Proper response to mockery by highly skilled people?

[Dough]

This happens very rarely, but I still want to know how to deal with the situation because it really pisses me off. It basically goes like this:

I do or say something that is on the edge of what a group considers acceptable. Someone with high social status will highlight I'm not conforming to the group, but in an extremely socially skilled way as to seem like an innocent comment that can be easily misdirected.
Usually this is done with a backhanded compliment.

If I react or point it out, then they get to say "whoa chill bro, I didn't mean anything rude by it" and I look like a schizo. If I ignore them, then they've succeeded at tooling me because they leverage their higher social status. If I try to tool them back, then well, that's a contest won by nobody and I don't want to be that kind of person anyway.

So what's the right response in this sort of situation? It seems like all my choices are a losing play.

 

[Chase]

@Dough,

A few gracious-sounding-yet-dismissive stock responses for things like this will usually do the trick:

• "I always appreciate your input, man."
• "Thanks, dude, you're the best."
• "You know it, chief."

Said with eye contact and a slight smile and a lackadaisical nod of the head, with a Ryan Reynolds-like "I'm not sure if he's serious or kidding" vocal delivery. You'll be solid.

Chase

 

[Dough]

Thanks, that sounds crazy effective!

 

[DarkKnight]

So what's the right response in this sort of situation? It seems like all my choices are a losing play.

Only because you believe this to be the case. People always ping eachother to see how to treat them, usually when your nonverbals are strong and you show a face like "riiight" they tend to feel put down in turn. Although I think this also depends on circumstances because younger people seem to need more overt comment (Chase gives perfect examples).

My favorite response is nodding my head in a mocking way being a bit amused, not really being serious. In red dead redemption II Arthur has to catch a guy (benedict albright) for a bounty and the guy tries to dissuade him by saying he is a healer, he has an aura! (Basically he is bullshitting).. and Arthur does a similar kind of move.

But when in less a jolly mood I can show contempt or raise my eyebrows basically internally deciding the ladder climber is a moron.. people tend to take note and it will surprise you how many times they try to get your validation , sometimes covertly. Because they know they have lost.

This is also an experience thing. When you have seen this behavior a lot it does not really faze you and you do not feel inclined to defend yourself that much (unless really public attack on your reputation, sometimes you need to act)