- Joined
- May 12, 2016
- Messages
- 231
http://www.city-data.com/forum/psycholo ... ve-so.html (VERY RELEVANT TO MY SITUATION)
There's one class in my college where it's full of characters in there.
There's guys who are your typical meatheads, full of muscle and your stereotypical 'alpha' males with brash. 'Presence/Physical Dominance'
There's guys who are class clowns. 'Loud and Makes class Laugh'
There's a clique of guys who's very stylish and has a clique of their own. 'Cool Hipster Kids Really fashionable' Aloof/Snickering To Themselves
And there's me. I usually mind my own business and roll solo. And just talk to women around me.
In this setting, I usually don't get intimidated by any groups of guys really.
But for some reason, the 'Cool Hipster' kids get under my skin a little bit. (It may be due to my past history with them when I was in middle school)
I get little bit insecure around them.
For me, when I dress up, I get a lot of attention. In fact, last semester, I got TOO much attention from guys and girls. Some guys would look at me and get extremely insecure (Look at me with hostility vibe) while women always tried to flirt with me and talk to me.
With that being said, I dressed down this semester for two reasons
1. To focus on my studies and be low key, because I'll be applying to transfer next semester.
2. Learn to get attention/attraction from women, without relying on fashion so much.
As I kind of feel 'naked' when I don't dress well.
Which may be the reason for me being insecure around kids who 'dress very well'.
In my head I find myself thinking 'Man, these kids think they look cool just dressing great and sitting back to judge other kids'
And in reality, socially I beat them by a mile. Because it's the typical hipster kids who sits at the back of the class while acting superior/aloof.
But I'm not sure how to go about this situation because this won't be the only situation.
My question is, when people act 'aloof/cool/indifferent/snobbish', I think it generally makes people by natural reaction, feel little insecure. As if almost to say, am I not good enough to be in that circle?
But honestly, when guys/girls are aloof, it's usually a defense mechanism to hide some insecurity in them and in return try to make YOU insecure. And even though I understand this, I still feel insecure around these types of guys, almost as if I need to seek approval from them. BUT I do control it VERY WELL and mirror the aloofness. Women tend to be into me more in general. But I always have this thought like, 'What if the girl gets more curious about these guys cause they're being mysterious or aloof?'
Anyone ever experience this type of situation? Where 'cool looking' guys act aloof/indifferent and makes you a bit insecure.
And what's the best way to go about these situations?
(I usually just act aloof back)
There's one class in my college where it's full of characters in there.
There's guys who are your typical meatheads, full of muscle and your stereotypical 'alpha' males with brash. 'Presence/Physical Dominance'
There's guys who are class clowns. 'Loud and Makes class Laugh'
There's a clique of guys who's very stylish and has a clique of their own. 'Cool Hipster Kids Really fashionable' Aloof/Snickering To Themselves
And there's me. I usually mind my own business and roll solo. And just talk to women around me.
In this setting, I usually don't get intimidated by any groups of guys really.
But for some reason, the 'Cool Hipster' kids get under my skin a little bit. (It may be due to my past history with them when I was in middle school)
I get little bit insecure around them.
For me, when I dress up, I get a lot of attention. In fact, last semester, I got TOO much attention from guys and girls. Some guys would look at me and get extremely insecure (Look at me with hostility vibe) while women always tried to flirt with me and talk to me.
With that being said, I dressed down this semester for two reasons
1. To focus on my studies and be low key, because I'll be applying to transfer next semester.
2. Learn to get attention/attraction from women, without relying on fashion so much.
As I kind of feel 'naked' when I don't dress well.
Which may be the reason for me being insecure around kids who 'dress very well'.
In my head I find myself thinking 'Man, these kids think they look cool just dressing great and sitting back to judge other kids'
And in reality, socially I beat them by a mile. Because it's the typical hipster kids who sits at the back of the class while acting superior/aloof.
But I'm not sure how to go about this situation because this won't be the only situation.
My question is, when people act 'aloof/cool/indifferent/snobbish', I think it generally makes people by natural reaction, feel little insecure. As if almost to say, am I not good enough to be in that circle?
But honestly, when guys/girls are aloof, it's usually a defense mechanism to hide some insecurity in them and in return try to make YOU insecure. And even though I understand this, I still feel insecure around these types of guys, almost as if I need to seek approval from them. BUT I do control it VERY WELL and mirror the aloofness. Women tend to be into me more in general. But I always have this thought like, 'What if the girl gets more curious about these guys cause they're being mysterious or aloof?'
Anyone ever experience this type of situation? Where 'cool looking' guys act aloof/indifferent and makes you a bit insecure.
And what's the best way to go about these situations?
(I usually just act aloof back)
