- Joined
- Dec 30, 2019
- Messages
- 233
Cold approach
Approached this Taiwanese girl, with a very low energy opener recommended to me by my new daygamer friend. And was being really feminine with her
Did the sort of 2 minute number close, where by I said I gotta go, I want to see u again She said take her telegram, I pass her my phone and ask her to teach me to use Telegram. She takes my phone while I have old-fashioned earphones plugged in so it's an excuse to
stand really close to her
And I just type in "hello" in front of her face and text her there and then. She's really flustered and we don't even talk about anything. No deep diving. Maximum time. 4 minutes. I vibe with her emotions flusteredness and shyness using decent eye-contact. She says U can take my telegram she may not text back I said ok then don't text me back haha
Messaging
The Date (2 weeks after I approached her)
The girl
I've never even seen her face but her body is great. We went on a 2-hour date without even taking our masks off because we never really got to a private space. Though writing this now it seems like a good kind of comliance
to ask for. She appeared on the date in a very bright red top with short jeans-material shorts and rainbow colored sneakers
She's 19 turning 20. She's from Taiwan and she's a student studying in a university in my city. She arrived sometime early this year and just after she arrived in my city the lockdown happened and she said she was quite lonely.
Logistics
Location (It's always the same): A cluster of three vertical air-conditioned malls that are connected to each other on the ground floor, wide and busy underground pathways, and link bridges on the upper floors. There are rooftops, quiet coffee shops, garages located across these 3 malls Seduction location: One of these 3 malls is quieter than the rest. I park my car in a very secluded parking lot in the carpark that is located at the top of this quieter mall
My date-and-pull process is: Move her around as much as possible throughout the date and try to build compliance but don't wait too long to pull. Usually there aren't many interesting places to take my dates on in the mall above which I've parked my car so the pull usually involves bringing her from a different mall into the one above which I've parked my car.
The rest of this paragraph still describes a public space: Then we'll walk to a lift lobby that can be accessed from any floor of that mall. Take the lift up to the carpark. Make quite a quiet walk to my car. I.e. past many empty parking lots because I've picked the one right at the corner of the building's architecture. I'll turn on my engine. And get her to sit in the back with me
The car itself: I've got sunshades and ways of preventing people from seeing into my car more or less 90% so the only giveaway would be some form of springing up and down of the car on its wheels which is not a problem given the parking lot is very secluded.
About me (the summary of dates I've gone on so far)
I am a virgin. But I believe in my above process because I've actually literally gotten a girl into the backseat of my car as stated above before. I've done that once so far though I failed
in the escalation during that attempt (there was actually an escalation window that I missed so it's not that she cluelessly got into my car)
At the time of my posting of this field report, it has been 4 months since I started going out regularly to do cold approach. I've never gone out to do night game thus far since that 4 month start mark.
Mainly because nightclubs and bars are still closed/safe-distancing. So far it has purely been daygame for me
This is my 4th date (counting from the 1st time when I had the above logistics). The time I successfully pulled was my 2nd date. I went on a 3rd date following that in which I tried to pull and the girl just kept saying no
I'm trying to get better at building comfort, conversation in general, and dealing with objections
The background about her that I managed to find out through what she said
She went to a strict Buddhist boarding school wear all the girls' hair could only be a few centimeters below their ears and they could only return home during summer and winter. Boys and girls were not allowed to mix this was all the way up till she finished high school so she didn't have a lot of experience meeting guys during high school.
The reason that she went to such a high school was that her parents are part of some Buddhist group that has very strong beliefs or something
Geographical information about her:
She spent all her high school years up til the end of high school in Taiwan and she studied in Chinese
She then spent 6 months on Prince Edward Island in East Canada learning English.
She probably returned to Taiwan and then came to my city which is in a different part of Asia to study.
The sexual history that she mentioned to me:
(I asked about this because when we got to the carpark her objection to coming to my car was so firm and her tone of voice was as though she instantly knew that I would try to have sex with her there. The message that her tone of voice sent me was A BIG: "I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU")
She said the first guy she slept with was her boyfriend who she knew from high school but only got to communicate with after she graduated from high school
Then the crazier thing she told me was that after she got to my city and was lonely from lockdown she used OkCupid to me this guy at his place during lockdown and she had what she described to me as "a one night stand" where she doesn't even know the guy's name even though she asked the guy what his name was 4 different times and the dude just deflected her question all 4 times. She told me she fell in love with this guy who she described to me as the wrong guy to fall in love with
So the thing about this is when she mentioned this to me, I was just highly uncomfortable with what I just heard, not with any regard to how I view seduction, but when she told me that story I thought that was some really cold behaviour from the guy because it sounds like he's just trying to use her for sex without even having any form of connection with the girl.
None of this stuff seemed like a lie when we were sitting and chatting on the grass patch at the rooftop of the mall because she seemed quite insecure when talking about her sexual history that she was plucking at the grass consistently whilst telling me
She never mentioned very much about having friends in my city which makes sense because she got here just before the lockdown and there wasn't really time to make that many friends
Her behaviour during the date in general
She was just refusing to comply with a lot of things. And just not ok with me just taking her around the mall and walking around, but then again it does seem fair that I didn't really know her very well, so I didn't know how to build comfort with her
She was refusing touch a lot at first. But after some baby steps and some forms of venue bouncing, I got some quite small touch going.
I venue bounced her quite a bit and that made her eventually open up about herself and her sexual history though I did not reward her investment, stupid me, I'm still figuring this whole process out
Venue bouncing
We meet at the top floor of one of the three malls where there is a food hall. We use one of the link bridges to walk over to the other mall and then we take the elevator to the first floor. Then we walk and hang out in the clothes shop.
She keeps telling me when we're in the clothes shop that it's so wierd that we are hanging out and walking around in the clothes shop and keeps asking me what's my plan for this date. It feels like she just wants to sit down and eat dinner
with me.
I genuinely do not know whether that's a good idea though it seems to me that sitting down and having restaurant dinner is a bad idea because I will not be able to maintain a leader of the interaction frame and I will not be able to move her around and get different forms of compliance
So at the clothes shop I do some kind of compliance test and it doesn't go very well. But I haven't got a read on this girl and she's dressed really sexually so I just go for the pull ask and this was a mistake. I could not tell that she was actually quite uncomfortable with me but that's fine
What I said to her was let's go up to my "car" and she said yes. But she actually misunderstood me to by thinking that I said we should go to a "bar" upstairs.
So we've exited the clothes shop at this stage and the only thing left to do is cross over using the link bridge into the mall above which my car is parked and we do exactly that. We get to the lift lobby, take the lift to the carpark and then get out of the lift
Then she realises that there's no bar around and it's a carpark. Then she tells me "I'm not going to ur car". So I just say to her well yea that's not what the plan was but just sit with me in my car. So I persisted one time, and I got the same firm no back perhaps a "no" that was even firmer
I say to her it's ok and I manage to remain unfazed despite the hard "no"s so that's a good improvement from my previous date
I tell her we're just going to walk around in the mall and she says that's boring and then I just shrug it off because we have to take the lift back down to the mall anyways so she just follows
We take the lift back down and we walk to this link bridge which positioned directly over the busiest road in my city where there are cars whizzing under us
I take her to a cheap and quiet coffee shop on the 5th floor of the mall and she takes one look at the place and says she doesn't want to sit down there so that's a failed compliance test
I then say we're going to the roof of one of the other malls so I take her not to the roof but to a balcony on the 7th floor of that mall (the roof is on the 11th)
We get to the balcony and I manage to get on a really strong conversational thread with her about her terrible high school experience.
I bounce her again to the roof and then we just sit down and chill on a grass patch and talk and she opens up about her sexual history and I suppose the glaring objection then comes out.
After she opened up to me, I fail to reward the investment that she made in opening up to me and I uncalibratedly ask her again to come with me to my car. And I get the same response as before.
She gets up from the grass patch and I want to move her again but now I really don't know where to take her to (because I no longer have a plan) (so this is something to take note of)
I just tell her that I want to move somewhere else because she's getting too comfortable there which is a mistake and I'm just not really sure what to do at this stage
I walk with her back down to the 4th floor and then we split apart (she said she's going to settle her dinner arrangements on her own because I told her I don't want to spend money(to avoid sitting down and eating with her)). The feeling I got at the end of the date was that she saw me in exactly the same way as the other guy who just wanted to use her for sex
The major failures/successes that occurred during the date
1. So the first fk up is that I have to take responsibility for the fact that I didn't communicate to her clearly that I was bringing her up to my car. Her English is not the best so that's something I going to take note of on future dates.
2. I failed to reward investment. Now this is something that I have yet to deliberately focus my mind to doing and so I suppose I should start doing that soon.
3. A major failure on my part towards not even trying to reframe the objection. I did not even try to reframe it. I will attempt to do this the next time.
There's a lot of more lessons that I can learn from this date but I'm not going to spend the additional time to write or think about it because I have enough things to work on already: Comfort, rewarding investment, date flexibility, attempting to reframe an objection
How I think I should improve and how I am going to implement my improvement aims
1. Having date flexibility. I've noticed in myself a pattern that when I go for the pull. I always feel that it's quite do or die. In my mind, it's like, I should really go for it now, if it doesn't happen now, all is lost. Which leads me to say things to girls like "let's just sit there because there's nothing much else to do" and that is a bad thing to communicate about myself
2. Honestly, on this date and my 3rd date. It's quite clear that both of these girls were looking for boyfriends anyways. Honestly, I am starting to get more phone numbers from my cold approaching and if I went on dates with all the girls who wanted to meet me I wouldn't have the time to go on all those dates so I'm going to screen for girls who are not primarily looking for a boyfriend in me
Once again, I already have a lot of things to improve on so that's it for now
Questions for readers
1. Thank u to NewBeeWinner for responding to the field report of my 3rd date. I posted the report my 3rd date after I went on my this (my 4th) date so I wasn't applying that advice on this date
2. Would u say that this field report that I have written here is sufficiently clear and simple for it to be read?
3. What else would u like to see in my field reports?
Approached this Taiwanese girl, with a very low energy opener recommended to me by my new daygamer friend. And was being really feminine with her
Did the sort of 2 minute number close, where by I said I gotta go, I want to see u again She said take her telegram, I pass her my phone and ask her to teach me to use Telegram. She takes my phone while I have old-fashioned earphones plugged in so it's an excuse to
stand really close to her
And I just type in "hello" in front of her face and text her there and then. She's really flustered and we don't even talk about anything. No deep diving. Maximum time. 4 minutes. I vibe with her emotions flusteredness and shyness using decent eye-contact. She says U can take my telegram she may not text back I said ok then don't text me back haha
Messaging
Sat
1905 Me: Hello
2231 Her: Hi haha
Sun
1241 Me: Come to meet me at (place) next week... How's ur schedule?
Wed
1628 Her: Hi, sry...this week is a bit tight for me, I'm not able to
meet up.
2153 Me: Ok. Pick a time next week. Otherwise, we can stop wasting time.
Fri
1810 Her: Next Saturday?
Sat
0911 Me: What time on Sat?
1907 Her: You could pick the time, I'm free all day
2326 Me: Ok let u know tmr
So we arrange the date and then she starts asking me over text what my age is and joke and deflect a bit regarding my personal information saying that I'm 50 when I'm actually 22 and saying to her that I'm uneducated
I didn't catch the rest of the texting because at the time of the date I was quite bust so I didn't get to write this report until 5 days after the date by which she had already deleted me on Telegram along with
all of our texting messages
The Date (2 weeks after I approached her)
The girl
I've never even seen her face but her body is great. We went on a 2-hour date without even taking our masks off because we never really got to a private space. Though writing this now it seems like a good kind of comliance
to ask for. She appeared on the date in a very bright red top with short jeans-material shorts and rainbow colored sneakers
She's 19 turning 20. She's from Taiwan and she's a student studying in a university in my city. She arrived sometime early this year and just after she arrived in my city the lockdown happened and she said she was quite lonely.
Logistics
Location (It's always the same): A cluster of three vertical air-conditioned malls that are connected to each other on the ground floor, wide and busy underground pathways, and link bridges on the upper floors. There are rooftops, quiet coffee shops, garages located across these 3 malls Seduction location: One of these 3 malls is quieter than the rest. I park my car in a very secluded parking lot in the carpark that is located at the top of this quieter mall
My date-and-pull process is: Move her around as much as possible throughout the date and try to build compliance but don't wait too long to pull. Usually there aren't many interesting places to take my dates on in the mall above which I've parked my car so the pull usually involves bringing her from a different mall into the one above which I've parked my car.
The rest of this paragraph still describes a public space: Then we'll walk to a lift lobby that can be accessed from any floor of that mall. Take the lift up to the carpark. Make quite a quiet walk to my car. I.e. past many empty parking lots because I've picked the one right at the corner of the building's architecture. I'll turn on my engine. And get her to sit in the back with me
The car itself: I've got sunshades and ways of preventing people from seeing into my car more or less 90% so the only giveaway would be some form of springing up and down of the car on its wheels which is not a problem given the parking lot is very secluded.
About me (the summary of dates I've gone on so far)
I am a virgin. But I believe in my above process because I've actually literally gotten a girl into the backseat of my car as stated above before. I've done that once so far though I failed
in the escalation during that attempt (there was actually an escalation window that I missed so it's not that she cluelessly got into my car)
At the time of my posting of this field report, it has been 4 months since I started going out regularly to do cold approach. I've never gone out to do night game thus far since that 4 month start mark.
Mainly because nightclubs and bars are still closed/safe-distancing. So far it has purely been daygame for me
This is my 4th date (counting from the 1st time when I had the above logistics). The time I successfully pulled was my 2nd date. I went on a 3rd date following that in which I tried to pull and the girl just kept saying no
I'm trying to get better at building comfort, conversation in general, and dealing with objections
The background about her that I managed to find out through what she said
She went to a strict Buddhist boarding school wear all the girls' hair could only be a few centimeters below their ears and they could only return home during summer and winter. Boys and girls were not allowed to mix this was all the way up till she finished high school so she didn't have a lot of experience meeting guys during high school.
The reason that she went to such a high school was that her parents are part of some Buddhist group that has very strong beliefs or something
Geographical information about her:
She spent all her high school years up til the end of high school in Taiwan and she studied in Chinese
She then spent 6 months on Prince Edward Island in East Canada learning English.
She probably returned to Taiwan and then came to my city which is in a different part of Asia to study.
The sexual history that she mentioned to me:
(I asked about this because when we got to the carpark her objection to coming to my car was so firm and her tone of voice was as though she instantly knew that I would try to have sex with her there. The message that her tone of voice sent me was A BIG: "I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU")
She said the first guy she slept with was her boyfriend who she knew from high school but only got to communicate with after she graduated from high school
Then the crazier thing she told me was that after she got to my city and was lonely from lockdown she used OkCupid to me this guy at his place during lockdown and she had what she described to me as "a one night stand" where she doesn't even know the guy's name even though she asked the guy what his name was 4 different times and the dude just deflected her question all 4 times. She told me she fell in love with this guy who she described to me as the wrong guy to fall in love with
So the thing about this is when she mentioned this to me, I was just highly uncomfortable with what I just heard, not with any regard to how I view seduction, but when she told me that story I thought that was some really cold behaviour from the guy because it sounds like he's just trying to use her for sex without even having any form of connection with the girl.
None of this stuff seemed like a lie when we were sitting and chatting on the grass patch at the rooftop of the mall because she seemed quite insecure when talking about her sexual history that she was plucking at the grass consistently whilst telling me
She never mentioned very much about having friends in my city which makes sense because she got here just before the lockdown and there wasn't really time to make that many friends
Her behaviour during the date in general
She was just refusing to comply with a lot of things. And just not ok with me just taking her around the mall and walking around, but then again it does seem fair that I didn't really know her very well, so I didn't know how to build comfort with her
She was refusing touch a lot at first. But after some baby steps and some forms of venue bouncing, I got some quite small touch going.
I venue bounced her quite a bit and that made her eventually open up about herself and her sexual history though I did not reward her investment, stupid me, I'm still figuring this whole process out
Venue bouncing
We meet at the top floor of one of the three malls where there is a food hall. We use one of the link bridges to walk over to the other mall and then we take the elevator to the first floor. Then we walk and hang out in the clothes shop.
She keeps telling me when we're in the clothes shop that it's so wierd that we are hanging out and walking around in the clothes shop and keeps asking me what's my plan for this date. It feels like she just wants to sit down and eat dinner
with me.
I genuinely do not know whether that's a good idea though it seems to me that sitting down and having restaurant dinner is a bad idea because I will not be able to maintain a leader of the interaction frame and I will not be able to move her around and get different forms of compliance
So at the clothes shop I do some kind of compliance test and it doesn't go very well. But I haven't got a read on this girl and she's dressed really sexually so I just go for the pull ask and this was a mistake. I could not tell that she was actually quite uncomfortable with me but that's fine
What I said to her was let's go up to my "car" and she said yes. But she actually misunderstood me to by thinking that I said we should go to a "bar" upstairs.
So we've exited the clothes shop at this stage and the only thing left to do is cross over using the link bridge into the mall above which my car is parked and we do exactly that. We get to the lift lobby, take the lift to the carpark and then get out of the lift
Then she realises that there's no bar around and it's a carpark. Then she tells me "I'm not going to ur car". So I just say to her well yea that's not what the plan was but just sit with me in my car. So I persisted one time, and I got the same firm no back perhaps a "no" that was even firmer
I say to her it's ok and I manage to remain unfazed despite the hard "no"s so that's a good improvement from my previous date
I tell her we're just going to walk around in the mall and she says that's boring and then I just shrug it off because we have to take the lift back down to the mall anyways so she just follows
We take the lift back down and we walk to this link bridge which positioned directly over the busiest road in my city where there are cars whizzing under us
I take her to a cheap and quiet coffee shop on the 5th floor of the mall and she takes one look at the place and says she doesn't want to sit down there so that's a failed compliance test
I then say we're going to the roof of one of the other malls so I take her not to the roof but to a balcony on the 7th floor of that mall (the roof is on the 11th)
We get to the balcony and I manage to get on a really strong conversational thread with her about her terrible high school experience.
I bounce her again to the roof and then we just sit down and chill on a grass patch and talk and she opens up about her sexual history and I suppose the glaring objection then comes out.
After she opened up to me, I fail to reward the investment that she made in opening up to me and I uncalibratedly ask her again to come with me to my car. And I get the same response as before.
She gets up from the grass patch and I want to move her again but now I really don't know where to take her to (because I no longer have a plan) (so this is something to take note of)
I just tell her that I want to move somewhere else because she's getting too comfortable there which is a mistake and I'm just not really sure what to do at this stage
I walk with her back down to the 4th floor and then we split apart (she said she's going to settle her dinner arrangements on her own because I told her I don't want to spend money(to avoid sitting down and eating with her)). The feeling I got at the end of the date was that she saw me in exactly the same way as the other guy who just wanted to use her for sex
The major failures/successes that occurred during the date
1. So the first fk up is that I have to take responsibility for the fact that I didn't communicate to her clearly that I was bringing her up to my car. Her English is not the best so that's something I going to take note of on future dates.
2. I failed to reward investment. Now this is something that I have yet to deliberately focus my mind to doing and so I suppose I should start doing that soon.
3. A major failure on my part towards not even trying to reframe the objection. I did not even try to reframe it. I will attempt to do this the next time.
There's a lot of more lessons that I can learn from this date but I'm not going to spend the additional time to write or think about it because I have enough things to work on already: Comfort, rewarding investment, date flexibility, attempting to reframe an objection
How I think I should improve and how I am going to implement my improvement aims
1. Having date flexibility. I've noticed in myself a pattern that when I go for the pull. I always feel that it's quite do or die. In my mind, it's like, I should really go for it now, if it doesn't happen now, all is lost. Which leads me to say things to girls like "let's just sit there because there's nothing much else to do" and that is a bad thing to communicate about myself
2. Honestly, on this date and my 3rd date. It's quite clear that both of these girls were looking for boyfriends anyways. Honestly, I am starting to get more phone numbers from my cold approaching and if I went on dates with all the girls who wanted to meet me I wouldn't have the time to go on all those dates so I'm going to screen for girls who are not primarily looking for a boyfriend in me
Once again, I already have a lot of things to improve on so that's it for now
Questions for readers
1. Thank u to NewBeeWinner for responding to the field report of my 3rd date. I posted the report my 3rd date after I went on my this (my 4th) date so I wasn't applying that advice on this date
2. Would u say that this field report that I have written here is sufficiently clear and simple for it to be read?
3. What else would u like to see in my field reports?
