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Reverse Deep Diving?

persona

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 7, 2013
Messages
17
So I was having coffee with this girl a few days earlier and I was doing a bit retrospection. I found that during the time it felt as if the girl I was with was doing a deep dive on me, continually asking me lots of questions about me and my experiences in school etc...

Is this a good/bad/neutral thing? Or am I letting her control too much of the conversation or losing frame control?
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Estate

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 20, 2012
Messages
798
I've found it depends on what exactly you're looking from her.

If she's steering the conversation it's difficult to make it more sexual unless you are really driving it in the direction you want.

On the other hand... it's sort of a good sign. She is asking lots of questions because she's interested. But she's assessing you as boyfriend material.
I've had women like this too, lots of questions is good and shows interest but it also means she probably has a pretty strict list of "must have" things in a boyfriend. Rarely does this mean she's looking for something casual, and you CAN sometimes get blown out with the simplest of answers which she's not "looking" for.
 

Thedoctor

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jun 13, 2013
Messages
512
persona,

Girls like this, often enough, tend to be a bit more socially and sexually experienced. Which I am not stating as a good or bad thing, just something to keep in mind depending on what you're after.

It is important to try and turn the conversation back on her, that way you can build more of a connection with her. If you sit there and answer her questions all night, you'll kill all the intrigue about you as well as possibly make yourself too attainable. You're also much more likely to slot yourself into boyfriend territory, like Estate said. And this is never a good thing as no guy will ever live up to her expectations when she is looking at it from a logical standpoint.

-John
 

Nova

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 27, 2012
Messages
295
Is it a good thing?

Depends how you look at it. The very fact that she is asking you lots of questions tells me that she is interested in you. She's not just sitting there giving you the cold shoulder trying to end the interaction as soon as possible, BUT the longer you allow the conversation to continue in this manner the less interested she becomes, the quicker the attraction drops, the quicker your air of mystery and intrigue vanishes into thin air.

It's a good sign, but not a good method of operation. Take the hint, she wants to know more about you, great, so amplify that by making sure she does the majority of talking as you sit back and ask the questions, intrigue her more, don't show her your hand, make her prove and qualify herself not the other way around.
 
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