Opening direct on girls with cold expression?

[Smith]

Hey guys,

I've been wondering about this for a while, but it doesn't happen to me that often in my hometown, so I usually just chalk it up as "not interested". However, today I was doing daygame in Sydney CBD and got a lot of girls who were cold the moment I said "excuse me". It usually goes like this...
A girl walking past or walking towards me on the street. I either catch up to her if she already walked past and opened her from the side, or stop her before she walked past me.
Me: "excuse me"
She looks at me without saying a word and then kept walking without making eye contact. Usually when I get this reaction, I already knew what's going to happen next if I opened direct. So I walk with them and give them a compliment
Me: "I just saw u walk past and u look really cute/have a lovely sense of style, so I have to come say hi"
Her: "thanks" still walking away and not making eye contact.
Every time I do this, I felt like I'm giving them too much "value".

I also tried a few times to open indirect/neutral when they're non responsive and kept walking. I usually asked them "Are you japanese/thai/spanish..etc?" or some other questions about them based on my observation. Most of the time they still give me a cold answer and walk away the same.

Now I feel like walking away and not give them a compliment if they don't stop, because I rarely have a good interaction (probably 1 out of 8) from this type of initial reaction. Most of the time, it goes nowhere because I think you're fighting against time if u walk with her and she's not that receptive yet. In some cases, even if I do get her number, it's a flaky one for sure. I'm sure there's a way to open up these girls. I remembered Tyler talked about keep talking to them until their eyes light up, then that's when u stop walking....But this is easier said than done. Next time I might try teasing them "I've never burn so much calories while talking to a girl."
Any advice or opinion on this is appreciated. Thanks =)

 

[Smurf]

Hey man, good.shit getting out there

Make sure your voice tone is really good on your opener. The more I've opened girls, the more I've realized if I use a really genuine sounding voice I'll get a better reaction from them.

I'll have to see if the whole keep talking thing works. I hate walking two blocks out of my way for an interaction to go nowhere.

I've actually been wondering about how to properly phrase a direct sexual opener. Every time I've tried that I've gotten pretty bad reactions haha

Keep it up dude, and if I can I'll see if I can test out how walking with them works out!

Jake

 

[Richard]

Take a lesson from Sasha Daygame and approach anyway. Look at the 45 second mark.

Again Here.

This is pretty much what I do with girls who have a cold expression. Inject some fun and playful energy into your approach to relax them a little bit.

Girls who shrug off my initial approach and keep walking I'll either do as Sasha does or I'll persist with different questions. I think Chase covers this somewhere on the site. Found it!

Anyway, my goal is to just get a reaction out of her; a smile, a middle finger, a laugh, something to break her out of the cold expression and I tend to succeed. Sometimes, these girls are just in a hurry with no time, sometimes they'll stop and I'll proceed as usual. But, I follow up a positive reaction with a reward of some kind to keep the momentum going in my favor.

-Richard

 

[Smith]

Thanks guys,

I went out today again and chatted with probably 20 more girls. Tried the indirect direct. I could tell their expression soften up when I go indirect in the beginning with some remark/questions, and then I give them a compliment, they are a lot warmer but most would still eject the conversation because it felt like the purpose of the interaction was over. It seems like going indirect direct on a girl who's walking is not very effective.

I also tried Sasha's method of reapproaching a girl if she didn't acknowledge u in the first place. It didn't go well that one time I tried it lol. It was the 2nd approach of the day, and I was still warming up. But yea..it was awkward hahaha. She didn't even make eye contact.

Then I had a mini breakthrough later in the afternoon. I stopped giving a fuck about what I'm going to say, and just say what feels natural. I know it's a common thing in the PUA community to not say sorry in your opener, but it feels right to say it, especially if you're going to go direct... It makes you less intimidating and more human.
Me: "Excuse me" She was walking, I opened from the side.
Her: "u alright?"
Me: "ha yea I'm alright. Sorry, don't mean to be rude" I lightly touched her arm as I said this. The funny thing was I didn't plan to do any of this.
Her: "no it's ok!" she smiled.
Me: "I saw u walking by and u look really cute, I have to come say hi"
Then she gave me the most feminine reaction I have ever seen...legs crossed and eyes looked down. I was surprised. Then after vibing for a bit, she told me she needed to catch a bus, otherwise she won't get home. I could have lead her to the bus stop, but I was still surprised that I got this far because this girl was a stunner. talk about success barrier haha.

Then I tried it out a few more times with variations of it, I found that backing off a bit before u go direct disarms girls who probably have been approached by a lot of salesman and homeless people in a metropolis. It sets u aside and it feels more socially acceptable I guess.

 

[Smith]

So if you feel congruent saying sorry, then say sorry!!

Hey dude, thanks for burning this concept into my brain - be congruent. I kinda just realized why Sasha's method of reapproaching a girl didn't work for me, because I didn't feel congruent doing it! I was doing it for the sake of experimenting with it.

 

[Drck]

Me: "I saw u walking by and u look really cute, I have to come say hi"
Then she gave me the most feminine reaction I have ever seen...legs crossed and eyes looked down. I was surprise

I'm not surprised by her reaction at all. Yes, you put her on a pedestal right there, she knows right away you are looking for a girl. I mean, she knows it anyway but you just magnified it 10x by this line. She knows you are sniffing for pussy, that's why she crossed her legs: No pussy for you boy...

You are giving her a compliment for how she looks. You may think that you don't do, but she does. In her head she probably hears: "You look cute, I really like how you look - so let me buy you a lunch"... Errrr!!! She smells Mr. Nice Guy right there...

Drop that line, don't compliment girls for anything that they don't deserve to be complimented on. She did nothing to look pretty, that's work of her parents, thus she doesn't deserve compliment. Only compliment her for e.g. compliance (as a general rule). She probably hears similar line every other day, she already knows she is cute from 50 other guys. I'm surprised she didn't look up with bored face... Tell her something she doesn't hear every day...

 

[Richard]

Radeng and Drck,

You're both semi-correct.

Optimally, you do not want to compliment a girl for something that she hasn't done (like being beautiful). Direct compliments are the best when they include specifically why you think whatever you're complimenting is attractive. If you see a girl walking past you and she catches your eye, there's something about her that stands out in your mind, and when you can verbalize and explain what that is to her then you've got a solid opener.

Now, telling a girl that you "think she's cute" does depend on delivery. If I say "I saw you walking and had to come say Hey, I'm Richard" but I say it with a lusty, sexy undertone while giving her an up-down look then it's definitely not platonic and that doesn't equate to Mr. Nice Guy - that equates to a Sexual Man.

As for her legs crossing - this one is specific. If she crossed her legs with her feet pointing towards you then it's submissive and a sign of immense comfort. You're putting yourself off-balance and it's a physiologically vulnerable state to be in which is why you only see people who are comfortable with one another do this. Looking down is definitely submissive.

Finally, if you're approaching an obviously hot chick and your opener sounds like you put her on a pedestal.. then it's fine because you're showing her that you have the balls to approach anyway. Shit, back when I was starting out I'd say exactly what I was feeling or thinking, ie; "Hey, I saw you standing here and I thought you were cute. I wanted to come say Hi and talk but my mind is totally blank." Yes, I owned up to being nervous and anxious but I approached anyway and women loved it because I was doing something that made me feel uncomfortable.

Anyhow, Smith: I'm a firm advocate in people saying what they feel and think instead of consciously deciding on what the best angle to play is. When you understand your role with women (party guy, adventurous guy, fun guy, etc.) and you are able to use the strengths of your natural role to seduce women then you get your optimal seduction style. Even Chase admits this himself. It makes interactions more smooth because you're not pretending and women become attracted to a more genuine you which keeps attraction going slightly longer.

-Richard