Meetup.com Does Not Approve of Pick-Up

[Howell]

Started a group for PUAs to network together on meetup.com, but it was not approved because it didn't meet their community guidelines. They didn't specify, but there is one thing in their guidelines that looks bitterly written for this sort of group:

"Meetup is not for glorifying or promoting unsolicited, predatory, manipulative, or non-consensual activities that serve to intimidate or violate personal boundaries.

Meetup is not for groups that promote, encourage, or actively facilitate harmful, threatening, or violent behavior towards others or oneself. "

This is a pretty recent change. All the PUA groups in my area have been discontinued within the last year, and now on there there's only girls who give guys dating advice in the vein of "just be yourself". Lol, WTF is going on? Kind of a shame that pick-up is associated with such a negative attitude in the the minds of the people who run meetup.com. My guess is that it's a reactionary "one bad egg" sort of scenario. Either that, or just blind prejudice. Probably a bit of both.

 

[Franco]

Howell,

Those statements might have been hinting somewhat at pick-up, but it sounds more to me like they're just covering their bases with general "don't stalk, abuse, harass, or mistreat women."

With all of the recent "hate" toward PUA material right now (given things like the Elliot Rodgers Santa Barbara shooting and a few PUAs being banned from certain areas), it's easy to construe this as a direct attack on them. It's probably more indirect, but I wouldn't be surprised if it includes cold approachers as well.

I pretty much just ignore all of that garbage. If you know how to approach women in a warm, sexy way, then you really have nothing to worry about. Worst case scenario these for me these days is that a girl smiles and is not interested, and then she just walks away. If women are running the website though, then there's not much you can do about it. They either have a "one bad egg" experience, like you mentioned, or they've heard a few stories of a couple of guys and are trying to defend against it. At that point, you choose to just roll with the punches or seek your business elsewhere.

- Franco

 

[Chase]

Howell-

Was because of the Meetup group responsible for this, and all its related bad press:

Toronto Eaton Centre says it’s cracking down on pick-up artists

Here's a cached version of the tone-deaf Meetup post that triggered it:

$5 EATON CENTER APPROACH MARATHON

Set your doubts aside for a session filled with fast paced adrenaline pumping approach action!

For those familiar with the term, we will be "beasting" (aka entering BEAST MODE). Defined along the lines of approaching continuously and consistently - targeting every approachable set in the vicinity.

Some testimony from fellow PUAs who have attended my events either through my website or through meetup:

"Junaid has given me the confidence to approach without stressing about how it will turn out. At the beginning I would be in my head a lot. After training with him I found myself closing numbers every time I went to the mall. I always make a point of going to his events and encourage others to try him out" - Alex G from Mississauga

"Had issues with escalation and could never get a girl to come out with me on a date. Junaid walked me through the steps he uses to get the lay and guided me on how to use them in my approach. I can happily say I have taken 3 girls out on dates in the past month and even managed to pull one back to my place. Thank you Junaid. I know the best is still to come" - Pablo L from Toronto

"Easy to understand. Simple to follow. The guy is experienced, modest and down to earth. Two thumbs up - carry on doing what you do" - Chris T from Scarborough

Event starts at 5PM sharp. $5 gets you in on the action. Queen St Entrance to Eaton Center between Town Shoes & Oakley (inside the mall)

Game on

Side note: Toronto seems like a pretty tragic place to exist as a man.

Kickstarter is another big site that's banned anything related to dating advice after the Internet exploded when a pickup book was successfully funded there. Fortunately, if you want to do a Kickstarter-ish campaign, there are other sites like Indie Go Go, Go Fund Me, etc., and successful models for totally independent campaigns like Lockitron.

If you're looking for guys in your area into pickup, maybe check out one of the local lairs:

• Dallas PUA Lair List
• PUA Lingo Lair List

Chase

 

[Thedoctor]

Side note: Toronto seems like a pretty tragic place to exist as a man.

Almost spit out my drink when I read this.

This is purely conjecture on my part, but I would imagine most "PUA"s you'd find on meetup would be kinda inexperienced and socially awkward. I'm curious if anyone has had any success doing that before?

-John

 

[Smith]

Whenever I read things like this, all these mainstream skewed perception on pick-up makes me a little hesitant to chat up girls. I always wonder how come there are no girls coming out to defend pick-up and tell everyone that's how they meet their dream guy, i.e husband, boyfriend.....

I remembered when I was in Sydney, there was a fb page for daygame and they meet every saturday at the CBD to game. I wanted to join but I had work. But then I realized that whenever I tried to chat up women at the CBD, I get more "blown outs" than usual...can't help but think those guys ruined it for me. Although I had only bump into two dudes who was doing daygame while I was there for 3 months.

 

[Thedoctor]

Smith,

Whenever I read things like this, all these mainstream skewed perception on pick-up makes me a little hesitant to chat up girls. I always wonder how come there are no girls coming out to defend pick-up and tell everyone that's how they meet their dream guy, i.e husband, boyfriend.....

The reason is that when guys are mass approaching and are not overly smooth, girls know what these guys are doing. It does not come off as "natural." Especially with some guys that really don't care if they are being creepy, and weirding out everyone in the vicinity.

Compare that to your example about a girl meeting her dream guy this way. Chances are he wasn't doing anything overly special when he met her. Maybe he had already chatted a couple girls earlier on, but she was the first one to really seem interested. But, her version of the story would be that it was "chance encounter" and they locked eyes so he came over to chat with her. That's the difference that experience makes. It comes off more naturally and the girl has no idea that she has been "picked up."

-John

 

[Howell]

Hmm, looks like it is indeed a "one bad egg" sort of scenario. The takeaway here is that if you're going to be strategic in how you seduce women, don't let anyone know that's what you're doing.

Re: John:

This is purely conjecture on my part, but I would imagine most "PUA"s you'd find on meetup would be kinda inexperienced and socially awkward. I'm curious if anyone has had any success doing that before?

-John

Every dude I've met who's been into pick-up through meetups or anything like that have been how you describe. Pick-up doesn't seem to be very conducive grounds for a mutually respectful relationship, except in special circumstances where there is a clear mentor-student dynamic -- because most guys doing pick-up I've met have been Ryan Gosling impersonators, with all the crudeness and bossiness but none of the redeeming charm or good looks. When you meet a dude and he's preoccupied with out-alphaing you, it gets old fast. I set this meetup up solely in the hopes of building some mentor student relationships.

Howell