- Joined
- Feb 20, 2014
- Messages
- 31
As you can probably tell, I'm pretty new to this forum and, safe to say, relatively new to "The art of seduction." To be honest, its a surprise I've been as successful as I have been, all of which are most likely right place, right time situation's.
A bit of background..
I'm 25 years old, I lost my virginity when I was 16 and since then have slept with somewhere around 40 women (I've lost count, stopped counting in 2007) and have spent 3 years of that time in a long term, monogamous relationship and 18 months of that time I remained abstinent (was living with my grandmother, hardly the right time to be playing the field!)
My long term relationship broke off in july last year and since then I have slept with 3 women, 1 one night stand, another I was seeing for 3 months and the last (and most recent) I was seeing for 4 months (and yeah, there was a little overlap there
) Now safe to say I was rebounding pretty hard after the break up of my long term relationship and when I met the last girl (an old friend from school that I always wanted to bed but didn't) things started off great, very casual, intimate from the outset (first night) and we spent the next 4 months having the best sex I've experienced yet, constantly, like at least 4 hours a night 5 nights a week!
Now, obviously, I messed it up, meeting a girl with whom you share the best intimate relationship you've experienced yet and seeing her frequently, choosing to drop the other and focus on her is a recipe for disaster, I fell head over heels for her and went all cump-beta on her, went super needy, showering her with gifts, dinners, I even brought her pearls for christmas (I know, I know, you don't have to tell me!!) she broke it off with me and a week later the opportunity to move to London presented its self, which I took without hesitation, when I bumped into her in the local bar on my last night in town, she was very cold towards me, but I approached her anyway saying "I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye!" long story short, we spent the night together one last time and I moved the following day.
Since I've been in London, (6 weeks) I've only approached one girl, whom, if you read my other post, you'll see we had a pretty good weekend together, however I didn't see the escalation windows and didn't even kiss her, after she invited herself back to mine (again, I know! DUMBASS!!) and the other I met through POF and within 3 hours of our first meet, had managed to get back to mine, things started getting heated and she throws out "I've never had a proper boyfriend before!" and the Beta within me took over and I backed off, so neither of which I managed to close with!
Now this is the longest I've gone without sex since early 2010, and I keep dropping the ball, I'm getting a little frustrated, annoyed and disheartened and I feel like I've lost momentum, gradually I'm loosing my excited, can achieve anything attitude and I'm slowly slipping into a pessimistic state of mind.
Have any of you experienced a similar thing? do you have any advice that might help me shift into a more positive mindset and regain that momentum? I mean I know I'm doing something right when the one girl I've approached since moving to London and the one girl I met on POF both came back to mine, so I'm not falling at the first hurdle, but the failure to close (and the ever increasing horniness and sexual frustration) are wearing me down!
Now I know I should be approaching more, the whole numbers thing... and actively getting out there more and meeting more women, but if I'm not in the right mindset when I leave the house, I'll only hold myself back anyway or the lack of attitude and confidence will come across, hindering me from the outset!
Any suggestions on how I can effectively bitch-slap myself and get into a more positive state of mind? What do you guys do if/when you hit a rut?
A bit of background..
I'm 25 years old, I lost my virginity when I was 16 and since then have slept with somewhere around 40 women (I've lost count, stopped counting in 2007) and have spent 3 years of that time in a long term, monogamous relationship and 18 months of that time I remained abstinent (was living with my grandmother, hardly the right time to be playing the field!)
My long term relationship broke off in july last year and since then I have slept with 3 women, 1 one night stand, another I was seeing for 3 months and the last (and most recent) I was seeing for 4 months (and yeah, there was a little overlap there
) Now safe to say I was rebounding pretty hard after the break up of my long term relationship and when I met the last girl (an old friend from school that I always wanted to bed but didn't) things started off great, very casual, intimate from the outset (first night) and we spent the next 4 months having the best sex I've experienced yet, constantly, like at least 4 hours a night 5 nights a week!Now, obviously, I messed it up, meeting a girl with whom you share the best intimate relationship you've experienced yet and seeing her frequently, choosing to drop the other and focus on her is a recipe for disaster, I fell head over heels for her and went all cump-beta on her, went super needy, showering her with gifts, dinners, I even brought her pearls for christmas (I know, I know, you don't have to tell me!!) she broke it off with me and a week later the opportunity to move to London presented its self, which I took without hesitation, when I bumped into her in the local bar on my last night in town, she was very cold towards me, but I approached her anyway saying "I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye!" long story short, we spent the night together one last time and I moved the following day.
Since I've been in London, (6 weeks) I've only approached one girl, whom, if you read my other post, you'll see we had a pretty good weekend together, however I didn't see the escalation windows and didn't even kiss her, after she invited herself back to mine (again, I know! DUMBASS!!) and the other I met through POF and within 3 hours of our first meet, had managed to get back to mine, things started getting heated and she throws out "I've never had a proper boyfriend before!" and the Beta within me took over and I backed off, so neither of which I managed to close with!
Now this is the longest I've gone without sex since early 2010, and I keep dropping the ball, I'm getting a little frustrated, annoyed and disheartened and I feel like I've lost momentum, gradually I'm loosing my excited, can achieve anything attitude and I'm slowly slipping into a pessimistic state of mind.
Have any of you experienced a similar thing? do you have any advice that might help me shift into a more positive mindset and regain that momentum? I mean I know I'm doing something right when the one girl I've approached since moving to London and the one girl I met on POF both came back to mine, so I'm not falling at the first hurdle, but the failure to close (and the ever increasing horniness and sexual frustration) are wearing me down!
Now I know I should be approaching more, the whole numbers thing... and actively getting out there more and meeting more women, but if I'm not in the right mindset when I leave the house, I'll only hold myself back anyway or the lack of attitude and confidence will come across, hindering me from the outset!
Any suggestions on how I can effectively bitch-slap myself and get into a more positive state of mind? What do you guys do if/when you hit a rut?
