Overthinking ?? another fumble.😭

[SmooothOperator]

So my main question with this report is what themes , frames should I be looking to set when texting a girl. I feel like I usually just go with the flow and it goes decently. I guess I’m overthinking this rn but I’ve basically chalked up this one to the game.

when I’m in person Ik what I’m doing. I got a destination and a roadmap. Now I’m conversant with the theory that the meetup is the goal and I agree. But if the girl isn’t down first time how do you build her up to that point yk.

Anyway here we go. Critique welcome


So I’m studying in the library when this girl walks in looking for a whiteboard marker. She’s tall, slender model physique, long hair, great shape



I’m taken a back for a second as I can’t believe a stunning chick is going to walk into my lap so easily.



I straight up tell her she’s super hot and start talking. She’s from outta state and hates this town. She’s had a knife pulled in her at a club cause she wasn’t playing along with some guys and she had a test that day so instadate is off the table l



I ask and She enthusiastically gives me her number. I tell her to get back to her studying. Before she leaves I notice her nails and compliment them. Also hold her hand in mine as I examine them(idk if this truly counts as kino but I try to hold her hand a little longer than normal)



She leaves and the texts are included below.



Some general thoughts. I think I tried to do too much too soon.

Another big mistake was not texting on the first day and continuing the conversation we had earlier. I feel like there is a certain kind of magic on the first day that sets the tone for the rest of the interaction

Lastly I’ve been experimenting with soft closing so I was less pushy for a meet and asking all these questions - trying to build investment/ interest.

Think I should have asked her schedule for the weekend from the jump but we live

Here are the texts

https://flic.kr/p/2pf9kiH
Here I was trying to set sth up. Joke is I’m the tutor and maybe roleplay about some private lessons or sth but she doesn’t reply until 6hrs later and I make the mistake of leaving her on delivered and going to bed (9:30 yikes)

https://flic.kr/p/2pfavCF
I then try to bait her and then ask how the exam went and a few more qns which don’t go over well (I realize these are topics that would’ve hit if she was just fresh out of the exam and feeling those post exam emotions)

https://flic.kr/p/2pf4QLM
I then pivot to a statement she made earlier about hating our college town and talk about her going home for the weekend.
I then go with an obvious joke and idk if she took it seriously. Cause after that I was going with this compliance test and then I would ask for a meetup but we didn’t get that far



When / if she texts back I’m planning on leaving her on ice for about 4 days . Then text back saying I’ve been busy and propose a meet up cause I think that will be the spark
- and Ik that rn I don’t have compliance but I think that Hail Mary is the last option available

 

[fog]

pretty good, a little awkward, youre closing too quick, try more slowly fleshing out the difference between her school feelings and more pleasurable feelings outside of school...really exploring who she is sensually outside of the analytical identity…. and creating a desire for her to escape the negative school feelings and experience what youre offering her....theres no rush...

 

[TomInHo]

I personally don't like the dynamic. Trying to be too clever and even I didn't know the tutor was supposed to be you until i read your breakdown.

Then your soft close seems like too much investment. You are talking about going to X place for the weekend. Does that imply you are going somewhere for the weekend together? That's way too much and if a girl texted me that I would be hesitant too

Also the hard close was off. You rushed it by trying to nail her down before getting more info

A better way to have done it could have been like..

Her: I would so do that
You: I don't blame you. Feeling spontaneous rn?

Then based of her answer you will know if you can close then or set up a date for another time

TLDR: Chill out on being too clever. Believe the girl digs you already and have a pleasant conversation before inviting her out to do something low pressure

 

[Skills]

I personally don't like the dynamic. Trying to be too clever and even I didn't know the tutor was supposed to be you until i read your breakdown.

Then your soft close seems like too much investment. You are talking about going to X place for the weekend. Does that imply you are going somewhere for the weekend together? That's way too much and if a girl texted me that I would be hesitant too

Also the hard close was off. You rushed it by trying to nail her down before getting more info

A better way to have done it could have been like..

Her: I would so do that
You: I don't blame you. Feeling spontaneous rn?

Then based of her answer you will know if you can close then or set up a date for another time

TLDR: Chill out on being too clever. Believe the girl digs you already and have a pleasant conversation before inviting her out to do something low pressure

Yeah he over did it, came out awkward and try hard, chill a bit.... smooth you are not do in bad just fractionate a bit so it does not come out awkward puaish more human normal...That is what t is saying about "clever" so i would fractionate more, so yes flirt but more normal mix

So basically you talk normal, then you throw in a flirt to gauge, back to normal with the goal of pushing forward.... What you don't what is a flirt frlirt flirt to every answer that is what i call puaish awkard/clever it comes out weird like you are not human, even though you are smooth get me??

He also made a slight mistake when asking about the text then cut her off... "i mean not the best" I would say oh noo, sorry to hear that, and then go into the rest, maybe ____________low investment activity, can help you feel better blah blah (to gauge)

 

[fog]

too clever

when I think of what you tominho means by clever, I think…..gamey and baity.

initially the tutor thing is great because it gets within her mindset of the current moment, but then decreases because it ended up layered in that slimy wetness

me personally I would have... explored topics like the pursuit of knowledge, inspiration & personal excellence, fantasies of extreme physics intelligence… to approach getting in her mindset like he intentionally or unintentionally did initially with the tutor thing. then pacing out to more general but related topics outside of her immediate mindset [ie a class of a satisfyingly ok lesson] to more fun sensual activities like getting home from class and really ripping into that tasty fridge ice cream being dreamt about all day...soft closing is pretty easy from there.

his text sequence looks like a compressed version of that. now whats really interesting to me is that something shorter works too here..some SHORT & SIMPLE word phrasing rearrangements. like this for example:

A better way to have done it could have been like..

Her: I would so do that
You: I don't blame you. Feeling spontaneous rn?

 

[SmooothOperator]

Yeah he over did it, came out awkward and try hard, chill a bit.... smooth you are not do in bad just fractionate a bit so it does not come out awkward puaish more human normal...That is what t is saying about "clever" so i would fractionate more, so yes flirt but more normal mix

So basically you talk normal, then you throw in a flirt to gauge, back to normal with the goal of pushing forward.... What you don't what is a flirt frlirt flirt to every answer that is what i call puaish awkard/clever it comes out weird like you are not human, even though you are smooth get me??

He also made a slight mistake when asking about the text then cut her off... "i mean not the best" I would say oh noo, sorry to hear that, and then go into the rest, maybe ____________low investment activity, can help you feel better blah blah (to gauge)

Thank you skills, I always treasure your advice. It was helpful in a LR I’ll be posting soon

hopefully I can salvage this one when/if she responds.

if not, I’ll double text in a week and try to see how she’s doing before soft and hard closing

 

[SmooothOperator]

I personally don't like the dynamic. Trying to be too clever and even I didn't know the tutor was supposed to be you until i read your breakdown.

Then your soft close seems like too much investment. You are talking about going to X place for the weekend. Does that imply you are going somewhere for the weekend together? That's way too much and if a girl texted me that I would be hesitant too

Also the hard close was off. You rushed it by trying to nail her down before getting more info

A better way to have done it could have been like..

Her: I would so do that
You: I don't blame you. Feeling spontaneous rn?

Then based of her answer you will know if you can close then or set up a date for another time

TLDR: Chill out on being too clever. Believe the girl digs you already and have a pleasant conversation before inviting her out to do something low pressure

Thanks man, sometimes I really be doing too much. But I’ll just be more composed and simpler going forward

 

[SmooothOperator]

when I think of what you tominho means by clever, I think…..gamey and baity.

initially the tutor thing is great because it gets within her mindset of the current moment, but then decreases because it ended up layered in that slimy wetness

me personally I would have... explored topics like the pursuit of knowledge, inspiration & personal excellence, fantasies of extreme physics intelligence… to approach getting in her mindset like he intentionally or unintentionally did initially with the tutor thing. then pacing out to more general but related topics outside of her immediate mindset [ie a class of a satisfyingly ok lesson] to more fun sensual activities like getting home from class and really ripping into that tasty fridge ice cream being dreamt about all day...soft closing is pretty easy from there.

his text sequence looks like a compressed version of that. now whats really interesting to me is that something shorter works too here..some SHORT & SIMPLE word phrasing rearrangements. like this for example:

Yeah, i see how things could’ve been stated differently and how I should have been patient and fleshed things out more.
Hopefully I can salvage this situation, I’m thinking of giving it a while before texting
hey ,
and talking abt my weekend, then asking about hers and going from there

may only reservation is I don’t want to have long double texts - it just looks bad - even in the girls mind yk

 

[fog]

I’m thinking of giving it a while before texting
hey ,
and talking abt my weekend, then asking about hers and going from there

sweet

may only reservation is I don’t want to have long double texts - it just looks bad - even in the girls mind yk

yes do not send LONG TEXTS - those are needy!

and double texts are also needy in certain situations

always aim to talk with her, not to her....its a give and take conversation

 

[Skills]

Thank you skills, I always treasure your advice. It was helpful in a LR I’ll be posting soon

hopefully I can salvage this one when/if she responds.

if not, I’ll double text in a week and try to see how she’s doing before soft and hard closing

No need to double text just ping...

 

[SmooothOperator]

So She replied.
And it’s a positive reply. But I still feel like compliance is low because she took a whole 24+ hours to do so

https://flic.kr/p/2pfbkNn
Part of the feedback is I’ve been trying too hard and need to simplify my approach.
Right now my mind is telling me I have to wait a couple of hours (maybe till sun evening) reward/acknowledge her reply and then maybe ask how her weekend was then soft close but I just hope this is not me overdoing things again

 

[SmooothOperator]

I personally don't like the dynamic. Trying to be too clever and even I didn't know the tutor was supposed to be you until i read your breakdown.

Then your soft close seems like too much investment. You are talking about going to X place for the weekend. Does that imply you are going somewhere for the weekend together? That's way too much and if a girl texted me that I would be hesitant too

Also the hard close was off. You rushed it by trying to nail her down before getting more info

A better way to have done it could have been like..

Her: I would so do that
You: I don't blame you. Feeling spontaneous rn?

Then based of her answer you will know if you can close then or set up a date for another time

TLDR: Chill out on being too clever. Believe the girl digs you already and have a pleasant conversation before inviting her out to do something low pressure

So She replied.
And it’s a positive reply. But I still feel like compliance is low because she took a whole 24+ hours to do so

https://flic.kr/p/2pfbkNn
Part of the feedback is I’ve been trying too hard and need to simplify my approach.
Right now my mind is telling me I have to wait a couple of hours (maybe till sun evening) reward/acknowledge her reply and then maybe ask how her weekend was then soft close but I just hope this is not me overdoing things again

 

[Surveyor]

Didn’t read all the replies but look at that first page of text, her responding with an image she took unbidden is clearly pretty good compliance

 

[TomInHo]

Part of the feedback is I’ve been trying too hard and need to simplify my approach.
Right now my mind is telling me I have to wait a couple of hours (maybe till sun evening) reward/acknowledge her reply and then maybe ask how her weekend was then soft close but I just hope this is not me overdoing things again

That's retarded.

Just reply and get the momentum rolling to close on a high note. Don't overcomplicate this

 

[SmooothOperator]

Didn’t read all the replies but look at that first page of text, her responding with an image she took unbidden is clearly pretty good compliance

I thought so too thanks

 

[SmooothOperator]

That's retarded.

Just reply and get the momentum rolling to close on a high note. Don't overcomplicate this

Noted