Possible fix when approaching multiple girls together?

[Echoes]

Hey all!

Kicking myself for this one... Approached a couple cute girls in the gym and they were both into it. The one I liked more (colored eyes, leggings showed nice butt) was also seemingly more engaged, so after some back and forth, I asked if she'd like to hang out some time. They say she has a boyfriend and the other one is single.... felt toast at that point. I joked about asking the other one out, but said that would be mean. My mind is still not readjusted to pickup/seduction enough, so it felt unrecoverable. The kicker is the single one was eyeing me earlier, so she was a warm lead that I blew up...

My potential fix is simply asking all girls involved if they're single conversationally (not AS direct as with a solo girl), to get a better lay of the land. Thoughts? Other strategies to probe their status before going in too deep, or even ways to fix it without making the second girl feel like leftovers?

Thanks all!

 

[ulrich]

My potential fix is simply asking all girls involved if they're single conversationally (not AS pointed as using it on a solo girl), to get a better lay of the land.

This ^

Flirting is a game of uncertainty… “does he like me?”, “is he for real?”, “is he a player?”, “can I get him to commit?”…

At every moment you’re unraveling mystery from her and she from you.

When you showed your hand, you made a big bet that didn’t pan out.
Next time, try to scan out the terrain a little more before committing to these kind of frames.

You could say things like..
“So, what brings you here? You into picking up athletic boys?”
“What does the boyfriend think of you spending all the time in the gym?”
“You strike me like the fit girl who has a scrawny nerdy boyfriend at home… did I guess right?”

Sometimes they will take the hint (or not) and reveal if they’re single or taken.

By the way… from the way you told the story, I don’t think it’s game over with the second girl… maybe you should try flirting again with her in your next opportunity.

 

[Echoes]

You could say things like..
“So, what brings you here? You into picking up athletic boys?”
“What does the boyfriend think of you spending all the time in the gym?”
“You strike me like the fit girl who has a scrawny nerdy boyfriend at home… did I guess right?”

This is what I mean by my mind isn't in this mode, yet. I flirt and am playful, but not strategically where I'd bring out useful things in a playful way like your examples. Disclaimer: they hardly spoke English (cute Latinas), so that upped the difficulty a bit.

By the way… from the way you told the story, I don’t think it’s game over with the second girl… maybe you should try flirting again with her in your next opportunity.

I had a feeling, I did scope out an opening, but they went to the treadmills and a different girl came in (separate) who looks nicer than the first 2 and was right by the second girl lol, sooo left it for now. I also may be moving away within a week, so that makes things interesting.

I like the framing of it being a back and forth mystery with key points being tracked!