Online Dating and Women being "Online" After You've Gone Out

[Paulie Walnuts]

Yes I know this is a silly question and I kind of already know the answer (it's not a big deal), but I wanted to get some GC input on it.

Had a fantastic date with a girl about my age last week on Thursday, went brilliant. My leading, deep dive and sexual framing were on point; and after a great interaction at the first bar I moved her to the second bar with zero resistance, made out with her on the way. Once we got to the second bar I just kept escalating, making out hard, lots of touching she basically starts telling me how bad she wants me right now but that her new rule "Is that she won't fuck guys on the first date anymore", obviously I know I got boyfriend zoned and that's ok, shit happens. Basically I brought that up because I thought it was funny and she said "Jesus I just can't slip one by you can I? With most guys they don't realize what I'm doing but with you... you're different ". Persisted hard to try and close but unfortunately didn't work, setup a day 2 for Tuesday. Tuesday rolls around and she flaked, not last minute or anything but says she's at the docs and has had a rough couple of days, says she still wants to see me though and asks if I'm available Friday. (Also before this there had been some somewhat sexual text messages about me being in her bed and how much better of an end to the night that would have been). I say I'm free (not playing games and just making it easy for her), so we're scheduled for tonight at the same bar we first met at and she says "It'll be our spot ".

Anyway just sent a confirmation text, but I logged back into POF and noticed she was online for the first time in a week. Obviously I know we've only been on one date so this doesn't matter at all, buuuuuut should I expect to even hear from her (I mean she did flake Tuesday)? What's your experience with girls that you see online again after a first date (even if it went really well, but you didn't have sex, so clearly not that well). Also I KNOW I'm also logged in again and messaging other girls so she's probably doing the same haha. In the past Pre-GC I'd have said something to her about it, BUT I know this sounds weird, creepy, needy, stalkerish and the like so I've pledged not to do such dumb shit like that anymore. I did view her though, hope that doesn't come off weird.

ALSO, I went on another date last night, really hot 5 foot tall girl that really has her life together at 19. Said she "Thought I was really fuckin cute, blew off an assignment to come meet me and had an amazing time on our date" (we just went to Dennys lol). Like at the end of the date after 2.5 hours she said "Let's go chat more outside, you're really cute and I'm really enjoying talking to you". Thing was everytime I made a move she said "It takes me a while to be ok with physical contact, I hate one night stands", we talked a bit about sex and I tried to sexual frame her and it kind of worked but she basically said she only has sex with boyfriends and guys she knows that are gonna stick around (I'm aware I probably got boyfriend zoned). We didn't even end the date with a kiss, but she said it went really well (teased her through a lot of it, good playful frame maintained).

Now... my mistake on there was probably asking her to text me if she wants to go out again, she said she'd be busy but she'd make sure to reply to me today if I texted her (but I didn't want to seem needy as that was a major complaint for her with online dating so far), so I just said "text me if you wanna go out again!"

I also noticed her "Online" this morning, am I thinking way too much about this? I mean shit haha I was online tryna message some new girls too, they just doing the same thing?

 

[Paulie Walnuts]

For the second date girl I was thinking if she didn't text me by Sunday I'd just say something like "Not putting you in charge of texting anymore Cassidy , you're sluffin"

Could def use advice for both though!

 

[Fuck This]

Most attractive girls on dating sites get messaged like crazy. I had one tell me she has to empty her message folder daily from all the dick pics, and "Hey, how's it goin'?" messages.

Just know these girls got options...Most are crap. Just make an impression.

 

[Lotus]

Trackrunner,

Had a fantastic date with a girl about my age last week on Thursday, went brilliant. My leading, deep dive and sexual framing were on point; and after a great interaction at the first bar I moved her to the second bar with zero resistance, made out with her on the way. Once we got to the second bar I just kept escalating, making out hard, lots of touching she basically starts telling me how bad she wants me right now but that her new rule "Is that she won't fuck guys on the first date anymore", obviously I know I got boyfriend zoned and that's ok, shit happens. Basically I brought that up because I thought it was funny and she said "Jesus I just can't slip one by you can I? With most guys they don't realize what I'm doing but with you... you're different ". Persisted hard to try and close but unfortunately didn't work, setup a day 2 for Tuesday. Tuesday rolls around and she flaked, not last minute or anything but says she's at the docs and has had a rough couple of days, says she still wants to see me though and asks if I'm available Friday. (Also before this there had been some somewhat sexual text messages about me being in her bed and how much better of an end to the night that would have been). I say I'm free (not playing games and just making it easy for her), so we're scheduled for tonight at the same bar we first met at and she says "It'll be our spot ".

Anyway just sent a confirmation text, but I logged back into POF and noticed she was online for the first time in a week. Obviously I know we've only been on one date so this doesn't matter at all, buuuuuut should I expect to even hear from her (I mean she did flake Tuesday)? What's your experience with girls that you see online again after a first date (even if it went really well, but you didn't have sex, so clearly not that well). Also I KNOW I'm also logged in again and messaging other girls so she's probably doing the same haha. In the past Pre-GC I'd have said something to her about it, BUT I know this sounds weird, creepy, needy, stalkerish and the like so I've pledged not to do such dumb shit like that anymore. I did view her though, hope that doesn't come off weird.

ALSO, I went on another date last night, really hot 5 foot tall girl that really has her life together at 19. Said she "Thought I was really fuckin cute, blew off an assignment to come meet me and had an amazing time on our date" (we just went to Dennys lol). Like at the end of the date after 2.5 hours she said "Let's go chat more outside, you're really cute and I'm really enjoying talking to you". Thing was everytime I made a move she said "It takes me a while to be ok with physical contact, I hate one night stands", we talked a bit about sex and I tried to sexual frame her and it kind of worked but she basically said she only has sex with boyfriends and guys she knows that are gonna stick around (I'm aware I probably got boyfriend zoned). We didn't even end the date with a kiss, but she said it went really well (teased her through a lot of it, good playful frame maintained).

Now... my mistake on there was probably asking her to text me if she wants to go out again, she said she'd be busy but she'd make sure to reply to me today if I texted her (but I didn't want to seem needy as that was a major complaint for her with online dating so far), so I just said "text me if you wanna go out again!"

I also noticed her "Online" this morning, am I thinking way too much about this? I mean shit haha I was online tryna message some new girls too, they just doing the same thing?

1) you shouldn't care, you're playing the field and so is she there's nothing wrong with that
2) you shouldn't look, looking in itself is an investment that could get you burned(even though it is a small one)
3) you shouldn't care

In regards to your dates, when she drops these relationship frames how do you respond? because it makes all the difference in the world. With your dominance and sexual nature you should at no point accept her "boyfriend" frames. You actions need to be congruent with your vibe and your vibe is bad boy(from what I have read). However you want to play it don't accept those frames.

My current girlfriend said something very similar to that but ended up naked 2 hours later

and yeah on date 2 just leave it hanging whether the two of your will get together again and maintain a level of mystery.

Keep grinding and finding the nuances and you're going to break through

-Lotus

 

[Paulie Walnuts]

@Lotus

It typically depends on my state of mind at the time (can't always control my emotional response yet), but I have a hard time breaking away from the "boyfriend frame" if that's what the girl is trying to slot me into; I typically run with it even though I know I probably shouldn't.

The short girl from the 2nd date never texted me back, where before she was texting me every 5 fucking minutes haha; so probably a mistake.

No worries though I'm learning