- Joined
- Dec 30, 2019
- Messages
- 233
Cold approach and 5 min insta-date
I side stop with very slow arm tap from the side and deliver one of the most genuine "You lok great" openers I've given since the 500 approaches I've accumulated over the past 3 months.
I find out she's 18 and this is the first time she's been approached. I managed to get very early compliance because initially we're standing in the middle of a bustling bustling intersection of pathways and I confidently and successfully tell her to move into a corner
We were initially walking in opposite directions, so I ask her why she's on this busy street and she says she lives far away and she was meeting friends so she wanted to take a walk before she went home
I was going in the opposite direction which happens to be where my dinner place is. I think 5 min insta-date. I initially wanted to walk with her in the direction she was going but I realised that I wouldnt know what to do in that case.
So I did the right thing and pushed for her to come in my direction. This part's funny:
So I chat with her a bit more about how depending on how long someone's lived they'll have experienced more things, I tell her my age and she tells me her age and she's 18 while I'm 21/22
So this perhaps makes her more comfortable and I start walking slowly and gesture for her to come and she starts walking slowly, and she asks where we're going and I just explain exactly where, just a 2 minute walk and she's trembling and she starts asking me whether I do this regularly to which I actually give a crap answer and say "Enough."
So we talk a abit about attraction, then the schools we're from, then my deep diving fails again, but we do have a warm conversation. And she's really attracted to me. I say she looks really good and sounds very foreign. And she says the exact same thing to me. Like I have not received such an attracted-to-me compliment before
Close
Me: I'm keen to go and eat dinner. I AM ALSO KEEN to see you again another day
.
I take her phone number and realise I forgot to delete the call logs of 2 other girls I picked up and I spent some time fiddling with my phone to delete my history and ignoring her and she looked slightly annoyed because of that. I wouldn't expect anything else.
But so I got the date and she was still really excited when she walked off so yea.
Date: Meet-up the next week
The girl
On this date, she was looking good with a black skirt that stretched down to slightly below halwfay to her knee and a not so tightly fitting and baggy shirt. She has a great body. Cream coloured baggy shity. Black handbag that slings down from her shoulder to her waist level.
She's of Sikh religion and she's Indian. In my country, Indian is a minority group but there is a sizable community, about 5-15% of the population is Indian The thing is that her being Sikh distinguishes her from most of the Indians because Indian who are of Sikh faith are a much smaller subset of Indians in my country. Closer to 1-2% of the people in my country maybe less.
For the guys who want to know where on the out of 10 scale, she has slightly strange looking lips aside from everything else. I don't like to use this scale but if not for her lips she's 9.5. Lips make her 8.5-9. Really good body. b/c cup breasts. I don't really even give a shit about breasts that much, this is for the sake of readers
Logistics
Location (It's always the same): A cluster of three vertical air-conditioned malls that are connected to each other on the ground floor, wide and busy underground pathways, and link bridges on the upper floors. There are rooftops, quiet coffee shops, garages located across these 3 malls
Seduction location: One of these 3 malls is quieter than the rest. I park my car in a very secluded parking lot in the carpark that is located at the top of this quieter mall
My date-and-pull process is: Move her around as much as possible throughout the date and try to build compliance but don't wait too long to pull. Usually there aren't many interesting places to take my dates on in the mall above which I've parked my car so the pull usually involves bringing her from a different mall into the one above which I've parked my car.
The rest of this paragraph still describes a public space: Then we'll walk to a lift lobby that can be accessed from any floor of that mall. Take the lift up to the carpark. Make quite a quiet walk to my car. I.e. past many empty parking lots because I've picked the one right at the corner of the building's architecture. I'll turn on my engine. And get her to sit in the back with me
The car itself: I've got sunshades and ways of preventing people from seeing into my car more or less 90% so the only giveaway would be some form of springing up and down of the car on its wheels which is not a problem given the parking lot is very secluded.
About me (the summary of dates I've gone on so far)
I am a virgin. But I believe in my above process because I've actually literally gotten a girl into the backseat of my car as stated above before. I've done that once so far though I failed in the escalation during that attempt (there was actually an escalation window that I missed so it's not that she cluelessly got into my car)
This is my 3rd date (counting from the 1st time when I had the above logistics). The time I successfully pulled was my 2nd date.
The background about her that I managed to find out through what she said
Did not manage to decipher much about her dating history. She told me at the end that her Mom never allowed her to go to any of her friend's houses to have sleepovers. On the other hand, she loves to gossip about taboo/public sex and sex scandals in her school because she was gossiping about that with me
Other than this there really wasn't anything concrete she told me other than her fears of trusting guys and not wanting to go to private places with them.
Her behaviour during the date in general
Refusing to comply and invest and tell me the stuff about herself that is close to her heart. She did however start telling me more when I hinted that I was going to call off the date. She tried at one point during the date to treat me like a boyfriend who treats her like a princess.
It was only after I started really vibing with her when we were about to split apart at the train station that she really started telling me more of her fears and the stuff that she really cared about
Venue bouncing on the date
Met at ground floor of one of the malls. Walked into a multi-story clothes shop. Hung out there and walked around in the shop for 20mins.
Walked to a very quite coffee shop in a quiet part but upper level of the same mall. Sat there for 40 mins. And I pull the first time and it fks up.
She seemed to be enjoying herself, I told her we're going to leave the coffee shop
I ask to pull her the second time just saying "just come with me" and I successfully bring her over to the mall above which I parked my car and to the lift lobby (still a completely
public space) from which we would get into the lift and the lift would bring us up.
She asks me where we are going, and I fk up this part. I said quite firmly, we are going to sit in car and listen to some music, if u r not comfortable with that (because she really
did seem quite uncomfortable with not knowing where I was bringing her even at the early stage of being at the lift lobby), there's not much we can do we should just go to the train station
(signalling end of date) (Not an excuse for fking up the pull but I believe it will go better in the future)
She says "I think we'll just go to the train station"
So on the way to the train station I ask her a 4th time
The 5th and 6th time I ask her to come to my car with me was at the entrance to the train station
I tell her I'm only just starting to enjoy talking to her, I walk into the train station with her
At the point where we're about to split apart and we actually already agree to say good bye 4ever, I can see in her eyes that she's free and still wants to spend time with me so we get back into
another very warm conversation and then I ask her the 7th time to come to my car
The real objection then comes out which I am stumped by and do not know how to deal with. See below for more details on her real objection.
The major failures/successes that occurred during the date
I persisted in the ask 7 times. She was the first person who ever declined a pull offer from me and I failed to hide my disappointment. Yet I still persisted 6 more times.
On the 2nd-4th times I asked to pull her, it was very uncalibrated because I wasn't applying the concepts of compliance, even on the first pull I didn't not apply the concepts of compliance
On the 5th and 6th times I asked her (I managed to be a lot calmer and the conversation between us was getting much warmer than it had been before), so the impact of my ask was greater and so she started coming up with excuses to qualify herself about why she couldn't go to my car (even though I offered to send her to wherever she needed to go)
Excuses
It's ok I don't want to trouble u. I can take the train back myself
She needed to meet her Mum at a place in an hour's time that was 30mins away by subway
On the 7th time I ask her, the real objection comes out:
She really sincerely tells me that she hopes I'm not offended but that she doesn't trust people to the degree of agreeing to sit in their car, she tells me she had a bad experience but she does not elaborate on what the bad experience is, immedaitely after she tells me that she had a bad experience she tells me this really long story about this comic she read and believes in about this really 2-faced fictional guy who is capable of being really nice, but he brings girls back to his place, seduces them, and then takes them into his basement and mutilates them.
So at this stage, to pull her again would destroy all plausible deniability, forcing the objection it seemed would have come off as defensive and hard push didn't seem like it was going to
work so I gave up.
I had not understood how the compliance pull works yet so I did not test these concepts out yet. As a result, this date may not be a true evaluation of where my limits are.
I'm still really working on my thread amplification and conversation so, once again, not a true evaluation of where my limits are
How I think I should improve and how I am going to implement my improvement aims
I understand that since she was gossiping so much about sex with me that was a major opportunity for me to sexualise the conversation and build arousal. But what I will do for now is stick to learning compliance pulling and working on my basic conversation. And getting laid, and racking up some wins first, before I start thinking about sexualised conversation.
As for dealing with her real objection, I genuinely am not sure how I'm going to deal with it. For now, I am just going to keep going on dates until I get girls who don't have such strong objections, and lose my V card, rack up some wins first.
Questions for readers
Would u say that this field report that I have written here is sufficiently clear and simple for it to be read?
I looking for advice on how to improve my field report writing, if any
What else would u like to see in my field reports?
As for such an objection, is the only way to deal with such a strong objection to reframe and deal with the objection? Is there any way to avoid the objection? In which case, the only way I can think of to deal with such an objection is through pacing and leading (the Neuro-Linguistic programming technique mentioned in Dan Adebayo's article), does that sound like the correct response that should be applied to such an objection?
Should I remove the documentation of the cold approach? It somehow seems to make the whole field report bulkier and harder to swallow
I side stop with very slow arm tap from the side and deliver one of the most genuine "You lok great" openers I've given since the 500 approaches I've accumulated over the past 3 months.
I find out she's 18 and this is the first time she's been approached. I managed to get very early compliance because initially we're standing in the middle of a bustling bustling intersection of pathways and I confidently and successfully tell her to move into a corner
We were initially walking in opposite directions, so I ask her why she's on this busy street and she says she lives far away and she was meeting friends so she wanted to take a walk before she went home
I was going in the opposite direction which happens to be where my dinner place is. I think 5 min insta-date. I initially wanted to walk with her in the direction she was going but I realised that I wouldnt know what to do in that case.
So I did the right thing and pushed for her to come in my direction. This part's funny:
Me: Come with walk with me to my dinner place
Her: (Really unsure and flustered but excited and attracted to me) umm, why? for what?
Me: (impressed that I had the guts to be direct about it) It's a date! (I start walking
slowly in my direction)
Her: Wwwhhhaaatttt!??!?!??!? (Hysterically) (She's pretty inexperienced oh well)
Her: I've never gone on a date before like this... And you're not even going to ask?!?!
(As in ask for her permission lol... Relax my dear. 2 years ago, I would
(Since I didn't ask her and just started walking)
Me: She wants to start moving but I can tell she's not very comfortable so I turn back to our corner
Me: (Impressed that I managed to say this) THIS (referring to the fact that we have been talking for
a bit already) is a date
Her: (Says nothing and accepts the frame)
So I chat with her a bit more about how depending on how long someone's lived they'll have experienced more things, I tell her my age and she tells me her age and she's 18 while I'm 21/22
So this perhaps makes her more comfortable and I start walking slowly and gesture for her to come and she starts walking slowly, and she asks where we're going and I just explain exactly where, just a 2 minute walk and she's trembling and she starts asking me whether I do this regularly to which I actually give a crap answer and say "Enough."
So we talk a abit about attraction, then the schools we're from, then my deep diving fails again, but we do have a warm conversation. And she's really attracted to me. I say she looks really good and sounds very foreign. And she says the exact same thing to me. Like I have not received such an attracted-to-me compliment before
Close
Me: I'm keen to go and eat dinner. I AM ALSO KEEN to see you again another day
.I take her phone number and realise I forgot to delete the call logs of 2 other girls I picked up and I spent some time fiddling with my phone to delete my history and ignoring her and she looked slightly annoyed because of that. I wouldn't expect anything else.
But so I got the date and she was still really excited when she walked off so yea.
Date: Meet-up the next week
The girl
On this date, she was looking good with a black skirt that stretched down to slightly below halwfay to her knee and a not so tightly fitting and baggy shirt. She has a great body. Cream coloured baggy shity. Black handbag that slings down from her shoulder to her waist level.
She's of Sikh religion and she's Indian. In my country, Indian is a minority group but there is a sizable community, about 5-15% of the population is Indian The thing is that her being Sikh distinguishes her from most of the Indians because Indian who are of Sikh faith are a much smaller subset of Indians in my country. Closer to 1-2% of the people in my country maybe less.
For the guys who want to know where on the out of 10 scale, she has slightly strange looking lips aside from everything else. I don't like to use this scale but if not for her lips she's 9.5. Lips make her 8.5-9. Really good body. b/c cup breasts. I don't really even give a shit about breasts that much, this is for the sake of readers
Logistics
Location (It's always the same): A cluster of three vertical air-conditioned malls that are connected to each other on the ground floor, wide and busy underground pathways, and link bridges on the upper floors. There are rooftops, quiet coffee shops, garages located across these 3 malls
Seduction location: One of these 3 malls is quieter than the rest. I park my car in a very secluded parking lot in the carpark that is located at the top of this quieter mall
My date-and-pull process is: Move her around as much as possible throughout the date and try to build compliance but don't wait too long to pull. Usually there aren't many interesting places to take my dates on in the mall above which I've parked my car so the pull usually involves bringing her from a different mall into the one above which I've parked my car.
The rest of this paragraph still describes a public space: Then we'll walk to a lift lobby that can be accessed from any floor of that mall. Take the lift up to the carpark. Make quite a quiet walk to my car. I.e. past many empty parking lots because I've picked the one right at the corner of the building's architecture. I'll turn on my engine. And get her to sit in the back with me
The car itself: I've got sunshades and ways of preventing people from seeing into my car more or less 90% so the only giveaway would be some form of springing up and down of the car on its wheels which is not a problem given the parking lot is very secluded.
About me (the summary of dates I've gone on so far)
I am a virgin. But I believe in my above process because I've actually literally gotten a girl into the backseat of my car as stated above before. I've done that once so far though I failed in the escalation during that attempt (there was actually an escalation window that I missed so it's not that she cluelessly got into my car)
This is my 3rd date (counting from the 1st time when I had the above logistics). The time I successfully pulled was my 2nd date.
The background about her that I managed to find out through what she said
Did not manage to decipher much about her dating history. She told me at the end that her Mom never allowed her to go to any of her friend's houses to have sleepovers. On the other hand, she loves to gossip about taboo/public sex and sex scandals in her school because she was gossiping about that with me
Other than this there really wasn't anything concrete she told me other than her fears of trusting guys and not wanting to go to private places with them.
Her behaviour during the date in general
Refusing to comply and invest and tell me the stuff about herself that is close to her heart. She did however start telling me more when I hinted that I was going to call off the date. She tried at one point during the date to treat me like a boyfriend who treats her like a princess.
It was only after I started really vibing with her when we were about to split apart at the train station that she really started telling me more of her fears and the stuff that she really cared about
Venue bouncing on the date
Met at ground floor of one of the malls. Walked into a multi-story clothes shop. Hung out there and walked around in the shop for 20mins.
Walked to a very quite coffee shop in a quiet part but upper level of the same mall. Sat there for 40 mins. And I pull the first time and it fks up.
She seemed to be enjoying herself, I told her we're going to leave the coffee shop
I ask to pull her the second time just saying "just come with me" and I successfully bring her over to the mall above which I parked my car and to the lift lobby (still a completely
public space) from which we would get into the lift and the lift would bring us up.
She asks me where we are going, and I fk up this part. I said quite firmly, we are going to sit in car and listen to some music, if u r not comfortable with that (because she really
did seem quite uncomfortable with not knowing where I was bringing her even at the early stage of being at the lift lobby), there's not much we can do we should just go to the train station
(signalling end of date) (Not an excuse for fking up the pull but I believe it will go better in the future)
She says "I think we'll just go to the train station"
So on the way to the train station I ask her a 4th time
The 5th and 6th time I ask her to come to my car with me was at the entrance to the train station
I tell her I'm only just starting to enjoy talking to her, I walk into the train station with her
At the point where we're about to split apart and we actually already agree to say good bye 4ever, I can see in her eyes that she's free and still wants to spend time with me so we get back into
another very warm conversation and then I ask her the 7th time to come to my car
The real objection then comes out which I am stumped by and do not know how to deal with. See below for more details on her real objection.
The major failures/successes that occurred during the date
I persisted in the ask 7 times. She was the first person who ever declined a pull offer from me and I failed to hide my disappointment. Yet I still persisted 6 more times.
On the 2nd-4th times I asked to pull her, it was very uncalibrated because I wasn't applying the concepts of compliance, even on the first pull I didn't not apply the concepts of compliance
On the 5th and 6th times I asked her (I managed to be a lot calmer and the conversation between us was getting much warmer than it had been before), so the impact of my ask was greater and so she started coming up with excuses to qualify herself about why she couldn't go to my car (even though I offered to send her to wherever she needed to go)
Excuses
It's ok I don't want to trouble u. I can take the train back myself
She needed to meet her Mum at a place in an hour's time that was 30mins away by subway
On the 7th time I ask her, the real objection comes out:
She really sincerely tells me that she hopes I'm not offended but that she doesn't trust people to the degree of agreeing to sit in their car, she tells me she had a bad experience but she does not elaborate on what the bad experience is, immedaitely after she tells me that she had a bad experience she tells me this really long story about this comic she read and believes in about this really 2-faced fictional guy who is capable of being really nice, but he brings girls back to his place, seduces them, and then takes them into his basement and mutilates them.
So at this stage, to pull her again would destroy all plausible deniability, forcing the objection it seemed would have come off as defensive and hard push didn't seem like it was going to
work so I gave up.
I had not understood how the compliance pull works yet so I did not test these concepts out yet. As a result, this date may not be a true evaluation of where my limits are.
I'm still really working on my thread amplification and conversation so, once again, not a true evaluation of where my limits are
How I think I should improve and how I am going to implement my improvement aims
I understand that since she was gossiping so much about sex with me that was a major opportunity for me to sexualise the conversation and build arousal. But what I will do for now is stick to learning compliance pulling and working on my basic conversation. And getting laid, and racking up some wins first, before I start thinking about sexualised conversation.
As for dealing with her real objection, I genuinely am not sure how I'm going to deal with it. For now, I am just going to keep going on dates until I get girls who don't have such strong objections, and lose my V card, rack up some wins first.
Questions for readers
Would u say that this field report that I have written here is sufficiently clear and simple for it to be read?
I looking for advice on how to improve my field report writing, if any
What else would u like to see in my field reports?
As for such an objection, is the only way to deal with such a strong objection to reframe and deal with the objection? Is there any way to avoid the objection? In which case, the only way I can think of to deal with such an objection is through pacing and leading (the Neuro-Linguistic programming technique mentioned in Dan Adebayo's article), does that sound like the correct response that should be applied to such an objection?
Should I remove the documentation of the cold approach? It somehow seems to make the whole field report bulkier and harder to swallow
