Need some thoughts and opinions re an upcoming Bumble date

[Brassfaced_Jim]

So far using OD I think

Yet she is the one that just told you she had another date, that very same night?! Jeez the duplicity of some women...

oh yeah.
The hotter ones all run their “ girl - game “ on guys they are dating.

mod course . I understand and accept it now. It’s just part of the “dance” . Can’t judge em really. They have their own drivers different to us men. It’s complicated stuff their dating lives and the different categories they have to put men in etc and the different roles they have to play.

hot chicks are all actresses to some extent.

I just let them know ( indirectly) that I udnerstand the game and that it’s ok by me. I even tease them a bit and definitely drop chick-lingo and girl code into the convo to let them know I know the score.

they appreciate that makes it easier for them and they can relax and not play me so much

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

I just nudge them more and more to put me into the “ lover man” / player category and just fuck me quickly haha.

very important that part of the game.
To bust out of the traditional dating frame and get faster sex

that’s what all players are very good at.
That’s what chicks refer to as “smooth” or in my case “ cheeky”

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

OD has been treating me well these last 6-8 weeks. Rebooted the profile and paid for Bumble got lots of matches, 1 regular sexy FB now and 2 ONS’. 1 low grade who catfished me, 1 mid grade with sexy face and big cans. 1 sexy got away as per above.
Tuning about 5 others atm. So happy days and happy dating life atm.

 

[Will_V]

@Brassfaced_Jim how old was she? Women around 30-35 can get really brain fried about what it is they want, as that's when they start to run out of time for the babies and white picket fence, while also realizing that maybe their heydays are over and wanting to experience it again.

It does sound like you put yourself between two opposing frames rather than owning your desires. She said herself that you were more straight laced than she was expecting, and yet you made strong, fast sexual moves which suggests you're not straight laced.

The result can be that in her mind you are neither good for an LTR nor exciting/unambiguous enough for a quick bang.

Personally I wouldn't have told her I was open for an LTR, I would simply have made some open-ended statement about seeing where it goes. In this case though, you seem to have actually convinced yourself more than her on that score, and ended up playing things too safe thinking that you had to wear that frame for a while.

Sounds like you did a great job of escalating, but she never quite got you out of the relationship category and ended up with too much dissonance.

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

@Brassfaced_Jim how old was she? Women around 30-35 can get really brain fried about what it is they want, as that's when they start to run out of time for the babies and white picket fence, while also realizing that maybe their heydays are over and wanting to experience it again.

It does sound like you put yourself between two opposing frames rather than owning your desires. She said herself that you were more straight laced than she was expecting, and yet you made strong, fast sexual moves which suggests you're not straight laced.

The result can be that in her mind you are neither good for an LTR nor exciting/unambiguous enough for a quick bang.

Personally I wouldn't have told her I was open for an LTR, I would simply have made some open-ended statement about seeing where it goes. In this case though, you seem to have actually convinced yourself more than her on that score, and ended up playing things too safe thinking that you had to wear that frame for a while.

Sounds like you did a great job of escalating, but she never quite got you out of the relationship category and ended up with too much dissonance.

hmm good points thanks.
She’s late 30s ( I’m early 40s) she has a kid and is only recently separated or divorced 8 month or so.

and she also still lives with her ex hubby.(!!)
She said he’s dating and she’s happy for him. But I was suspect on the whole scenario tbh.

She told me this on date 2 dinner at my place.

So from then on it was kinda a ‘no-go ‘for me as way too complicated and messy for either a bang or LTR. Don’t want no angry dude showing up at my place.

to me, she was on the fence re a bang that night but decided she wanted to try game me into further dates and a relationship.

then left and went on another date straight after no doubt,

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

@Brassfaced_Jim how old was she? Women around 30-35 can get really brain fried about what it is they want, as that's when they start to run out of time for the babies and white picket fence, while also realizing that maybe their heydays are over and wanting to experience it again.

It does sound like you put yourself between two opposing frames rather than owning your desires. She said herself that you were more straight laced than she was expecting, and yet you made strong, fast sexual moves which suggests you're not straight laced.

The result can be that in her mind you are neither good for an LTR nor exciting/unambiguous enough for a quick bang.

Personally I wouldn't have told her I was open for an LTR, I would simply have made some open-ended statement about seeing where it goes. In this case though, you seem to have actually convinced yourself more than her on that score, and ended up playing things too safe thinking that you had to wear that frame for a while.

Sounds like you did a great job of escalating, but she never quite got you out of the relationship category and ended up with too much dissonance.

Well I fully owned my desires and ran my handsy Arousal game on both dates .

I think my ongoing problem ( this is from pre my recent LTR area when I was a “player” also) is that I don’t apply full Chad-like behaviour when I’m just casual dating,

move had many chicks say the following to me

“ you’re different to what I thought , I presumed u would be a dickhead but your actually a normal cool guy”

And

“ most guys that look like you are gronks”
This word Gronk is Aussie girl slang for asshole/ dickhead/ just a sport fuck guy.

I’m being too much of a sweetie still is my problem. Even with my OTT sleazy escalation Arousal game running from the get go on every date.

I always push for the bang.
but I’m full of good personality still. And they all want more then. And this leads to multiple messy situations for me usually.

too many girls on rotation then but also too much listening to them and tryna keep a connection going also.

remenants of my old Nice Guy Syndrome still present I guess

How do I behave more like a “Gronk” is the bit I can’t figure out..,,

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

Update!
I’ve just moved into a new flash place.
Had a chick around say night that gave me an amazing sloppy blowjob downstairs on the couch. Withr the lights dimmed down low. While the female tenant upstairs was in her room.

my friend came around Sunday and pointed out there is a f’n CCTV CAMERA in the corner of the lounge above the couch ! . It’s a “ Swann” model. Googling tells me it has a motion sensor a red dot when it’s recording / streaming , it has a microphone and it also has infra red NIGHT VISION.(!)

the landlady came 3 hrs later to tell me “this is not going to work out u need to move out in 2 weeks”

what a coincidence.
She tells me today when I quizzed her re camera and wtf it’s doing inside ther house - “its a dummy camera non operational “ to scare burglars. What a joke.

I’m furious. I gave her the serve of her life last night raging about it. Threatened to report her to the police etc outrageous .

watch out fellas u may get caught on camera!!!

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

No doubt she was watching the whole thing on a live stream on her phone elsewhere and got the shock of her life. Haha.

I’ll tell the chick and she’ll have a flying monkey to deal with. What a joke. Idiot

 

[Probabka]

huhu

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

huhu

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

So anyone got a link to an article that tells me “how to behave like a dickhead Chad” ?
This is what I need to do.
Thanks in advance