Not gonna friendzone me, Miss Coworker

[HellAtlantic]

So I was hanging out with two female coworkers, both of whom I would love to ejaculate into. We get into the topic of dick pics (I have sent one of them, we'll call S, several dick pics over the last yr). S has a healthy sexual and fun personality. Love it. The other one, we'll call N, is older than me, always refused to see my dick pic and always said not to send to her. S takes out her phone and pulls up my dick pic (the fact that she saved it turned me on), and tried to get N to look at it but N kept looking away and shaking her head and giggling.

She then makes a comment I didn't like:

N: I would be embarrassed to see you naked. If you were to strip naked I'd look away, we're kinda close and it'd be like seeing my brothers naked. Just weird.

S: but he's not your brother.

Now a girl can tell me straight up "I'm not attracted to you" or "you're a good looking guy but you're just not my type, you're tall, bald with muscles and I like short rocker types" or "I can see how other girls would find you good looking but you just don't do it for me", anything like that. But do not ever tell me something along the lines of "you're like a brother and it'd be weird to see you naked." That will get me mad. That means somewhere along the way you mistook my deep diving you and having heart to heart talks as something a friend was doing instead of a guy trying to make a connection with you. I'm married so in order to stay away from "sleezy" or "cheating douchebag" who's in it just for sex I tend to overdo the deep diving to humanize me and make the other girl feel easier to relate to me. But she apparently mistook everything. Or she auto rejected after my not making moves.

Whatever the case I repeated my self to her something I've told her often.

Me: I'm not a mannequin. I have a cock between my legs. There isn't a girl in this bar who would look away if I took my clothes off.

S: I would definitely look at him if he took his clothes off. (She's married btw but it's on the rocks).

Me: that's why I've sent S several dick pics because she has a more sexual personality than you and is more open and comfortable with this kind of stuff.

N: I wouldn't have a problem looking at your dick pic if you made it an artsy kind of pic. (I don't know what that means).

So I get home at 1am. I was still a little ticked off because she joined me and S at the bar just as I was starting escalation steps with S because S said I'm her type and a ton of other compliments and was giving me doe eyes and we were close into each other's personal space. When N arrived she even said "oh was I interrupting something here? I can leave...". So someone who thinks of me as her brother or would be embarrassed to see me naked ruined a likely hookup. At that point it was 3 of us so isolating was off the table without rudely leaving her alone. So as I was in bed I googled famous art paintings and I made a collage of 4 pics, 3 of them were the art paintings and the 4th was my dick pic and I sent it to N with the text "you said you'd look at my dick pic of I made it look artsy". That was 1am Saturday morning and I've got no reply since (as expected).

I did this to eliminate any possibility of a friendzone. Not to hook up with her (although I won't refuse) but as a parting act. Either you accept me as an attractive sexual man or you don't but either way I'm not a mannequin with no cock. We don't have to be friends, we don't make each other's lives any better (although I probably make hers a bit better cuz she gets male attention from me and thus validation). I've subtlely have avoided eye contact and talking with her today (I've avoided interacting with her as I used to for a while now so it's nothing out of the ordinary for us to not interact cuz it's been this way for months now). But I'm glad I did it. Nothing says "fuck your friendzone" than a good old fashioned dick pic.

If she ever mentions something to me I will say only the following:

Me: you have 2 options really. 1) if it makes you feel weird then delete the pic. 2) keep the pic and use it when you're touching yourself at nite and thinking about me.

Say it to yourselves, boys, and say it to whichever girl is trying to keep you as an orbiter: "I'm not a mannequin - I'm a man and I have a cock between my legs." They'll either accept this new frame or they won't but at least you'll be the one dictating the interaction, on *your* terms.

 

[Aquila]

Sounds like it's an ego issue on your part.

Relax, there are many women out there who don't find you attractive, or even if they find you attractive, out of various reasons, will not get sexual with you. Your goal as a seducer is to screen out those who don't want you, and find the ones that like you.

The fact that you care so much about what she thinks already puts yourself at a much "lower value" than her, and if I were to make a guess I'd say it's reflected in your interaction with her. A massive attraction killer, and to be blunt, I wouldn't be surprised if she lost attraction because of the way you act.

 

[HellAtlantic]

Thank you for your input! I can see your point.

That was an outcome independent move. I'm married, a girl losing attraction for me due to an action or inaction on my part isn't my concern. That kind of stuff only comes into play for single guys trying not to lose a potential lay. Her losing attraction for me is an acceptable result for me. It's more a matter of calling her out for not being able to acknowledge there is a me who was emphatic with her during deep convos and there's also a me who is a good looking man with a cock, however it's not an either-or scenario. I'm both ppl and she has to accept the total me and not just the part that gave her attention and was a good conversationalist. If she can't accept then no worries, we don't need to interact outside of work. Her comments didn't jive with what the majority of girls think of me and no girl certainly thinks of me in a brotherly sort of way.

Also when I responded to her I internalized my displeasure with her comment and came at her in a rather "Awwww that's cute" sort of dismissive way. But internally it bothered me more than I let on.

Keep in mind this is a social circle so yeah, their opinions of me mean a little more to me than a random female. Especially when their opinions are wrong or illogical. But you make some interesting points. Thanks Aquila.