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Recounting a conversation from last week

politepilot

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Aug 9, 2025
Messages
40
Me: “Hey, could we ask you a question?”
Her: ignored me
Me: “Could I ask you a random question?”
Her: “Yeah.”
Me: “Could I make a painting of you?”
Me: “I’m an artist.”
Her: “Yeah!”
Me: “Ok, so right now?”
Her: “Yeah!”
Me: “Ok, wanna go sit on that bench over there?”
Her: “Yeah, whatever is easiest for you.”
Me: (thinking: well, I just walked over)
Me: “Ok, yeah, let’s do the bench.”

I ended up being too self-deprecating and “blah blah” in my vibe.
She started thinking I wasn’t cool. I was like talking about my paintings but feeling weird for being an artist. I can’t recount the whole Convo rn. I showed her a quick 5-min sketch.

me- so are you from around here?
Her- yeah I grew up here
Me-oh nice me too

sat down on the bench. I was thinking I should’ve walked her over to a grassy area but I had just walked over from there and it’s far.

me-so are you in school
Her-no I graduated last year
Me-oh yeah, obviously you would be I school right now, I don’t even know what’s going on, I’m sort of freewheeling right now.

Her- so are you an artist by profession?
Me-oh no, I’m doing engineering to pay the bills you know I’ve sold some paintings. But it doesn’t pay the bills. I’m actually getting a studio in the[] mall.
her- oh I grew up going there!
Me- well it’s sort of nice to not have a gallery bc then you’re like not worried about like, oh the gallery doesn’t like it, oh…
Her-yeah exactly
She’s looking at some kids yelling from a school bus
Me-is that kid yelling at you
Her- no I think he was just yelling at his friend.
Me getting worried I’m talking about myself too much - not sure whether to brag, self deprecation, or just vent about my art career…feeling her notice that I’m not cool… this whole time I’m drawing her, looking very closely at her body but I feel super awkward and uncomfortable, and I’m not horny, I tried to think of her blowing me but felt weird
Me- so what do you do?
Her- I’m in physical therapy
Me- oh nice I took my grandparents to physical therapy.
her- blah blah about how she works with cool athletes. So she wants to fuck athletes. Note to self be more cool and athletic.
she wasn’t even that hot. She ran back in the other direction. lol I bet I could’ve done an insta date. She said something about “passion” before but I can’t remember. a good sign. Possibly dtf



Her: “Nice 5-min sketch, well I’m on a jog!”
Me: “Wanna do something some other time?”
Her: “Maybe!”

And that was that. I didn’t even get her number. Oh yeah she was telling me about her roomate who painted and I asked to see her instagram and she just flashed me her phone real quick. We definitely weren’t vibing.
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

StrayDog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 23, 2022
Messages
936
so, I am an artist and it has never once occurred to me to try a pick up routine where I sketch girls.

While I can see some potential of this, maybe workshop the whole routine more, I am currently failing to see how this has any added benefit to approaching women and picking them up. At least as a method of hooking. Perhaps after the hook, but that still has the caveat of you potentially offering too much social value and not enough lover value if you don't run it correctly.

As an approach/hooking method. First off, it is a frame that fails to be man to woman right away. it is simply a social gesture. Even if the woman agrees, you still have to hook her. If you fail to hook the whole thing could feel like a bait and switch to her "let me draw you, but I'm actually going to attempt to flirt with you". it is weak and incongruent.

If you can't hook her just with a normal approach, you won't really be able to hook her with this approach.

The only benefit I could she is it buys you time with a girl. But also is kind of awkward and distracting from building rapport between you too.

you are putting yourself in a position where you have to perform an artistic feat, while building rapport.

I would suggest maybe only use this after the hook as a means to move the interaction once there is momentum, a bit of an instant date type thing. But again, personally I would rather just sit and have a coffee with her, as opposed to having to perform. Dancing monkey vibes.

Also, to your other post where you were texting the girl to come over to paint her. I would only play that angle if when we first met there was already strong man to woman frames and the understood subtext was you two are meeting to be potential lovers, PLUS she has really bought into the idea of you painting her. Otherwise I would just suggest a normal ass date.

The art thing can be a good angle to future pace (I'll have to show you some of my work sometime) (maybe I'll have you by my studio to see my work)or get her closer (here I'll show you on my phone). Also can work good lover frames into the artist lifestyle. Or reality paced using artist lifestyle gambits.

It seems like you are not even very comfortable with this aspect of yourself and you are using it as your number one selling point.

First off, no one character trait should be your number one selling point, aside from the fact that you are competent with the man to woman dynamics that are taking place. In pick up this is the number one thing you are selling. The rest is just part of your archetype.

If you are going to make this whole artist thing a part of your archetype you need to embrace it, and integrate it into the whole package.

Otherwise it is just some silly hobby. And women only care so much about your silly hobbies.

If you are an artist be an artist. incorporate it into your fashion, your way of seeing the world, the way you live your life.

If there are unglamorous or unconventional aspects of this embrace it and turn them into Byronic character traits that intrigue the women in your life.

If you are an artist the fact that you are an engineer is either "just a day job that supports my vision of a more creative life" or "engineering and art are one and the same, they feed into eachother. each one taking the other to new heights. But art is not just some silly hobby.

if it is a silly hobby, that's all well and good, but there is no reason to be selling women on it as your archetype.

Maybe it's a complementary aspect of a different archetype. in which case it still has meaning and purpose, but it is there to support the greater vision of something else.

And finally, to this conversation you had with this woman. it is just a basic polite social interview style conversation. No offense dude, but "I took my grandparents to physical therapy" isn't exactly the most erotic stimulating conversation.

You didn't reality paced, or tease, are innuendo, or future project, or qualify, or cold read, or mirror her, or even just open ended questions that allow her to reveal a deeper sense of herself and highlight your commonalities.

So my overall thoughts here are

A: focus more on the man to woman aspect of approaching a woman

and B: if you are going for the artist angle, re work it until it actually has meaningful value to the seduction process
 
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StrayDog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 23, 2022
Messages
936
actually there now that I think about it there is one routine I do where I sketch girls.

So I always carry a notepad or a sketch book in my back pocket. Aside from being hand, I use it for a number of things in pick up. It is a handy tool.

Any way, sometimes when I have hooked a girl and we are flirting I tell her I'm going to draw her portrait really quick. Then I take like two minutes pretending I'm drawing something with a lot of focus. Chatting with her, getting compliance "turn your head a little more this way". and then once I have milked the moment all I can I turn my sketchbook to show her her portrait and it is....

this

😊
 
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