Most People just not willing to stop and understand people

[trashKENNUT]

My post title explains it all.

I find that most people are just not willing to stop and say why people behave that way towards us. I think it is a selfish gene thing or whatever. But it is annoying when you get "k" text messages because you were busy.

I guess people are not bothered to be cool? This is not to say be a doormat but it is very transparent and annoying.

Zac

 

[pks391]

Yeah, but the thing is that the only person who would bother to think about this is someone who has a deep understanding of people. However. I rarely/almost never found such people in my life. Such people tend to be empaths and overthinkers.

 

[Rage]

Perhaps many people don't try to see things from other views... but i find it to my advantage, if I try to do so myself whenever necessary.

If someone texts back only k, or doesnt text back at all I can think "wow what a dick" or "wow they think they're too good for me" OR I can tell myself a better positive story which has likelihood to potentially be true as well: perhaps they were busy, or in a rush, or did not see your text saw it really late and felt it not appropriate to text back all that time later.

I choose to tell myself positive stories and perspectives like this, and condition myself to do that in circumstances and events across the board. Perhaps that driver that cut me off just happens to change lanes like that/meant no offense/or never realizes that other people find it offensive or rude.

Can never do this paradigm shift perfectly but can kind of get better and better at this over time. Kind of like Chase discussed in his beating depression article.

Gem

 

[trashKENNUT]

pks391,

Yeah, but the thing is that the only person who would bother to think about this is someone who has a deep understanding of people. However. I rarely/almost never found such people in my life. Such people tend to be empaths and overthinkers.

I learn that this is true. Overthinkers that is. I used to have a friend whom always play the 'saviour' with friends. I never really understand this. I also noted from Chase that everyone is selfish.

So i was thinking, just maybe. Just maybe that i am not 100% emphathetical, if that's a word for it. Because if you look at it again, i am actually asking for investment from this acquaintance of mine to understand that i am busy.

But the key here is i already took time to explain to him but he need me more than i need him and he never invest or give anything that makes me feel i can contribute. Thus imbalance.

Conclusion: Life is management.

If you meet a friend who is clearly high value than you, you prefer to not piss him off. While at the same time, go out there and make yourself number 1, whether that is establishing yourself or go other places. If you meet a girl and her attraction fades, it is better to use date compression than to piss her off.

Zac

 

[trashKENNUT]

Gem,

Perhaps many people don't try to see things from other views... but i find it to my advantage, if I try to do so myself whenever necessary.

If someone texts back only k, or doesnt text back at all I can think "wow what a dick" or "wow they think they're too good for me" OR I can tell myself a better positive story which has likelihood to potentially be true as well: perhaps they were busy, or in a rush, or did not see your text saw it really late and felt it not appropriate to text back all that time later.

I choose to tell myself positive stories and perspectives like this, and condition myself to do that in circumstances and events across the board. Perhaps that driver that cut me off just happens to change lanes like that/meant no offense/or never realizes that other people find it offensive or rude.

Can never do this paradigm shift perfectly but can kind of get better and better at this over time. Kind of like Chase discussed in his beating depression article.

Unfortunately, there's two versions of this. And I noted Chase is in your category.

1)Positive paradigm people - Gem, Chase
2)Neutrality paradigm people - Zac, DrexelScott
p.s: This is no intention of ranking here between anyone or placement, even the negative minded people. Just explain in terms.

and then there's negative minded people, which is actually just 'Keep repeating and operating from the past mental process paradigm people'.

So what makes Gem, Chase.... different from Zac and DrexelScott. The reason i put DrexelScott here is i learn that Drexel had some not so good things growing up and i had such things happen. In Chase's article on lack of abundance, he noted that people who survive the Great Depression still operate in scarcity because of what they experience.

So I can derive that you and Chase did had girls chasing you while growing up or something positive that your genetics or emotions actually value. Me and Drexel did not exactly had things that value genetically or emotionally when we are young.

Complex, it is.

Zac

 

[pks391]

pks391,

Yeah, but the thing is that the only person who would bother to think about this is someone who has a deep understanding of people. However. I rarely/almost never found such people in my life. Such people tend to be empaths and overthinkers.

I learn that this is true. Overthinkers that is. I used to have a friend whom always play the 'saviour' with friends. I never really understand this. I also noted from Chase that everyone is selfish.

So i was thinking, just maybe. Just maybe that i am not 100% emphathetical, if that's a word for it. Because if you look at it again, i am actually asking for investment from this acquaintance of mine to understand that i am busy.

But the key here is i already took time to explain to him but he need me more than i need him and he never invest or give anything that makes me feel i can contribute. Thus imbalance.
True, But the thing is the savior types are self-damaging. Some of them tend to go to sacrifice their own happiness to help others.
Conclusion: Life is management.

If you meet a friend who is clearly high value than you, you prefer to not piss him off. While at the same time, go out there and make yourself number 1, whether that is establishing yourself or go other places. If you meet a girl and her attraction fades, it is better to use date compression than to piss her off.

Zac

 

[trashKENNUT]

Why you post the same thing?

 

[pks391]

pks391,

Yeah, but the thing is that the only person who would bother to think about this is someone who has a deep understanding of people. However. I rarely/almost never found such people in my life. Such people tend to be empaths and overthinkers.

I learn that this is true. Overthinkers that is. I used to have a friend whom always play the 'saviour' with friends. I never really understand this. I also noted from Chase that everyone is selfish.

So i was thinking, just maybe. Just maybe that i am not 100% emphathetical, if that's a word for it. Because if you look at it again, i am actually asking for investment from this acquaintance of mine to understand that i am busy.

But the key here is i already took time to explain to him but he need me more than i need him and he never invest or give anything that makes me feel i can contribute. Thus imbalance.
True, But the thing is the savior types are self-damaging. Some of them tend to go to sacrifice their own happiness to help others.
Conclusion: Life is management.

If you meet a friend who is clearly high value than you, you prefer to not piss him off. While at the same time, go out there and make yourself number 1, whether that is establishing yourself or go other places. If you meet a girl and her attraction fades, it is better to use date compression than to piss her off.

Zac

Sorry I had typed something but it didn't go through. What I was trying to say is this stuff goes too deep after a awhile. My head starts to hurt after that.

 

[trashKENNUT]

pks391,

Apologies. Not something you hear everyday. Again, sincerely.

Zac

 

[Richard]

I think that this phenomenon is a lot more focused in Western society than in the world at large, but even traditionally collective societies might be experiencing a change due to technology. Facebook, text messaging, instant everything takes away the need for many people to actually communicate with somebody in a real way.

Luckily, however, there are a few of us who still exist who try to connect with people at their heart. Everybody has a purpose that they are to work towards but many many variables and obstacles come into play like the ego taking charge trying to logically and rationally explain matters of our hearts. I think that people have lost touch with what it is that makes us, as humans, unique and vastly different than other animals.

My goal and my purpose, though, is to help people remember that connection and the easiest way to do so is to stop and understand the people around me and then work from there. Connecting with people is a dying art - or rather, an art that is being sold as obsolete.

-Richard

 

[trashKENNUT]

Richard,

but even traditionally collective societies might be experiencing a change due to technology. Facebook, text messaging, instant everything takes away the need for many people to actually communicate with somebody in a real way.

Definitely. Very true. It becomes a real problem.

Zac