Need Some Advice on a situation....

[Vibes34]

Hey Guys,

Need some help with a situation cos im completely baffled.

So i meet this girl at some art show. We start chatting and having a laugh, shes not the greatest look ever but I i thought i'd try and see if I could use the situation to refine my skills and maybe get laid.

Anyway we are chatting and she's telling me the men she has slept with lately arent performing, obviously i offer to 'help out'. We have some semi lewd banter. Anyway she askd for my FB. We send a few flirty/factual messages during the week. She invites me to a club with friends, i decline as its not a good environment/situation to move in, i ask for her number. We text a couple of boring things about how our nights went. Then out the blue shes like 'i had company last night ;-)' and im like 'oh yeah, what happened'. Shes like ' a girl never tells'. Obviously i didnt reply

I'm thinking she thinks I'm her mate now or something. Thing is its only been a week, we are definitely not mates, I have invested fuck all. So why did she pull this shit on me? She seemed genuinely on eh case with me.

 

[Richard]

Vibes, sad to say but she wasn't on the chase for you, and if she was, its very mild, and won't bother her if you two have anything or not.

First off, I know she wasn't too heavily interested because she used FB as a deflection to not actually get her number, and you were okay with that, essentially, you already gave in to her by not persisting with the number.

Then, when you asked for her number over FB, she ignored it, and instead talked about how she had company for the night.

Women love sex! social consciousness forbids them from acting as they'd wish to, and I'm going to assume she had the intention of fucking you once as a one night stand and probably not hit you up again. However, you declined her offer, and she found somebody else with no problems. This means she is social, she knows how to play the game, and she definitely played it well.

However, post anything up if things change. If she messages you, or anything of the sort, post it up.
-Richard

 

[trashKENNUT]

Anyway we are chatting and she's telling me the men she has slept with lately arent performing, obviously i offer to 'help out'. We have some semi lewd banter. Anyway she askd for my FB. We send a few flirty/factual messages during the week. She invites me to a club with friends, i decline as its not a good environment/situation to move in, i ask for her number. We text a couple of boring things about how our nights went. Then out the blue shes like 'i had company last night ;-)' and im like 'oh yeah, what happened'. Shes like ' a girl never tells'. Obviously i didnt reply

I'm thinking she thinks I'm her mate now or something. Thing is its only been a week, we are definitely not mates, I have invested fuck all. So why did she pull this shit on me? She seemed genuinely on eh case with me.

Erm it would have been good if you decline her fb, and you took more control of everything. She still finds you cool, so she's putting you in the back burner now.

She texting she had company last night was her going to put you in the back burner. This girl can be two things,

1) Date guys who have been treating her like shit.
2) The guys she's dating isn't so much as good or cool as you, but you still fucked up. So putting you in queue seems like a good idea.

Zac

 

[Vibes34]

DOUBLE POST* PLEASE DELETE THIS

 

[Vibes34]

Vibes, sad to say but she wasn't on the chase for you, and if she was, its very mild, and won't bother her if you two have anything or not.

First off, I know she wasn't too heavily interested because she used FB as a deflection to not actually get her number, and you were okay with that, essentially, you already gave in to her by not persisting with the number.

Then, when you asked for her number over FB, she ignored it, and instead talked about how she had company for the night.

Women love sex! social consciousness forbids them from acting as they'd wish to, and I'm going to assume she had the intention of fucking you once as a one night stand and probably not hit you up again. However, you declined her offer, and she found somebody else with no problems. This means she is social, she knows how to play the game, and she definitely played it well.

However, post anything up if things change. If she messages you, or anything of the sort, post it up.
-Richard

Anyway we are chatting and she's telling me the men she has slept with lately arent performing, obviously i offer to 'help out'. We have some semi lewd banter. Anyway she askd for my FB. We send a few flirty/factual messages during the week. She invites me to a club with friends, i decline as its not a good environment/situation to move in, i ask for her number. We text a couple of boring things about how our nights went. Then out the blue shes like 'i had company last night ;-)' and im like 'oh yeah, what happened'. Shes like ' a girl never tells'. Obviously i didnt reply

I'm thinking she thinks I'm her mate now or something. Thing is its only been a week, we are definitely not mates, I have invested fuck all. So why did she pull this shit on me? She seemed genuinely on eh case with me.

Erm it would have been good if you decline her fb, and you took more control of everything. She still finds you cool, so she's putting you in the back burner now.

She texting she had company last night was her going to put you in the back burner. This girl can be two things,

1) Date guys who have been treating her like shit.
2) The guys she's dating isn't so much as good or cool as you, but you still fucked up. So putting you in queue seems like a good idea.

Zac

Hey thanks for your replys. I need to give more info I think... We were messaging on FB for a bit and most of it was very sexual flirty banter about mens stamina etc and sex. I made it VERY clear that I was looking to get in her pants, but in a light hearted but very obvious fun/flirty way. I politely declined when she invited me to the club on friday, then I asked her number and she gave it straight away over FB. I text her a couple of times and she replied straight away about how her night on friday went on saturday. She then texts me sunday morning out the blue asking how my night went, then I say good etc and then I ask about hers again and she drops ' i had company etc'.

I agree i may have been too slow but the window was ridiculously small, also chase always says decline club offers etc in favour of trying to meet them on their own. What baffles me is when i read the messages back she is so clearly on my case, no way it could be misconstrued. Winks and sexual references all over the shop.

Never in my whole life has a girl who was been this on my case suddenly dropped that kind of shit out the blue, in fact all the girls I have got together with NEVER mentioned random guys coming over to fuck them at any point in the lead up.

 

[Franco]

Vibes,

So i meet this girl at some art show. We start chatting and having a laugh, shes not the greatest look ever but I i thought i'd try and see if I could use the situation to refine my skills and maybe get laid.

Anyway we are chatting and she's telling me the men she has slept with lately arent performing, obviously i offer to 'help out'. We have some semi lewd banter. Anyway she askd for my FB. We send a few flirty/factual messages during the week. She invites me to a club with friends, i decline as its not a good environment/situation to move in, i ask for her number. We text a couple of boring things about how our nights went. Then out the blue shes like 'i had company last night ;-)' and im like 'oh yeah, what happened'. Shes like ' a girl never tells'. Obviously i didnt reply

I'm thinking she thinks I'm her mate now or something. Thing is its only been a week, we are definitely not mates, I have invested fuck all. So why did she pull this shit on me? She seemed genuinely on eh case with me.

So I read this whole thing, and my first thought was, "why isn't he inviting her to see him?"

You can't really determine anything about what she wants until you invite her on a date or directly over to your place and see if she accepts. It doesn't matter what she says about other men -- just laugh it off, lightly poke fun at their incompetence, and then invite her to see you. She might be using all this talk of other guys just to see if it affects you, and currently, it is.

If you keep talking to her about all this without asking her to see you, then yes, she will begin to see you as her mate. So invite her to see you, and find out if she's interested.

- Franco

 

[Vibes34]

Vibes,

So i meet this girl at some art show. We start chatting and having a laugh, shes not the greatest look ever but I i thought i'd try and see if I could use the situation to refine my skills and maybe get laid.

Anyway we are chatting and she's telling me the men she has slept with lately arent performing, obviously i offer to 'help out'. We have some semi lewd banter. Anyway she askd for my FB. We send a few flirty/factual messages during the week. She invites me to a club with friends, i decline as its not a good environment/situation to move in, i ask for her number. We text a couple of boring things about how our nights went. Then out the blue shes like 'i had company last night ;-)' and im like 'oh yeah, what happened'. Shes like ' a girl never tells'. Obviously i didnt reply

I'm thinking she thinks I'm her mate now or something. Thing is its only been a week, we are definitely not mates, I have invested fuck all. So why did she pull this shit on me? She seemed genuinely on eh case with me.

So I read this whole thing, and my first thought was, "why isn't he inviting her to see him?"

You can't really determine anything about what she wants until you invite her on a date or directly over to your place and see if she accepts. It doesn't matter what she says about other men -- just laugh it off, lightly poke fun at their incompetence, and then invite her to see you. She might be using all this talk of other guys just to see if it affects you, and currently, it is.

If you keep talking to her about all this without asking her to see you, then yes, she will begin to see you as her mate. So invite her to see you, and find out if she's interested.

- Franco

Thanks for your advice Franco. I agree that I should have asked to go for drinks etc a long time ago, and if she was a great looking girl i was really into etc I would have done it straight away, in fact most of the the FB convo would not have even occurred because I would have asked her out, the only thing that put me off was the fact that I'm not actually that into her at all, but i need to get back in the game and saw this as a good option. Also i do not have my own place and still live with parents.

The thing is though it still struck me as completely bizarre why someone would text you in the morning saying 'oh btw im getting banged by somone else' and think it was a good idea to say this to someone you've been flirting with?

Also i'm thinking now she could be an attention seeking nutcase and do I want to open this can of worms at all? Also do i want to try and sleep with some random girl who just got banged by some other clown last week and informed me prior?

Not sure what the next move is...

 

[Franco]

The thing is though it still struck me as completely bizarre why someone would text you in the morning saying 'oh btw im getting banged by somone else' and think it was a good idea to say this to someone you've been flirting with?

This maybe would have struck me as bizarre a few years ago, but not anymore. It IS uncommon behavior... but bizarre? Only if you are unenlightened about the sexuality of women.

Women crave and desire sex and have fantasies that they sometimes can't reveal to anyone, not even their closest friends. So sometimes they will reveal it to a complete stranger in an indirect way... to see if he's the type of guy who will fulfill them. If not, no big deal -- she has no social ties to him (if it was a cold approach) and her reputation is unlikely to take a hit.

For more information, one of our new writers, Peter Fontes, goes into some good detail in this recent article here:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/sexual-awakening-how-have-her-doing-almost-anything-bed

Also i'm thinking now she could be an attention seeking nutcase and do I want to open this can of worms at all? Also do i want to try and sleep with some random girl who just got banged by some other clown last week and informed me prior?

This is possible, but a bit of screening and some time alone with her might reveal whether or not that is the case. It depends on what you are after at the moment; this girl might help give you some experience if you feel like you still have a lot to learn. If you feel like she won't be worth your time and all you want to do is practice cold approaching women, then that is fine too. Just stop contacting her and that will be that.

It's up to you what you want out of the situation, but just make sure you decide what that is before you continue. Always have clear goals in your ahead about where you want an interaction to go before you interact with a girl.

- Franco

 

[Vibes34]

The thing is though it still struck me as completely bizarre why someone would text you in the morning saying 'oh btw im getting banged by somone else' and think it was a good idea to say this to someone you've been flirting with?

This maybe would have struck me as bizarre a few years ago, but not anymore. It IS uncommon behavior... but bizarre? Only if you are unenlightened about the sexuality of women.

Women crave and desire sex and have fantasies that they sometimes can't reveal to anyone, not even their closest friends. So sometimes they will reveal it to a complete stranger in an indirect way... to see if he's the type of guy who will fulfill them. If not, no big deal -- she has no social ties to him (if it was a cold approach) and her reputation is unlikely to take a hit.

For more information, one of our new writers, Peter Fontes, goes into some good detail in this recent article here:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/sexual-awakening-how-have-her-doing-almost-anything-bed

Also i'm thinking now she could be an attention seeking nutcase and do I want to open this can of worms at all? Also do i want to try and sleep with some random girl who just got banged by some other clown last week and informed me prior?

This is possible, but a bit of screening and some time alone with her might reveal whether or not that is the case. It depends on what you are after at the moment; this girl might help give you some experience if you feel like you still have a lot to learn. If you feel like she won't be worth your time and all you want to do is practice cold approaching women, then that is fine too. Just stop contacting her and that will be that.

It's up to you what you want out of the situation, but just make sure you decide what that is before you continue. Always have clear goals in your ahead about where you want an interaction to go before you interact with a girl.

- Franco

Thanks again, the thing is though we're making assumptions that her 'company' was male and that he was definitely banging her. On the other hand this all could just be smoke and mirrors or an effort to piss me off for not asking her out. at the end of the day I just thought she might be good to have a bit of light hearted fun with. Don't really want to bang some girl whos gonna tell me shes getting smashed all over town by other men cos it will just piss me off.

I have a broader aim to sleep with a load of girls and be able to get the girls i like then find nice one and settle down eventually. But in the short term its mainly to get laid and have fun. I'm some what of a paradox in the sense that im hugely social know lots of women, have good women pals and give the impression of being very loud mouthed and controversial I simply dont close very often and never cold approach. Im not that bothered about cold appraoches just when i encounter women i want to be able to get them.

Not sure where to go with this now either, was gonna just try and get laid and have a fun night out etc but this has thrown me off..

 

[Richard]

Argh lol, I was really busy today, and read your reply to Zac and myself, but couldn't write back. Franco beat me to it, and said what I had planned to say. Anyway, follow Franco's advice and things should turn out fine.