Last time you had sex question

[Dirty dagger]

I'm not sure what's the best answer to the question 'when did you have sex the last time'. I have been asked this in three completely different situations and I think my reaction has been right every time.

Last Tuesday there were two guys that I was competing with to get girls on the same table. These were the only girls at the bar and I was basically stealing these guys thunder. Clearly this guy was trying to cockblock me even though he was having a friendly vibe. I chose my answers to ignore their questions the best I could (sprezzatura) and keep myself a mystery. These answers don't come out as very cool but I don't think the girls really care.

Here is the question and my answer. Note that I don't use lies so I have also listed the honest and straight answer I could have used:
Question: Have fucked anyone into ass recently? / My answer: It depends. / Straight answer: Last Friday.
Question: Have you fucked recently? / My answer: Not at this week. / Straight answer: Last Sunday.

Another incident before happened on a Friday. I was just finished rocking a girl hard for third time that night. This was the first time I was meeting with this girl. I gave her a straight answer but I pretty much stopped there to not ruin the mystery. There wasn't much connection between us before we had sex and she was figuring me out. I didn't want to come out as a loser even though I had already nailed her with my sexual skills.

After my answer she noted that she was trying to figure if I hadn't had in a long time. Since I was fucking her so hard and much.
Question: What is the last time you fucked? / My answer: Last Monday.

Third one was on a social circle and most likely not an attack against me. There were some girls present that I would have liked to fuck. It was kind of my own fault for volunteering the club that I was on the last night. Guy asked if I got lucky and I answered him "yes". I'm not sure if there's a good answer to that question. Maybe turning the question back and asking where he was the last night?

Saying directly either "yes" or "no" sounds very bad to me. Yes answer at least gets some giggles out of the girls. I'm not sure if I'm making this unnecessarily big deal. I'd like your opinions.

 

[ray_zorse]

Smile mysteriously, pause and say "I never kiss and tell".
cheers, Ray

 

[Dirty dagger]

Smile mysteriously, pause and say "I never kiss and tell".
cheers, Ray

Easy answer to all the difficult sexual questions! "I'm always discreet" translates to my language better. Actually that's what I told the girl that I had sex with when she started asking more questions.

 

[mountaingoat]

Once a guy challenged me with the low bar of "Have you ever kissed a girl?" trying to imply that Im even worse off than a virgin. I made the mistake of sheepishly saying yes instead of saying "No, never in my life." with a smirk. Joking that you are a virgin (with the right tone) can make a girl giggle and begin to wonder how experienced you are...the mystery evoked.

Ray has a good idea as well, but variety is the spice of life.

 

[Dirty dagger]

Once a guy challenged me with the low bar of "Have you ever kissed a girl?" trying to imply that Im even worse off than a virgin. I made the mistake of sheepishly saying yes instead of saying "No, never in my life." with a smirk. Joking that you are a virgin (with the right tone) can make a girl giggle and begin to wonder how experienced you are...the mystery evoked.

Ray has a good idea as well, but variety is the spice of life.

Both variations are good. The way I see it:
This one better fits the question "Have you ever x" -> "No, never in my life."
Ray's answer better fits questions "What's the last time you x" or "Have you recently x" -> "I'm always discreet."