Expectations Most shit women throw into your life is not ill intended

[POB]

Just a quick reminder, and something I myself forget sometimes: women are a mess by nature!
- their personal lives are never in order, and even when they are, they will find a random reason to mess it up again;
- they take professional shit to heart and tend to react emotionally, sometimes losing golden opportunities in the process;
- most of them are dogshit with money, savings, house, car etc;
- they hate taking risks and putting shit on the line when it involves biz, carrer and money;
- at the same time, they will spend abhorrent amounts of cash on useless shit like creams, procedures and clothes;
- bottom line, they can (and will) thrive living in absolute chaos;

Now, everytime you commit to one of them (not talking about casual stuff, but MLTR and above) you are inviting that chaos into your life.
And if you not realize it and take care of your own shit, you will allow them to mess up your life too.

I'm talking from the heart here, as someone who in the past has lost shitloads of money, nights of sleep and a good chunk of hair when dealing with that chaos....be carefull!

First order of the day is to get your shit together and make sure everything you've built with sweat and tears is well protected.
Only then you should invite that chaos to bash against your tall impenetrable wall.

Sorry if this post looks a little generic, but I've seen a ton of dudes having unecessary problems in their relationships just because they "went with the flow."

 

[POB]

Just a quick reminder, and something I myself forget sometimes: women are a mess by nature!
- their personal lives are never in order, and even when they are, they will find a random reason to mess it up again;
- they take professional shit to heart and tend to react emotionally, sometimes losing golden opportunities in the process;
- most of them are dogshit with money, savings, house, car etc;
- they hate taking risks and putting shit on the line when it involves biz, carrer and money;
- at the same time, they will spend abhorrent amounts of cash on useless shit like creams, procedures and clothes;
- bottom line, they can (and will) thrive living in absolute chaos;

P.S. forgot to add, but this shit is valid for ALL women you have relationships with, including:
- moms
- sisters
- friends
- co-workers
etc.

 

[Skills]

That is not most women that is just a segment of women... The woman that struggle with finances are some women that have a bunch of kids at times... Women that just got divorced or broke up after years of 2 incomes.... And third world low middle class or poor... And a lot of online girls in the damage good segment...

Those girls should not make it to main anyway...

In usa women are doing pretty good a majority better than dudes financially...

Are 1 out of 10 fuck bodies fall in there max 2... Main maybe 1 out of 20...

For example my main has no debt, has different investments, make a lot of money... Doesn't match anything in the op...

 

[Chase]

Agree with the main thrust of the post, @POB.

Unless you are choosing a supremely placid girl, all women come with some degree of drama / problems / etc.

This is worsened by the "when women are venting about problems to you, it is not actually because they want your help solving them" phenomenon:

Which is part of why it feels like they are "living in chaos" -- often they will have some problem but not do anything about it and refuse to let you do anything about it either!

---

That is not most women that is just a segment of women... The woman that struggle with finances are some women that have a bunch of kids at times... Women that just got divorced or broke up after years of 2 incomes.... And third world low middle class or poor... And a lot of online girls in the damage good segment...

Those girls should not make it to main anyway...

In usa women are doing pretty good a majority better than dudes financially...

Are 1 out of 10 fuck bodies fall in there max 2... Main maybe 1 out of 20...

For example my main has no debt, has different investments, make a lot of money... Doesn't match anything in the op...

Yeah, the "bad with money" type is a certain type of girl (well, several certain types).

I cannot say I have ever had a girlfriend who was bad with money. Some of my chicks have been real skinflints

One used to get annoyed at me whenever I bought groceries at the market because she could find them cheaper online.

The spending thing is more down to what types of girls you are into / what you are screening for in your women.

Nevertheless, there are definitely plenty of people out there who are awful with their money... both male and female...

And women are almost across the board risk averse in terms of saving/investing; they will choose the safest-sounding, most conventional place to put their money 999 times out of 1000.

You are almost never going to find a chick heavily invested in the stock market, or crypto, or buying up real estate (except maybe as part of her 401k... even then it will probably all be in mutual funds that someone picked for her), for instance.

Chase

 

[Skills]

Agree with the main thrust of the post, @POB.

Unless you are choosing a supremely placid girl, all women come with some degree of drama / problems / etc.

This is worsened by the "when women are venting about problems to you, it is not actually because they want your help solving them" phenomenon:

Which is part of why it feels like they are "living in chaos" -- often they will have some problem but not do anything about it and refuse to let you do anything about it either!

---

Yeah, the "bad with money" type is a certain type of girl (well, several certain types).

I cannot say I have ever had a girlfriend who was bad with money. Some of my chicks have been real skinflints

One used to get annoyed at me whenever I bought groceries at the market because she could find them cheaper online.

The spending thing is more down to what types of girls you are into / what you are screening for in your women.

Nevertheless, there are definitely plenty of people out there who are awful with their money... both male and female...

And women are almost across the board risk averse in terms of saving/investing; they will choose the safest-sounding, most conventional place to put their money 999 times out of 1000.

You are almost never going to find a chick heavily invested in the stock market, or crypto, or buying up real estate (except maybe as part of her 401k... even then it will probably all be in mutual funds that someone picked for her), for instance.

Chase

Yes the thing is when you get those types like op... Which i had 3 like that... I remember is 3 too much they age you and stress you 50 years.... And you never see them coming at times, while you realize is late...

But i am in the lending i see both men and women with op traits... Kind of equally..

 

[Energy]

But i am in the lending i see both men and women with op traits... Kind of equally.

So instead of "Women are a mess by nature!" as OP said, should we say " People are a mess by nature" ?

Back when I was a socially retarted nerd, I used to hate people for that exact reason: they are unpredictable.

 

[POB]

That is not most women that is just a segment of women... The woman that struggle with finances are some women that have a bunch of kids at times... Women that just got divorced or broke up after years of 2 incomes.... And third world low middle class or poor... And a lot of online girls in the damage good segment...

Not what I'm talking about, although that's a segment for sure.

Talking about in general, because women that are not going through difficulties (and even well-off financially) can still mess up your life.
Going serious means you have to do your diligence and scoop everything about her present and past life.
That was the goal of the post:
- fix your shit first;
- then protect it;
- then go detective mode if you think she's main material;
- then get together;

Those girls should not make it to main anyway...

The ones you said, no, they shouldn't.
The ones I talked about can and probably will.
They generally just need a stable masculine presence to help fix their issues...but it takes time.

In usa women are doing pretty good a majority better than dudes financially...

And?
If they can't control their shit, making a lot of money doesn't mean they are stable.
Most of them will take major financial decisions, using their emotions or too much fear, which is a recipe for disaster.
Couple that with their usual lack of accountability and the situation can become problematic in a very short time.

Are 1 out of 10 fuck bodies fall in there max 2... Main maybe 1 out of 20...

For example my main has no debt, has different investments, make a lot of money... Doesn't match anything in the op...

Again, you are talking extremes (and your personal experience, which is a very unique case).
I am talking the general female population and the majority of guys that will get together with them.
Most dudes don't have our relationship experience, our frame or our stability and safeguards in order.

Check @Chase 's comment, he got the gist of it.

 

[mirror]

I cannot say I have ever had a girlfriend who was bad with money. Some of my chicks have been real skinflints

One used to get annoyed at me whenever I bought groceries at the market because she could find them cheaper online.

I know some women like this. But it's a pro and con both. Life is a lot about reward- time expenditure balances. If you save up a few bucks by buying cheaper groceries. Is it worth it in the end if you spent an hour extra (including extra traveltime and the mental expenditure)

 

[POB]

I know some women like this. But it's a pro and con both. Life is a lot about reward- time expenditure balances. If you save up a few bucks by buying cheaper groceries. Is it worth it in the end if you spent an hour extra (including extra traveltime and the mental expenditure)

Still have to find a girl who has an organized financial spreadsheet that's been constantly updated.
All responsible chicks I've met usually focus on saving the pennies, while forgetting about growing the dollars.

 

[mirror]

Still have to find a girl who has an organized financial spreadsheet that's been constantly updated.
All responsible chicks I've met usually focus on saving the pennies, while forgetting about growing the dollars.

I am not sure an organized financial spreadsheet equals being good with money. That said, interesting, maybe i just had a skewed sample.

 

[Chase]

Still have to find a girl who has an organized financial spreadsheet that's been constantly updated.
All responsible chicks I've met usually focus on saving the pennies, while forgetting about growing the dollars.

You need to look for the female entrepreneurs.

Women running their own businesses, especially ones with growing businesses, tend to be the very few financial growth-oriented women.

The rest have the ol' wage earner mentality -- you only get whatever you make from work, with no easy way to earn more (unless she has a side hustle... in which case she is by definition an entrepreneur!).

If money is limited (due to a limited salary that cannot easily be increased), the only way to get more money is by trimming expenses -- unless you know how to invest, which women generally don't.

I had a conversation in 2019 with a chick in finance arguing that dollars were a better investment than investments where I said, "Are you telling me that you believe that over the next five years, the dollar is going to go UP in value compared to stocks, bonds, gold, Bitcoin, and real estate?" She said "Yes!" And I said, "So you're telling me that five years from now, stocks, bonds, gold, Bitcoin, and real estate are all going to be worth LESS in dollars than they are today?" And she said "Yes!" Then told me I should trust her because she knew finance, lol.

5 years later... checked her predictions...

2024 vs. 2019, price in USD:

• US real estate: +60%
• US stocks: +70%
• Gold: +80%
• Bond yield: 3x
• Bitcoin: +1200%

We can say she was a tad off the mark...

 

[MrVariety]

I can't agree with the negative sentiment of women regarding money and personal lives (I've dated women that have inspired me - who have been entrepreneurial and made more money than I have.)

First order of the day is to get your shit together and make sure everything you've built with sweat and tears is well protected.
Only then you should invite that chaos to bash against your tall impenetrable wall.

But this I can relate to.

It seems like every time I get my shit straight (Clean diet, strict sleep schedule, savings, asceticism, self-restraint, routines in general) it's almost as if the universe is like "Hey look at this asshole being all orderly and shit - let's throw a woman in his face, see how he deals with that!"

Inevitably my sleep schedule gets fucked - diet becomes flexible - morning routine's spiritual exercises replaced by oxytocin - back to consuming stimulants - becoming more generous with my spendings - overall I tend to develop more of a "fuck it" attitude and I let her this chaotic being called woman bend and twist my orderliness.

I like to think of order and chaos attract each other. So when I let her chaos affect me - the universe (i like to imagine to myself) says, "cool, that worked. i balanced that pretentious guy out. that woman is needed elsewhere now"

Then I dwell in chaos for a while, gradually get more orderly again, and the cycle continues.

I agree - don't go with the flow. Build an impenetrable wall - and constantly be diligent on maintaining the structure.

Mr Variety

 

[POB]

I can't agree with the negative sentiment of women regarding money and personal lives (I've dated women that have inspired me - who have been entrepreneurial and made more money than I have.)

Yeah, and the exceptions prove the rule.
Its not a negative OP, not trying to be negative at all!
Just stating something that I've been observing for a long time, including key stuff from my personal life.
Also don't forget, this is the internet...a little drama and alarmism sell better than something bland ; )

But this I can relate to.

It seems like every time I get my shit straight (Clean diet, strict sleep schedule, savings, asceticism, self-restraint, routines in general) it's almost as if the universe is like "Hey look at this asshole being all orderly and shit - let's throw a woman in his face, see how he deals with that!"

Hahahaha, my experience too!

Inevitably my sleep schedule gets fucked - diet becomes flexible - morning routine's spiritual exercises replaced by oxytocin - back to consuming stimulants - becoming more generous with my spendings - overall I tend to develop more of a "fuck it" attitude and I let her this chaotic being called woman bend and twist my orderliness.

I like to think of order and chaos attract each other. So when I let her chaos affect me - the universe (i like to imagine to myself) says, "cool, that worked. i balanced that pretentious guy out. that woman is needed elsewhere now"
Then I dwell in chaos for a while, gradually get more orderly again, and the cycle continues.

Same thing here, glad someone else feels the same.

I agree - don't go with the flow. Build an impenetrable wall - and constantly be diligent on maintaining the structure.

As you get older and more experienced, my guess is that you gonna feel less and less affected by this phenomenom.
Hapenned with me at least.

 

[POB]

You need to look for the female entrepreneurs.

Women running their own businesses, especially ones with growing businesses, tend to be the very few financial growth-oriented women.

This is one of the few instances I tend to agree with the red pill.
Those women are too competitive for my taste.
Can make great FBs, for sure, but not relationship material in my book (unless they choose to revert back to a more family oriented persona).

The rest have the ol' wage earner mentality -- you only get whatever you make from work, with no easy way to earn more (unless she has a side hustle... in which case she is by definition an entrepreneur!).

If money is limited (due to a limited salary that cannot easily be increased), the only way to get more money is by trimming expenses -- unless you know how to invest, which women generally don't.

Agree 100%

I had a conversation in 2019 with a chick in finance arguing that dollars were a better investment than investments where I said, "Are you telling me that you believe that over the next five years, the dollar is going to go UP in value compared to stocks, bonds, gold, Bitcoin, and real estate?" She said "Yes!" And I said, "So you're telling me that five years from now, stocks, bonds, gold, Bitcoin, and real estate are all going to be worth LESS in dollars than they are today?" And she said "Yes!" Then told me I should trust her because she knew finance, lol.

5 years later... checked her predictions...

2024 vs. 2019, price in USD:

• US real estate: +60%
• US stocks: +70%
• Gold: +80%
• Bond yield: 3x
• Bitcoin: +1200%

Call me a pig, but I never get financial advice from women (even sucessfull ones)