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Mixed messages...need help

Confused redneck

Rookie
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Joined
Jul 9, 2015
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2
Things she does point the right way, things she says seems geared towards a great relationship. Bit then the next day she wont get back to me. Shes spent the night and we've cuddled, shes helped me with decorating my place after my divorce. Shes hot as hell, and "the girl next door" . I've been a gentleman not making any moves, and recently we had a drink and she drove me across the parking lot to my car and proceeded to kiss me.. She might have been going for my cheek but our lips met. Then the next day i dont hear from her after my good morning text. Hard to decipher...can someone please help?

(there's alot more of the story if you need more input)
 

Confused redneck

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Joined
Jul 9, 2015
Messages
2
Thank you for the response. I really have no problems with dating, finding dates, meeting women ect. I've known this one in particular for quite some time. I'm not out for a one night wham bam. We do connect on an emotional, intellectual and psychological level. We have both been through a tough break which may be why shes a tough nut to crack right now. We get along great. We have expressed interest in eachother directly and indirectly with little things like cards and flirts.

This is the girl i need in my life. Im not just looking to hook up with her. I'm trying to connect, and i think she is too. I just know it. I need help with different angles. There is so much more I can say to justify my actions to wanting to land her in my arms forever with. Shes waiting for something. I just need to figure out what. This is different...Im a better man today because of her.
This one i would wait for.....
 

mindful

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 16, 2014
Messages
256
You need to make a move before she finds a guy who does. Take her as your lover first. This is what the site preaches. All the other stuff will come after that... If it is what you want... Which is what is seems you do. Invite her over for dinner and get her into your bed.
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

Drck

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Feb 14, 2013
Messages
1,488
Hi Redneck,

Radeng has good points, e.g. get familiar with the site philosophy, mainly stop living scarcity with this girl. There are also different ways to look at the same thing. I'll go through your text and try to point important things to focus on:


"Bit then the next day she wont get back to me"
>>>> There might be a couple of reasons for that. She may need more time, or - worse case scenario - she may be flaking. At this time I wouldn't consider it that important.

"Shes spent the night and we've cuddled"
>>>> That is really good, she is interested in you. However, if you want to get this girl and keep her, you have to move forward. Cuddling will not do it.

"I've been a gentleman not making any moves"
>>>> The same. Forget the whole gentleman issues. Not moving on forward is a HUGE mistake. If you don't move on she will shift you into a friend zone, you may easily become a platonic lover, you will be orbiting her and hoping that you'll eventually get her - while she will be seeking another guy...

and recently we had a drink and she drove me across the parking lot to my car and proceeded to kiss me...
>>>> She was investing into you, that is good.

She might have been going for my cheek but our lips met. Then the next day i dont hear from her after my good morning text. Hard to decipher...can someone please help
>>>> Yes. You have to move forward, get more physical. One kiss won't do it. If you don't do anything she will be gone sooner than you think.

"We do connect on an emotional, intellectual and psychological level"
>>>> Mainly, you have to connect on physical level. You don't want to be in platonic love, patiently waiting - while she is sleeping with someone else.


We have both been through a tough break which may be why shes a tough nut to crack right now. We get along great. We have expressed interest in eachother directly and indirectly with little things like cards and flirts.
>>>> You are shifting yourself into a friend zone. She doesn't really care about flirting, cards, jokes, good feelings, nice conversations and so on. She is looking for a man who she can have physical intimacy with.

This is the girl i need in my life.
>>>> That is a wrong attitude, you are setting yourself for a failure. The more you NEED any woman the less you will be respected as a man, and the less desire she will have to be with you. Avoid that NEEDiness. You may want woman, but you don't need her...

Im not just looking to hook up with her. I'm trying to connect, and i think she is too.
>>>> Well, she is already connected. She is investing. She is giving you good vibes. She cuddles and kissed you. However, that is not enough, you need to move forward otherwise she will be gone.

There is so much more I can say to justify my actions to wanting to land her in my arms forever with
>>>> This attitude itself will set you for failure. Again, the more you NEED her the sooner she will be gone...

Shes waiting for something. I just need to figure out what.
>>>> Here is a hint: you need to take her to the bed asap, otherwise she is gone, forever gone...
 
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