).

I felt bad for my friend, who I brought with me uninvited. His girlfriend texted him that evening that shes not feeling well and will stay home, so he contacted me. Guess who we found at that party? Yap, her.

I had a plan to not get drunk, so I could game that party. But since that went to hell that plan went to hell with it.

We went to a friends place after that. The 10 people that were at my place before that. There was a couple, trans guy with a pretty girl. I saw that girl from my peripheral vision checking me out before and that only escalated there. At one point the girl walked over to me and said ''why are you so attractive dg!''. I was already drunk so my brain didn't work as it should.

I tried to refrain myself from doing any moves, but I just couldn't do it. We danced, there were sexual undertones, but nothing really happened. His boyfriend was sitting 1m away... I feel bad for him.

On a side note, I went to their place after that to return some things they left at my place. That girl was flirting with me heavily even that day!
I mean, as much I feel bad for the guy, this chick is poisonously hot. I don't know what I'm going to do... Half of me wants to fuck her brains out, half of me wants to be moral...

Back to the story, the host of the party called that we can come back. Everyone left after security came and there were only 10 of them left. So we went back to their place.

At that time I was smashed drunk. I don't remember anything... It looks like I was half unconscious drunk dancing there and hitting on all the guys girlfriends for 5h straight! I was embarrassed when I heard this the next day... Everyone said I was funny and no offence was taken, so that's all good.

Concluding this, one of my new years resolutions is to not get that smashed again.

4.1. Another Guy's Girl

My friend Matt called me. They were going to another guys place. A waiter in a good restaurant, every time I saw this guy around he was with the hottest of girls. So I wanted to see his vibe, his game, even though I didn't want to drink (after new years eve story).

It was hard not to drink that night, especially when you're being poured whiskey in your glass every 15min and verbally pressured into it. But I did it, I didn't get drunk. And it payed of!

So this waiter guy called his fuckbuddy and Matt called his ex coworker girl. As we were drinking, I kept an eye on waiters girl. I didn't look at her, I didn't talk to her, I just made sure I wasn't qualifying. At all.

After 30min she started looking at me. As someone made a joke, she looked at me like she wanted my approval, if you know what I'm talking about. I just did a mental note of that.

I was playing with sub communication. There are just that little moments when 2 people look at each other with lust in their eyes and smiles. I can't explain whats really going on. I have to explore that further.

The waiter kept drinking. I was still waiting for his game, but all he did was escalate the touch on his girl while she was looking at me lol. Finally he got too drunk. He went to bed. Maybe just wasn't his day.

The girl then started asking me questions and grabbing my thigh. It was getting hot. Than she said we should go somewhere else. I got the clue and said we're going to my place. Then she started acting funny giving me her phone and begging me to put my number in it. I was non chalant about it as I didn't get the hint. She was surprised as I declined her a couple of times.

I got it when we were putting our shoes on and she said she will stay with the waiter. She didn't want to be rude I guess... So I gave her my number and we went.

At my place she texted me how far are we. I gave her the address, but she didn't came. Whatever...

I texted her today that she should come over.

dg: hey, you should come over for a glass of wine if you have any time today
hb: hey damn, i have to do work for school today... can we do another day?
dg: mhmmm....
dg: what day did you have in mind
hb: mhmm... i'm busy till friday, but after than anytime actually
dg: monday parties have their price haha
dg: cool, saturday will do

---------------------------
Happy 2021 everybody!

 

[Don Giovanni]

I moved to a new city of 2 million and have been day gaming mostly but also doing solo sober night game. I've been keeping a journal of infields for the past month, so I thought why not post some here. Here they are.

 

[Don Giovanni]

26.9. Day Game

Missed two good opportunities at the park. One was laying on the grass faced down, so I couldn’t see her face, so I made an excuse for myself, the other was little taller than me and had a under chin. I wasn’t sure if I liked them.

I went to the castle site. Again I missed out on a girl sitting by herself on a bench.

SET 1

Then I saw a 3 set, one girl I found particulary appealing. I positioned myself near them and pretended I was texting. Then looked at the girl.

I like your style

Thank you!

You remind me of someone but I don’t know who, I have it on the tip of my tongue… You’re tourists?

Yes, we’re from turkey.

Her friends needed to translate to her, she didn’t speak good English.

You two look Turkish, but you don’t.

She had lighter skin and ginger hair. Was dressed in a rock style, a bad girl touch to her.

What do I look like?

You look elvish haha

They laughed at last remark. Everything I said was first translated by her friends and I was thinking this is going nowhere, so I wished them a good day. Looking back I should have persisted and closed the set.

On my way back, riding a bicycle I saw a girl wearing cool pants, overall she had a nice figure. As I rode past her I said I love your pant, she said thank you! We were all amused and laughed. She was walking with her mother though haha.

SET 2

I was meeting my classmates for a drink. 30min being there, a cute girl came to the bar with a guy. She looked at me, I looked at her, it was an obvious AI.

Thinking about it, I decided to wait until we finish our drink, my conservative classmates go out, I go to the bathroom, then on my way out stop by her table and number close her. Waiting made me nervous. Kind of like waiting in front of the classroom for the test, but once you get the test nervousness goes away.



Excuse me. (to her friend)

I leaned down, so I was on the same level as them.

You look AMAZING. (to her)

When delivering this generic compliment I make sure I look her straight in her eyes, accent the AMAZING part and add a slight grin on my face. She blushed, got a huge smile and thanked me. Then I talked to her friend.

She is 16.

Oh shit, no!

Yes…

I thought you were older.

Well… sorry.

Then to her.

Then just take it as a compliment. Enjoy your night!

Fuck. I need to be careful, get better at assessing peoples age.

27.9. Day Game

After classes I went walking around town, 16.00.

SET 1

She was walking slowly through the crowded city centre street.

Excuse me…

Yes?

You look AMAZING.

Thank you! with a smile

Where are you going?

Oh, I’m just shoe shopping.

I just ordered a pair of shoes myself, I couldn’t get my size in all the shops… run star hikes, you know them?

No.

Well, what ever. I’m DG.

HB.

Excuse me?

HB.

HB. Like panda?

her name sounded very simmilar to the word panda, but I would rather not use real names or places here

Yes, kind of haha

Hope you don’t eat eucalyptus haha

I stuttered the last word. My nerves were showing.

Maybe I will try it sometime.

So HB, I’m kind of nervous I don’t do this usually. Would you like to go for a coffee sometime?

You’re cute… but I have a boyfriend. Sorry.

Ok, then enjoy you’re shoe shopping.

I enjoyed the energy from that set and she thought I’m cute. That’s not that bad I guess.

SET 2

I didn’t want to go home just jet, so I decided to go and find another set. I saw a girl walking in a fast manner towards me. I remembered Fog’s 4m approaching theory – it works!

Excuse me…

Yeah?

You look GORGEUS.

(smiled, but…) I’m in a hurry.

Hey, wait for a second!

She actually stopped for a moment then remembered that she’s in a hurry.

Sorry, I really need to get home.

There was a good self amusing energy to this set, we we’re both laughing at the absurdity of the situation.

I take this as progress, normally I wouldn’t stop her. I credit this to 4m distance, smile, tone of voice and self amusing energy.



28.9. Day Game

5 sets, most for 1 day until now. You have to think in terms of 1 set at a time. Even doing 2 sets seems to much, but 1 set is manageable.


SET 1

Rich part of the town. Hot, beautiful and well dressed girl in her late 20s, earphones in her ears. Think 4m distance, policeman stop, smile, tone of voice and self amusing.

Excuse me…

Yes?

You look AMAZING.

She smiled but dismissed me...

Thank you! Have a nice day.

Wait, where are you going?

Bye!

Ok… That threw me off balance.

SET 2

I needed some time before I recovered from that rejection.

Before you start feeling your instincts, you need to just relax. Meditate imagining your breaths going down to your walking feet and back up and practice being aware of your environment. Look for approach opportunities in the far distance, before they notice you.

IMPORTANT

When you’re looking for targets girls notice that and dismiss you. But if you look dreamy, lost in your thoughts, maybe even looking down, a lot of girls will check you out. They get a chance when they think you’re not looking.

That goes against the notion of looking alpha, always having your chin up… Any ideas why?

This one was in the city centre. Taller, long straight blonde hair, trench coat, beautiful freckled face.

Excuse me…

Yes?

You look GORGUES.

Thank you! (smiled)

Where are you going?

I’m going to theatre school.

Oh… An actor!

She was obviously in a hurry.

I’m also in the art fields.

Sorry, I’m going to be late…

Wait, I see that you’re in a hurry. We can do this some other time. What do you say we have a coffee?

Thank you, but I’m 16.

Fuck, not again

You look older.

I get told that, I know.

Ok, take care, bye.

Bye.



SET 3

I wasn’t feeling it today, but I wanted to do my approach goals. I saw this lady walking in front of me, although I didn’t see her I noticed her sense of style, so I decided to walk with her, turn my head and deliver ‘’I like your style’’ pre opener.

Did that, but she was older than I expected. Not pretty at all. I got a weird look on my face, so did she. A small what the fuck moment took place and I walked onwards. Got my momentum.


SET 4

I saw her checking me out. Wearing a trench coat and a sweater, not beautiful, but cute girl.

Hey, excuse me…

Yes? she stopped, didn’t seem in a hurry

Sorry, I just couldn’t resist myself, I had to stop you. You look AMAZING.

Thank you!

I’m DG.

HB.

How old are you?

21.

I forgot most of what happened… She was smiling but wanted to walk away, so I stopped her. We were talking about something, but I can’t remember.

No, stop, where are you going?

She stopped.

Look, maybe we could to this another time. We exchange numbers, maybe text, maybe go for a coffee, maybe get married.

Sorry, but it’s a serious relationship.

So you’re both really serious? playfully looking at her, if she’s being serious

Yes.

Well then, take care, bye!

She kept standing there, like she didn’t exactly know what just happened. I should have number closed her anyway. There was the right type of energy.

SET 5

By this time I was hyped from previous approaches. Nervous excited.

I noticed her checking me out. Not beautiful, but cute girl wearing a coat.

Excuse me…

Yes? she took a step away

Oh sorry, I didn’t want to scare you! smiled

She started laughing. There was nervousness in her laugh.

So… I just wanted to tell you, you look AMAZING and I had to stop you.

Thank you!

Where are you going?

Just home.

The day is full of opportunities… You need to make the most of it.

I guess.

You’re… 21 years old.

No, close. 20.

I’m getting good at this. What do you study.

Law. didn’t say it clearly

You’re in love jokingly misinterpreted it

No haha law.

Oh a lawyer! When you finish you could help me get out of trouble, if I get in to any.

Maybe haha.

Are you nervous? I noticed her body language, her smile was uptight

A little bit. I don’t know you.

I get that it’s not usual meeting people this way. In a way I think this is the more genuine way of meeting people. Everybody is glued to their screens these days, earphones in their ears, not seeing the real world around them

That’s me haha earphones in my ears and not seeing the world around me.

You looked at me.

Yes, I thought I knew you from somewhere.

Look… I promise I won’t steal your kidneys and sell them on the black market. I’m safe.

Why did I say this?

Haha

No, seriously (I tried to make myself calm, get over the excited nervous energy and be in the moment). I get nervous to, you don’t have to be.

Ok, it’s not that bad.

So I’m DG. I came here on Erasmus. I’m the most interesting person you will meet. Here, now you know me.

Haha, ok. I’m HB.

Look, maybe we could catch up some other time. Maybe go for a coffee or something.

I can give you my facebook, but I can’t promise you anything. Depends on how I will feel then.

There’s not pressure, you can do whatever you want.

Then I got closer to her to give her my phone. First time in this set. I tried once before, but she took a step back, so I took a step back to. She gave me her facebook.

Great, then we’ll stay in touch!

Ok, but like I said I can’t promise you anything.



1.10. Night Game

Nothing special happened this night.

I went out at 20h to a grunge concert. The bands were cool, but nothing out of the ordinary. I pre opened a girl, who seemed to be with her friend or a boyfriend, I left that be, then pre opened another girl. Both with something like:

I need a translator for this

In between the songs I asked the girls for the lyrics, the bands were singing in Hungarian. The first girl didn’t speak Hungarian and like I said was with her boyfriend. Second one went like this:

I also don’t understand, sorry

But aren’t you Hungarian

I am. Its my first time here

I new here also

Realy. Where are you from

Then the band started playing, her friend, who she was supposed to meet came and that interaction went to shit. I complimented some girls ear rings, but she seemed very status aware.

It’s a small bar with a small dance floor. There are usually lot of tourists and the people who hang there all the time and have their own social circle thing going. So I try not to mess with that, since they’ve all been super friendly so far.

I missed one opportunity at the bar earlier, there was this girl waiting just behind me, ALONE. I didn’t know what to open with, which is ridiculous. Oh well, anxiety does its thing…

During the break I talked to the couple, which girlfriend I pre opened before. Both nice, had a cool conversation, then went back in. Just that the second time, there was less girls to preopen, the girl from before wasn’t there either.

After the concert I looked around and the bar was packed. There was no way to open any set there without looking obvious. They also stop serving at 22h because of neighbour complains, so I left for another club.

There I get myself an alcohol free beer, check out all three floors and go out to the smoking area. I position myself near two girls then tell them that this place reminds me of a place back in my home country, ask them if I can sit beside. Sure, they say, but then our conversation goes nowhere.

I go back to the bar. I find a seat left, I chill over there and look at the music video my friends just made and sent me. Then a guy and two girls come, telling me I took their table, but I can sit with them if I like.

I start talking to the girl, who is trying to tell me that other friends are going to come and that I should leave. She spoke poor English so maybe that was not exactly what she was trying to communicate.

I told her I just wanted to look at the video my friends made. I asked her if she would like to see it, which she did. I use the music video as a social proof generator, since it shows I have shit going on for myself, I know people who can pull these things off and I kiss a girl in the video, so it paints me in this way.

I watched her attraction spike. Then we got into small talk, she’s a painter and stuff like that. I started with touch, she reciprocated, but then her friends came. I left her talking to her friend for a bit thinking, she would eventually turn back to me. And at first her body language was pointed at me and she looked at me a couple times, but I had to play too cool for school and was on my phone during that time. When I saw she’s getting more invested in the conversation with her friend I just said my goodbye and left. Her look was filled with sorry. I just shrugged my shoulders.

I should have reengaged here there or joined slowly with her friend, she seemed interested and warming up.

I didn’t get more opportunities at that venue that night, so I left.





2.10. Night Game

To get over my initial going out anxiety, I find its useful to just go to a bar and get a drink, alcohol free beer in my case. That way I can relax into it.

After that I went to megaclub. It’s Saturday, midnight and the place is packed. I preopened 3 girls, neither seemed interested and one girl opened me for directions, but when I wanted to take that further she said she had to go. No harsh rejections and I guess I could persist there further, but I got annoyed and left.

I found this cool venue on internet and I decided to check it out.

The first thing that caught my eye was the ratio. There were more females than males, which I got suspicious about. It turned out it was a queer party, which is great, since I’m used to that crowd from back home.

The entrance was expensive, but what the hell. Buy the ticket, get in, leave the coat at the wardrobe and get myself an alcohol free beer. Then I took a walk around the venue, so I get the basic gist of it, who is with who, are there couples and just screen out the bad sets and look for good ones.

I went out where people were smoking. I took a sit on the curb between two groups of people, took my phone out, but soon a group near by engaged me. I think one guy wanted to hit on me, but generally, they were all very nice and friendly (that’s what I like about gay parties, compared to status posturing commercial mega parties).

They made fun of me when I tried pronounce Hungarian words in a way I would tease girls. Told me I’m cute, I don’t mind that. After this group I opened the second group I was sitting in between. Asked for a cigarette, if I remember right.

3 girls, one fat, one not my type and the third fuckable, I liked her energy. They started asking me questions, where I’m from, am I here alone, how come, what do I do? They were impressed by my field of study, complimented my run star hikes and then asked me if I want to go dance with them.

Sure, better dancing with 3 girls, than alone, so I went. They had another group of friends inside, more girls. One was fuckable, one was hot with dreads, matrix type looking girl, you know what I mean, and their drunk but also fuckable friend.

I danced with them. Note here that I’m not the best dancer and I hate the music they play on dance floors usually. But whatever. I’m getting better and better at it, especially when I dance histrionically, to see if I catch the attention of any girl around, since all the other guys are usually stuck up.

Anyway, the drunk chick took a liking at me. We were exchanging dance moves, then she started grinding on me and soon she was in my arms. Only then I noticed she was actually drunk and got turned off. My drunk self would have gone for it, but since I developed a disgust for my past behaviour and drunk people, sober me left her alone.

I was also dancing with the other friend, the blonde girl. There was some touching and some attraction I suppose.

For some girls I feel the attraction in my guts and I know they also feel it, but for other I just start assuming it, when they’re down with my advances. It’s harder to escalate on these girls though, because it’s not coming from instinct, rather intellect.

We then went out for a smoke and we pretty much talked just the two of us, other people left us alone. She told me the drunk girl broke up with her boyfriend and I replied are you trying to hook me up.

You’re not gay, right?

No

So why are you out then?

I just like meeting new people, see where the night is going to take me.

Oh I see, you’re just having fun.

What about you, did you break up with a boyfriend recently? Maybe a girlfriend?

No haha. But yes, I’m bi.

You’ve been with a guy before, right?

Yes.

But he disappointed you, I’m sorry.

No haha It’s just in different places in my life I get attracted to different things. But the most important aspect of this is the soul and bonding with another person.

Sexual energy too, probably.

Yes that too. So you have a girlfriend?

Then I had to tell her a bit about my ex, why we broke up and stuff. We were vibing, but I had difficulty escalating the situation to a more sexual one. Besides these topics, we talked about her work, which is politics, a bit about myself. We went back inside, danced some more and the drunk girl hit on me some more then it looked like she got in to a autorejection. Funny thing seeing these things.

Besides this group I opened a couple other girls. There was this one at the bar, wearing a headband with 2 horn like the devil.

So you’re the devil?

No.

Then what are you?

Just a girl.

A girl with horns?

Something in the lines of, I can’t remember. She looked like she was giving me shit tests, to which I didn’t care. Chit chated a bit, then left. I saw her again an hour later and she helloed me, to which I replied goodbye, since I was leaving.

The there was a petite black - haired girl. I did some boring small talk with her about the venue. Didn’t expect anything back then, so I just left it there. But later I saw her outside and approached her pretty obviously.

How’s your night going.

Good. Yours?

I got tired so I think I’m going to leave soon. I like your nails.

She had each nail painted in different pattern, must’ve took a lot of work. I told her a story about how I got my nails painted one time in a ASAP Rocky way, all white with two eyeballs on index fingers. I also took that chance and held her palm for a bit longer than usual.

I noticed she looked young and since you never know I asked her how old is she.

18

Barely legal

Haha yeah

Listen, you’re really sweet and I would like to meet you again for a coffee or something, since I’m leaving now, because I have shit to do tomorrow.

Ihab, but thanks, that’s really nice of you.

Well I have a cat, but she doesn’t mind

Haha I’m sorry, but I think my boyfriend wouldn’t like that.

So your both serious huh

Yes

My cat is cooler then.

Haha sorry…

Ok, then continue being sweet as you are. Ciao.

There was another girl I opened at the bar. She looked Spanish or Mediterranean.

This music is so weird haha

Yes haha why do you say so

Back in my country they play it in every commercial club, I try to get away from it, come here and same story haha

Haha so what do you listen to

I like rock and classical

You’re at the wrong place then haha

I like meeting people, so I guess not.

We were getting closer to each other and her friend just left us. I had to talk into her ear and my hand ended up around her shoulders or her waist if I remember right. She looked like she enjoyed the validation.

Well, Ihab and I’m drunk.

Again?

I don’t mind the boyfriend, but I don’t like drunk girls so much.

You’re at the wrong place again. You should try libraries, museums or I don’t know, stuff like that.

I am actually, but you don’t need to know that.

I have to leave now.

My time is up huh

I gues haah

Take care

I saw her again later and she helped me with the lady at the wardrobe, because I don’t speak the language.

At the end of the night I got the number of the politic chick. She number closed me, to be precise. I told her we could go out sometime, she agreed.

At 4 in the morning I went home.





3.10. HB Switzerland

I met this girl last week at the bar (there was this small fashion show and a dj later on). She’s taller than me, from Switzerland, has a beautiful face. Specific, but completely my taste. Fun to talk to also.

We talked a lot about music and dance – she’s a contemporary dancer – and exchanged numbers to maybe try something together.

There wasn’t really any tension, too dance/ music oriented frame. Which I don’t mind, since it’s in my interest too to get some colabs, but I would still like to bang her.

Texted her a day after, then we started texting.

On this day, we were supposed to meet at my place to jam and see what happens. She messaged me at 15h that she has time at 16h, but I didn’t see that until 16h, so that went to hell. She then invited me to a performance, which I said yes to, because I had the time anyway.

I way there early. She came, we hugged, small talked. 1st attempt at setting sexual frame:

My apartment has thin walls, which sucks, because I hear everything my neighbour is doing. He likes to snort

At least he’s not having wild sex

Haha, unfortunately I get to hear that also

At least he’s not snoring while having sex then haha

Just awkwardly smiled at the last remark, maybe she didn’t get it. I get some anxiety trying to sexualize conversations, it’s not natural yet for me.

Then the performance started. Nothing special and it was quite uncomfortable sitting on staircase for 45min. I had time to be introspective and I noticed my needy thoughts. What to say to her afterwards, too much planning, imagining things. All the techniques are cool, but it’s not cool to seek approval.

I remember in high school, when I had a crush on this girl who played the flute, I went to her concert and during the concert I was thinking what should I say to her, to come off sophisticated. It came off as stupid as it sounds. It’s the same thing here.

After that there was a talk about the performance not in english. We sneaked out of the venue and decided to get a drink.

She had 1h left before she had another apartment viewing. I let her lead to the bar, since she lives around there and knows her way around better. During our walk we talked about the performance, dance, her near future plans.

She mentioned she has a problem falling asleep during performances (she almost fell asleep during this one) or lectures, which I teased Her about.

I hope you don’t fall asleep on me

Not sure if that was the right call.

We came to the bar, there were not a lot of people, since it was Sunday. She paid for the drinks, then I led to a couch. I us to be in proximity, but she then chose the chair besides the couch.

This is smarter, the couch will make me sleepy

Shot myself in the foot right there.

Physical escalation was out of the game and I had problems escalating verbally.

We talked about dance and music further, she mentioned she couldn’t fall asleep last night. She was listening to this amazing electronic set which made her trip for an hour. Mentioned it was orgasmic (missed opportunity right there).

I showed her a music video with good choreography, then my recently made music video. In it I kiss a girl and generally creates social proof for me. Made it no big deal, but I’m sure it left some effect on her. I also told her I was at this club yesterday dancing with girls until the morning.

The phone is generally a great tool for getting closer to your girl, it’s a legitimate excuse. The best part vibe – wise was when I asked her where she would like to live the most here in Budapest and showed her my favourite spots on her google maps. It felt intimate and warm.

Then she had to leave. I led her back to the plaza, which was on her way. On the way she asked me if I want to have children and I just joked that its too much money spent on child support for my two children back in Slovenia. A joke obviously which she fell for 100%.

General remarks:

Had problems setting sexual frame,

Had problems transitioning from serious art topics to more light hearted topics,

Good implied social proof with music video and dancing with girls,

Good job noticing your neediness during the performance,

I could use push pull or sexual innuendo. Be more aware of my voice and eye contact, since physical escalation wasn’t possible.

I’m way less anxious and dark since I quit drinking one month ago, but there are still traces left. Some anxiety is normal, you could interpret that as excitement. But the needy self - sabotaging thoughts are what must be addressed.

The next step would be naturally feeling lust and sexual tension.

 

[Don Giovanni]

5.10. Day Game

Successful session, although I intended on doing 4, not 3 approaches.

SET 1

On main street, not far away from my uni. She was in her late 20s, dark hair and walking in a slow pace.

Excuse me…

???

I had to stop you and tell you you look AMAZING

Sorry, …?

You speak English?

No… little.

I had the self-amused smile on my face.

YOU…

I use my hand gestures to point at her physique.

BEAUTIFUL.

Thank you!

ME…

Same thing, just pointed at myself.

BEAUTIFUL.

She started laughing. We both did. She then said goodbye and went forward. My guess is she’s taken by a more serious dude and couldn’t speak English anyway. Good warmup though.

SET 2 – number close

I noticed her walking from the metro station into the shopping plaza. She was gorgeous, blonde curly hair, thin waist, long legs. I had to speed up to catch her, I did that just when entering the plaza.

I made sure I walked in front of her for 5 sec, so she could notice me, then slowed down to walk beside her. I turn my head towards her:

You have the most elegant figure, I’ve seen all day.

Thank you!

I really mean that. You seem to achieve a lot with so little. (I meant clothes, make up…)

That really means something to me. Thank you!

I guess I’m kind of nervous doing this… Whatever. Where are you going?

Oh… I’m going shoe shopping.

Excuse me? (couldn’t hear her because of the noise)

Shoe shopping. I’m going to buy a new pair of boots, although I don’t need to.

Looks like you have shoe addiction.

No, it’s not like that, I’m not addicted

tried to save her face, although I was just teasing her

I’m kidding don’t worry. I just bought a new pair of shoes myself, it’s never enough

I pointed to my shoes, converse run star hikes.

Cool shoes. My friend has a pair of those as well.

I couldn’t find the here in mens sizes, so I had to order them. Seems like men here are to macho masculine to wear sneakers like these haha

Haha maybe

Whats your name?

HB.

HB? (difficoult names here haha)

HB, with an B. (lol)

Nice to meet you, I’m DG.

We then stopped at her store.

This is my store.

Ok. I would like to meet you for a coffee some time, what do you say?

… I almost have a boyfriend…

Haha what does almost mean? Tell you what. We don’t need to get married or anything, just a coffee. I enjoy meeting new people and you seem like a sweet girl.

Yes that sounds good.

Facebook, phone number?

Let me give you my phone number.

I gave her my phone.

Cool. Enjoy your shoe shopping?

Thank you, you to!

I hugged her and went my way.

I sent her the icebreaker the same day, then another text the next day, no reply. Was she just being nice?

SET 3 – number close

Near my apartment building. I was carrying groceries and toilet paper. She walked towards me. Wanted to go to a shop, but the shop was closed. That was when we were on the 4m distance, so I made my policeman stop:

Excuse me…

I scared her a bit – we start laughing.

I just wanted to tell you, that you look most elegant today. The colour combination matches perfectly with your hair. And I didn’t mean to scare the shit out of you haha

Haha Thank you

Good so where are you going?

Oh… just going somewhere. I was just checking if the store is open.

Looks like you will have to go to the next store. Somewhere to your boyfriend (teasing, but I don’t know why I said that)

No, actually there’s this school party I’m going to.

Cool. What do you study?

Medicine.

I live right around the corner here. I noticed there are medical schools or something around here. Is that where?

No, that is the student home, I live there.

So we’re practically neighbours!

Haha yes.

You could show me around.

Haha

I’m DG bdw.

HB.

Nice to meet you HB…

I notice her necklace that has girl written on it.

… girl.

Haha. So where are you from?

I’m from ______, the land of _____ and _____ (a joke)

I was just there this summer!

Really? How did you like it?

We went rafting in _____ national park.

In ____ probably, there are these adrenaline parks. It can be beautiful. Look, I’m not going to hold you any longer, but we should get drinks sometime.

Sure.

How do we do this. Phone number, facebook, mail?

Haha I can give you my Instagram.

No… I have a shit ig, but I will start posting soon and I will give you my ig then, so I prefer something else..

Ok. I can give you my phone number.

Cool, type it in here…

Done.

Don’t get wasted tonight!

Haha I won’t

Bye

Bye

I should have ask her more personal stuff, it’s all very surface lever small talk stuff, which is good for where I was, but I can go one level further.

Texting was shit, went like this:

Hey, glad I’m finaly meeting some neighours – DG (same day, after I came home)

No reply.

Hey, are you hungover (next day afternoon)

Heyy no, I just had a lot to do in school today (a day later)

Do you like going to school (8h later)

Well, sometimes yes someties no. Btw is it possible if I saw you yesterday with a green luggage or I just messed it up (one day later)

It was me actually. I just won the lotto (wtf righ?!) and I was carring the cast around in that luggage (6h later, Friday evening)

Haha very funny (1h later)

Haha don’t believe me? Let me take you to canary islands then (Saturday noon)

If I see it I believe it:’D (15min later)

We could go for a drink first, see if I make you believe (15min later)

No reply. I will text her again on Monday evening if she doesn’t reply by then.

6.10. Day Game

Wort noting that I was social the whole day. I talked to this guy in the copy shop, talked to my teacher at the uni. At crosswalk I commented, when I saw a girl carrying a dog in her backpack that he’s got the best seat in the house (she wasn’t attractive, just being social).

It was a rainy day so I didn’t expect too many opportunities.

SET 1

I saw a girl in a vegan restaurant I like to go to. She was seated by herself and was looking at her phone. I couldn’t remember any non awkward way of approaching her, so I sat near the place where people put away their plates after they finish, but I missed that opportunity too, she was completely distracted and was looking in the other direction, while I was nervous because of overthinking this approach for 10min.

She went out in a rush, and I though this is it, but I saw her again at the crossroad. We were at the opposite sides of the road and in the middle there is a platform for people waiting for trolley bus, so I stopped her there, in the middle, while the middle traffic light was still red.

Excuse me..

She put her earphones out.

I wanted to tell you you look so elegant. I love your shirt. I saw you before in the restaurant, but I didn’t want to bother you while eating.

Thank you

I got a smile on her face

So, where are you going?

I’m searching for some food (is she tying to get fat???)

Are you not full already?

No, I just need to buy something.

The traffic light got green.

Mind if I walk with you for a moment?

No, I’m tired…

You sure, just for 5min?

No, thank you.

Ok, take care then!

Bye.

What was this about? Seemed delighted to get the compliment, but refused the smallest compliance.

SET 2 – instadate with HB18

I saw her walking towards me, I liked her hippie – rock – ish style, blonde hair and physique. She took a turn in to the trift shop before I could stop her on the street.

I stopped and said to myself fuck it, went in to the trift shop.

I look at the clothes near where she was. I positioned myself near her, chose the most ridiculous looking purple coat/ dress thing and asked her what she thinks about it.

Looks good.

Haha you serious?

Why not?

Looks good if I’m a 18th century upper class lady going to sleep haha

Haha… So what are you looking for?

Nothing special… I just wanted to meet you. I’m DG.

I’m HB18.

Nice to meet you. How are you doing?

Not that good. I was just meeting a friend… an ex boyfriend… and I was hoping to lift my spirits in this store, maybe I find something.

That sucks, I get you. So lets not talk about your ex and go find you something.

We went around looking at the different clothes, which I wasn’t that into. I was thinking more of her, how to continue this interaction, what to do, what to say. I should have been more in the moment.

Made her guess what I study, completely missed it and then when I told her was impressed by it.

The conversation slowly faded and I didn’t want to be a leech, so I took a look at the mens department. Later came back, asked her what she’s up to and if she would like to go for a coffe, she agreed. I told her I don’t feel particularly inspired right now, so I’m just going to wait out side and write some email on my phone, she agreed.

I had to wait her for 15min, thinking what the fuck and just as I wanted to go back in, she came out, apologized for making me wait.

I took her to a place near my apartment with the close in mind. On our way I asked her for her age, she looked young. Fortunately 18. Then travel, she is a well travelled person for her age.

We get to the caffe, look at the menu together, which I took opportunity to get closer to her with my chair. Order, I pay, told her she’s going to next time.

She was interested in my study and my work a lot, she didn’t stop asking questions. Since I’m passionate about what I do, I didn’t mind talking about that. At one point though I teased her that this is starting to look like an interview than turned it back around at her.

I tried to encourage her artistic tendencies and give her some courage for choosing a field that is not paid well. She is not completely decided on what she wants to do further in her life, a young persons curse. I ensured her everything is going to be fine.

On the more playful side, I looked at her rings and she seemed comfortable with my touch, so I held her hand a little longer and moved my thumb briefly on her palm to let her know my intentions. Then I teased her about her cheat sheet, she had written on her forehand and held her forearm.

I said to her to stop smiling like that, reminds me of my ex…

Sorry, I’m going to stop

Yes, I want you to be miserable haha

Haha I can’t, you make smile, it’s your fault!

At one point I began feeling sexual tension between us. First time for me to take things to this level at this hour in the afternoon with a complete stranger.

I seeded the pull a couple times casually in between what I was saying - I have to show you my music some time, later I can show you how you do this and this (about my work), I live just around the corner…

She was waiting for her sister. At the end when her sister didn’t pick up her phone, I asked her what is she going to do? She said she’s just going to go to her apartment and her sister will open her.

Or you can go to my apartment and I can show you my music, just for 15min or so. She said she sorry, I’m not comfortable with that.

She was 18, I could see she wasn’t that experienced and we had some tension going before. She got scared, it was a completely new experience for her…. Or looked like it.

We then left the coffee shop. I asked her for her contact info, she gave me her facebook. I was disappointed, I admit.

She thanked me for the coffee and making her day better (her ex made her feel shitty before). That made my heart warm. I told her she can write me if she would like to hang out, then we said goodbye.

The next day I wrote her on messenger how the thing she said at the end about making her day better meant a lot to me and how’s she doing.

She didn’t reply, didn’t even see the message. Maybe she doesn’t even use messenger that much… Whatever.

7.10. HB Switzerland

She texted me if we’re still up for today, I said sure.

We met at my place. Usually the beginnings of interactions feel awkward for me, especially if it’s the first interaction of the day, but this one felt natural. I teased her the moment I saw her for taking the elevator to 1st floor instead of the stairs, the hugged her.

Then I showed her my appartement and went to take a piss. We small talked. She saw a book on my table and started reading it. The book was in my mother language, it was quite funny to listen to her pronouncing it with her French accent. I got closer to her, then read the paragraph in my language and then told her what she just read. The book was The Tropic Of Cancer and the paragraph was about a man contemplating his girl and the girls bush and how they relate to each other haha.

Then we basically improvised, me on guitar, her dancing. It was fun. There were 3 30min sessions, with breaks for coffee and we talked about what we’re doing and what we like and don’t like.

We looked at each other a couple times in between, she was enjoying it a lot. But nothing sexual or anything like that.

After that she had to pick up a bike, and I didn’t feel like escalating, there was again this time constraint.

I just told her how cutely fluffy she is with her fur coat, messy hair, then fixed her collar, hugged her and said goodbye.

We texted after that:

I sent her the video I recorded of her dancing, me playing guitar, so we could analyse it later

Thanks

Theres some good stuff in this! I posted some cuts on my ig story, hope you don’t mind

Ahaha so weird to see myself. Ahaha not really but not everything is good. It’s fine! But maybe ask me next time. But don’t worry.

Deal

The bike was not my size… ahahaha I am going back

That sucks haha

40min later

My dancer friends like the story, so you don’t have to worry about it

Ahaha cool no but I really don’t worry haha

Ill make you famous

Haha yes please. I’m really really bad for that. I almost don’t post anything about dance. I hate selling myself.

It is a weird feeling selling yourself yes. When I was at my lowest I hat to give this guy a handjob so I could pay my rent. But its better now.

What exactly did I want to achive with this text haha

She texted back 1h later

Ahahah you had to ‘’sell’’ yourself

Just kidding

I really hoped it was a joke

That’s me haha giving handjobs and paying child support hahah

Ahahaha yeah for your 2 kids

Exactly

I’m not sure if I should text her or invite her to some event, to jam again or what. I want it to be more than just creating together, but I want to create together also and I don’t want to fuck that up. She also studies contemporary dancing, so she has a lot of contemporary dancer friends. That is a big plus.

I think about showing her my cards, because she’s not making me an easy time making moves. If she rejects me I tell her it’s fine, I still want to work with you, I see value in that if you’re up for it.

I have to think about that…

8.10. Day Game

I’m wearing black jeans, black Chelsea boots, blue sweater and black overshirt. I had 2 approaches in mind before getting home.

SET 1 – instadate with HB Italy

I was waiting in line in the copy shop. The girl in front of me looked cute, so why not chat her up? I noticed she was printing children songs:

You’re a musician?

No. These are for kids, I study pedagogy.

Can I take a look?

Sure, but its all just notes.

No problem, I can read that.

I looked at the book.

So what do you play?

Guitar.

The conversation flowed naturally, we talked a bit about teaching kids. I gave a compliment to her glasses, then jokingly asked if I can try them.

They don’t look bad.

Really? So I’m as sexy as you now?

Haha

Talked some more about teaching kids. She asked me by my name and we introduced. I asked her what she’s doing now, proposed a cup of tea, to which she agreed.

She has curly dark brown hair, cute face, banging body. Looks Italian. Funny thing when picking her up, we we’re the only people besides the girls who was working in the copy shop. She warmed up to me and started laughing to my small remarks like I’m sorry my handwriting is so bad, when I wrote her my email so she could send me the pdfs. God, social proof feels good to my ego.

She chose the coffee shop, since she lives nearby. We ordered tea, talked some more about teaching. I shared a few my experiences, she shared why she wanted to become a teacher. Light deep diving.

When she said how she’s addicted to coffee, I shared my thoughts on that. I was thinking the other day how we’re all addicted to one thing or another. Drinking, gambling, sex, food, information, work, working out, choose your poison. My question about that is, what are we running from? Sometimes it seems like we’re just hamsters, the world being one big hamster wheel.

It’s our one chance to live, but we decide to survive instead of live. Doing all that knowing that what we’re doing is not right.

After that I went if you could choose one place in time and history, which would you choose?

She chose the 50s, after war. Good choice, a time filled with optimism. A lot of sex also, since all the men came back from war.

That was the peak of our conversation, I felt her warming up to me, I felt I dragged her into my fantasy world.

After that small talk, I showed her my music video, she liked it, but nothing more. I realised then I can not escalate this situation further, so I said that I have to go, because I have some stuff to do back at home.

I payed, told her she’s paying the next time. We exchanged facebook and I asked her, do Italians kiss on the cheek, when they say goodbye. She said they only show, but don’t really kiss, so we did that. It was a little awkward, but no damage done I hope.

When I got home I sent her glad to meet you text on messenger, didn’t read, no reply.

I will text her Monday evening.



SET 2

She was standing on the corner, earphones in her ears. I positioned beside her, looked at my phone, then turned towards her waved her, she took her earphones out.

I like your style . You’re really made up today.

Thank you.

She smiled but didn’t look completely comfortable, in a hurry more so.

Where are you going right now?

Sorry, I can’t right now, I’m in a hurry.

No worries, I’m going in the same direction.

No, I really have to run.

Then run, no worries.

She walked in front of me for 15m then turned left to a university building, looks like she was late for a class. Since I was just off one insta date I wasn’t in a mood for another really, I had to finish some work back at home.

Night game

I went out around midnight. Black chelseas, skinny black jeans, black and white striped shirt over a black t shirt and a black coat. Hit the city centre, party district or more tourist district tbh.

This night sucked. I didn’t even get to any of the clubs. All had entrance fees worth to much, which I wasn’t prepared to pay for music that will probably suck and approach opportunities I don’t know I will get. Or they had lines in which I would wait 45min.

I went into a bar, but just chilled there, playing with my phone, no real opportunities.

Chatted with 2 guys on the street, they were in a similar situation as I.

And that was it haha.

Next time have events ready for the weekend before you go, planned out in advance with plan bs. Fuck the super popular clubs on weekends, but go in them during the week, when they are not packed.

9.10. Night game

Exercised, meditated, drank green tea and hit cold shower before going out around midnight.

I went to a event, which seemed to have good djs playing, type of stuff that would interest me.

Came to the venue. Gallery, art exhibition space with occasional events. Main floor down stairs, 2 bars in ground floor and a smoking area.

I took a walk around, then went to the dance floor. It was too dark for me to see the people or screen, but the music turned out to be really good. Probably the best electronic concert I’ve been this year.

I wanted to check out the venue, see the scene around here. I’m beginning to see some regular faces, guys who are the centre of these circles. Important, because I don’t want to fuck up my reputation before I even get one. It would be best to meet them at some point.

I was dancing, throwing random comments about music at people near by, going up for a smoke and I got a drink at the bar.

Since I was dancing most of the time, the only real approach was in the smoking area, two girls, one not attractive, one super hot:

Hey, could I ask one of you for a cigarette?

Yes, sure. You don’t speak Hungarian?

No.

Where are you from?

__________. I moved here one month ago.


Some small talk. While the super hot girl was nice and asking questions, her body language wasn’t completely turned to me. The unattractive girl didn’t like me so much, since I didn’t give her so much attention. They just met, so she wasn’t her friend.

Then I went dancing again. Again came up for a smoke, met a girl and a guy, wasn’t attracted, just talked to them for the sake of being social.

Then the super hot girl came to the smoking area, came to me, said hey. It was late by now, 3 in the morning. We started talking but there was no energy. Her body language was half open, she just wanted to be social. Kept saying how tired she is from dancing and I think she was a bit drunk.

Then the dj ended his set, the party was over and our conversation died. She said she’s going back to her friends, asked me what am I going to do then said goodbye. It was a very polite rejection.

I could have ended the conversation earlier, when you saw it coming to a close and asked her for a contact info. Could’ve intrigued her more. I don’t have strategies ready for such scenarios, so maybe that wouldn’t be a bad idea.

 

[Don Giovanni]

11.10.

I overslept, due to nightlife's fucked biorhythm. Didn't eat any breakfast, just went straight to classes. When I parked my byke I saw a girl standind at the bus stop and decided to approach. I was wearing run star hikes, black jeans, black t with a cool graphic (https://www.jazzmessengers.com/23788-large_default/the-boston-record-with-the-4th-dimension.jpg), beige over shirt and white leather jacket.

SET 1

I positioned myself in front of her. Typing something on my phone, I turn towards her. My heart rate was still up and breathing fast, due to cycling, and I was already 5min late to class:

Hey, I like your coat

Thanks!

Normally this kind of green would be cringe, but you pull it of. So where are you going?

To school, just waititng for my bus.

Yeah? What do you study?

Psychology. You?

I was in a rush. Normally I would tease her that I’m afraid she’s going to analyse me and see all my darkest secrects, make her guess what I’m studying, but I was in a hurry.

I study just around the corner. Actually my classes already started and I’m late, but I really wanted to meet you. What do you say we go for a coffee sometime?

Ihab.

Oh, ok then. Have a nice day!

Have a nice day!



I just rushed to my uni then. It felt rushed but apart from that, not that bad. I think it came out confident.

SET 2

Eating at the vegan restaurant. A girl comes and sits one table away from me, starts reading a book and eating.

I like your style

Thanks or something like that, she mumbled

What are you reading?

She either didn’t understand or ignored me on purpose. Either way, I left her alone and continued eating my lunch.

SET 3

She was standing on the side of the street with a phone and a book in her hand. Colourful coat, blonde pretty hair and taller than me. When I came near and pretended to look for something on my phone she turned away, but I continued anyway.

Hey, do you know where the museum is?

What?

The museum

The museum. It is behind this corner, if you go…

Actually, I know where it is. I wanted to tell you I love your coat, you look beautiful in it.

Thank you.

Delighted, but not surprised…

Wait, how old are you?

Just noticed her face looked young. She didn’t have the cleanest skin and I realised I’m not that attracted.

19.

Ok. You are waiting for somebody?

No… Actually yes, I'm supposed to meet my friend.

I just came from uni, now I'm going home.

You study here (there are universities near by)

No, in the centre. _______ uni.

Ok.

Then she looked distracted… I didn't know what to say.

I'm DG.

HB.

Nice to meet you.

She again looked on the phone, like something happened.

You look like you're in a dillema. Something happened?

Yes, my friend just texted me, she's waiting for me on that square. I'm going to go there.

Ok. Take care.

Take care.

Maybe she just used that as an excuse, but looked legit. Doesn't matter really.

SET 4

Was sitting in a corner near the city bike station, reading a book. Was dressed nicely, had cool glasses and seemed approachable, so I tryed.

Positioned myself near the bike, like I'm going to take it, turn my head:

Cool glasses.

She just looked at me like what do you want. Again, she wasnt really that attractive as I thought at first, so I just took the bike and cycled away.



SET 5

Was feeling down by all the rejections, but since I’m stubborn by nature, I wanted to plow through and do another approach.

I was shopping groceries. At the cash register I noticed there is a cute girl, again taller, standing in another line. I decided to wait for her outside:

Excuse me…

Yes…?

You speak English.

I do.

Are you single?

Took a moment to register that…

No, sorry, not interested.

Walked away.




It was overall not a successful day. First of all my energy was shitty, I felt tension in my upper back, slight anxiety in the background of it all and none of the girls (except the first set) I wasn’t that attracted to. The weather was also shitty today, looked like it affected everyones moods, but that’s not in my control haha.



What to do?

Go to bed earlier today, wake up earlier tomorrow,

Meditate,

Do gratitude journal,

Stretching exercises,

Put more energy in to your sets. Like you used to, ACCENT the compliment, use hand gestures, smile more.

Otherwise continue tomorrow with genuine compliment openers, put some effort in them and overall the same what you’ve been doing before.

 

[Don Giovanni]

12.10.

SET 1 - ig close

Street stopped a cute fashionable asian girl with a compliment . Followed with small talk, where she's from, what is she studying, how is she feeling being here compared to Japan, shared my personal feelings about moving to another country, then proposed a coffee or a drink. Gave me her ig.

Chickened out on a girl that I was naturally attracted to, that's what's bugging me more. Was waiting on the other side of the traffic light, we looked at each other couple times. I should've just waited for her on my side of the street.

 

[Don Giovanni]

Writing down field reports is time consuming. I do voice memos on my phone after outing, then write it down later. Suddenly you got 10 memos and no time haha

I will write just one at a time now. Keep it consistent.

15.10. - night game instadate

After a classical music concert I decided to go out. I went to MovieTheatreClub, where I had a good night two weeks ago.

I get there around 22.30. The DJs will start playing at 23.30 and most people come around 1. I order myself an alcohol free beer and chill on the sofa by the empty dance floor. There are maybe 10 people there so far and a girl with a Pete Doherty type hat has caught eye, being out by her self.

I go out where and ask a couple for a cigarette.

I know its kind of lame, but I feel like this is the most natural opener in night game for me and it buys me time talking with people while I smoke that cigarette if their reaction is good.

So I chat with them for a minute, than HBHat comes out. She sits by the table behind me while I'm talking to the couple. Then I sit 1m away from her, not facing her, waiting for the right opportunity to open. She is just sitting there, sipping her wine and smoking, while I'm drinking my beer and playing on my phone.

She opens me then. Asks me about the club. We exchange few words, then I sit by her table ''so its not awkward''.

I'm a bit nervous at this point, my anxiety is in the background, but I keep my calm and it fades away after 30min or so.

She's Latvian on Holiday, doing a trip around EU. She and her friend, who is sleeping now, a Chilean girl, are staying in the hotel near the MovieTheatreClub, so she came here to see if anything is going on. She's older then me, 29, studied international relationships and wanted to work in the UN but then found out it's not really what makes her happy in life.

After a short deep dive on her aspirations I realize she doesn't put that much importance on work. So I drop that.

I then talk about how you can do whatever you want and how I find it funny that people believe in narratives society presents to us. Like getting married at certain age, having a job, waking up at certain hour, being in monogamous relationship.

It goes so far, that my friend, who, lets put it this way, can't keep a dick in his pants, was telling me one time, dude I finnaly found the one. Now I'm going to be loyal. And I was telling him, don't fool yourself bro, tell her what to expect and don't hurt her later. At the same time I got a girlfriend, but I told her that I will have flings here and there if they arise and she was fine with it. Didn't bother her at all it seemed to me.
I told that to my friend and he was like, dude that is sick. Five months later he's cheating on his girlfriend haha. So the point here is, you don't have to follow the rules, you can function perfectly well by your own rules.

She completely agreed then commented that cheating is not cheating if its an open relationship or something in that way.

I told her the funny thing is, I think, the woman has no need to cheat if she's satisfied with her man. One is enough for her. Whereas we, men, we need new conquests.

She completely agreed, said that the same thing was something they were talking with their friends not so long ago. Biology of our species, one feels the need to spread his seed, the other gets pregnant.

Great. Then we chatted about normal topics. She finished her wine, asked me what are my plans. Nothing, I say, but right now I enjoy talking to you. Ok, she replies, I will just go for another glass.

Thank god for the bouncer haha. The event has started and now she has to pay 10eur to get in. I suggest we go find another bar, that's free, since the party here is nowhere near started.

She agrees. Thank you bouncer!

We walk quite far to find another bar. We find this cossy small one, and grab a seat by one table. Since its pretty loud in there (small place, half full and music louder than it needed, although cool music, joy division and stuff) I make that excuse to sit beside her.

She looked tense. I didn't touch her that much before and it's just now that my anxiety is completely gone. There is a 40cm of space between us. I'm touching her upper arm lightly when I make a point, I take her hat at one point, ask her how do I look, she says great and I actually did look so good in it I'm considering buying a similar looking hat. Then I joke, ok wait for me here, I'm just going to the bathroom to shoot up some heroine (Pete Doherty joke). She laughs, then opens a theme about drugs.

We talk about that then return to the theme that you really don't need to follow societies narratives and can build completely your own unique lifestyle. Talk about that, then I deep dive her on her travels.

I take the moment when someone walks past our table to move ''out of politeness'' closer to her.

We talk mostly about her. The bar is starting to close and I'm in a dilemma. She's interesting, but so far cold sexually. I could just say goodbye since I don't see this going anywhere tonight or I could take her to another bar. I choose the latter.

We walk to another cool bar, this one I know. Order drinks, sit by the table. She at first sits on the other side. I choose not to move, let her notice it by herself and move. She did, said that she can't hear me, I just tapped on the chair beside me and she changed sits.

We talk about drunken adventures, share stupid stories. She shows me her burn scar on her hand, which was a result of a drunken night, when she fell beside a bonfire and caught herself on the embers. I carress her hand, we are now close to each other. I notice I get some IOI's from other girls in that bar.

But nothing more than that. I'm satisfied with how this night went, since I didn't have a lot of successes after I stopped drinking. At the end I kiss her on the cheek and she blushes like a girl.

We were supposed to meet the next day, I was supposed to get her lsd, but my family came to visit me for the weekend, so it was inconvinient haha Besides I didn't like the trouble I would have to put myself through and exhausting my weak contacts in this city, since I just moved here.

She traveled out of the country after that day.

Takeaway

The main thing that fucked me up was the anxiety in the beginning. That was why I forgot to touch her early on, that was why she was also tense in the first bar. I should have aroused her more, be more conscious of good eye contact, slower and more sensual voice.

Some good stuff I did here. The opening was natural. I like this concept of doing reverse approach invitations, paimai in a sense. The transition in to a sexual topic in the MovieTheatreClub was also natural and the whole story was delivered good.

At least I remembered to touch her later on and give her the kiss on the cheek, but then it was too late.

 

[Don Giovanni]

17.10. day game

My family was visiting me from Friday evening till Sunday afternoon. We were walking past the parliament building on Saturday, where I noticed this super cute girl, dressed with a sense for fashion and glasses. I didn't approach, since I was with my family of course.

I was on my own on Sunday evening. I wanted to do some approaches, before I meet with HBTantric for the new Bond movie (my first day game real lead from September, I didn't write about her here... she's into healthy living, no drugs, tantric meditations and loves going to the movies).

I decide to go past the parliament, since the image of that girl from yesterday was still in my head. Guess who I see there? Lets call her HBFrech.

She is sitting on the same spot on the stairs by herself, doing nothing, just observing the sunset. The staircase is wide and there's nobody sitting besides her. It would be so obvious doing indirect, I choose direct.

I walk towards her, but slightly left from her. Of course she looks at me. I say hi to her and she replies in a weak voice, like she doesn't know what I want and why am I going towards her.

I sit beside her.

DG: Hey, I wanted to meet you. I saw you here yesterday, but I was with my parents.
HB: I'm my english is bad.
DG: No problem, we'll communicate with our hands haha
HB: Ok haha

Now that I'm closer, I see how beautiful she really is. Under her glasses are light blue eyes and her face looks a bit like Marion Cotillards, only prettier. I'm not exaggerating, I'm in awe.

DG: Where are you from?
HB: France.
DG: Paris?
HB: No, Chamonix Mont Blanc
DG: Aaa Mont Blanc, from a city?
HB: No it's a village.

She shows me where that is on google maps, which is great since I get to move closer to her.

DG: I'm also from a village. How many people?
HB: 40000
DG: Haha and you call that a village?
HB: I don't know haha
DG: I'm from *show her on google maps* but my village has 400 people haha I'm sorry what's your name?
HB: HBFrench
DG: I'm DG

I hold her hand, while I try to get her name right. It's a french name, hard for me to pronounce. The handshake lasts somewhere near 10s, when she getly pulls away.

She was so hot and beautiful I got horny just talking to her. I couldn't believe it.

I was talking about how beautiful this hour of the day is, the red skies, the city lights go on, everyone is free and relaxed... It has a romantic atmosphere to it. That's why I like to take walks at this hour.

She asked me to slow down, since she couldn't understand english so good. Also makes me think I'm talking too fast (it doesn't fell like that until you slow down).

I asked her if she's traveling alone, turns out she is. Ask her how does she like it? She misunderstands and says because she has no friends to travel with, I repeat my question, she replies she loves the freedom. I ask her about her age, she's 18. Holy shit, and traveling alone (and so hot besides all that i didn't say this loud haha)? You're going to be so far ahead of other people when you get older. Again I have to repeat what I meant, I say you will have different perspectives, will see more cultures, ways of life and will be more mature. She agrees, asks me about my age.

I'm supposed to be going to the movies now. Which I regret, I would rather stay here and talk to her. I tell her that, but then suggest we meet tomorrow for a coffee, just a coffee I say (wtf did I say this?). She agrees, wants to give me her ig, I refuse and say messenger, phone number.
She gives me her phone number and off I go, wishing her good night.

HBTantric was in a bad mood. She was with her dying father before coming here, so that's understandable. I try to pace her and cheer her up (we talked about this before and it's nothing more to be said. It's sad and I empathize with her).

After I cheer her up and during the movie I touch her here and there, she touches me and we generally have fun and enjoy the movie.

I noticed my body language leaning towards her more than hers towards me. At the same time I get a needy feeling inside. Something to take notice of. As I lean away from her she leans into me. You could be playing around more with this stuff, creating a '' vacum'' she then fills.

After the movies we waled home. She got into her habit of talking long monologues, which was boring me at that point. I told her she speaks a lot, she got selfconscious about that, but not offended (at least she didn't look like it). Asked me if that bothers me, I told her no, it's just I don't know how to reply to all that she says, after that.

We stopped at her train stop and just stood there saying this is my stop in a stoic manner. I didn't know how to react to that also, so I just hugged her goodbye. That was the worst hug in a while. I wonder what she was thinking, did she want me to kiss her or what? Was she offended?

A thing wort noting here is that she is in an open relatioship and we've hanged out 3 times before, all of these times she didn't really give me a chance to escalate, or I didn't know how to.

I have a feeling this is the last time I saw her. I'm not going to ask her out anymore, unless she asks me out, then yea... All of the time I was thinking of HBFrench. Later I also thought she was right, her talking too much does get on my nerves, I just didn't admit that to myself.

I woke up the next morning still thinking about HBFrench. Fuck me. I checked her ig and it's good I didn't give her mine. She has 3500 followers, mine has less then a 100 haha.

Texting HBFrench 18.10.


11.30

bonjour hbfrench! any sightseeing plans for today? i want to show you my favourite part of town, you will LOVE it - DG

12.45

Hello. today i go to the thermal baths, but where do you live here?

cool. staying at xy street, where are you staying?

im in the old town

i finish with school at 15h, i suggest we meet at xy bar after your baths

where is it

16.00

i send her the address of the bar

19.00

let me know when you're done

im coming out of the termal baths

is xy bar at 20.30 good?

but what will you want to do?

I fuck up here completely.

a lot of talking and drinking ice tea haha

i double text

i'm not going to do anything you don't want me to. i want to see you, but you can do whatever you want (wtf?)

ok I haven't eaten yet

there is a nice italian restaurant near by

yes but I don't have much money left

what do you have in mind? there is also a cheap turkish near there

i'm just telling you i can't go to a restaurant because i have no more money, i only have 4 eu for my bus ticket tomorrow.

ok then eat something and we can catch up later

This goes back and forth for an hour. the next text she waits another whole hour to reply, now I know nothing is going to happen.

I don't know if i'm going out tonight because i'm very tired

no worries. enjoy the rest of your trip

Takeaway

You got needy and blew it. That was it. And you should text her 15min after you met her, maybe exchange some texts that evening, or even set up the date, before you said goodbye to her.

She was the most beautiful girls I've ever approached. Not that I'm afraid of hot or beautiful girls, this beautiful are just rare. 1 in 1000. Which got me thinking, how needy I became after I said goodbye, how fast I put her on a pedestal and besides that THAT IS POSSIBLE FOR ME RIGHT NOW AS I AM to meet a girl of that caliber.

also... SPEAK SLOWLY STRONG EYE CONTACT!!!

 

[Don Giovanni]

Seems more important to write latest reports down. Hope I will get the time for the ones left, but in the mean time...

25.10. night game

It's 21h and I went to the RusticBar, hoping to do some homework on my laptop and meet girls doing so.

No luck. Or no girls, I should say, but I did the homework. On my way back I passed another bar full of people, mostly girls in groups, so that's where I'll be doing my homework next time.

I decided to go to the BigCommercialClub and do some approaching there, to do my daily goals. The fucking bouncer didn't let me in, because the photo of my passport on my phone is not good enough (I've been there at least 4 times and he let me with the same photo). I turned and went to AlterCommercialClub then.

My goal was just approaching 3 girls and making a 15min conversation with them, since I had a rough time last time.

I get in without a problem. Right away there's a girls sitting behind a piano posing and taking pictures, I pass and say ''Love the song you're playing'' (The music is obviously too loud to hear anything, it's a joke) ''Thank you so much ahaha''. I just keep walking, knowing I could meet them later.

I go up the stairs where another two girls are taking photos (are girls doing anything else nowadays?) and they're blocking the way ''sorry we'll be quick'' and I go ''no worries. bdw you're blending in with the wall behind you, your sweater is the same colour'', ''your right'', ''omg i litteraly can't see you'', she laughs ''haha it's just my head right'' , ''yea right'' and then I pass them by, knowing I could talk to them later.

I'm more relaxed then last time, that's for sure. I walk around the venue, check for opportunities. I sit on a bench and take my phone out to write up notes what to do next. There is a group of 5 girls beside me, one is wearing a birthday hat and it's the ugliest birthday hat I've seen haha - so I comment on that, with a playful tone of voice obviously. They laugh hard.

Next I go to the smoking area and light myself a cigarette. The coloured sweater girl and her friend are talking to 2 dudes right next to me. At first I didn't even notice that. I leave them be. There's a group of 2 girls and 2 guys sitting behind different table and just for being social I comment on the girls shoes as she has the same model of converse as me. Of course the guy jumps in soon after that, it was his girlfriend I find out after I ask them where do they know each other from. The other 2 are another couple they met tonight. I then talk to the dude for 15min, just friendly chat to get in the mood.

I excuse myself after that and got back inside. I sit on a bench half shadowing and soon after that a 2 set comes and takes the table next to me. One hot, could tell if she was super hot or just hot and her fat friend. I pretend that I'm going to walk away and pass their table. Then I say,

''spanish?'' - they both had black hair, one was dark skinned

''no. guess''

''ok, but i'm going to need you to talk in your language''

they talk something

''that sounded like english, right? or no, wait... italian''

Wtf worst guessing ever, I could as well said japanese haha They were swedish.

''where are you from?'' they ask me

''guess''

They ask me to talk in my language and also fail. Standard small talk, are they on holiday, ask me what am I dong here, where do they know each other, I joke that they look nothing like sweedish, the fats father is tunisian so that makes sense and the hot ones hair is dyed. I ask why, blonde hair are beautiful, she says not on me (low self esteem? - her nails were also done too much). She also had light blue eyes, gorgeus.

I start talking more and more to the hot one, she was a singer and I'm also a musician, while her friend is looking like she is getting resentful. I notice that and try to involve her in our conversation, but she doesn't show any interest. That went on for 5min, when the fat friend pulled her phone out and started playing looking super bored. I saw that's only going to get worse, so I excused myself to go walk around.

I need a strategy for these scenarios, check out 2 set theory...

I walk around and see a lone wolf smoking a cigarette. I approach her, asking for a lighter. She's older, probably in her 30s, but russian and still has those russian/ ukranian facial features. Ask her if she's waiting for friends, no, she's out alone. Ask about that, she lives near by and went out for a drink before bed, to which she's going to after she drinks up, she wants to go sight seeing tomorrow. More or less boring small talk, with few exceptions; I ask her if the ring on her finger is with a real diamond (obviously not) she laughs and I get to hold her palm. When she talks about Moscow and other cities she keeps using the word boring, so I ask her about her life, thinking she must do something exciting with it, turns out no, so I tease her for being boring. She's gets pretty close to me by this point, we're talking on 15cm distance and it's 15min into the conversation. We talk some more, then she says she really needs to go, so I hug and kiss on the cheek her goodnight. Compliance from this one was excelent.

I smoke another cigarette and decide to leave on a good note. It was just hour and a half, but a good one and I would rather get some sleep for tomorrow.

Takeaway

Club game is harder here for me, because I don't know anyone. Back in my home town I could always talk to someone I know when not in set, here I can't. Which is good, it pushes me to approach more. But there are in between times. Those are best to just shadow or talk to some dudes. That is better then getting rejected publicly, I want to avoid that like plague, or stand like I don't know what I'm doing there.

Solution? I did it good this time. Start talking to people asap, that gets you out of your head. Shoot random funny comments, maybe compliments on outfits, assumptions or cold reads and keep walking. You can reopen later or stay in, if the set is warm like the swedish girls were.

Next time, get some escalation going on.

 

[Don Giovanni]

27.10. and 28.10. night game

On 27th I went to a rock concert at MovieTheatreClub. Shitty band but my kind of people, my kind of girls.
During the break I went out for a cigarette. There was a cute girl smoking a electronic cigarette alone behind one table. I put my glass on her table while I took my cigarettes out. Then I turned around, asked her if there's going to be another band. She immediately told me I could sit down if i want.

So I did. Just casual small talk, she was impressed by me being from another country, studying what I study. Then her male best friend with his girlfriend joined and she introduced us. We chatted then we went in to listen to second band. I would say I half hooked them. I didn't feel like a part of their group yet, they were dancing wildly and I didn't feel like it, so I positioned myself 1m away from them and just listened to the band. Since that is what i like to do on concerts anyway.

After the concert I went to take a piss, go out for a smoke and she's there again by herself. We talk and our conversation gets more about her. The friend and his girlfriend briefly join us and leave us shortly after that. I didn't dare to do any escalation since her friend was right behind me, although I did some light touch.

I asked her for her favorite band from here, the biggest one that everyone is listening to and she told me about this band. We exchanged facebook as I promised her I will send her my music video (she said she is most interested in that, like she really meant it).

I get home, send her my music video and go check this big new rock band she told me about. It's quite good.

I follow the band on instagram today to see if they're playing any gigs in the near future near me. And what do I see? The singer is doing a solo gig just 5min walk from my place today! Cool, so that's where I'm going today.

A new, fancy bar and concert hall, all people there are dressed to impress, more girls than guys. A great place, no doubt.

So I order myself a drink, go for a smoke and take a sit after to listen to the concert. I wasn't feeling particulary social today, so I didn't approach anyone till now.

I started approaching after the concert. Or lets be honest, a girl approached me. 2 set, one HB10 and HB8,5. Both stunners. HB8,5 asked me for a lighter in her broken english ''can i ask you for a fighter'' so I teased her about it. Some small talk then HB8,5 asked me for my name. We hold our hand for good 15-20s as I spell her my name. After that said this is a nice place, told them a story about how I just found this band and same day the singer is doing a solo set next door. Then HB10 tells me that the singer is actually her cousin so I can meet him late if I want. Ha!

I felt some anxiety and was focusing on relaxing myself, speaking slowly and holding good eye contact and stuff. I forgot at one moment what to say to them and refrained myself from filling the space with unnecessary bull shit. They started asking me questions then, normal what do you do, said I look older and normal small talk.

My mouth was dry as hell so I excused myself to get a glass of water. Feeling more social now I saw another 2 set besides the bar and approached ''you must be a dancer or something'' - one girl was dancing with some interesting moves during the concert. She said no and yes, a amateur dancer and her friend was a professional dancer. I then asked a friend if she knows such and such, small talk followed and then we talked about the concert. They got deep with the critique about the concert and I didn't care to talk about that that much. Oh, they were both hot, HB8 and HB7. I thought I could just go back outside, meet the singer and talk to the other 2 set.

Excused myself, went back to the smoking room and the singer was there. I introduced myself, gave the guy a cigarette, then we talked about music. Really chill dude and nice dude. I explained him the story of how I got here and asked him for a selfie, so I can send it to the girl from yesterday haha.

Then naturally the conversation moved between him and his cousin and I ended up with HB8,5. Just normal talk about how I like it here, covid situation and stuff like that. Nothing special. I teased her some more, light touch on high points. The singer later left, we said goodbye and everyone was in the headspace of going home.

Note: you should be consciouss of that and say goodbye before they say it, just seems like a better frame to be in.

I said we could get together sometime and exchange facebooks, they're down for it, then HB8,5 asks me what I'm doing tomorrow. She works in this brunch cafe and invites me to come over during her shift (this is the reason I didn't go to another venue and rather get some sleep today). She doesn't seem in a hurry, but HB10 is saying she really needs to go, her brother is waiting for her, so we say goodbye. The part when we walked out of the smoking area was a bit awkward, because she was in a hurry, HB8,5 obviously went with her and I was in no hurry myself. But I feel like the goodbye was more sincer. I don't know, maybe I'm just overanalysing here.

I feel like HB8,5 took a liking at me. Or maybe that's just the way she is. Lets find out!

I will message her tomorrow about where she works if she doesnt message me.

I sent the selfie with the singer to girl from yesterday, who told me about the band. No reply yet from her about the music video (I get that it's an investment when people ask you listen to my music). We'll see.