Newbie - Need Help With A Girl I Met At A Party

[ajb1986ajb]

Hi Guys,

I'm just getting into the world of Girlschase and PUA + I would greatly appreciate some advice...

So I was at a Halloween party at the weekend - my flatmate is a french girl who may be keen on me though I'm not sure....anyway, I ended up using some of the techniques learnt so far whilst chatting to one of her hot friends (who I'd met briefly a couple of times before).

I mentioned to the girls before we went that I'd be leaving early to go & meet some friends at another party. So after some good conversation with the hot girl, I decided that I was going to leave the party and kissed her just before leaving.

As I've heard it's usually best to get the girl to ask for your number (to create desire and remain in control) I told her to get my number from my flatmate. Thinking about now, the hot girl is kind of shy so I'm not sure that she'll ask for it.

I've tried to find her on Facebook but no luck so wondering what the best option is now? I know that escalation windows can be very short so any help would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks a lot,

A

 

[ray_zorse]

You kissed her on the lips? Hmm that's not always a good move unless you're in a situation where you can close the deal and escalate to sex. That's because it ruins the tension and doesn't leave her hoping and wondering that you might be into her... basically she knows what's on offer at that point. Although there are some exceptions, for one thing she might be totally into you, or for another thing you might have quickly pulled away leaving her unsatisfied and wanting more...

Now as to the number grab well next time you've got to be a lot more decisive, give her your phone and get those digits, then call her phone to make sure the call goes through. Anything else is just leaving too much up to chance, not only does it look a bit weak and indecisive, but from a practical standpoint it's annoying, you can't easily contact her, you have to wait until you see her next, or you have to do stuff which is indiscreet (like get it from a friend or go to her workplace).

Looking at the situation as it stands well it's lucky you didn't find her on FB, because I have to say that's the most weak and beta way of contacting her ever, it is practically an invitation to her to put you in an orbiter slot. Normally in your case I would say forget about her (game her as normal if you see her again but otherwise get on with your life)... but since you already discussed getting in contact, maybe you can take a risk and get her number from your friend and call her.

If you call her, don't go into any explanations as to how you got her number as that will sound too apologetic. Just say hi there and ask her about her week etc, see if you can get her sharing and achieve a high point in the conversation, or at any rate within 3~4 minutes casually suggest a hangout... maybe ask about her weekend plans or her schedule and then say "hey, so if you're finishing early on Wednesday how about a coffee in town?" and suggest a Starbucks or whatever.

Remember to set up date logistics in small pieces, first get her agreement as to time (it's often recommended to let her nominate a time, since if you start proposing a lot of alternative times it can get a bit chasey, although if you check logistics carefully first you can bend this rule)... and then get her agreement as to place and so on. And read the article "simplify your dates" and other GC material, your idea is basically get her to a neutral location, build some attraction and pull.

Ray

 

[ajb1986ajb]

Thanks a lot for the reply Ray! Yes, I made out with her and I know that it can diffuse sexual tension however, my reasons were that I wanted to:

1) make sure she was clear that I like her
2) leave the party with at least a kiss rather than nothing - although in hindsight this was probably not the best option

I agree that I did mess up with not getting her number - that's true, I could ask my flatmate for her number although may be slightly awkward if she likes me also (she didn't mention anything of it when I saw her the next day surprisingly!). I will remember this lesson for next time!! :-/

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

As for your flatmate get the number from her. Girls are very competitive. Girls also have far less of a code than guys (bro code). They may sit around telling each other they won't mess with guys their friends are interested in but then they will bed the guy. I know twin sisters where the older one was alway stealing the younger ones guys. You will actually be adding value to you in her eyes.

If you want to have some fun escalating things with your flatmate do some things like walk from the shower to your room in your underpants. Walk around without a shirt on. Exercise to where you get sweaty in front of her with no shirt on. Get close to her and breath on her without touching her. On the back of the neck is a good place. Accidentally touch her with other part of your body than your hands. Skin to skin is best like rub your arm against her. Also do some mild verbal sexual innuendos. If she is the least bit attracted to you these things will drive her crazy. Then to close the deal do something where she is touching you. Get her to rub your back without your shirt on. Lay on the floor on your stomach. Tell her to sit across you if she starts sitting next to you. Then before she finishes roll over face up and grab her by the legs. Tell her that was awesome and then tell her to take her shirt off. If she complies or not pull her down to you and kiss her. You can take it from there.

SGent

 

[ajb1986ajb]

Thanks for the awesome suggestions SGent and excellent insights - I will keep the thread posted on how it goes!