Of body signs - part 2

[Adamantimus]

Okay, so I'm going to continue on the topic. Hmm.. Maybe I should've just continued this in the previous topic, but this is in such a different context, that I just decided to create a new thread.

Anyway, to the point. Or actually, I'm going to start with the backgrounds.

I was at a conference a few days ago. It's a conference which I now and then attend to, but at times there is this wonderful lady representing the different topics.

I would catch her sometimes looking at me, standing further away at the other side of the room as I was queuing for the coffee.

I admit, as she was doing her representations it was very easy for me to look at her in the eyes. Of course, she would look at all of the listeners, not just at me.


[the actual point] I recognized she would place her legs in a certain way. Her body wouldn't be squared towards me - after all, I wasn't at the center of the backwall where the audience was, being more to the side. She would square her body towards the center of the audience.

Many times during the representation she would place her right leg besides her left one, ending up in a x-like position (her left leg in | and right lex \, in front of the left one)

But the toes of her right leg, the leg which she had positioned in this certain way, would point straight towards me.

So her body would be squared a little bit away from me, her feet would be squared away from me, but the toes of her right leg would point straight towards me.


What does this signal? And what does signal this x-like position anyway, where a woman "throws" one of her legs to the other side of her other leg while standing, resulting in the x-position.


Just to add one more thing, the representer's around the same age as me.

 

[Flames]

I think you focusing on one thing way too much and that's not to put you off. I study peoples body language a hell of a lot and I'm very intuitive/empathic but I still get it wrong quite a lot, and that's not that I get the general idea wrong but you need to know the context.

For example a girl could walk in, give you a quick glance and be attracted to you but be terribly sick/hung over and she'll ignore/avoid contact with you. From your point of view she's not interested but from hers she doesn't want you to see her in a bad state. She may always consider herself 'a mess' or 'not worthy' and that maybe just because that's how she is, low self esteem.

Perspective is everything.

You can try to describe a situation as accurately as possible and still miss a simple and important detail.

There's a few good .Pdf around about body language. The good ones will explain that it's really not an exact science.

http://changingminds.org is a very good website which I used (and still refer to) occasionally.

 

[Adamantimus]

I think you focusing on one thing way too much and that's not to put you off. I study peoples body language a hell of a lot and I'm very intuitive/empathic but I still get it wrong quite a lot, and that's not that I get the general idea wrong but you need to know the context.

For example a girl could walk in, give you a quick glance and be attracted to you but be terribly sick/hung over and she'll ignore/avoid contact with you. From your point of view she's not interested but from hers she doesn't want you to see her in a bad state. She may always consider herself 'a mess' or 'not worthy' and that maybe just because that's how she is, low self esteem.

Perspective is everything.

You can try to describe a situation as accurately as possible and still miss a simple and important detail.

There's a few good .Pdf around about body language. The good ones will explain that it's really not an exact science.

http://changingminds.org is a very good website which I used (and still refer to) occasionally.

So what you're suggesting is that I was overanalyzing her - thinking that she's interested when she really wasn't?
Well it is a two edged sword.

She does have her role as the representer. That is the context which I was acknowledging. She has her role, and of course she can't go all flirting on me when she's doing her representation.
But when she was out of her role, she would look at me from afar. This of course doesn't prove that she was interested, but is a mere signal of it.

The legs crossing-thing was probably a subconscious signal of her tension when doing the representation. She would cross her legs in order to defend herself from the potential judgement.

As with the pointing, there is a mention about it at the website you referred to:

"A person who is interested in you may subtly point at you with a foot, knee, arm or head. It is effectively a signal that says 'I would like to go in this direction'."

But who knows, maybe her foot was just positioned in that way, thus reducing the imbalance of the body, as the crossed legs-position while standing is not the most balanced of positions.

But I am an over analyzer, I know. And knowing these implicit signals women could send is not going to lower it in any way =)
Still, I don't mind it.

 

[Flames]

Well no I don't mean your overanalysing as such. What I mean is you can't just look at a foot and say she's attracted to you.

Maybe your underanalyzing or even maybe your not actually conscious of analysing the whole picture correctly and focusing on that one thing because that's the part your most aware of. There's a lot more goes on outside our conscious awareness.

I think you maybe better off approaching the subject as a whole but leave it in the realms of casual study rather than relying on it, this comes from my experience of learning all about it and then discovering I didn't really have to.