She's too busy? Yep, I know what that means...

[Estate]

Hey guys,
Happy new years! I've been quiet for a little bit now. Have been dating a really cool girl through the holidays and new year.

I hate to make one of those "this one girl" posts since really, I know the answer... meet other girls but err... here I am anyway. I figure if anyone knows what to say it's the GC crew.

Anyway, long story short, we were seeing each other a couple of months. She called it off 2 weeks ago. I sort of felt this *could* happen but she put off doing it since we were having a good time. Basically she works long hours, goes to school in the evenings, the work has been piling up and up, she's locked into a whole bunch of social commitments from friends and family. The last few weeks were difficult to even find any decent amount of time and yep... you guessed it... things just too hectic right now, she calls it off. She's gone pretty silent, sent me the odd text but really just seems to want to not dwell on it, so I thought best to leave her alone.

So anyway, I know of the "I'm just too busy to date" line. Basically meaning, she's not too busy to date but too busy to date YOU. I know people WILL make time for someone else if they really want to... but in this case it's a kicker... she DID make that time to keep it going but I guess since it wasn't an extrmely long time, and I could see her being overwhelmed, she decided it best to call it now rather than later. She's not seeing anyone else, I know that also...

So, yes, the "too busy" thing is usually a brush off. In this instance there's truth to it though and I think she called things before we ended up really getting serious.


So with all that in mind, is there any recovery here? I got a few numbers to distract myself. Met one girl this week... I have 2 dates next week if I want to go through with them. At this point I think it's best I just go ahead and meet the other girls but I feel like I'm just trying to distract myself rather than really want anything of them. This one stung a little to loose... haha... happens us all

Any thoguths guys? Give it up? Or... anything that might be worth a try?

 

[ray_zorse]

Standard operating procedure... persist once... twice... don't contact her. If she doesn't contact back in a few months maybe give it one last shot "hey I was just looking through my phone and realized ..." although, this hasn't been successful for me. I think the problem you have is that she isn't chasing, she knows she "has" you... did you let your guard down, be too available... be too honest, share about yourself? Relationship management issues... did neediness creep in the back door somehow? Uhh, yeah I know this is all second nature to you but sometimes a fresh look is helpful. And, get those depressing thoughts handled, you have a few leads to follow up but they don't super excite you. So what, you might approach someone much hotter & super into you tomorrow -- bet that would cure your one-itis Anyway, hang in there bro.
-Ray
Edit: When I say persist twice... I mean something like a rapport building text 10 days after she declines your date invitation... one or two interesting sentences and a how's life your end... 90% likely she'll mention how flat out she is and you can just drop it without looking needy & keep options open.

 

[Smith]

She seems genuinely busy...Maybe send her a parting shot, because pretty much anything else you do now is chasing her.