Will,
To be honest, I've never really liked the term "secret society" because it doesn't really depict an accurate statement of the meaning that is trying to be conveyed. When I think of a "secret society," I think of a bunch of people who all band together with this same knowledge and work together to decide who gets to enter it and who does not. That's not how it works.
Instead, think of the "secret society" as more of an "unspoken rule" of the fact that women are willing to do the very things that they communicate they will NEVER do with the RIGHT men. For example, maybe a woman talks about how she would never participate in a gangbang with multiple guys so that she can convey that she is a "good girl" and not a "whore" or a "slut," because she believes these labels/reputations will prevent her from securing a high value mating partner.
HOWEVER, this woman then goes on vacation to Italy for a weekend and meets two very sexy Italian men who are very clear that they want sex from her. She knows the chance of anyone "relevant" finding out about anything she does in a foreign country is next to nil, so she decides to live out some of the fantasies that she swears to friends, family, and suitors (read: Providers) she would never engage in, and she has a threesome with the two men.
When she gets home, she talks about how beautiful Italy was, but she never tells ANYONE (except maybe a reliable best friend who will keep her secret) that she engaged in an orgy with two sexy Italian men while she was away, so her friends and family back home still assume she's a "good girl" and not a slut/whore.
The fact of the matter is, all of these girls make these choices individually, so a "society" isn't quite right word to describe it. Each one has individual ideals and beliefs that they would be willing to break in a heartbeat in the right situation if it's actually something they are curious about or desire. Girls always "suspect" that other girls engage in these activities, but unless those girls are close friends (or were somehow actually involved in these activities with them), then they don't really know for sure. But it's an unspoken rule, so girls will rarely question each other about these things unless the girls are having a fierce verbal argument where their reputation(s) are at stake, and they are working valiantly to defend them.
I hope this clears things up a bit!
- Franco