QUESTION, LONG POST: Is there anything I could have done differently with these 2 girls I met out?

[AdamEngineer]

Hey guys!

First wanna say, this site is loads better than RSD. They're greedy and requires you to endlessly spend money to get information you don't need. I'm glad to be back here.

CONTEXT, STORY 1
I went out last night and had a generally good time. I am not terrible at game but need a lot of improvement.
This girl I met (we'll name her S) walked passed me and I stopped her.

"Hey I'm Adam, I know you're with your friends but I think you're cute."
"Haha thanks I'm S"

S is a 21 y/o in college going for her medical degree, from California, has Syrian decent.

I then proceed to offer her a drink. This is usually how I get girls to move around with me. It doesn't make sense to just say hey lets go here. Anyway, we proceeded to talk and she got touchy, we were talking for about 20 minutes then we started making out, like hardcore. We stopped talked a bit more, then danced, got another drink, and then made-out again. She went to the bathroom and came back, and said she had to go back to her friends, it was her friends birthday party. She told me to take her number down and I did. She said "text me, we can fuck." We kissed goodbye and that was it.

I saw her later in the night, and went to go say hi. One of her guy friends said

"Hey man she's done for tonight, she's pretty drunk."

The girl kept dancing with her friends and didn't make any motion towards me. I texted her today and no response.

Can anyone explain if my game was the cause of this? Or is this me overthinking it, and the cause was that she was actually drunk and didn't want to go home with me? I know game can't solve every problem, but hell I thought I did a damn good job. She was very interested in me the whole time, and not just for free drinks. She asked questions, flirted, etc. I don't think a girl would go through all that for free drinks, would they? She was a 21 year old in college, so I know they're different than older women.

CONTEXT, STORY 2

After S left, and before I ran into her again later that night, I was standing with one of my guy friends. These 2 Indian girls came up to us. We're both hispanic/white mixes so maybe they thought we were attractive. I seem to fair pretty well with foreign girls.

He talked with one girl and I talked with a girl whose name also begins with S, we'll call her S2. She was 21 from the state and was studying to be a dentist. Although we did talk, she wasn't flirting with me but definitely seem interested. After talking for about 10 minutes the conversation went:

her: "Hey so wanna do shots?"
me: "Haha shots? Hey how about you buy me the first round and I'll buy the second?"

She laughed I proceed to lightly tease her about it. Her friend actually came over around this time because it was also her birthday, which I'm starting to think is a code for we need to go. So I never bought her a drink, but we did make-out for a tiny bit. I got her number and that was it. She was far more sober than the other girl was.

I ran into S2 near the coat check. She smiled, and we talked a bit more. I said it was nice seeing you, hey how about one more kiss? We kissed, and then I left. I texted her today and no response. My message for both girls was:

"Hey _____, it was great talking with you last night! I hope you didn't get into too much trouble after I left "

Again, I didn't buy this girl a drink, we did make-out, she seemed cool and invested, but yet nothing. Why? If I had gotten this far with other girls I at least get a text back. I tried to take both girls home by saying "hey let's get food" or something casual. But I also have to learn to not push for something that isn't a mutual desire. If she wanted to go home with me, there wouldn't be any resistance. In my experience, there never is.

Any explanation on this, whether it's my game, or just the way girls are sometimes, would be grand. My answer to all this? Alcohol. It screws with your rational decision making and makes you do certain things.

The week before I met a cute girl. 10 minutes into the conversation we made-out and I had to leave. I got a date out of it, but no 2nd date. To be fair, I think I fucked up the location and logistics a bit. It was too much for a first date. Thanks guys.

 

[AdamEngineer]

UPDATE:

The second girl texted me back, she said "Hey! I had a great night hope you did too!
Any ideas how I should proceed?

 

[Skills]

-no is not your game however, a small nitpick on your game is you are going for the drink too fast with almost no investment BUT it is still working for you... I seen it work for some guys, i personally do not think is optimal.

- you have not giving the enough time to respond, give it time...

- also remember women experience a state change in clubs.... read this

p.s. i wrote this before your second post lol

 

[Mr.Rob]

Anyway, we proceeded to talk and she got touchy, we were talking for about 20 minutes then we started making out, like hardcore. We stopped talked a bit more, then danced, got another drink, and then made-out again. She went to the bathroom and came back, and said she had to go back to her friends, it was her friends birthday party. She told me to take her number

This is something RSD always missed in their teaching but making out and kissing before you isolate a girl for sex always kills the tension and intrigue and after the make out can cause them to realize "oh this is headed towards sex.. let me but the breaks on".

Instead you can build and keep the tension by using sex talk (read articles by Alek Rolstad) or touch + Chase framing (read articles by Chase Amante) etc. Basically avoid heavy and hot make outs with girls your serious about pulling home (until you're ready to have sex that is).

Other than that or sounds like she generally just got too drunk after that so no worries on losing her.

On general try getting more investment from girls and then moving them 5-10 minutes into the conversation (after you've gotten some good investment). Then move things either to building intrigue, deep diving, and sexual touch and go for the pull.

Leave making out with girls for when you actually pull them back home. There is no real purpose for it other than showing your a sexual guy but you can accomplish this end much better with other methods that make girls more interested rather than lose intrigue.

Making out is something I always saw RSD do more do because it's flashy and works well for marketing ("Tyler gets double make out") rather than working well for seduction.

Make her earn your kisses

Welcome to the community here tho man. Girls Chase is a bit different than RSD but both together make a powerful duo of frame work to operate from.

Hope to see you around and get to the next level here on your girls reports.

 

[Skills]

ok i already talked about the making out and stuff before in some posts...

If you make out right away without bubble, yes it is a mistake cause you amp up the sexual tension and then crashes, similar to hi i think you are cute? do you have a man? let me get your number? = you got nothing my point is if you go for the kiss right away and amp up the sexual tension with nothing else you got nothing the exception is if you can work it out after which is a bit harder.

But if you build a sexual bubble which is with tension and it could include sex talk + make out etc... then is the same outcome as "leave when you pull them back home"

 

[BigPapa]

I also agree with what the other guys said , you went for the kiss without having a plan in mind to take this girls home .


kissing makes you feel validated and is a great feeling , but you still gonna jerk off when you go home alone

if I were you , I would just try to do a/b testing , like delaying the kiss till she is back at or towards your place , this way you will have to focus on Pulling her out of the place and see if the end results improve or not

 

[Skills]

I also agree with what the other guys said , you went for the kiss without having a plan in mind to take this girls home .


kissing makes you feel validated and is a great feeling , but you still gonna jerk off when you go home alone

if I were you , I would just try to do a/b testing , like delaying the kiss till she is back at or towards your place , this way you will have to focus on Pulling her out of the place and see if the end results improve or not

what an excellent point.. Yes you go for kissing and touching and you think you are big pimp get validated and do go for the complete pull.... Ha! excellent point... But if you do a bubble correctly without being lazy and go for the pull still works, i have done it multiple times....

 

[AdamEngineer]

-no is not your game however, a small nitpick on your game is you are going for the drink too fast with almost no investment BUT it is still working for you... I seen it work for some guys, i personally do not think is optimal.

- you have not giving the enough time to respond, give it time...

- also remember women experience a state change in clubs.... read this

p.s. i wrote this before your second post lol

Yes, I know about the drink and having her invest more. That is just me sort of running out of material and panicking so I move to isolate. I'll have to read state changes. That stuff still doesn't make sense. I've asked my female friends why this happens, they said its mostly emotional combined with alcohol. She wanted to have sex but it was a bad idea so she avoided the situation from escalating.

 

[AdamEngineer]

This is something RSD always missed in their teaching but making out and kissing before you isolate a girl for sex always kills the tension and intrigue and after the make out can cause them to realize "oh this is headed towards sex.. let me but the breaks on".

Instead you can build and keep the tension by using sex talk (read articles by Alek Rolstad) or touch + Chase framing (read articles by Chase Amante) etc. Basically avoid heavy and hot make outs with girls your serious about pulling home (until you're ready to have sex that is).

Other than that or sounds like she generally just got too drunk after that so no worries on losing her.

On general try getting more investment from girls and then moving them 5-10 minutes into the conversation (after you've gotten some good investment). Then move things either to building intrigue, deep diving, and sexual touch and go for the pull.

Leave making out with girls for when you actually pull them back home. There is no real purpose for it other than showing your a sexual guy but you can accomplish this end much better with other methods that make girls more interested rather than lose intrigue.

Making out is something I always saw RSD do more do because it's flashy and works well for marketing ("Tyler gets double make out") rather than working well for seduction.

Make her earn your kisses

Welcome to the community here tho man. Girls Chase is a bit different than RSD but both together make a powerful duo of frame work to operate from.

Hope to see you around and get to the next level here on your girls reports.

Thanks for the reply, that makes a lot of sense. That is odd to me how making out kills tension? It just makes me more horny, so shouldn't it do as well to the girl? Often, I've pulled girls after making out with them, other times I haven't. It doesn't seem to be consistent to have a certain answer. But I will take your advice, as I imagine it builds more suspense. I also couldn't tell if she was drunk, I swear people hold their alcohol well.

 

[AdamEngineer]

I also agree with what the other guys said , you went for the kiss without having a plan in mind to take this girls home .


kissing makes you feel validated and is a great feeling , but you still gonna jerk off when you go home alone

if I were you , I would just try to do a/b testing , like delaying the kiss till she is back at or towards your place , this way you will have to focus on Pulling her out of the place and see if the end results improve or not

Whats a/b testing? Unless those are just variables you are mentioning for the example. Yea I see how kissing does this but I always thought kissing makes girls horny. I mean I expected her to just stay with me, that is what usually happens. Sometimes I don't even game, the girl was looking to hookup and well then thats a different story. To be honest she was probably the hottest girl I've ever made-out with so it was kinda hard not too. It was also coming from a mile away haha.

 

[BigPapa]

@AdamEngineer the main problem i think is your mindset , basically from what you wrote on this thread you are like well I approached , she liked me and I did not know what to do anymore so I kissed her and I liked the validation and feeling of kissing a hot girl and did not push for anything .

The correct mindset will be like , I approached her , she likes me and how the hell can I pull her out to my apartment for her to see how a real man makes love with a beautiful woman

that is why I was recommending not to kiss her till you do not try to pull her out to your place , so your mind will be focused on the pull and not the kiss

kissing does not mean anything anymore for a woman , they kiss with a ton of guys and most of them start chasing her after , because well in their mind they kissed so it means that she likes him a lot , which might or might not be the case .

Me personally , I lost a lot of girls escalating sexually outside of my place and could not pull them to my place , because she knows what will happen if she comes to my place and starts to feel anxious because she starts thinking ( does he truly likes me , is he in only for the bang , will he go cold after , will the sex be good , etc ) .

same thing happens to me also with girls that wanted commitment , then went cold for a period of time , and came back . Very difficult to pull them the first time to my place without putting the extra effort

 

[Mr.Rob]

. That is odd to me how making out kills tension? It just makes me more horny, so shouldn't it do as well to the girl?

It can make her more horny... If she's in a place and setting where she's ready and safe to be horny. I.e when she's is alone with you at your place, at which point all the tension you've hopefully built up is bursting at this point as she's been anticipating your kiss for some time.

You make out in a club and she might be horny but what's more overriding than that is "oh wow sexual with this guy this is definitely leading towards sex, I'm not a slut I need to reconsider moving so fast" OR "oh this is just another club make out which means nothing"

Both of those are not conducive out comes.

It's not a set in stone rule. You can still make out with a girl and pull her home... But many times it can hurt you more than it helps you.

Better to tease her and make her earn your kisses and anticipate your embrace.

Tension and anticipation are some of the most powerful tools of a seducer.

What's the most exciting part of masturbating? Usually the anticipation leading up to ejaculation is more exciting than the release itself and after you think "that was nice but not as good as I anticipated"

People in general LOVE anticipation. Don't just spill the beans all in one go.

 

[BigPapa]

You are Spot on @Mr.Rob with the tension and anticipation

what you can do @AdamEngineer is that instead of kissing her is to go very close to her lips and look her in the eyes while with a smirk on your face and then back off and grab her hand and ask her to come with you grab a drink or something