Motivation to Write Gone

[Troy]

Hey everyone,

It's been quite a while since I made a decent post and I think it's time I start once again. I completed exams two weeks ago and I have had more than enough free time that could have been spent on here. Though I have been procrastinating a whole lot. I should have been typing field reports regularly because I have been going out regularly. I should have posted observations on my calls. Every weekend I call 3 girls between 11pm to 6am and I practice holding 2 hours of conversation. There is so much I could have reflected on but haven't. I've gotten so much feedback from girls and been my own boss in having a good idea how to tackle some problems.

Yet all this is farsi I say because I haven't written any of it down. All my night outs end up forgotten . I'm supposed to keep a daily journal and I haven't been doing that.

I've realized that everything I start off liking I eventually end up getting bored of. It feels taxing to do damn near everything lately.

Gym is no longer fun: I feel like a slave

Cooking is no longer enticing: feels like I am stabbing myself to prepare food.

Etc.... Everything I start off liking then eventually stop doing . Especially the things that I really should be doing. I should be working on my summer body, I should be cooking everyday to continue developing my tasty food, and I should be keeping my daily journal and writing field reports regularly on here.


All what I'm saying comes down to motivation. When motivation is lost how do I get it back?

How do I get that push to be on here more often? I've seen so many posts that I'd love to join in and help but guess what...... I didn't feel the motivation . Heck I don't feel motivated to do my own work so I can't even think about that.

How do I get back that motivation to write every day. I need to keep my journal full and the boards active... Meaning I'm here helping out wherever and whenever and writing my field reports.

Troy

 

[PrettyDecent]

Hey Troy,

Sure man, all good, we all take breaks from the boards periodically.

On your losing motivation for different stuff - sometimes its good to look at something inspirational in the field you'd like to live up to. In my own fitness goals, transformational videos have made me reassess why I go to the gym, and defined exactly what body I want to aim for. Food for thought maybe in your other pursuits as well.

~Nick

 

[Lover]

There are two things to consider when talking about motivation
- The effort that is needed
- The outcome that is wanted

Troy, when I read your post, it sounds like you have lost the will to put in the effort that is needed to do the things you like. And that's fine, it happens to all of us.
- Gym? You feel like a slave.
- Cooking? You don't feel like preparing the food (= don't feel like putting in the effort to cook).
- All your "I should be doing this and that..."? Yeah, you should definitely be doing them, but are you willing to use the necessary amount of effort?

I meet these kind of challenges all the time myself.
- The study that I wanted to begin with so bad? It bores me now...
- The appartment I moved into? Cleaning it up the whole time seems like an endless road...
- The work that I began a year ago? It's no fun anymore...
- The seduction sphere that I explored? It's complex and time-consuming...

In April and May this year I was so tired of everything. Or, said with other words, I was tired of the EFFORT THAT WAS NEEDED to do these challenges. I felt motivated, but I wasn't motivated enough to use right amount of effort. I procrastinated A LOT. Tried to discover a way to be more mature about these challenges.

A few weeks ago I thought to myself "okay, I don't feel like putting effort into doing anything. Maybe I should ask myself once more, what is my purpose to do the things I do? What outcome do I want/expect?" At first this may seem obvious: you join the gym because you want to get in better shape, you cook because you want to be a better cook or do healthy meals, you join GC Boards because you want to do better with girls. You begin to do these small tasks everyday because you have a purpose. But then this happens

I've realized that everything I start off liking I eventually end up getting bored of.

And I think many of us, especially the inexperienced ones of us, struggle with this particular issue. We try something new, we set ourselves a goal, but then we get bored of it.

Where do you go from here?
- You remind yourself why you do the things you do. (Why am I writing this journey/FR/LR? Because I want to get better with girls)
- And also, you accept that it might bore you now, but it will be beneficial in the long run. (Oh my god, am I going to type another post to my journey? I don't feel like it.. fuck no... not another long post.. I don't even remember all the details... aaaaaaarh, fuck it. I might be bored to hell writing this, but I have to/want to get better with girls. I'll be glad I posted this in a month.)

Especially the last part about accepting boredom while doing the things you want is important. Basically you tell yourself that you want to see yourself succeed. And when you finally finish a task, you'll be more happy/satisfied that you finished the task rather than doing nothing.

If one could stay motivated the whole time while doing the things he likes/wants, he would be the man. Unfortunately the human brain doesn't work like that. You can't stay motivated 24/7. What separates you from any other guy is whether you have the guts to keep doing things even when you don't want to. This is what separates the master seducer from any regular joe, or what separates the professional boxers from regular boxers: the persistence to keep going at all times.

Hope this is helpful.

a-jay

 

[Drck]

"Gym is no longer fun: I feel like a slave"
>>>> Of course, we are not machines. We need rest, we need change. A good way (IMO) to see it is, that if you feel good, rested and motivated you should do your best. Say your goal is to run 5 miles 3x per week at high speed, so simply do your best when you have the energy and motivation. Then once you get tired, IMO good is to remain doing 5 miles but just 1-2x week, but this time at low energy, even just walking is good.

Or when you are tired and unmotivated, try to do some baseline, say pull ups, 5 reps x 5 series per day, 5 days a week. 1 serie in am, 2 when you get home, and 2 in the evening. Good enough, you won't even get tired but it is still 25 pull ups a day, and 100 pull ups per week. 400 per month - that is A LOT, especially if you consider this just as a "resting" state. Most guys don't even do fraction of that...

Then when you feel motivated and full of energy, simply start adding to it. Now you'll be able to do easily say 6-7 series of 8 reps pull ups in between other exercises in gym. Add bench or overhead. Add dead-lift, squats, dips, or whatever you do in gym. Add slowly more and more weight each exercise so your body gets used to increasing load, you don't want to get exhausted and burned. After some time, hopefully couple of months, you'll get tired again, you'll max your weights and reps - so simply drop everything and stick to some baseline, this times say just lighter dead-lift, 5x5 250 pounds 3x per week... That's 75,000 pounds lifted in 1 month, and again - that is a huge amount just for "resting" state, most guys don't do it at all. Lot's of muscles and lots of burned calories for minimal work... Good enough just for maintenance, till your body and mind is rested enough again...

Of course if you motivation is to be top performing athlete, body builder or power-lifter, this style will not work for you. But if you just want to be strong, healthy and in great shape, that's all you really need...

The same with everything else. Treat yourself and go get food in a restaurant. Stop approaching 10 girls, just do 1 or 2 for some time. Write 1 paragraph in stead of 10 ...

 

[Troy]

Pretty Decent, A - Jay , and Drck, thanks for the advice. I haven't been motivated to write at all. Though for my journal I know it's very important I push myself to write even two lines daily. I find that simplifying things makes me motivated to do things again. For example : before I had two apps on my tablet used to keep daily journals. One for goals and aspirations and one for " what happened today stuff ". I cut that out and now I'm using one journal app, that is Diaro. If anyone wants to keep a personal journal I advice you use Diaro. It's the best right now.

As a side note, I can't wait till google releases a journal app that can sync online for free ( I'm going off target slightly... I want to say though if anyone else has interest in using a journal app on any device, please to contact google or comment below one of their articles and request that a journal app be made. They have google keep which keeps notes and it's superb. I never lose anything. )

Sure man, all good, we all take breaks from the boards periodically.

Smile

All your "I should be doing this and that..."? Yeah, you should definitely be doing them, but are you willing to use the necessary amount of effort?

I'm willing :/ just no active willingness. All talk.. Yes I want to... I don't feel like though... Yes I need to do xyz...then I can't bother because it feels like too much work.

Where do you go from here?
- You remind yourself why you do the things you do. (Why am I writing this journey/FR/LR? Because I want to get better with girls)
- And also, you accept that it might bore you now, but it will be beneficial in the long run. (Oh my god, am I going to type another post to my journey? I don't feel like it.. fuck no... not another long post.. I don't even remember all the details... aaaaaaarh, fuck it. I might be bored to hell writing this, but I have to/want to get better with girls. I'll be glad I posted this in a month.)

Lol I definitely will be glad. The past few weeks and months I wrote a few lines in my journal and I'm glad I did. OK great piece of advice. Your advice makes me feel motivated.

The same with everything else. Treat yourself and go get food in a restaurant. Stop approaching 10 girls, just do 1 or 2 for some time. Write 1 paragraph in stead of 10

I definitely agree smile.


PS. Sorry I took so long to get back to my own tread. Hopefully I'll get motivated enough to be back here helping out and writing my own posts ( questions, field reports) etc. Soon.

Thanks again

Troy