- Joined
- Dec 20, 2018
- Messages
- 497
I’m trying to get into the habit of posting all of my dates now for feedback. As anyone who has read my journal knows, my main problem is overcoming LMR, and although I get many dates I have a very poor lay/date ratio.
This was a lead I got from dancing last Saturday. I went to one of my typical Salsa/Bachata venues where there are lots of good dancers, and lots of women. I was having a good night and meeting many new women, as is typical whenever I go out to these events.
At this event I notice a full-figured, big-breasted woman who appears to be alone making her way around the two dance floors. Estimating late-30’s. We do not run into each other right away as I’m dancing/interacting with other ladies. Eventually I catch up to her in the bachata room.
I ask her to dance and she says yes, but tells me “I do not do sensual stuff”. I don’t remember my exact response to her, but it was something along the lines of “it’s okay I’ll go easy on you” (as in, not taking her seriously). When we dance I still lead some sensual moves and she actually does a decent job following, meaning what she said was BS. The entire time she is laughing, enjoying herself, and the vibe is immediately sexy with strong eye contact.
After this dance we converse a bit. Unfortunately, I don’t remember the exact dialogue, but it ends with my typical “are you a beer girl or a wine girl” and the number request. She actually refuses this request at first, and deflects with “why do you want my number, what are you going to do with it?”. Again, I don’t remember my response, probably some BS like “I’ll only call you 18 times a day” or “I’ll take you to church”.
It wasn’t a hard rejection, just token resistance, which is the theme here with this woman in particular even more than others. I decide to lead her to the salsa room and she complies. We dance again. Again, really fun, she laughs, enjoys herself, makes strong sexy eye contact. More conversation afterwards that I don’t exactly remember, just some background info about herself, then we go back to the bachata room, and this time when I ask for the number again she gives it to me.
We part after that and I don’t see her again the rest of the night.
I send her an icebreaker text the next day and she responds in about 3 hours. Even though she is salvadoreña she prefers English:
At this point the conversation dies, and the date is still 5 days away. I consider sending some kind of pinging text during the week before the date but decide against it – if she is interested she will show up.
Friday rolls around and I text her in the morning a proposed time and place. She responds quickly and confirms. So everything is okay.
The plan is my standard two-venue date + the bounceback to my place, both venues within walking distance of my apartment building. It has become my go-to format for attempted first date seductions.
I’m running late from work (as usual) in the evening, but since the place is a 5 minute walk from my apartment I am only about 10 minutes late. She shows up minutes after me.
Venue one is a wine bar with a chill vibe and live music. She shows up looking great, and better than the night I met her. She had curled her hair, put on make-up and bright red lipstick, had a top on with leopard pattern and a mesh in front of her chest that showed off her breasts (but not in an obvious way), and black jeans. We sit at the corner of the bar where there was room, not side-sitting exactly but perpendicular to each other.
Conversation flows nicely. We talk a lot about dancing and travelling of course, but also her family history and work. I find out:
Tried some verbal escalation routines in the venue, like asking her:
“Why are you single? Do you murder all of your boyfriends/husbands?”
And
“what kind of guys do you like?”
In response to that second question, she says “I like all guys”. I respond “all guys?” eyebrow raise. She quickly qualifies, touches me lightly on the arm – “no, not like THAT, I just don’t discriminate on nationality/race”. Also told me she is a bit reserved and sometimes has trouble opening up to guys at first, hence the problem with doing sensual bachata moves with guys she just met. She also tells me she “used to think” bald men are sexy, and since I am completely clean-shaven and have no hair it’s a sly compliment. I tell her “good to know”
Overall I was happy with how it was going, and on a high point I pay for the drinks (a red wine taster then individual drinks, so we are about 1.5 drinks in) then I initiate the move to the second venue – a hookah lounge bar close to my place (the same one I fact I took the married colombiana to in my last FR).
We sit in exactly the same place side-by-side that I sat with the married colombiana. She has no problem getting a hookah and smoking it, which is nice (most girls I take to these places don’t want to do it). We also order another round of drinks, I get a beer and she gets more wine. The place is playing hiphop and has a mostly afro crowd, but in general I like the vibe.
Here I escalate more the physical touch, (take her hand to look for “secret husbands”), and building of the topic of her catholic upbringing, try to use some of the sex talk routines from Alek, specifically:
- The “8 different types of orgasms” routine
- The “Most women don’t know where their G-spot is” routine
She has no problem talking about sex, and in response to the “8 different types of orgasms” routine, she starts talking about how simple men are sexually – only one (or perhaps two, if you count anal) types of orgasms.
I also seed the bounce back to my place at this point, talking about how my playlist is better. We are at this place for over an hour (total time out at the two venues slightly over 3 hours).
Eventually, after the venue has turned up the music and we are already close to each other due to the loud volume in the place, I tell her we are going to “le chateau Científico” to listen to better music, have more wine, and dance. She agrees.
We walk back to my place making small talk along the way. Once in my apartment, I turn on the lights, put on music, and pour some wine for us while she makes herself comfortable on my couch. I give her her glass, then stand her up and start dancing with her. This is when I kiss her for the first time, and she kisses back.
What follows is a solid 6-7 hours of LMR. It’s a sexy game where we are dancing or on the couch watching music videos, I am escalating physically by kissing her, she would reciprocate for a minute or two then pull away (or physically push me away playfully), then I would fractionate and try again a few minutes later – or not, making it look like I was about to kiss her (while are dancing) but then pulling away at the last second. Then trying again. A few times she initiated the kissing which was nice. But then would pull away again.
One key moment:
Eventually I lift her and carry her to my bed (literally) and the game continues. She lets me get a little further, and I’m feeling up her breasts and almost getting to her vagina (I notice she has shaved her pubic hair). Her body is magnificent and my dick is rock hard. But she puts on the brakes again.
Another key moment:
During one of the points that I am fractionating I turn away from her and close my eyes, finding myself asleep (after my dick calms down). I wake up 2-3 hours later and it’s 4:30 am. She wakes up with me. I try to escalate again but she puts on the breaks again. We go back to sleep.
At 6:30 am, we are both conscious again and she says:
She appears to have made up her mind, so I don’t push further, but keeping my word I put some clothes on and walk outside with her. More small talk on the way back to her car. There are a few people out but it’s mostly quiet and barren at that hour.
Once at her car she drives me back to my place. We kiss again for a nice while (and I playfully tap her cheek) before I get out of the car.
I go back to sleep. Around noon I text her in Spanish. Here is the exchange (translated into English):
That is where it is now. Chance of date #2 is high in my book. I always struggle to think of a good follow up date to a date that was just drinks and had a successful bounce-back and failed escalation, but I’m thinking maybe live music or walking in the city. I may send a scheduler text tomorrow to try to get something on the calendar for next weekend, since I have several other dates with other women planned for the coming week.
Feedback is welcome. This fits into my typical pattern of getting the bounce-back with LMR, but in this case I actually don't see a lot of things wrong with how this went - other than the fact that I didn't get laid. I was genuinely enjoying my time with this sexy woman. She may just need more time before sex.
This was a lead I got from dancing last Saturday. I went to one of my typical Salsa/Bachata venues where there are lots of good dancers, and lots of women. I was having a good night and meeting many new women, as is typical whenever I go out to these events.
At this event I notice a full-figured, big-breasted woman who appears to be alone making her way around the two dance floors. Estimating late-30’s. We do not run into each other right away as I’m dancing/interacting with other ladies. Eventually I catch up to her in the bachata room.
I ask her to dance and she says yes, but tells me “I do not do sensual stuff”. I don’t remember my exact response to her, but it was something along the lines of “it’s okay I’ll go easy on you” (as in, not taking her seriously). When we dance I still lead some sensual moves and she actually does a decent job following, meaning what she said was BS. The entire time she is laughing, enjoying herself, and the vibe is immediately sexy with strong eye contact.
After this dance we converse a bit. Unfortunately, I don’t remember the exact dialogue, but it ends with my typical “are you a beer girl or a wine girl” and the number request. She actually refuses this request at first, and deflects with “why do you want my number, what are you going to do with it?”. Again, I don’t remember my response, probably some BS like “I’ll only call you 18 times a day” or “I’ll take you to church”.
It wasn’t a hard rejection, just token resistance, which is the theme here with this woman in particular even more than others. I decide to lead her to the salsa room and she complies. We dance again. Again, really fun, she laughs, enjoys herself, makes strong sexy eye contact. More conversation afterwards that I don’t exactly remember, just some background info about herself, then we go back to the bachata room, and this time when I ask for the number again she gives it to me.
We part after that and I don’t see her again the rest of the night.
I send her an icebreaker text the next day and she responds in about 3 hours. Even though she is salvadoreña she prefers English:
Científico: Hola, nice dancing last night
Sexy Salvadoreña (SS): Hola, happy Sunday! Thanks for the dance and adjusting to the non body roll disclaimer. -SS
Científico: I did try, but are certainly able to do body rolls. I saw the evidence
SS: laugh/cry emoji. Well, you gently eased me into it. Didn’t see it coming. Good job!
Científico: Gracias, I can have that effect
Científico: Let me know what your schedule is like this week for that vinito we discussed.
SS: Where do you work? (getting info about logistics)
Científico: answers question, you?
SS: *Gives information about where she lives works*
SS: This week Thu and Fri look good wine emoji
Científico: Let’s shoot for Friday. ok-sign emoji
SS: Cool
At this point the conversation dies, and the date is still 5 days away. I consider sending some kind of pinging text during the week before the date but decide against it – if she is interested she will show up.
Friday rolls around and I text her in the morning a proposed time and place. She responds quickly and confirms. So everything is okay.
The plan is my standard two-venue date + the bounceback to my place, both venues within walking distance of my apartment building. It has become my go-to format for attempted first date seductions.
I’m running late from work (as usual) in the evening, but since the place is a 5 minute walk from my apartment I am only about 10 minutes late. She shows up minutes after me.
Venue one is a wine bar with a chill vibe and live music. She shows up looking great, and better than the night I met her. She had curled her hair, put on make-up and bright red lipstick, had a top on with leopard pattern and a mesh in front of her chest that showed off her breasts (but not in an obvious way), and black jeans. We sit at the corner of the bar where there was room, not side-sitting exactly but perpendicular to each other.
Conversation flows nicely. We talk a lot about dancing and travelling of course, but also her family history and work. I find out:
- She has previously been married, it lasted 8 years. Hinted that she broke off the relationship
- No kids
- Only child, non-existent relationship with her father (who she thinks is
“somewhere in San Francisco”) and regularly speaks to mother in El Salvador
Tried some verbal escalation routines in the venue, like asking her:
“Why are you single? Do you murder all of your boyfriends/husbands?”
And
“what kind of guys do you like?”
In response to that second question, she says “I like all guys”. I respond “all guys?” eyebrow raise. She quickly qualifies, touches me lightly on the arm – “no, not like THAT, I just don’t discriminate on nationality/race”. Also told me she is a bit reserved and sometimes has trouble opening up to guys at first, hence the problem with doing sensual bachata moves with guys she just met. She also tells me she “used to think” bald men are sexy, and since I am completely clean-shaven and have no hair it’s a sly compliment. I tell her “good to know”
Overall I was happy with how it was going, and on a high point I pay for the drinks (a red wine taster then individual drinks, so we are about 1.5 drinks in) then I initiate the move to the second venue – a hookah lounge bar close to my place (the same one I fact I took the married colombiana to in my last FR).
We sit in exactly the same place side-by-side that I sat with the married colombiana. She has no problem getting a hookah and smoking it, which is nice (most girls I take to these places don’t want to do it). We also order another round of drinks, I get a beer and she gets more wine. The place is playing hiphop and has a mostly afro crowd, but in general I like the vibe.
Here I escalate more the physical touch, (take her hand to look for “secret husbands”), and building of the topic of her catholic upbringing, try to use some of the sex talk routines from Alek, specifically:
- The “8 different types of orgasms” routine
- The “Most women don’t know where their G-spot is” routine
She has no problem talking about sex, and in response to the “8 different types of orgasms” routine, she starts talking about how simple men are sexually – only one (or perhaps two, if you count anal) types of orgasms.
I also seed the bounce back to my place at this point, talking about how my playlist is better. We are at this place for over an hour (total time out at the two venues slightly over 3 hours).
Eventually, after the venue has turned up the music and we are already close to each other due to the loud volume in the place, I tell her we are going to “le chateau Científico” to listen to better music, have more wine, and dance. She agrees.
We walk back to my place making small talk along the way. Once in my apartment, I turn on the lights, put on music, and pour some wine for us while she makes herself comfortable on my couch. I give her her glass, then stand her up and start dancing with her. This is when I kiss her for the first time, and she kisses back.
What follows is a solid 6-7 hours of LMR. It’s a sexy game where we are dancing or on the couch watching music videos, I am escalating physically by kissing her, she would reciprocate for a minute or two then pull away (or physically push me away playfully), then I would fractionate and try again a few minutes later – or not, making it look like I was about to kiss her (while are dancing) but then pulling away at the last second. Then trying again. A few times she initiated the kissing which was nice. But then would pull away again.
One key moment:
Eventually I lift her and carry her to my bed (literally) and the game continues. She lets me get a little further, and I’m feeling up her breasts and almost getting to her vagina (I notice she has shaved her pubic hair). Her body is magnificent and my dick is rock hard. But she puts on the brakes again.
Another key moment:
During one of the points that I am fractionating I turn away from her and close my eyes, finding myself asleep (after my dick calms down). I wake up 2-3 hours later and it’s 4:30 am. She wakes up with me. I try to escalate again but she puts on the breaks again. We go back to sleep.
At 6:30 am, we are both conscious again and she says:
She appears to have made up her mind, so I don’t push further, but keeping my word I put some clothes on and walk outside with her. More small talk on the way back to her car. There are a few people out but it’s mostly quiet and barren at that hour.
Once at her car she drives me back to my place. We kiss again for a nice while (and I playfully tap her cheek) before I get out of the car.
I go back to sleep. Around noon I text her in Spanish. Here is the exchange (translated into English):
That is where it is now. Chance of date #2 is high in my book. I always struggle to think of a good follow up date to a date that was just drinks and had a successful bounce-back and failed escalation, but I’m thinking maybe live music or walking in the city. I may send a scheduler text tomorrow to try to get something on the calendar for next weekend, since I have several other dates with other women planned for the coming week.
Feedback is welcome. This fits into my typical pattern of getting the bounce-back with LMR, but in this case I actually don't see a lot of things wrong with how this went - other than the fact that I didn't get laid. I was genuinely enjoying my time with this sexy woman. She may just need more time before sex.
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