- Joined
- Mar 21, 2017
- Messages
- 2
Hi everyone,
First let me explain my situation a little bit. I am turning 17 in a few months, still live with my parents and can't really go on dates with women yet, I just don't have the logistics for that. Mostly focusing on fundamentals and conversational skills for the moment.
I am a grounded, mature guy, and already have strong core-purposes in my life. I have been actively working on getting solid fundamentals in the past few months, and am constantly getting checked out by chicks of all ages in public transport, but I never return their gaze. And I can't grow facial hair yet.
I also became good at deep-diving and using attraction-enhancing techniques since I started to seek improvement in those fields.
I recently became quite fucking confident around girls, at least compared to the old me (needy, nice guy).
I never kissed a girl, had a girlfriend or had sex.
This was the first time I took a girl on a date (and had the possibility to), and the first time I attempted to bed one.
So I was at a small party with Taiwanese friends (I live in France, and am russian). There was this hot japanese girl who came an hour into the party. By the way she dressed and acted, I could say she was on peak fertility. She's a "westernized" asian girl, the strong type. In fact I later found out Nicky Minaj was her idol.
I was already pre-selected, as she saw me in good conversations with other girls and I was the most attractive guy at the party, and when I got the chance, opened her. Went straight on to deep-dive her, for about 20 minutes. Used some flirting, sexual innuendos and chase framings as well, which she always seemed to enjoy (smile, laughter, saying "OMG).
Eventually she spent the rest of the night talking with a guy friend, and I came up to them from time to time to make some sexual innuendos, and I could say she loved it. I left without even saying bye, had to catch the last bus home, but a few hours later contacted her on Facebook, and set up a date for the next day.
The girl is 24. She never had really good sex. She has an american boyfriend, I later discovered they are in a long-distance relationship and she already cheated on him 3 times. The guy is "very nice, but so boring". She isn't really attracted to him (6 on a scale of 10), and would dump him the moment she found a better prospect. As she was in peak fertility, I figured I had a shot with her. She came here for 2 weeks and was leaving the city in 4 days. I set the date up near her place, and bought condoms for the first time in my life. Eventually I wouldn't get the chance to use them (at least I learned how to use them).
Followed the same routines like the day before, deep-dive, attraction-enhancing technniques+sex topics and some incidental and leading touch. Only difference is we spent most of the time walking (I had invited her to taste the best frozen yoghurt in Paris, we split the check). And we walked very close to each other from the outset, our arms were touching. Only problem was eye-contact was not very strong because of that.
I got 2 opportunities to show social dominance. First one was when some black homo came to sit down next to me when we were sitting with the girl on a bench in a park. He wanted money for food and was desperate and agressive. Eventually after some beating around the bush, I shut him down hard while staying relatively efortless, the guy apologized and left.
Second one was when a lot of people started to run, in our direction, shouting, running away from something. At first I thought it was another terror attack. The girl got scared but I stayed unfazed. Turned out it was immigrants running away from the police. She exclaimed "How come you stay so calm!?".
Overall we had a great, open-minded, fliryt vibe.
All of that took about 45 minutes. In the next 45 minutes I would convince her to go to her place, attempt physical escalation, fail and leave.
I made the "go to her place" part not a big deal, even though she resisted a little bit (room is messy and that kind of stuff), and she later said "I can't believe this happening" while we were entering the house where she lived
Eventually, after some minutes in her appartment, I came up to her, to smell the perfume in her neck, she freaked out a bit, I let her go.
At first she wouldn't let me close to her, but I persisted and at one point, she was staring out of the window, I was by her side, caressing her butt and hips, whispering with a soft and sexy voice into her ears, and I can tell she got really horny at that point. Her excitement then gradually faded.
After that she kept running away from me, but returned to me several times, with open body language and close physcial proximity, giving me the chance to convince her of sleeping with me.
I knew she wanted sex, and it turned out her LMR was because of her boyfriend. She said she would feel guilty, that she would regret it and that it was wrong.
Remember, this was the first time I ever pushed a girl for sex, you could imagine how I felt.
My mistake was not pushing forward and hard enough with the physical escalation. I probably should have mandhandle-kissed her, I realized aftewards, That would probably have helped. But I was kinda anxious about going for the make-out, as I never kissed a girl before, and even though I know the theory, putting it into practice is another thing entirely!
I should probably have been more dominant, and at the same time, leave time between the escalation attempts for her to relax, maybe use fractionation, but instead I was just chasing around after her, being needy and weak at the same time
I had to take the lead, and I didn't.
She wanted sex emotionally, but resisted logically. Words were no good for convincing her, and that's where I failed, I tried to convince her logically of sleeping with me, and failed to make her emotionnal needs over-ride her logical resistance.
First I was saying stuff like "Your body wants it, but your mind tries to convince you otherwise" which worked ok, even though she kept denying.
When she brought up the boyfriend, I started to try convincing her that cheating on him a fourth time was okay, and that was when she turned from forgiving into, more or less hostile. I just didn't what else to say!
She then backward-rationalized, saying she fucked up.
Eventually after persisting several times, but in a very weak way, I left, knowing it wouldn't lead me anywhere.
My last words to her were "I am not the one who is going to cry tonight", and she actually laughed at that!
When I got out, she double-locked her door
So there you are, a girl who was horny, was open to having sex with me, which could have happened, if I had any experience in sexual escalation with girls in general and girls who put up a lot of resistance particularly, and if I was better at handling women's objections.
Still, I played to win, and did the best I could at my current skill level, and shit, that was actually fucking awesome! Even 2 days ago, I would never have imagined myself being able to do this kind of stuff!
I do feel a bit down now, if the sex part is always that hard, is it really worth it I ask myself?
Anyway, thanks for reading! Could you explain me what you would have done differently, and how you would have proceeded if you were in my place, for the escalation part?
Thanks in advance,
Cat
First let me explain my situation a little bit. I am turning 17 in a few months, still live with my parents and can't really go on dates with women yet, I just don't have the logistics for that. Mostly focusing on fundamentals and conversational skills for the moment.
I am a grounded, mature guy, and already have strong core-purposes in my life. I have been actively working on getting solid fundamentals in the past few months, and am constantly getting checked out by chicks of all ages in public transport, but I never return their gaze. And I can't grow facial hair yet.
I also became good at deep-diving and using attraction-enhancing techniques since I started to seek improvement in those fields.
I recently became quite fucking confident around girls, at least compared to the old me (needy, nice guy).
I never kissed a girl, had a girlfriend or had sex.
This was the first time I took a girl on a date (and had the possibility to), and the first time I attempted to bed one.
So I was at a small party with Taiwanese friends (I live in France, and am russian). There was this hot japanese girl who came an hour into the party. By the way she dressed and acted, I could say she was on peak fertility. She's a "westernized" asian girl, the strong type. In fact I later found out Nicky Minaj was her idol.
I was already pre-selected, as she saw me in good conversations with other girls and I was the most attractive guy at the party, and when I got the chance, opened her. Went straight on to deep-dive her, for about 20 minutes. Used some flirting, sexual innuendos and chase framings as well, which she always seemed to enjoy (smile, laughter, saying "OMG).
Eventually she spent the rest of the night talking with a guy friend, and I came up to them from time to time to make some sexual innuendos, and I could say she loved it. I left without even saying bye, had to catch the last bus home, but a few hours later contacted her on Facebook, and set up a date for the next day.
The girl is 24. She never had really good sex. She has an american boyfriend, I later discovered they are in a long-distance relationship and she already cheated on him 3 times. The guy is "very nice, but so boring". She isn't really attracted to him (6 on a scale of 10), and would dump him the moment she found a better prospect. As she was in peak fertility, I figured I had a shot with her. She came here for 2 weeks and was leaving the city in 4 days. I set the date up near her place, and bought condoms for the first time in my life. Eventually I wouldn't get the chance to use them (at least I learned how to use them).
Followed the same routines like the day before, deep-dive, attraction-enhancing technniques+sex topics and some incidental and leading touch. Only difference is we spent most of the time walking (I had invited her to taste the best frozen yoghurt in Paris, we split the check). And we walked very close to each other from the outset, our arms were touching. Only problem was eye-contact was not very strong because of that.
I got 2 opportunities to show social dominance. First one was when some black homo came to sit down next to me when we were sitting with the girl on a bench in a park. He wanted money for food and was desperate and agressive. Eventually after some beating around the bush, I shut him down hard while staying relatively efortless, the guy apologized and left.
Second one was when a lot of people started to run, in our direction, shouting, running away from something. At first I thought it was another terror attack. The girl got scared but I stayed unfazed. Turned out it was immigrants running away from the police. She exclaimed "How come you stay so calm!?".
Overall we had a great, open-minded, fliryt vibe.
All of that took about 45 minutes. In the next 45 minutes I would convince her to go to her place, attempt physical escalation, fail and leave.
I made the "go to her place" part not a big deal, even though she resisted a little bit (room is messy and that kind of stuff), and she later said "I can't believe this happening" while we were entering the house where she lived
Eventually, after some minutes in her appartment, I came up to her, to smell the perfume in her neck, she freaked out a bit, I let her go.
At first she wouldn't let me close to her, but I persisted and at one point, she was staring out of the window, I was by her side, caressing her butt and hips, whispering with a soft and sexy voice into her ears, and I can tell she got really horny at that point. Her excitement then gradually faded.
After that she kept running away from me, but returned to me several times, with open body language and close physcial proximity, giving me the chance to convince her of sleeping with me.
I knew she wanted sex, and it turned out her LMR was because of her boyfriend. She said she would feel guilty, that she would regret it and that it was wrong.
Remember, this was the first time I ever pushed a girl for sex, you could imagine how I felt.
My mistake was not pushing forward and hard enough with the physical escalation. I probably should have mandhandle-kissed her, I realized aftewards, That would probably have helped. But I was kinda anxious about going for the make-out, as I never kissed a girl before, and even though I know the theory, putting it into practice is another thing entirely!
I should probably have been more dominant, and at the same time, leave time between the escalation attempts for her to relax, maybe use fractionation, but instead I was just chasing around after her, being needy and weak at the same time
I had to take the lead, and I didn't.
She wanted sex emotionally, but resisted logically. Words were no good for convincing her, and that's where I failed, I tried to convince her logically of sleeping with me, and failed to make her emotionnal needs over-ride her logical resistance.
First I was saying stuff like "Your body wants it, but your mind tries to convince you otherwise" which worked ok, even though she kept denying.
When she brought up the boyfriend, I started to try convincing her that cheating on him a fourth time was okay, and that was when she turned from forgiving into, more or less hostile. I just didn't what else to say!
She then backward-rationalized, saying she fucked up.
Eventually after persisting several times, but in a very weak way, I left, knowing it wouldn't lead me anywhere.
My last words to her were "I am not the one who is going to cry tonight", and she actually laughed at that!
When I got out, she double-locked her door
So there you are, a girl who was horny, was open to having sex with me, which could have happened, if I had any experience in sexual escalation with girls in general and girls who put up a lot of resistance particularly, and if I was better at handling women's objections.
Still, I played to win, and did the best I could at my current skill level, and shit, that was actually fucking awesome! Even 2 days ago, I would never have imagined myself being able to do this kind of stuff!
I do feel a bit down now, if the sex part is always that hard, is it really worth it I ask myself?
Anyway, thanks for reading! Could you explain me what you would have done differently, and how you would have proceeded if you were in my place, for the escalation part?
Thanks in advance,
Cat