Realization: Resistance is only verbalization of her mental dialogue for you to address (aka not Rejection)

[Bismarck]

Howdy gents.

It's been a while. Been busy IRL with other Maslow Hierarchy-related necessities that led me to basically suspend seduction-related activities for a few months.

Another thing that I've been intermittently working on with mixed results has been removing all low back pain. Sadly this popped up about mid-June and has now become more or less chronic again (due to making the mistake of sitting for too long without standing up on two trips, prematurely recommencing swimming, and the vaccine).

Anyway, had my first date since March last Sunday with a pretty, hot, slim, shortish German village-born and bred Philosophy PhD brunette after some social circle action on Monday of the same week when I snagged her digitos and built the investment, holding frame and using SECT to get her looking forward to things.

Now keep in mind I'm in rusty city. Still though, made her wait 15 mins for me at the square, and tried out a new style where I don't kiss her on the cheeks or hold her hand in public, keeping kino to a minimum (playing up the ambiguity of the situation).

When I picked her up I noticed she had made an effort. Was all dolled up: eyeliner, makeup, colored contacts - the works. Additionally, she was tastefully dressed. This intelligent dime had spent time preparing herself to see me.

What is more, after 1.5 hours (walked her to Starbuck's, which she tried to knee-jerk social frame refuse but then submitted to, got beverages, walked her to pretty pond place, sat down next to her watching water, chatting - bringing up the travel gambit frame about my hometown and having her agree with it (she had been there last year by herself looks like), then a passing comment about how girls in my country were still shaming other girls for having fun, and how that was a pity compared with Germany, where people were less conservative, then framing her as a rule-breaker for breaking quarantine, etc.) we were walking back to mine for her to "use the bathroom" as she "had to get back and do some work."

She ended up staying almost 2 hours in my studio (I mean, if she didn't want to fuck, she would have left after using the WC, or after my fumbled kiss attempts. Instead, she remained compliant, and sat on my lap at my command, where she stayed for almost 2 hours while we had a multi-tiered and to all intents and purposes fascinating discussion).

Premature escalation to peck on the lips on my part (hadn't gone into sufficient depth preparing her: had NOT used, as Lofty recommended, crack about how she was right about "hooking up fast" (she promptly told me, when I moved in for the kill, that she "never hooks up fast" (TM) because "most guys are only looking to objectify you for sex, which is unfortunate as I think sex is much more about intimacy and connection, like when someone fully values you for more than just your body," and that those "shallow type of guys are horrible in bed like they'll just flip around for a few minutes only for their own pleasure, which is strange because what I love the most is giving the girl the most intense pleasure possible" a bit of that classic prizing, good sex/bad sex, then maybe work in the purity and mental g-spot gambits before escalating to sex.

All that aside, the realization that struck me today that I wanted to share with you guys is that, when she told me "I never hook up fast," she wasn't rejecting my escalation, she was telling me what I needed to address in order to be able to fuck her.

Now don't get me wrong, I know that we should always prep the girl before making overt moves toward escalating to sex and that getting her to resist at all on the road to sex (in those final moments) usually signifies shoddy game, but this mindset shift can probably be useful to a lot of you who are still running into this sort of cassette-tape reaction.


Hit it with comments or questions.

/Bizz

 

[trashKENNUT]

when she told me "I never hook up fast," she wasn't resisting my escalation, she was telling me what I needed to address in order to be able to fuck her.

Damn right. It's pretty amazing that almost all the high level guys kinda reach to the same similar set of problem.

I won't include myself in the group. Lolx.

I was listening to Chase and Andy recent podcast on Girlschase YouTube. They were talking about the guy is sexy but reality is creepy.

So he is mentally sexy but reality is creepy.

Sidenote, West Archie did a recent post on doing crazy stuff with girls. That thread was quite interesting. People are indirectly putting this together.

It really depends on us, to merge that sex reality, the social reality (her beliefs, then cockblockers, other girls, whatever) and the broader society reality (culture, law, consensual sex law vs commercial sex law, etc)

z@c+

 

[trashKENNUT]

Instead, she remained compliant, and sat on my lap at my command, where she stayed for almost 2 hours while we had a multi-tiered and to all intents and purposes fascinating discussion).

Added, this is fatal.

Now what I mean by this is Causality. I'm going into wacky territory here.

Her jobs is to lead you into either sex or relationship. Her process of talking about 'fascinating discussion' is just causality channelling onto somewhere else, and that is channelling into the relationship medium. This is fatal to new guys. Because newer guys don't know how to pull out of this situation.

In Asia, Girls talk about travel. (Causality channelling to relationship, not sex)

Damn @Chase, your old article finally comes full circle. We could have become Gods, earlier.

z@c+

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

then a passing comment about how girls in my country were still shaming other girls for having fun, and how that was a pity compared with Germany, where people were less conservative, then framing her as a rule-breaker for breaking quarantine, etc.) we were walking back to mine for her to "use the bathroom" as she "had to get back and do some work."

I honestly love watching a master at work.

"most guys are only looking to objectify you for sex, which is unfortunate as I think sex is much more about intimacy and connection, like when someone fully values you for more than just your body," and that those "shallow type of guys are horrible in bed like they'll just flip around for a few minutes only for their own pleasure, which is strange because what I love the most is giving the girl the most intense pleasure possible" a bit of that classic prizing, good sex/bad sex, then maybe work in the purity and mental g-spot gambits before escalating to sex.

And this is very money as well.

All that aside, the realization that struck me today that I wanted to share with you guys is that, when she told me "I never hook up fast," she wasn't resisting my escalation, she was telling me what I needed to address in order to be able to fuck her.

Now don't get me wrong, I know that we should always prep the girl before making overt moves toward escalating to sex and that getting her to resist at all on the road to sex (in those final moments) usually signifies shoddy game, but this mindset shift can probably be useful to a lot of you who are still running into this sort of cassette-tape reaction.

Great realization.

WIA

 

[Bismarck]

Haha thanks for the praise WIA, but I may have been unclear with my OP.

I listed all the crack that I need to learn and apply in the future. (The juice Lofty recommended me, that he took from Teevs and Bacc, that I did not use on HBPhD - it's in red now).

I didn't smash HBPhD. We did nothing more than peck - she didn't even let me make out with her. I bit her neck, and held her hand when she was sat on my lap, and held her delicious svelte legs and rubbed them, but that was it.

The date lasted almost 4 hours but the loss of frame came back at the sex location due to my clunky escalation attempts without prepping her appropriately beforehand. That stuff I quoted from Lofty in red is for me not to forget what I need to work on.

I'm probably never going to see this girl again, and that is fine! (Invited her to meet again but she's gone radio silent). Still had a shot at banging her (and without having to use too much game, she was pretty much good to go (it helped that I had social frame with her)), and from now on will endeavor to not get negative knee-jerk reactions to her resistance, and instead use it as clues as to what verbal smack to whip out and apply.


/Bizz

 

[Starboy]

What is more, after 1.5 hours (walked her to Starbuck's, which she tried to knee-jerk social frame refuse but then submitted to, got beverages, walked her to pretty pond place, sat down next to her watching water, chatting

@Bismarck What was that knee jerk social frame refuse? Was it something like I dont wanna go to starbucks with a guy I just met? How did you did you handle it?

 

[Bismarck]

@Starboy no it was something softer that indicated that places like Starbucks are beneath her, like she goes to more refined coffeeshops or some such. I told her I liked Starbuck’s just fine, and that was that.


/Bizz

 

[Starboy]

She ended up staying almost 2 hours in my studio (I mean, if she didn't want to fuck, she would have left after using the WC, or after my fumbled kiss attempts. Instead, she remained compliant, and sat on my lap at my command, where she stayed for almost 2 hours

All that aside, the realization that struck me today that I wanted to share with you guys is that, when she told me "I never hook up fast," she wasn't resisting my escalation, she was telling me what I needed to address in order to be able to fuck her.

Now don't get me wrong, I know that we should always prep the girl before making overt moves toward escalating to sex and that getting her to resist at all on the road to sex (in those final moments) usually signifies shoddy game, but this mindset shift can probably be useful to a lot of you who are still running into this sort of cassette-tape reaction.

So what do you mean when you say you should've preped beforehand to avoid all the resistance she gave you? What does that entail?

 

[Bismarck]

What I mean is what's written in red: the application of anti-ASD, sexual prizing, purity, and mental g-spot gambits (maybe even 8 orgasms).

That's not the point of the thread though. The point is, when a girl resists but sticks around (after making a huge effort to come see you, travel far, doll herself up, wait for you 15 mins, etc.) back at the sex location, she wants you to overcome her resistance, which we can even call "token."


/Bizz

 

[DarkKnight]

All that aside, the realization that struck me today that I wanted to share with you guys is that, when she told me "I never hook up fast," she wasn't rejecting my escalation, she was telling me what I needed to address in order to be able to fuck her.

You could have written this 3 years earlier Bismarck.. Would have prevented a lot of hurt with my then one-itis .. I was so close.

 

[hey_lover]

I think guys chalk up misses like this to 'shoddy' game and strive to learn just the right gambit that would turn her in the future. And don't get me wrong, it's worth having such a mindset as you seek to grow and add more weapons to your arsenal. But I'd be willing to bet that there was nothing you could have said or done to get the bang.

Like she said, she doesn't hook up so fast. As guys we will read that a million different ways, none of which will be at face value. It's one of the reasons why I've drifted away from the first date bang (unless she is displaying clear signs of 'take me now'). I prefer slower strategies such as Pure Evil's 3 date strategy which casts a wider net and maintains social frame.

 

[Bismarck]

Good points hey_lover. It’s true that the puas who do fast lays tend to either do night game where girls are usually already looking for dick or instant dates from cold approach day game on generally already good to go tourist types.

However, if I had already mastered/incorporated this crack into my standard personality/date process and still came up short, I’d at least know for certain I’d done all I could have on my side and, like you said, in that case, we could say there’s nothing I could have done.


/Bizz

 

[samuraijack]

I had this realization too when I had a girl over, in bed, and i was on top of her, fingered her, and she said she doesn't want to do one night stands anymore. I was thinking the day after, I couldve maybe said something in the moment like "your right, i feel like we have a connection and I'd only want to have sex with people I'd want to see again".

The thing is...I more or less said everything you said in red, prior to the pull. It didn't do anything for the LMR.

This also happened once again, where during the first meet, a girl said I dont do one night stands anymore, i laid out the non judgmental, madonna/whore complex, anti asd frames, and still go the same word for word LMR on the day 2.

I'm wondering if verbally addressing these issues prior to escalation and during escalation is enough, or is it more building tension and turning the girl on so much she can't hold back anymore (which I haven't learned yet).

 

[Skills]

I'm wondering if verbally addressing these issues prior to escalation and during escalation is enough, or is it more building tension and turning the girl on so much she can't hold back anymore (which I haven't learned yet).

you have to do all of that ^ but, sometimes no matter what you do the girl is not going to do it the first time, you need to do a judgment call at that point of keep plowing/being persistent with the objection, or like hey lover said, pull back and then close them on the next encounter..... if I have a feeling the lay is not there, i would do a second encounter, usually night game is easier to do ons if the logistics are there on your favor, if is online/day game/social circle you may need a second encounter ... (not all girls will bang right away as you guys are noticing even addressing most objections)....

however in the case of bismark there were many things going on:

-bismark has been a bit rusty since he was taken care of other priorities he was dealing on his life.
- she is a social circle girl

tried out a new style where I don't kiss her on the cheeks or hold her hand in public, keeping kino to a minimum (playing up the ambiguity of the situation).

^ i personally say hi and give a kiss on the cheek, but keep the neutral/poker for the first maybe 10-15 minutes in a dating situation, but then you have to either build sexual tension and micro escalate cause if not what happens is a huge escalation move out of nowhere and she will be like "where does this come from all of a sudden" , if women refuse an escalation for some reason to recover is a mission now they go on autopilot trigger refusal, which is why i like to build the sexual tension (deep voice, eye contact, caressing, showing that you can kiss but you don't and the likes, does not have to be make out, but just like an approach invite by doing things like that you can get a sense where you are in the physical escalation)... And again(like we discuss in last lr) the whole point of second generation verbal's is to address prior to sex all of that resistance mental dialog so you don't get that resistance...

Bismark did you ask her to text you when she gets home?

 

[Bismarck]

I had this realization too when I had a girl over, in bed, and i was on top of her, fingered her, and she said she doesn't want to do one night stands anymore. I was thinking the day after, I couldve maybe said something in the moment like "your right, i feel like we have a connection and I'd only want to have sex with people I'd want to see again".

I'm wondering if verbally addressing these issues prior to escalation and during escalation is enough, or is it more building tension and turning the girl on so much she can't hold back anymore (which I haven't learned yet).

I used to have muscles and back then my strength and frame derived from it sufficed to make most women submit mentally since they knew physically they didn't stand a chance. My game style was similar to Flux's, very kino and sexual tension-based.

Nowadays yeah it's a bit different. I think what Skills is saying about kissing on the cheek and sporadic touching helps to amp up the vibe but you can also escalate it with SECT.

In my case with this girl I didn't feel I needed to do much of that since from the very beginning I had been flirting with her when I snagged her digitos at an event and so there was no doubt (in fact, she was the one to initiate contact after that) in my mind she knew what I was after.

She's not exactly "social circle," more like an outlier, but yeah. Like at the outer frontiers of a circle, and it's not really a circle, at that.


/Bizz