Self Sabotage.

[demainor]

Hey guys.am gonna put this thread here because l cant think of where it should go, kindly change it to a more appropriate place if necessary
l have been trying to head out in the past two weeks but though l have gotten a few numbers, nothing has come out of them. At first l thought that it was just normal game, you win some you loose some, but yesterday something happened that opened my eyes to another possibility.
l had organized to hook up with three different girls. however, at the end of the day, l had met none at all. where normally l would say it wasnt meant to happen, l saw a pattern emerge. I organize a meet, we have say its gonna be such and such a day and such and such a time but then once l get there, l dont push any harder. let me explain. on the third girl. she said she would be free from 4 in the afternoon so normally l thought she would come over, then l started getting nervous about her coming over, then l started hoping she wouldn't. so 4 rolls in , and l know l should check up but l say nothing, just lazing around waiting for time to pass saying to myself "shes supposed to come over" and l just know this is not gonna help me. she told me to go get her from our uni(l live like 15 minutes away by bus) and funny enough the other girl had told me the same thing, but my body just didnt want to push itself
what am trying to say is, l dont push for the lay. l dont know how to get over this huddle, l havent tried to pull anyone in ages, and when l try l give her massive lee way to say no. l have lost lots of chicks because of this and its very frustrating. l would really appreciate any advice.

 

[Mr.Rob]

What your saying is that you want to get laid and you get potential opportunities to get laid but when the time comes around to actually do it you get nervous and cancel or don't follow up?

 

[Gentle_Phrases]

If Rob's questions are pointing in the right direction, this article by chase should assist you:


https://www.girlschase.com/content/effor ... d-get-laid

and so should this video by Owen:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fANFN_8DPg

 

[demainor]

Yep Mr. Rob thats exactly my problem

 

[Mr.Rob]

that video is a good one that G_P put up I recommend that if you haven't watched already.

what exactly makes you nervous demainor?

You don't want to get rejected?
You have blockages around the physical act of sex (that used to be mine a while back)?
Other reason?

The reason I ask is because I could give you advice on what I think your issue is but it would be a waste of my time to do so not knowing why exactly your nervous.

 

[demainor]

thanks for the reply Gentle,the links are actually pretty helpful. l've decided to go as far out as l possibly can this next two weeks,hopefully l will have better results to posts

 

[demainor]

Rob,let me try to explain it though its not easy,hopefully you'll get what am trying to put across.
ok,again with the three girls,all l had to do was to get in the bus and go for them like 15 mins away and pull them back.but my mind came up with these crappy reasons like l shdnt be the one to go for her, am totaly fine just sitting in and yanking my weener myself(wch is really crapping my morale and l cant seem to stop)
then l thnk am afraid of my performance though l knw am not that bad, l can control my pc muscles and last a bit and l've been reading the sex god method.the area that makes me anxious is the moment after coming where you feel like kicking the girl out.l start thnking 'is this it?was it worth all this stress?' l simply ignore these feelings till l get back to normal

 

[Mr.Rob]

totaly fine just sitting in and yanking my weener myself(wch is really crapping my morale and l cant seem to stop)

Well that's not healthy for esteem.

It sounds like you're mostly just afraid of things not going "perfect". Like not performing well or her rejecting your advances or some other thing that may happen. Though seductions usually aren't perfect and usually something does happen that you'd prefer not happen, it's all in how you handle it.

For example every girl I have sex with I cum prematurely every time... haha that's funny writing that. But seriously it used to be like something that was going to hold me back but now I just own it. Surprisingly every time I've done that the girl doesn't even hardly care as long as I proceed to go back and keep fucking her asap.

That may not be the best example though..

My advice for you is to recognize that you're having hang ups towards this particular instance and take the hero's path and say fuck it to whatever could potentially happen and just burn it to the ground.

Take it one step at a time and don't get caught up in what might happen next, just focus on the next step. So first step is your just going to meet up and chill with a girl, I'm sure your capable of that. Next step escalate, etc. etc.

I feel for you dude but I think in the end the only way out of your situation is to just face it and punch it in the face.

Good luck.

-Rob

 

[demainor]

hey Rob, l just followedyour advice and went forcoffee with this chick, a hb 7. l used the escalation ladder to pul her home but despite all my efforts,didnt get a lay or kiss despite using lots of kino and having a sexually charged conversation.
she said she doesnt like to sleep with guys frm the same class. l don't blame myself fr this since she was comfortable with me touching her but she refused the manhandle kiss several times. l've decided to focus on pulling and simple dates.
now another thng, l paid for the coffee and slice of cake.l truly dnt knw how to ask a chick to split the bill.could this have contributed to her denial?am l giving a boyfrend vibe?

 

[demainor]

forgive the spelling mistakes, am using my phone.

 

[Mr.Rob]

ey Rob, l just followedyour advice and went forcoffee with this chick, a hb 7. l used the escalation ladder to pul her home but despite all my efforts,didnt get a lay or kiss despite using lots of kino and having a sexually charged conversation.

Dude thats fucking awesome! That's a good step in the right direction compared to not doing anything at all. The main thing is that you took action!

l've decided to focus on pulling and simple dates.

Good, find your weak points and work on ironing them out.

l paid for the coffee and slice of cake.l truly dnt knw how to ask a chick to split the bill.could this have contributed to her denial?am l giving a boyfrend vibe?

I wouldn't worry soooo much about that as it's not a life or death situation. I think when Chase wrote that article it was more of a gravy on the biscuit type of deal rather than a deal breaker and I've pulled a girl I've paid for before so don't overthink it. Your biggest concern should be going on dates and not watching porn at the house.

If you want advice for splitting the bill just tell the waiter/cashier you want it on separate checks and then go back to normal conversation like nothing happened. Like Chase says in the article it might make her a bit more difficult to handle but if you can get her back home it'll be easier to sleep with her.

Good luck mate,

Rob

 

[demainor]

thanks a lot mate. hopefully there will be lots of field reports in coming as l gear up my game