Let's talk about Auto Rejection

[Lawliet]

Hey bros,

I've been searching around the site but have yet to find a post on pulling girls out of auto rejection.
Chase says it's the toughest situation to be in and there is no straightforward solution (Escalation Windows)

This is exactly why I want a thread that has all the comprehensive "To Knows" about auto rejection.

Please share some techniques or anecdotal YOU HAD with auto rejection:
A girl you managed to recover
A girl who was half in AR before you pulled her out.
ANYTHING AR related!

Try to write out any dialogue exchange you remember! Any detail can be the key to game changer!

Yours,
Lawliet

 

[Bboy100]

See: https://www.girlschase.com/content/ultim ... -girl-back
Part of that article discusses how to get back girls who are in auto-rejection.

Also, one thing I can say that has helped me in the past is phone calls. If you lose a girl for whatever reason (including auto-rejection), don't try to text your way back into the game. You MUST call her. Even that usually doesn't work. But its still 10x more effective.

 

[Lawliet]

Thanks for sharing BBoy100. Nice to get it rolling.
What did you say on the phone?
Let's hear your astonishing achievements in turning it around! It's not easy...so a pat on the shoulder!

And good suggestion! I'll definitely list that article first post

EDIT: Can't edit...?

Let's work together everyone, share experiences (since we all avoid auto rejection, we hopefully not bumping into too many of these).
With all our experiences, we can find patterns, figure out hard rules! Create a comprehensive roadmap!

Then from a "saving a girl" is a hairpulling scenario to something we can handle easily.
Heck, we hone this skill and might even reach a new plateau from our discoveries!

 

[Bboy100]

Let's hear your astonishing achievements in turning it around! It's not easy...so a pat on the shoulder!

Tbh, I've only done this once thus far. It was with a girl who went into auto-rejection because my value was higher than the guys she as used to and my attainability was too low. Additionally, I missed an EW. I sent her an "I had a good time" text, then I asked her out over text the next day. She replied to neither. Normally, I wouldn't advocate waiting a long time to call a girl, but when you lose her, I feel like its an exception. Reason being that atm, she has negative emotions associated with you as opposed to positive ones. So you want to give her at least a little bit of time to cool off. So after that week or so, call her. In my experience, she won't pick up 90% of the time. At this point, I haven't had any experiences turning it around.

However, if she does pick up, there are a couple things I did:
1. Briefly talk about something fun/good about the date. Just to remind her that despite how she might feel now, she did have fun.
2. She'll usually give you some BS excuse for why she can't see you. In the case of my girl, she said she was afraid that I'm a "player" and that I have STDs. <----No matter what her response, you must be warm and non-judgmental.
3. Figure out what that really means. In this case, the "player" part says a lot. It means she believes my value is inaccessible to her. That I don't value her as a human being. In other words...my attainability is too low.
4. Fix said problem if its an attainability issue. So be honest with her. This is the one time you can drop the whole concept of "game" and just tell her straight up that you like her, that this is some sort of "misunderstanding" and so fourth. Basically, explain to her (in a warm tone of voice), why she's wrong.

After I did this, the girl eased up quite a bit. I laid her on the next date.

If if its a value issue, I'm not really sure what you can do. Cause lack of value is usually a problem with your fundamentals/presence. Not something you can instantly fix. And definitely not something you can communicate that you've fixed over the phone. But I guess that if it is a value issue, the best thing you can do is still to just address her objections.

 

[foggy]

If you've been talking with a girl, but plans fell through one or two times and now she is going cold, the easiest way to bring them back is to hammer them with a deep question randomly after you two haven't talked for a few days. It kind of shocks her and brings her out of auto pilot. Then you start deep diving her. I find this sparks just enough interest to make plans with her to hang out.

 

[Ambiance]

The Reversing Past Precedent article as well as the Ultimate Guide to Getting a Girl Back article should be your cornerstones when pulling out of auto-rejection. That said, I've successfully "turned" several girls.

The first attempt I ever made was with a coworker I had hooked up with, but then I got sick and I came across as pretty cold to her. From reading those two articles I knew if I started chasing her I was done, so I slowly dialed up the warmth without really pursuing her. In the meantime I dated several other girls, so I had enough abundance that I never felt compelled to chase her. I also made sure to be as outcome independent as possible, and accepted the fact I may never get this gorl again.

After some time had passed she actually reached out to me, and I responded in a way that escalated to the problem, and when I felt she was ready I told her how I had gotten really sick and that my grandmother had died, which threw me for a loop. I then related to her own situation since her own grandmother is pretty ill. Note that this entire time I kept the focus of the conversation on her, using my own situation to relate to her.

From there it was cake. I told her that we should hang out sometime soon, and casually had her come to my house where we very easily and quickly transitioned to intimacy. Now we are in a FWB relationship, although she really likes me so who knows how long it will last.

Case in point: once a girl is in auto-rejection you should let sleeping dogs lie, while very slowly transitioning to whatever it is you need more of, such as warmth or attention. You also should force yourself to let the girl go; not only is this necessary it also improves your chances. One girl I nearly did pull out of auto-rejection was chasing after me, but I slipped up and started chasing her back, losing her once more.

 

[Lawliet]

If you've been talking with a girl, but plans fell through one or two times and now she is going cold, the easiest way to bring them back is to hammer them with a deep question randomly after you two haven't talked for a few days. It kind of shocks her and brings her out of auto pilot. Then you start deep diving her. I find this sparks just enough interest to make plans with her to hang out.

Oh, sounds like a good idea. A deep question...you got an example, backstory?
Would be great
Lawliet

 

[Lawliet]

2. She'll usually give you some BS excuse for why she can't see you. In the case of my girl, she said she was afraid that I'm a "player" and that I have STDs. <----No matter what her response, you must be warm and non-judgmental.

Warm and nonjudgmental? How did you respond at the time with a player and STD accusation?
I can only think of, "Players and STDs are scary aren't they...I can see why you're concerned." at the moment.
Good stuff bro,
Lawliet

 

[Ree]

Nice topic
The problem i have is the same problem bboy had/haz
Gal autorejects after date 1....im more interested in prevention athan cure
Nearly all gals i fail to sleep with after date 1 disapear