FR+ 
Redhead approaches me

Kvothe

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 5, 2017
Messages
895
So I was doing night game at a new venue on Thursday night. Was out with a wing, and we were doing our usual warm up of premise/sex jokes/sex talk stack to get into the groove. He approaches two girls, saying they look "absolutely adorable". They eat it up and are super into him, flirting and sexual banter. I am kind of on the side trying to figure out how to get into this. I should have tried to match the vibe and banter, but instead I went the more rational route. The girl I was talking to was trying to take a picture of the friend, so I said I'd help her out and I could direct the friend for her. Might have worked if I'd had compliance and more investment from her. Instead she got cold and froze me out, and eventually the two left.

We hung around for a bit, and then this redheaded girl comes up to us, asking if we're from here. I answer and she immediately fully faces me. She's got a cute face, but is reasonably chubby. My wing graciously leaves to "go to the bathroom", and I talk to her for a few minutes. I notice the table near us has opened up, so I tell her that we should grab the booth. We do so, and have incidental touch through our legs, and my arm going over the seat. We talk a bit and do a little deep diving on her. She tells me she thinks I'm incredibly cute. It's pretty loud, so about 10-15 minutes later I tell the girl that we should go somewhere else where it's quieter and we can talk. She says she's not sure, that it seems like a shallow connection, and that I probably do this all the time. And she's with friends. So I say the venue is only a few minutes away and it has a shuffleboard table I have to show her. She thinks about it while I'm telling her, and when I mention the distance she says that she's down. She quickly talks to her friends, and I promise I'll return her home safely. They tell me to promise them I'm not a serial killer.

We walk down, and it's fine, she's asking me all these professional questions about my job which I answer, while trying to make my job sound more exciting than it is. Because she also deals with people in my field, I start making some jokes about how we are arrogant and conceited, which she laughs a lot to. We get to the place, and I go to show her the shuffleboard table, and she says that it wasn't the actual reason she agreed to come to the bar (this is why I think maybe I should have just pulled straight from the bar, but she also seemed very hesitant so I felt another venue would be better to build some comfort). We talk, and I deep dive and build on that. My arm is just resting across her inner leg, and I take multiple opportunities to touch her. I get compliance by telling her to give me her hand to show me her nails. About 20 minutes in or so, I start visualizing her naked in bed with me, and I sense the vibe shift way more sexual, especially in terms of how I'm talking. I tell her that most people in my field are arrogant, but they're kind of boring and annoying. She agrees, and tells me she thinks I'm annoying, then asks if I think she is. I smile sexily and say that she's the most annoying, but part of being annoying is being willing to be aggressive and make moves. She agrees, and I ask if a normal person in my field would do this, then kiss her. We make out, and then I pull back. She pulls me back in for another kiss. I talk a little more, and tell her to "simmer down", but that if there weren't people around, I'd be all over her. I change the subject for a few minutes, then tell her I have the recipe for a blue hawaiian at home (she isn't drinking), and that my apartment has a great view. She says maybe, but then decides that she doesn't want to. I start scratching the back of her neck, and she really fucking likes it. I persist some more, saying it's not too far away, and that we'll only hang around for 30 minutes before sending her off, and that I just wanted to show her the view. She says she's really conflicted and wants to, but feels that staying with me wouldn't be worth the extra few hours of sleep she'd lose due to a 9AM meeting in the morning. She said if she knew me better, or if it were a different day then maybe.

I kiss her again passionately to see if that makes a difference, and she seems like she's wavering. I think the right move here would have been a yes ladder. But I didn't do that, and she said she had to be going, but that she really wanted to see me again. I grabbed her number. Made out a bit again, and headed out. I told her, "last chance", and she said that I had her number, so I corrected to "last chance tonight". She left. Don't think I'm going to text, while she was cute, she was pretty chubby, and I just think I might find better options elsewhere.

But kissed two girls in two weeks, and both were extremely, extremely into me. Looks-wise I think I'm really starting to come into it. I also moved extremely fast, and was more persistent than I've ever been. Even if it wasn't successful, I still chalk that up as a win.

One thing I do wonder is how to make it clear that I'm not a good long-term prospect. This girl said that her last relationship was 2 years ago, and I'm basically the first guy she's talked to since.
 
Last edited:

Hue

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 21, 2016
Messages
1,453
I tell her that most software engineers are arrogant, but they're kind of boring and annoying. She agrees, and tells me she thinks I'm annoying, then asks if I think she is. I smile sexily and say that she's the most annoying, but part of being annoying is being willing to be aggressive and make moves.
With the back and forth teasing here, I think you should have upped her arousal, but not so much as kissing her. Here you probably could have gotten into a playful shoving match back and forth, and then combined that with leading her to cocktails at your house. I probably would have said something to tease her about not knowing what a good cocktail is, as I pulled her. Pushing with your words, pulling with your nonverbals (like talking shit but pulling her into you, or a playful, light shove) works here. Then when you're actually closing, pull with both.
I kiss her again passionately to see if that makes a difference, and she seems like she's wavering.
Yeah, definitely spiked arousal too much. Try not to do that until you've already got her isolated to fuck OR she's putty in your hands with super high compliance (the uber is on the way, you're extremely close to the door of your apartment, etc.). Kissing can be a bold way to rope a girl in, but once you hit full makeout AND she doesn't already have high compliance, you're actually just shooting yourself in the foot. Patience, friend.

But kissed two girls in two weeks, and both were extremely, extremely into me. Looks-wise I think I'm really starting to come into it. I also moved extremely fast, and was more persistent than I've ever been. Even if it wasn't successful, I still chalk that up as a win.
;) Keep it up playa.


Hue
 

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 24, 2020
Messages
285
About 20 minutes in or so, I start visualizing her naked in bed with me, and I sense the vibe shift way more sexual, especially in terms of how I'm talking.
This has happened to me by accident a few times, I never put 2 & 2 together and linked them until you mentioned it above, a change in my mindset has a huge impact on the dynamic between us.

I think I'm really starting to come into it.
I get the same thing, often in 3's strangely, then nothing for a while. I haven't worked out why this is though, is it about me having high confidence or exuding a different kind of body language derived from an internal visualization as above, or something else? I've not worked it out but it definitely isn't luck.

kissed two girls in two weeks, and both were extremely, extremely into me. Looks-wise I One thing I do wonder is how to make it clear that I'm not a good long-term prospect.
There's an article on girlschase about this and there a good seeder line I use about not being "boyfriend" material. Ironically every time I've used it there's been a spike in her interest levels. I'm not sure if this is because she then see's me as a challenge, or simple means she knows we can play without it getting serious.
 

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 24, 2020
Messages
285
I meet a lot of girls out partner dancing, it's my hobby I guess, so when I drop into the conversation ". . . . that I'm not really boyfriend materiel as I'm always out dancing with different ladies . . . . and most girlfriends aren't going to put up with that . . . . " and I give them a mischievous smile and then move the conversation along. They don't usually ask any more than that, but they understand that being exclusive is unlikely - at least in the short term.

This is the article I got the idea from - telling-women-youre-not-boyfriend-material
 

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,465
Location
NYC
We get to the place, and I go to show her the shuffleboard table, and she says that it wasn't the actual reason she agreed to come to the bar (this is why I think maybe I should have just pulled straight from the bar, but she also seemed very hesitant so I felt another venue would be better to build some comfort).

This was a very big clue for you (bolded). It's also potentially a cue to pull her home.

I tell her that most software engineers are arrogant, but they're kind of boring and annoying. She agrees, and tells me she thinks I'm annoying, then asks if I think she is. I smile sexily and say that she's the most annoying, but part of being annoying is being willing to be aggressive and make moves.

Right around now is when you should have pulled her, instead of make out with her.

We make out, and then I pull back. She pulls me back in for another kiss. I talk a little more, and tell her to "simmer down", but that if there weren't people around, I'd be all over her. I change the subject for a few minutes, then tell her I have the recipe for a blue hawaiian at home (she isn't drinking), and that my apartment has a great view. She says maybe, but then decides that she doesn't want to.

The vibe completely shifted here.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Hue

Velasco

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
1,059
She says she's really conflicted and wants to, but feels that staying with me wouldn't be worth the extra few hours of sleep she'd lose due to a 9AM meeting in the morning

Here is where I would have shifted to pulling back to her place.

It's not the extra of hours of sleep she will miss by going home with you. Its her envisioning herself waking up, taking a cab back home to her place, trying to sleep then showering, then trying to make her 9am.

This way she gets to go home from the bar anyway, but gets to have a little smooch smooch (south park reference) before going to sleep.

Make it easier for hoes to say yes.
I grabbed her number. Made out a bit again, and headed out. I told her, "last chance", and she said that I had her number, so I corrected to "last chance tonight". She left.
Also why I never get girls numbers before fucking them haha.
 
Last edited:
Top
>